A bit of a sad one ....

[Greylegs]

.... sorry ....

We lost our old lad a couple weeks ago, sadly, after a mystery illness which our vet now thinks was most likely caused by a tumour in his sinuses. Today, I fetched his ashes back from the vets after an individual creation. I wasn't expecting them to come back in a small, neat pine casket with his name engraved on a brass plaque on the lid. We had planned to scatter them somewhere but my OH now says he doesn't want to do that as he can't think where would be the best place.

So, what do we do with them. Keep them in the house (feels a bit like we're not tying to move on), bury them in the garden (we'd have to leave him behind if we ever get round to moving), scatter them somewhere (we can't decide where ...). The dog had a habit of sleeping behind Mr GL's favourite arm chair, where he felt safe and comfortable, so that's where is at the moment. But longer term, he can't stay behind the arm chair forever, can he?

What did anyone else do under the same circumstances? Thanks all .....

 

[Pearlsasinger]

How about putting the ashes in a tub, with a nice, suitable plant for the garden, which you could take with you if you do move?

 

[meleeka]

I scattered them on our favourite hack and kept the box with some photos, a bit of tail and her shoe in.

 

[Fiona]

I have ours (two dogs and one cat) on the bookcase in the hall.....

Fiona

 

[smja]

My sister keeps her puppy's ashes in a lovely box in her room. Keeping them doesn't mean you can't move on.

I'm sorry for your loss.

 

[Clodagh]

How about putting the ashes in a tub, with a nice, suitable plant for the garden, which you could take with you if you do move?

I like that. All of ours have a tree or shrub, but we cannot move them. A big tub is a great idea. You could have a really nice tree.

 

[Moobli]

Hugs - getting the ashes back is always hard.

I really like the idea of putting them in the bottom of a big tub and planting a tree or shrub so he can go with you if you move.

The last lot of ashes I got back were the same as yours - a lovely wooden box with his name engraved on the top - and in the end I buried them with the body of his best friend when she passed away a few years after him.

 

[Parly]

I scattered my little friend in our favourite woods we'd get up at 5am to go wandering through and have it all to ourselves. She loved those woods so that's where she is :smile3:

 

[Karran]

For many years my childhood Labrador's ashes sat under the stairs. Then when we lost my dad we decided to scatter his ashes in the sea in Lanzarote where my Mum now lives. The idea being that his favourite bar overlooked the sea and that meant he could come in twice a day and have a pint! :-D
We decided to scatter the dogs ashes with him so they would always have company.

 

[AmyMay]

How about putting the ashes in a tub, with a nice, suitable plant for the garden, which you could take with you if you do move?

My neighbour has done this with her beloved dog. It's a lovely idea, I think.

 

[Snuffles]

My aunt used one of those concrete garden donkeys with the paniers to put her dog's ashes in so she could take them with her if she moved.

Its something Ive never been comfortable about - leaving my dogs at the vets for cremation. Never had anywhere to bury the body at home.
Ive never collected the ashes either, but always felt bad about "abandoning " them to be disposed of. Have always thought I couldn't bring the ashes home. Actually never brought my OH's ashes home as didn't think I could cope with it. Every time I get to the end of an animals life I agonise about what to do.

 

[Pearlsasinger]

My aunt used one of those concrete garden donkeys with the paniers to put her dog's ashes in so she could take them with her if she moved.

Its something Ive never been comfortable about - leaving my dogs at the vets for cremation. Never had anywhere to bury the body at home.
Ive never collected the ashes either, but always felt bad about "abandoning " them to be disposed of. Have always thought I couldn't bring the ashes home. Actually never brought my OH's ashes home as didn't think I could cope with it. Every time I get to the end of an animals life I agonise about what to do.

TBH Snuffles, I don't think it really matters what you do, so long as you feel comfortable with it. Having had a Lab pts at home, because she was petrified of going to the surgery, with the other dogs around her, it was really brought home to me how the body really is just the shell which is left behind.
Our dogs were wonderful with the elderly Lab, making sure that they never pushed her/knocked into her etc BUT, as she was lying on the rug in front of the fire when the vet stood up after her heart had stopped, the other dogs were very keen to talk to the vet and stood on the Lab's body as if she were the rug. They would ever have done that when she was alive.
We have left most of our dogs and cats with the vet for disposal, every horse has gone for disposal, we have never had the ashes back. The only animals still on the premises have died here and been buried.
We do have some plants in memorial to some of the horses, although it is something we have only started to do fairly recently. There is a rowan tree which call the coloured cob's because she used to nibble on it, if she got half a chance, when she passed on the way to and from her stable.
I have always intended to organise a plaque in memorial to my OH to fix to one of the drystone walls that he built - he always said that they would be here long after he had gone. But I haven't been able to bring myself to actually order the plaque yet.

 

[deb_l222]

All mine are scattered under one particular tree in the woods where we walk. The reason for this tree in particular is, it has the best view and it's where I intend to finish up when I have left this earth. My poor next of kin are going to have a nightmare as I've every intention of retiring to Spain but I still want to be scattered with this view for all eternity:-

There's no right or wrong to whatever you decide. My friends husband died recently and he's still sat on the settee, watching the TV (or his ashes are) because that's where he spent a lot of his time. Do whatever feels right for you and your other half.

Deb

 

[Cinnamontoast]

I think I'd do his favourite walk and scatter as I went.

Currently, my fil's ashes are on the kitchen table. They're in a nice purple gift bag. I have no idea if that was my mil's idea or the crem's. He's surprisingly heavy.

 

[Greylegs]

Thanks all. Some lovely ideas here and I do like the thought of him being in a tub in the garden, as he loved to be out there and went out as much as he could. One night, when we had a spell of really warm weather earlier this year, we left the conservatory door open by accident when we went to bed. OH remembered at 2.30 in the morning, but no dog anywhere in the house. Cue both of us in dressing gowns with torches searching the garden and we eventually found him snuggled down amongst some shrubs, happily asleep and was a bit bemused to be woken up to come indoors. Maybe we should bury him where we found him that night ... he was clearly comfortable and happy.

 

[fankino04]

I used some of the ashes for a necklace so she's always with me ( I'm not really a jewelry person so not sure how this will play out when the others pass away.....) The rest of her ashes are on the fireplace waiting until we find a really nice fake ornamental tree that we can put them in the bottom of. I didn't want to use the garden in case we moved as I couldn't bear to leave her and neither me nor other half can keep any plant alive longer than 6 weeks and again to have "her tree" die would be devastating so still hunting for the perfect fake cherry tree to go in the conservatory under her picture

 

[Hairy Horror]

I could not bring myself to scatter the ashes of my dogs after they had been cremated. I now have four dogs and two cats in a large wicker basket on the top of the wardrobe in the spare room. Bonkers I know just collecting dust, but to me they are all together again.

 

[CorvusCorax]

Again I think there's no right or wrong...some pets we have buried (the poor woman who bought my Nan's old house will one day discover there's a pet cemetery out back) and others we have collected and scattered ashes, some not.

I found out last night that my dear old uncle Bill 'went' to my cousin's wedding, sitting on the front row with his wife!

 

[FinnishLapphund]

I can only ditto the others, there is no right or wrong. I don't see a problem with waiting with making a decision for a while longer, but somehow placing him were you found him sleeping also sounds like a good idea, regardless if you decide to bury, scatter, or place the ashes in an tub, which you put there. (((Hugs)))

My pets are all buried in our summer home's garden. My mum's Poodle was buried there, so there is a sort of flower bed, which simply have become the place where we bury all the family's pets.