A sign of insanity

Kenzo

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or just spending too much time around horses? :confused:

This morning I went to turn my two out, bobbed back in the field with a wheel barrow of hay for their breakfast as per usual, pile for the mare, empted the rest out for Mr M and said to him ''right then, have a nice day'' and off I went.

Got the gate with puzzled and slightly shocked look on my face and thought wtf am I doing, have a nice day? eh I'm actually telling my horse to have a nice day....:rolleyes: oh dear lord.

Just shoot me now. :o

What strange things have you said to your equine (while alone in serious way) that has actually then freaked you out and made you think whoooah that's just a step too far now!
 
no, it's just you. everyone else here is perfectly sane and doesn't have full conversations with their horses, oh no...
my latest to my (variously naughty) mares when hacking out is "right, i'll look after you and you look after me, that's the deal, okay" and "it's a bit like the line in Knight and Day, about your chances of surviving, with me, without me, got it? with me, without me". it's working so far... ;) ;)
 
This made me laugh OP as I ask the question at the end of the day to my mare - .....have you had a good day? She does stare at me like I am mad.

I also tell my youngest son (9) to #walk on for goodnes sake# or worse he gets a clicking noise from me to gee him along :D
 
Going towards a large (to me) x country fence saying "i will shut my eyes and you jump it" apparently I said it louder than I thought and people standing near by heard it!!!
 
My mare was going nuts in the field and just went too far.
I went over to see her and she galloped past me whinneying (having scared herself :o).

I walked out of the field shouting "I'm off to call the hunt" :eek:
followed by
"no, I mean it, don't try to stop me"
:D
 
My kids were bought up being told to get to heel !!
They have always responded to this and still do with rolled eyes (they are 12 and 14 ):D

I have long chats with the ponies when I am poo picking lucky I dont have neighbours
 
far too much that i'm sure if a psychologist over heard they'd end up sectioning me!

often i tell the horse to 'sit' and the dog to 'trot on' ;)

Yes but have you ever gone to pat your OH, I nearly gave my husband gentle pat on the back and was about to tell him he was a good boy once, can’t remember what he’d done, maybe he’d washed up or something but I genuinely nearly did it!:eek:

I've just remembered that, which has also just freaked me out.

Think we maybe requiring a HHO Mental Asylum!
 
My mare was going nuts in the field and just went too far.
I went over to see her and she galloped past me whinneying (having scared herself :o).

I walked out of the field shouting "I'm off to call the hunt" :eek:
followed by
"no, I mean it, don't try to stop me"
:D

He heee :D love it.
 
I quite often cluck my tongue at the OH when he's taking too long getting his wallet/keys/phone together as we're leaving the house, to which he replies "I'm not one of your ****ing horses!!!". Thing is, I genuinely don't mean to do it at him!
 
Girl that comes to showjump at our yard talks her horse round the entire course, as in:
'Right, first jump coming up, we need to take this one carefully ... good boy, ok, right turn into number two, one, two, three ... good lad, now, number three is a bit scary so I'll just kick on ... GOOOD BOY!! ...'
And so it goes. The audience is creased over by the time they finish.
 
Yes but have you ever gone to pat your OH, I nearly gave my husband gentle pat on the back and was about to tell him he was a good boy once, can’t remember what he’d done, maybe he’d washed up or something but I genuinely nearly did it!:eek:

I've just remembered that, which has also just freaked me out.

Think we maybe requiring a HHO Mental Asylum!

No haven't done that but have clicked at friends when shopping and they were moving too slow :o that freaked them out especially as they aren't horsey :rolleyes:
 
Girl that comes to showjump at our yard talks her horse round the entire course, as in:
'Right, first jump coming up, we need to take this one carefully ... good boy, ok, right turn into number two, one, two, three ... good lad, now, number three is a bit scary so I'll just kick on ... GOOOD BOY!! ...'
And so it goes. The audience is creased over by the time they finish.

There is a lady known on the Northern BE circuit who blackmails her horse when she goes round :D
It goes a bit like "If you jump this one I'll give you an apple....good boy ok now behave on the next and i'll give you two!' :D
its pure genius!!!
 
I don't need a living being to talk to.... I talk to anything, all the time. I even shout at the kettle if it isn't boiling quick enough..........
 
Oh dear lord this thread has had me in tears (from laughing) in work but yes I to am guilty, I told the dogs to "holt!" or often when I let them of there leads to "canter on" did tell my told cob (before I learnt to drive) " now you eat your tea and I shall ring mum for a lift, but do me quiet wile I am on the phone" also well known when out hacking to chat away to poor horses or even my self! I Think I may need help, but no one is brave enough to take on the challenge !! :D
 
Kerilli that mental image had me laughing till I cried! My OH is looking at me as if I am nuts!

I do the whole 'hand held high, hand held low' thing for clarification too. i'm sure they get it. ;) ;)

i thought everyone clicked at people to get them to hurry up. it seems to work. i've never yet patted the OH to reassure him though... have been guilty of saying "kick on, then" when i'm a passenger in a car and someone starts a hesitant overtaking manoevre!
 
I was so angry at my horse yesterday for him being stupid, but didn't beat him up (obviously!) but keep telling him how disappointed I was in him, and how mad I was, in a fairly neutral but stern 'mum' voice - I was yelling at him! :D TBH I think it did affect him, as I am normally always patting him and being nice and he was most put out :o
 
Haha! No, It's not just you! I often tell my boy ' have a nice day / night, be good, stay out of trouble and don't get hurt!' lol!

I often ask him if he's had a good day / night too... now that IS a sign of madness!!
 
Just remembered another one about my mare...

she was bleating away in the field to come in :o
apparently the neighbours heard me yell
"get a life" at the poor mare :eek:
 
Yes, I do all of the above - my family think I'm mad. When my little car is struggling to get up a hill I start yelling "go on will you" and make clicking noises! My teenage daughter is mortified if her friends are in the car. Oh and when my kids were little I used to babble away all the time in the car pointing out fire engines, diggers, etc - they are both now teenagers but I still do it!! Worse - I even do it when I'm in the car alone or with the dogs. And this is the best - I still talk to myself when pushing a shopping trolley round the supermarket - as I used to do when the kids were in the trolley - very strange looks from other shoppers! As my Mother always says - the best people to ask for advice are animals or yourself - everyone else talks nonsense.
 
I was once blathering on to my boy who was scared of some sheep on the other side of the hedge along the lines of "oh are they the famous Yorkshire horse-eating sheep then? Get on with it" when I realised there was a man with the sheep. He probably thought I was completely mad. I also had a dog which used to love looking at other dogs from the car and I got into the habit of saying "there's a dog" when we passed one. I still catch myself doing it, even though the current three don't give a monkeys, and even worse occasionally to an empty car.
 
I am guilty of hurrying a friends child along with a firm "walk on" followed by "stand":o I got a funny look from a nearby lady. I also click at the dogs and always leave the horses in the morning with "be good" and "don't worry I'll be down later with your dinner".
My daughter always talked to her pony going cross country and provided great amusement for the fence judges. When she got her first horse she could be heard coming through the woods saying "steady steady, good boy, steady" over and over. She eventually emerged at a half hearted trot:D
 
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