A week ago today.

Sparkles

Sparkles

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My world crashed.

I lost my beloved, one in a million horse. Very suddenly, virtually no warning [neurological], after just settling and moving back home with them. After quitting my job and selling my other beloved first pony.

To say it was a bad day, would be an understatement. They had to be the most awful 2 hours, of my life, ever. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

I don't remember much of about this time, this night last week if I'm honest. I wasn't in the best of shapes and emotion mixed with alcohol....was possibly not the greatest of solutions.

Since then, still not great tbh, but have no other option but to carry on. Baby coblet, is keeping me sane-ish along with some close true friends.

Without baby coblet...I wouldn't wish to know what it would feel like. He is my safe haven and sanity. I don't think I've spent as much time with him as I have done lately.

He's 'ok', but I think is pining. I'm having trouble keeping him in the field, as my lad was his only 'friend' and is always the lowest of the pecking order, but B was always the one who'd make sure he didn't get crap from anyone. Unfortunately, baby coblet is not getting accepted into the herd, and won't stay in his field safely now, so is currently in whilst I'm going to build him his own seperate paddock this weekend and see how he gets on. Luckily, he copes fine on his own and is not stressing at all and quite loving life.

So yes. My life has pretty much done a 180 in the past week.

Not asking for comments or anything.Just typing away as never really posted properly about it.

I hope all yours' week has been much much better.

Give all your neds an extra hug, and don't be afraid to try anything. You never know when you might not get the chance to again. From now on, I'd rather go for it and risk failing, than hold back from fear or laziness.


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I am sorry for your loss, seems empty to say this but give baby cob an extra hug.... I would do mine but daisy the without any IQ trad was in trad mode whilst doing her rug and was bring a silly billy ...... Big feet bless no brain
 
IMHO at some point you need to write out all the horror of whatever it is that happened, how it happened, what you feel, where you feel things could have been done differently, where you feel blame, where you feel others are to blame and spil the whole lot out.

Then when you are satisfied you either post on here as a soul baring but as you know you will get opinions and flack, or you say "That is in the past, I have done what I can, I now have my good memories and I release the bad ones" print off your words and set fire to the paper and set yourself free.

I know it's too soon but I think you will need to let go.

Best wishes
 
There are times when you feel as if all the crap in the world has landed you :( At times like that it is hard to see through to the good times, but they will come again, they will be different but they will be good again. It is a bit trite, but I will say it, quality of life is much more important that quantity and you and your horse shared quality. You will eventually be able to remember the good times and be glad. The big changes in your life will be hard to adapt to, but you will and life will be good again.
 
So sorry you lost Big Lad CS. What a shi**y time you have had lately. Bury your heart and your head in that coblet fur for a while and only come out when you are ready.

Xxx
 
Well I am really sad to read this but its good on here when you need some likeminded horse people who have been through a loss. I was really shocked to find how it took me quite a few weeks to kind of feel less sad about losing my best horse friend. Even now if I am out and see horses in a field I feel sad or driving along I just suddenly have pangs where I want to smell and see mine again. But it did take me by suprise. I remember not long ago someone posted how down they felt quite a few months after and it was kinda scary but soon after losing my horse I now understand.

It does get less sad if that makes sense as time goes on. But I dreadfully do miss my horse. Your poor little coblet I hope you find a little friend or old friend even that will brighten up coblets world. I remember when I loss mine a friend told me they gave theirs that extra hug and that was nice.

Sending you better vibes and it will get better, keep looking ahead and enjoy little coblet and please give a hug from me.
 
Hey ChristmasSparkles I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, and so suddenly too. I know exactly what you are going through as I lost my boy a week yesterday after a brief lame spell (infected hock joint). My emotions didn't have time to catch up with the speed of events and it's only now that I am 'grieving' for him. We have a little welshie who was Bo's best mate - he's now on his own and pining too but he's a great comfort to me - he got lots of pampering this morning and some huge hugs.

Take each day at a time and don't be hard on yourself - grief goes in stages and losing an animal is no exception - you will feel angry, sad, desperate, guilty etc etc all in waves but eventually you will be able to look back at happy times and maybe look to what form your horsey future will take.

Thinking of you and sending hugs.
x
 
I think the fact you are starting to be able to talk about it is a good sign. I know at the beginning of the week you were really struggling to.

We are all here to listen when you are ready xx
 
hey you ... i was going to PM you to see how you were getting on. I'm so glad that you messaged me and I hope that my words of comfort helped you.

I also know what you mean about the one left behind. I've been having awful issues with my OH's welsh D picking on my vanner, I put a thread on here asking for help, but it just deteriorated into people telling me I was having a strop. Not what i needed at all, at a time when I needed tips and advice.

Keep you pecker up, sweet thing, PM me if you need any further help or advice!
xx
 
I'm so sorry for what sounds like a very tough and difficult loss of a very special horse, having looked back at the pics of your baby coblet I'm sure he will do wonders to help get you through - he's absolutely stunning, and looks like a sweetheart, I'm glad you've got each other to lean on.

I whisper a thank you to my coloured pony every night when I leave him.
 
Dee O'Dorant said:
Then when you are satisfied you either post on here as a soul baring but as you know you will get opinions and flack,

Best wishes
Click to expand...

Christ you would hope not.

FWIW though CS, I do think DO'D is right. You need to let it out, and if that means sitting, and crying like a baby afterwards, so be it. Nobody here is going to tell you that you shouldn't.
Some horses touch you so deeply, they leave chuffing great holes, not only in your life, but also your heart.
I hope you are feeling a bit stronger this week, and you can look back on the special times you had with your lad.
 
Agree with HaffiesRock. Really felt for you last week and I was desperate to post on your last thread.
There is a mountain of support on here for you. Love to you and a huge hug to your Baby Coblet xxx
 
Agree with previous thoughts; when it's time, you should let it all out. Huge hugs, and virtual kisses to coblet keeping you going xx
 
Let the cork out of the bottle, a good cry helps.. yes, I know it's hard to stop the tears once they start flowing, but you have to grieve to start healing.
I lost a beloved pet last year, and I've only just stopped getting really emotional about her. Yes, she's a lot smaller than your horse, and a different species, but the principle remains the same.
She's been gone nearly 2 months, I still get a tear in my eye, when I think of those last minutes I spent with her. I still can't watch the videos of her, but in time I may be able to.
Talking helps, a hug helps even more xx
 
I'm glad you are feeling able to start talking about this CS, take it in your own time and tells us whatever you need to whenever you need to.
Huge hugs to you and to Baby Coblet x
 
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