A WWYD about getting horsey fix.

[pixie27]

Apologies in advance for how rambley this may be...

Beginning of 2020 I broke up with a long-term boyfriend and moved to London for work/social life. (Excellent timing.)

Cue an utterly horrendous time of spending lockdown in a shared house in central-ish London with three (more-or-less) strangers. I'd gone from living 10 mins away from family and spending every evening and weekend with my best friend, her horses & my loan horse. (Who I gave up when I moved.) Then with London/lockdown: no garden, no friends, no horses - it was truly awful.

Now I'm in a better living situation, the company I work for is doing fairly well, I've had a decent promotion and pay rise.

But OH MAN am I missing horses. My boy was PTS just before Xmas (he was retired, it was expected), but that really felt like my last tie to the horsey world was cut. Missing them is almost a physical ache and it's getting me so down. And now that lockdown is (hopefully) easing, I'm hoping I can find a way to get back involved.

In an ideal world, I'd move back home and buy my own again. But new boyfriend has zero desire to leave London. (I would leave in a heartbeat.)

More realistic options:
- Riding at a local-fish riding school, which I've done a few times... but paying £50 to be told to do serpentines for 30 mins isn't cutting it. I miss the bond, the time on the ground just chilling with them, mucking out, making feeds, the whole lot. (I even miss untangling electric fencing.)
- Hacking once a week around one of the big London parks.
- Look for a horse share/loan in the Surrey area, and suck it up that I'll have a long-ish drive to get to/from a yard.

This is a bit of a pity post, so apologies for that.

But basically how did other Londoners/city-dwellers cope with missing horses, and how did you work around it? And WWYD?

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

Is Surrey the nearest horse area near you in London?

 

[AmyMay]

There must be plenty of off road riding in Brighton.

 

[fredflop]

I think for now I’d try and enjoy the hacks available in the London parks. What about seeing if any of the inner city riding schools needs a hand

 

[pixie27]

Is Surrey the nearest horse area near you in London?

Yep I'm in West London now, so I think Surrey and maybe Middlesex (?) are my closest non-London areas. I don't really know this area too well tbh so this is just from my use of google maps.

 

[chaps89]

There was a similar post recently and I think it was the light cavalry or similar in Windsor was suggested
I suspect sharing might be your best bet to get a more rounded horse experience than just turning up to ride.

 

[Auslander]

You're back! You know what I'm going to say! West London isn't that far from me!

 

[pixie27]

There was a similar post recently and I think it was the light cavalry or similar in Windsor was suggested
I suspect sharing might be your best bet to get a more rounded horse experience than just turning up to ride.

Thank you, I just did a quick search and found the thread! Will do some digging on the suggestions in there.

You're back! You know what I'm going to say! West London isn't that far from me!

I am! And you really aren't that far away at all!!
(I'm very out of the loop as I deleted Facebook a while back!)

 

[Tiddlypom]

I’d ditch the current boyfriend and then move away from London...

 

[pixie27]

Haha! Tiddlypom - I've been considering it more and more recently... But that's a whole other story!

 

[RachelFerd]

Apologies in advance for how rambley this may be...

Beginning of 2020 I broke up with a long-term boyfriend and moved to London for work/social life. (Excellent timing.)

Cue an utterly horrendous time of spending lockdown in a shared house in central-ish London with three (more-or-less) strangers. I'd gone from living 10 mins away from family and spending every evening and weekend with my best friend, her horses & my loan horse. (Who I gave up when I moved.) Then with London/lockdown: no garden, no friends, no horses - it was truly awful.

Now I'm in a better living situation, the company I work for is doing fairly well, I've had a decent promotion and pay rise.

But OH MAN am I missing horses. My boy was PTS just before Xmas (he was retired, it was expected), but that really felt like my last tie to the horsey world was cut. Missing them is almost a physical ache and it's getting me so down. And now that lockdown is (hopefully) easing, I'm hoping I can find a way to get back involved.

In an ideal world, I'd move back home and buy my own again. But new boyfriend has zero desire to leave London. (I would leave in a heartbeat.)

More realistic options:
- Riding at a local-fish riding school, which I've done a few times... but paying £50 to be told to do serpentines for 30 mins isn't cutting it. I miss the bond, the time on the ground just chilling with them, mucking out, making feeds, the whole lot. (I even miss untangling electric fencing.)
- Hacking once a week around one of the big London parks.
- Look for a horse share/loan in the Surrey area, and suck it up that I'll have a long-ish drive to get to/from a yard.

This is a bit of a pity post, so apologies for that.

But basically how did other Londoners/city-dwellers cope with missing horses, and how did you work around it? And WWYD?

I moved to London (14 years ago now!!) and intended to give up horses when I did so. Instead I ended up sharing a horse in Mill Hill and teaching at a riding school in Richmond park on both days of every weekend. Couldn't quit it.

There are livery yards around Mill Hill and also around Edgware if you're in N London, around Heathrow if you're in W London, Epping Forest if in E Londond, and around Epsom if you're in S London. All are a trek, but I found that learning to ride a motorbike was a surefire way of avoiding traffic!

I also have a friend who rides household cavalry horses in Hyde Park every weekday morning as a civilian. Has to get up early and be smartly dressed, but gather it is great fun. Think you need to do a bit of asking around to get a way in there.

When I worked with racehorses in Epsom we also used to have the odd weekend work rider who would travel out of the city to ride out - only for the brave though

I left London a long time ago. Now i'm in central Manchester, which is far more do-able for having horses and still getting the benefit of city life. Would tell OH to stuff London and move to the North. It's far cheaper and you still get all of the 'big city' fun things to do.

 

[Auslander]

I am! And you really aren't that far away at all!!
(I'm very out of the loop as I deleted Facebook a while back!)

A certain little bay mare would love to be doing something!

 

[FourLeafClover]

I was in London for uni, and just found that city life and horses did not work well together. The financial limitation of being a student of course had a lot to do with it, but I still found the two worlds just very hard to try and piece together how they would work. It was always my plan to move 'home' (Essex) as soon as I was able and buy my first horse, which I did! Moved back 5 years ago and had the horse for 4 and a half. Don't regret a second of it.

And a boyfriend would have been well ditched in favour of ponies

 

[PurBee]

Wow...sounds like you been through mega changes. Well done for holding out!

you made me laugh with your comment of even missing untangling electric fencing! Oh the strops i’ve had in fields unlooping the stuff! ?

i’d put an advert out there, anyone needing help exercising their horse.
Also i’d find the most local stables/yards to me and ask if they are ok for me to pop round and poo pick/groom/smell hay and horses...just to get the fix.

If the only reason youre staying in london is because of new boyfriend...i hate to say it, but unless you know youre really meant for each other and this ‘connection’ is unlike anything youve ever known...so worth sacrificing your location wants to be where he wants to be....then i’d say move. I’d say move anyway, as true Love out-lasts distance, so its a true test of whether the bond is strong or not. All relationships do well with challenges, and a distance separation always sorts the true love from the temporary infactuation love.

The above applies if city life is really not for you too, and there’s nothing at all but boyfriend keeping you there.

Question do you really want to move due to people, family friends from previous location? Or other people, i.e boyfriend also keeping you in London? You get to choose whats important in your life, if its family, stay near them, if its intimate loving connection, stay in london, if its friendship...move where your best friends are....if its horses...move to where you want to enjoy them. Rarely do we find ALL we want in 1 location, and sacrifice is called for. So its more about deciding what aspects of life are really important to you, and go there and enjoy that thoroughly.

The one major secret in life i’ve discovered through experience, is that whatever im willing to give up for it’s sake, i normally get it back again with cherries on top. So, for instance, once broken-heartedlyi gave up horses for their sake, and 2yrs later they returned and the situation was different and resolved.
We rarely like to give up what we love, but if we are willing, paradoxically the rewards are substantial.
You may move from london and current boyfriend may realise love is more important than location and move to you...or you guys break up if you move, but in the new location, Mr Dreamy is waiting.

Horses are everywhere, luckily...yay for us horse lovers...?...so you can get your fix in various ways. I agree 50 quid for half hour circling seems expensively boring. Surely there’s many out there wanting their horse exercised?

Wishing you loads of luck ??

 

[Lipglosspukka]

What if he never wants to move? Can you really imagine living in London for the rest of your days?

I doubt it. Leave him and go home. You need to remember who you are.

 

[AmyMay]

Haha! Tiddlypom - I've been considering it more and more recently... But that's a whole other story!

If that really is the case, and you’re not invested in the relationship- then it’s certainly a serious consideration to make (based on your first post).

 

[Northern Hare]

When I lived in London (Pimlico) and worked in Central London, I was a member of the Civil Service Riding Club, who also accepted non-CS members. It was fantastic - the Club owned about 10 horses (which were also used for the RDA) which were kept at The Royal Mews, so lessons in the beautiful school there, riding in Hyde Park and the outdoor school in the park.

In the summer we had jumping lessons in the paddock in front of Kensington Palace. It was wonderful and I spent almost all my free time there volunteering for mucking out duties, and exercising the horses in Hyde Park before work.

I don't think the Club is still at the Mews, but I'm sure I read on here about the London RC which sounded good, with lessons and hacking out of town and social occasions, so it might be worth checking them out.

 

[PeterNatt]

Why not offer to help and exercise the horses at one of the inner City London Riding Schools such as The Ebony Riding Club, Wormwood Scrubs Pony Centre, Kentish Town City Farm etc.?

 

[piebaldproblems]

There's good off-riding possible around Epping, and Epsom. You can also try Richmond Park (a little cheaper and a bit more variety than Hyde Park). N. London (especially Barnet) is a hotspot for liveries too, if you want to part loan. In general, if you can drive to the greenbelt, you can find horses to ride. There's also a bunch of city farms with horses who could use volunteers after lockdown's over, but keep in mind volunteers rarely get to ride. Trent Park/Lee Valley volunteers also get free lessons if they volunteer enough hours, or so I've been told. You can also try the Riding Club London, the civil service riding club, or ride horses for the household cavalry (but you need to know the right people).

But life in London's not worth it if you're not happy there. I'd consider a long distance relationship if I were you (not that it's any of my business).

 

[piebaldproblems]

Also if you've got the money, but want something more interesting than the normal riding school lesson, you can take polo lessons in Epsom, the Docklands, and on the Herts border. Or classical dressage lessons at Ham House and a couple other places in the South.

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

Yep I'm in West London now, so I think Surrey and maybe Middlesex (?) are my closest non-London areas. I don't really know this area too well tbh so this is just from my use of google maps.

You have one offer already for riding I am sure you will get a few more, if you ever fancy venturing to Hertfordshire I have 2 Arabs if you wanted a ride both school really well, they can be opinionated so not for real novice riders but they don't do anything bad

 

[Northern Hare]

I'm not sure where abouts you are in London (sorry if I've missed that), but there are a lot of livery and competition yards around Chorleywood and Rickmansworth on the Herts/Bucks border, and both are well served by the Metropolitan Line underground and the Chiltern Line mainline trains (ie. Baker Street and Marylebone Stations). Quite a few yards would even be within walking distance or a short taxi ride of the stations. If you look you'd maybe get a share - or help with the exercising etc.

Good luck! ?

 

[Gloi]

When I lived in London (Pimlico) and worked in Central London, I was a member of the Civil Service Riding Club, who also accepted non-CS members. It was fantastic - the Club owned about 10 horses (which were also used for the RDA) which were kept at The Royal Mews, so lessons in the beautiful school there, riding in Hyde Park and the outdoor school in the park.

In the summer we had jumping lessons in the paddock in front of Kensington Palace. It was wonderful and I spent almost all my free time there volunteering for mucking out duties, and exercising the horses in Hyde Park before work.

I don't think the Club is still at the Mews, but I'm sure I read on here about the London RC which sounded good, with lessons and hacking out of town and social occasions, so it might be worth checking them out.

Gosh that takes me back. I used to be in the civil service 70s to 80s and when I got sent on courses to London I went there a time or two.

 

[MidChristmasCrisis]

When I worked in Covent Garden I decided to move from Putney and live in St Albans so that I could continue riding. I rode 4 times a week in 3 different stables and did a horse management certificate at Capel Manor too..it’s possible to get horsey fix.

 

[pixie27]

Thank you all for the suggestions! Lots of googling to keep me busy this weekend. I have a car and live pretty close to the M4/A4 so hopefully will be easy (ish) to get out, now that I've got some place names to explore.

The boyfriend points - it's a tough one. We live together (incredibly rushed, but it's amazing how the thought of nicer house + slightly cheaper rent will cloud judgement) but haven't been together long. I'm trying not to think about it/make any decisions until we're out of lockdown, as I'm definitely struggling to figure out which feelings are caused by lockdown etc., and which are 'real'. We've spoken briefly about leaving London, but he won't consider it for at least a couple of years.