Adding a third horse?

[HashRouge]

Looking for honest opinions. How would you feel about adding a third horse (elderly gelding) to an extremely pair bonded duo (elderly mare, middle aged gelding) who have been kept as a pair for seven years? The pair bonded duo have not shared a field with another horse in all that time.

 

[Spotherisk]

Three isn’t a great number. I added a young mare to pair bonded geldings and after two months they still weren’t settled, it created disharmony. In my case it may have been easier with a gelding (they were a band of three geldings for about four years).

 

[doodle]

I probably wouldn’t. Sultan and Minto were pair bonded. Had been alone for a few years. Add another horse and Minto would try and kill any other horse that came near to sultan.

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

I don't think I would want to put another horse in with your pair, in case the gelding fight over the mare. Equallly if you put a mare in with them the mares could fight over the gelding.

 

[Sir barnaby]

I have in the last 5 years had two together, mine A gelding, and a temporary loan a mare, which is usually to provide a temporary home for a hunter over the summer which goes back in October and another horse at rest comes in their place for the winter and Last year one of my favourite mares came back to join other two for a short time until she was sold, to start with I put her next to the other two with electric fence between, once they seemed settled I inter-grated them together and they were fine for two months Until 3rd was sold, so I would see how the get on separated by a temporary fence and them after a week or so put them all together and see how they get on.

 

[TPO]

I'd agree that three isnt a good number.

I have three but the original two prefer each other and while they arent nasty to no.3 hes definitely not in the inner circle and it shows.

Even with three when one leaves neurotic TB has a meltdown and the supposed companion does too, regardless of them always having company and not being particularly keen on each other ?

 

[SEL]

I did it this year. My mare and gelding have been together 5 years but a new pony came my way.

It was a rocky start! I built a large pen within their field for the pony and waited about 10 days before I introduced her in person. The first night all 3 were in together she ended up taking down the mains electric - wooden posts and all.

Wasn't sure what has happened until I saw my usually saintly gelding corner her and kick the h3ll out of her later that day.

So I took the pony out!

It took another 3 weeks of slow introduction before they finally settled. The gelding now adores her and i am finding my mare's separation anxiety a lot easier to deal with.

 

[HashRouge]

Thanks guys, I'm not particularly keen I have to say. I own the pair bonded mare and gelding, but YO is semi insisting that I accept the addition of a 3rd horse. I'd like to stress that I've been with this YO for 4 years and there has never been the remotest suggestion that mine should share with another horse. New horses simply get their own paddock, and that is what I would like to happen in this case too! However apparently the owner of this horse wants it to share. I'm trying to work out how to put my foot down without offending YO.

 

[JoannaC]

I have three and the new one was added last year. It works fine, the two mares had to sort out the hierarchy between them but neither of them question that my old boy is the boss. I think two mares and a gelding probably work better than two geldings and a mare though. Mine are all arabs so are more inclined to get on than if I introduced a different breed.

 

[TPO]

Thanks guys, I'm not particularly keen I have to say. I own the pair bonded mare and gelding, but YO is semi insisting that I accept the addition of a 3rd horse. I'd like to stress that I've been with this YO for 4 years and there has never been the remotest suggestion that mine should share with another horse. New horses simply get their own paddock, and that is what I would like to happen in this case too! However apparently the owner of this horse wants it to share. I'm trying to work out how to put my foot down without offending YO.

I think you need to point out that you're a good customer of four years with two horses and this is an unknown new person with one horse.

I appreciate the want for herd turnout and asking for it but if your agreement is individual turnout, or in your case you can keep your own horses together, then it's not right or fair for YO to offer your horses up as companions. It would be different if there was a precedent of group turnout.

 

[exracehorse]

I tried adding a gelding with my bonded mare and gelding. My chap nearly killed the other gelding as the mare is his bitch ?. He had to go in separate field. He was lonely so fence walked. Ended up getting him a companion ... a mare. Now , the two mares fight over the fence ! I give up ?

 

[PapaverFollis]

I added an elderly pony mare to my mare and gelding pair. It worked and they are a very happy little herd. But the original pair had only been together for a few months and the mare prefers other mares anyway. So now the mares are bessie mates and they tolerate their "stallion" who mostly enjoys bossing them about while they quietly roll their eyes at each other and get out of his way.

I don't think a gelding would have worked. Unless it was a very submissive one. Also by chance ended up with the gelding separate (barn rest, due to an abscess and mud) from the girls for a couple of months immediately after little mare arrived. Which helped establish the nice herd dynamic too I think.

 

[magicmoments]

The trouble with a small herd that aren't all yours. What happens if you want both of yours in yard, leaving the other livery on it's own.

 

[Lots of Gift Bags]

I added a mare to my 2 geldings a couple of months ago, and there wasn't really any bother after the first few days when the mare came into season. Having said that, if I were in your position I probably wouldn't be happy about adding another horse into the mix.

 

[SEL]

Oh if its not yours then I'd say no! I feed in the field and I can organise it when they're all mine but throwing another horse on a different routine in there would lead to carnage

 

[Marigold4]

My elderly companion mare sadly was put to sleep, leaving me with three. Tried putting them together, but pair bonded mare and gelding fought the other one off. Got a companion for the lonely mare, but companion jumps the fencing and makes a three with the other two, leaving lonely mare on her own! I give up!

 

[Sir barnaby]

I think your very lucky if three do get on gelding is in charge and much better if he’s with 2 mares than a gelding and a mare, I fed in the field according to the pecking order and was lucky not to have any problems unless it was windy and they were charging about then you had to be careful when giving them breakfast and tea. Get feeds in then get out of way, try it and separate if necessary.

 

[HashRouge]

I do feed in the field and mine are extremely feisty when it comes to feed time! I'm tempted just to tell the YO that my sister (who owns the gelding, though I look after him) has put her foot down and said no to a third horse. Passing the buck a bit but hey ho...

 

[HashRouge]

Well I just messaged my YO to say that I'm happy for her to create a separate paddock for new horse and very happy for them to use the spare stable where I am (I've got a separate set up to the main yard) but that I want to keep mine as a pair. I really hope she's okay with this. I think I've been a good livery customer - always pay on time, don't make unreasonable demands (basically the only thing I ever text her about is if she can put sun cream on/ take rugs off and I do pay for these services), keep my fields perfectly poo picked, look after my horses well and, unlike anyone else, provide and set up all my own electric fencing (whereas YO does everyone else's when she moves from summer to winter fields and vice versa). I really don't want to have to try and find somewhere else, but ultimately I have a 27 year old who is probably in her last couple of years and is extremely happy and settled with her field mate. I really, really don't want to upset that dynamic. To put it into perspective, the 27 yr old is quite a funny character with other horses and can't bear them getting to close to her and has always had a reputation for kicking (not a might kick, but will kick). But with her field mate, I can lead them together, tie them up together, they will eat from the same hay pile and go in the stable, and I know I don't have to worry about her kicking him and him retaliating. They've been together for so long, I just know they are really settled.

Fingers crossed everyone!

 

[canteron]

I actually prefer having 3 - it does mitigate the extreme pair bonding and overall I think the horses are happier. However, it does take time - and I mean months not days - for them to work out harmonious relationships and initially requires thought and management (as do all things horse!!).

 

[Polos Mum]

right decision OP, it could be done if you wanted to take time and care to do it but it would be a lot of effort from you and the new livery (who you can't control) - to accommodate a stranger for an unknown period of time I wouldn't and I'd do what I could with YO to avoid the time and effort required

 

[CavaloBranco]

Maybe you are such a reliable and easy-going livery that YO is trying you first?! I think that you are quite justified in giving a firm "No"

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

I would just say one can be aggressive to new horses most people just seem accept that and move on.

 

[autumn7]

Introduced new companion aged 6, seven weeks ago to established pair of mares who have been together solely for five years. Took one month before all are fully integrated and all really good and surprisingly no-one is left out. The little herd of three are far happier than the herd of two I've had for several years due to the fact that the middle easy-going mare gets on equally with both and has proved a wonderful mediator. Needed an extremely careful introduction process though as one mare is extremely dominant and can be a nasty piece of work. (All three are mine are kept at home so I have the time to re-configure fence lines and mix and match carefully over as long as it takes which I appreciate isn't possible at a yard). Today I've had to make the most painful decision that one of these precious three will need to be put down. Am arranging now. Am dreading what the relationship between new companion and ridden mare will be between them now. New companion was introduced 6 weeks ago. Pony that will be pts is the pair bond of five years to my older 18 yr old mare. It may or may not take much time and effort into introducing a new horse to an existing pair of well bonded horses. It can be done but no-one can possibly predict how easy it will be and how long it can take. Having had a herd of three at times throughout my life, I find they're generally happier and their lives are more complete than a herd of two. In time I intend to take on a third as a non-ridden companion, simply because I find mine are happier in a herd of three than two.

 

[chaps89]

If it was one of your own on the same routine, maybe, with a lot of careful integration.
One belonging to someone else, given yours are older and pair bonded/been on their own together for a long time, would be a no from me too. And that's before you get into whether you and the other owner have the same ideas on field maintenance, poo picking, haying etc.
From what you've said, your YO seems to like you and it's not unreasonable to say no so hopefully she will be ok with your response