Advice on my horse share

[Rose24]

Regarding how long you are there and the fact that the owner is keen that the field is cleared every time someone is there, I’d say you’re the only one doing the poo-picking and she is either doing the odd barrow or none at all.
Generally, I’d say that on your days you should be doing the daily jobs such as fly spray, grooming (if riding), rugging, feeding and poo-picking what has accumulated since the previous day.
It’s unacceptable that the tack isn’t always there for you to use and she definitely shouldn’t be asking you to prioritise these other jobs over riding. As you point out, you are paying her, not the other way round, so she shouldn’t be asking you to do any extras such as cleaning rugs, unless it’s in exchange for you paying less.
What she really should be doing is advertising this as a paid job, seeing as she doesn’t seem to want you to ride anyway. It really annoys me that some people have the nerve to treat others’ like this!

I used to share a horse 2/3 days a week like you and on my days I fed, hayed, watered, soaked haynets, changed rugs, either mucked out or poo-picked (but it was done daily!), groomed and rode. The only other thing I did was clean tack but she didn’t expect that done after every ride. She wouldn’t normally have expected me to do any jobs that weren’t the normal daily ones.

If the horse was ideal then it might be worth bringing it up with her but he sounds far from ideal and from what you’ve said it sounds like you’d be better off looking for a different share.
Difficult situation I know, suitable shares are really hard to come across, I know from my own experience! I hope this experience won’t put you off.

Thank you, this is very useful. As you say, putting some boundaries in place would be worthwhile if it was an ideal set up in other ways. Such a shame because he's a beautiful lad and so gentle to work with, but the tearing off and being hard to control when he goes, even if it only occurs once in a blue moon and the constant effort to keep his head up and out of the verges is both hard going and makes me think I'm not the right rider for him.

 

[Gloi]

Thank you, this is very useful. As you say, putting some boundaries in place would be worthwhile if it was an ideal set up in other ways. Such a shame because he's a beautiful lad and so gentle to work with, but the tearing off and being hard to control when he goes, even if it only occurs once in a blue moon and the constant effort to keep his head up and out of the verges is both hard going and makes me think I'm not the right rider for him.

It also sounds as if he has just learnt that he is stronger than the sidepull. He could really do with something that gives the rider more control and if the owner won't allow that then don't ride.

 

[Rose24]

It also sounds as if he has just learnt that he is stronger than the sidepull. He could really do with something that gives the rider more control and if the owner won't allow that then don't ride.

Thank you, this is useful. I've been waiting for the owner to get us back into riding with a bit for six months, but she's been putting it off.

 

[Cloball]

You can get taken for a ride with shares sometimes people will treat you like they are doing you a favour letting you ride their dangerous horses. I once had a share on a horse described as green but safe took him out by myself after a few rides in company and he took off with me over a wall and onto a side road I considered bailing off until he finally calmed down. Turns out he'd done this multiple times before and put someone through a fence. no one else on the yard would ride him! No one thought to tell me this until after, still never got it directly from the owner. I would try an ad I found my two good shares as a student that way. Also some crepy buy highly entertaining offers

 

[Rose24]

You can get taken for a ride with shares sometimes people will treat you like they are doing you a favour letting you ride their dangerous horses. I once had a share on a horse described as green but safe took him out by myself after a few rides in company and he took off with me over a wall and onto a side road I considered bailing off until he finally calmed down. Turns out he'd done this multiple times before and put someone through a fence. no one else on the yard would ride him! No one thought to tell me this until after, still never got it directly from the owner. I would try an ad I found my two good shares as a student that way. Also some crepy buy highly entertaining offers

Hahahaha, well now I'm looking forward to the weird but entertaining offers.

 

[Cloball]

Hahahaha, well now I'm looking forward to the weird but entertaining offers.

I'm always slightly disappointed I didn't take up the offer of free boot cleaning, I was just concerned about the state of my boots if I ever got them back.

 

[Rose24]

Oooh!!! My boot are always chucked into a mud tray in my car and are absolutely filthy, so will look forward to receiving such an offer.

 

[Lucky Snowball]

I didn’t get past half way of reading this. I poo pick 3 living out and get 2 barrows a day. Takes 30 mins. My advice would be to finish this arrangement and look on Facebook. If you were closer you could pay me to do all the work!

 

[Rose24]

I didn’t get past half way of reading this. I poo pick 3 living out and get 2 barrows a day. Takes 30 mins. My advice would be to finish this arrangement and look on Facebook. If you were closer you could pay me to do all the work!

Thanks Lucky Snowball, if I was closer, I'd gladly do. Yeah, I don't mind the work at all, but it has to be an even split of work.

 

[I'm Dun]

You can get taken for a ride with shares sometimes people will treat you like they are doing you a favour letting you ride their dangerous horses. I once had a share on a horse described as green but safe took him out by myself after a few rides in company and he took off with me over a wall and onto a side road I considered bailing off until he finally calmed down. Turns out he'd done this multiple times before and put someone through a fence. no one else on the yard would ride him! No one thought to tell me this until after, still never got it directly from the owner. I would try an ad I found my two good shares as a student that way. Also some crepy buy highly entertaining offers

I have a friend in a wheelchair after a share horse she tried out reared up, came over backwards and shattered her spine. The horse had done it before. The horse that broke my back was a bolter, but they didn't think to tell me until after the event. People are a disgrace sometimes!

 

[Rose24]

I have a friend in a wheelchair after a share horse she tried out reared up, came over backwards and shattered her spine. The horse had done it before. The horse that broke my back was a bolter, but they didn't think to tell me until after the event. People are a disgrace sometimes!

Sobering, I'm Dun... Thank you for putting that in perspective. I don't want to be cowardly or lacking in determination, but sometimes discretion is the better part of valour. X

 

[SaddlePsych'D]

Sack it off OP.

1 - a sense of self-preservation is not lacking in determination or cowardly, it's essential sometimes and this sounds like one of those times.

2 - this person is taking the absolute P. It doesn't matter how good or experienced (or not) a rider you are, no-one deserves to be treated this way.

 

[Sanversera]

Deleted

 

[kayeandGin]

Hello! I'm new, having been lurking for some time, I decided to join properly and could use some advice.

Apologies this is long, I'm trying to add in the details I think might be helpful.

I picked up a horse share for 2-3 days a week recently at £27 per week. This seems about average for my area (North Midlands), with some the same cost with the horse in livery and some more expensive (also in livery) -this is a share not in livery, with the horse in an open field. I can't really find any comparable shares to make a direct comparison.

I'm not an advanced rider. I rode when I was young and then had a long gap away from lessons. I'm in my 30s now and picked up riding lessons again about a year ago. I can trot and canter well enough. I wanted a horse share to give me more consistent riding experience and opportunities to spend time building my confidence in handling horses beyond the riding school experience of having a horse handed to you tacked up and ready to go.

I'm very grateful for the opportunities my horse share has provided and love to spend time taking care of the horses, but I'm unsure of what reasonable expectations are on both sides in a horse share like this.

My horse share horse lives out year round in an open field without a stall with a companion horse. At present each time I go to the horses I'm down for around three hours and will clear the large field of poop (owner is keen on this being done each time one of us is down there, it's quite a job and often I'll fill at least two barrows, sometimes four), set out hay, put a new haynet in to soak or take it out to drain, sometimes feed mash and supplements, etc, depending on time of day, groom, treat any skin conditions or bites, put on fly spray, put fresh rugs etc on as needed and do exercises and stretches. I'll also help out with the companion horse sometimes, although he's not part of the share.

Out of the two or three days I go down, I don't always have access to tack, or someone to ride with (see below for more on this) so I'll get to ride once most weeks, sometimes twice if I'm really lucky.

Sometimes the owner will make it clear that they expect the above tasks (and some occasional additional ones like cleaning rugs or moving equipment) to be prioritised over riding and on some occasions the tone of the requests is rude and entitled, in my view (and will need to be dealt with if we're to continue to work together). I like to learn and work hard, but I do think the owner forgets I'm paying them and not the other way round, sometimes. There's also been requests to cover holidays and feed twice daily, etc, etc, without anything in return, not even waving that weeks fee or something.

In addition to some reservations about the amount of work I'm putting in at present, I also have some worries about the horse and his set up in terms of tack, etc. He's a big old boy, 21 year old ID, affectionate and sweet when I'm working with him on the ground and I've appreciated grooming and spending time with him to bond. However, he's extremely food driven when out on hacks and it's a lot of work to keep his head up and out of the verges. He's on the whole very placid and doesn't spook when out on the road, but he does have a history of bolting in fields when he spots a path he wants to follow, usually a very narrow one with low branches over, which is tricky on a tall horse! He's currently on a bitless bridle, apparently because of issues with behaviour when in a bridle after an overly harsh rider and former horse sharer had been riding him in a bit... The above issues worry me a little. He's good out on the road, but I've felt him gear up to start up into a possible bolt a couple of times when in a field with a narrow path leading off. On the one occasion he started to bolt with me, he wouldn't respond to me trying to turn him into a circle or use pulley rein (I'm not even sure if this works well in a side pull bitless, but had to try something quickly) and only stopped of his own accord to eat some tempting grass before he got to the path he was headed for, so I don't ride him alone and I am cautious about which fields we use now.

Advice would be welcome on:
a) are both of our expectations on either side of the horse share realistic. I really want to pull my weight and don't mind working hard at all, but I also don't want to be taken advantage of.
b) am I being over cautious/anxious to be worried about the behavioural issues

and

c) do I work on the issues (if so, advice welcome !) and stick with it or bail? I love the horse, not so happy with the set up, but I don't want to be seen as work shy and I don't like to quit because something is difficult.

Many thanks, all!

 

[kayeandGin]

Hello! I'm new, having been lurking for some time, I decided to join properly and could use some advice.

Apologies this is long, I'm trying to add in the details I think might be helpful.

I picked up a horse share for 2-3 days a week recently at £27 per week. This seems about average for my area (North Midlands), with some the same cost with the horse in livery and some more expensive (also in livery) -this is a share not in livery, with the horse in an open field. I can't really find any comparable shares to make a direct comparison.

I'm not an advanced rider. I rode when I was young and then had a long gap away from lessons. I'm in my 30s now and picked up riding lessons again about a year ago. I can trot and canter well enough. I wanted a horse share to give me more consistent riding experience and opportunities to spend time building my confidence in handling horses beyond the riding school experience of having a horse handed to you tacked up and ready to go.

I'm very grateful for the opportunities my horse share has provided and love to spend time taking care of the horses, but I'm unsure of what reasonable expectations are on both sides in a horse share like this.

My horse share horse lives out year round in an open field without a stall with a companion horse. At present each time I go to the horses I'm down for around three hours and will clear the large field of poop (owner is keen on this being done each time one of us is down there, it's quite a job and often I'll fill at least two barrows, sometimes four), set out hay, put a new haynet in to soak or take it out to drain, sometimes feed mash and supplements, etc, depending on time of day, groom, treat any skin conditions or bites, put on fly spray, put fresh rugs etc on as needed and do exercises and stretches. I'll also help out with the companion horse sometimes, although he's not part of the share.

Out of the two or three days I go down, I don't always have access to tack, or someone to ride with (see below for more on this) so I'll get to ride once most weeks, sometimes twice if I'm really lucky.

Sometimes the owner will make it clear that they expect the above tasks (and some occasional additional ones like cleaning rugs or moving equipment) to be prioritised over riding and on some occasions the tone of the requests is rude and entitled, in my view (and will need to be dealt with if we're to continue to work together). I like to learn and work hard, but I do think the owner forgets I'm paying them and not the other way round, sometimes. There's also been requests to cover holidays and feed twice daily, etc, etc, without anything in return, not even waving that weeks fee or something.

In addition to some reservations about the amount of work I'm putting in at present, I also have some worries about the horse and his set up in terms of tack, etc. He's a big old boy, 21 year old ID, affectionate and sweet when I'm working with him on the ground and I've appreciated grooming and spending time with him to bond. However, he's extremely food driven when out on hacks and it's a lot of work to keep his head up and out of the verges. He's on the whole very placid and doesn't spook when out on the road, but he does have a history of bolting in fields when he spots a path he wants to follow, usually a very narrow one with low branches over, which is tricky on a tall horse! He's currently on a bitless bridle, apparently because of issues with behaviour when in a bridle after an overly harsh rider and former horse sharer had been riding him in a bit... The above issues worry me a little. He's good out on the road, but I've felt him gear up to start up into a possible bolt a couple of times when in a field with a narrow path leading off. On the one occasion he started to bolt with me, he wouldn't respond to me trying to turn him into a circle or use pulley rein (I'm not even sure if this works well in a side pull bitless, but had to try something quickly) and only stopped of his own accord to eat some tempting grass before he got to the path he was headed for, so I don't ride him alone and I am cautious about which fields we use now.

Advice would be welcome on:
a) are both of our expectations on either side of the horse share realistic. I really want to pull my weight and don't mind working hard at all, but I also don't want to be taken advantage of.
b) am I being over cautious/anxious to be worried about the behavioural issues

and

c) do I work on the issues (if so, advice welcome !) and stick with it or bail? I love the horse, not so happy with the set up, but I don't want to be seen as work shy and I don't like to quit because something is difficult.

Many thanks, all!

Oh my gosh. So much worng here. I also got back in to horses later on in life. I had a girl helping me one day a week with my 23 year laminitic prone horse who also lives out (on a track system). The girl helping me paid nothing. She would ride my horse for me, muck out and do the hay nets (low sugar/starch), top up water and give hard feed. I would never in a million years think it’s okay to take a lend of someone for my own gain which is exactly what your situation sounds like! Her expectations are ludicrous ! It should be stable duties OR financial contribution unless it’s obviously a high end horse. Then when you do get to ride it, it is badly behaved at times! She will know all this and clearly just cba!

 

[Rose24]

Sack it off OP.

1 - a sense of self-preservation is not lacking in determination or cowardly, it's essential sometimes and this sounds like one of those times.

2 - this person is taking the absolute P. It doesn't matter how good or experienced (or not) a rider you are, no-one deserves to be treated this way.

Just found out he's got a history of bucking riders off too, which I didn't know about... I think you're right. Thank you for your help.

 

[Rose24]

Oh my gosh. So much worng here. I also got back in to horses later on in life. I had a girl helping me one day a week with my 23 year laminitic prone horse who also lives out (on a track system). The girl helping me paid nothing. She would ride my horse for me, muck out and do the hay nets (low sugar/starch), top up water and give hard feed. I would never in a million years think it’s okay to take a lend of someone for my own gain which is exactly what your situation sounds like! Her expectations are ludicrous ! It should be stable duties OR financial contribution unless it’s obviously a high end horse. Then when you do get to ride it, it is badly behaved at times! She will know all this and clearly just cba!

This is really helpful. I don't feel like I have a huge amount to offer as I'm not an experienced rider, but I am consistent and willing and was up front about my experience. Hopefully someone out there will be a better fit. Will miss the big boy though. Not his fault that he hasn't had the best training and input.

 

[Rose24]

Thanks everyone for your help, it is so very much appreciated. My plan is to pull out of the share. Some important lessons learned for the future. Asking specifically about bucking, bolting and taking off, and any other risky behaviours, etc, is important. I asked about quirks and spookiness, but not these other issues, which have come to light a number of months after the fact... Getting a written agreement and maybe putting out an ad to detail exactly what I'm looking for, where my skill level is at and what I'm able to offer.