advice please what would you do?

fushia

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I really feel stuck in a hole right now, long and complicated

A good friend brought two ponies, in poor condition, and rented a couple of stables from me. all started off well, ponies started putting on condition and looking better, one was already well handled other was nervous, but with daily work was coming around quickly.

then her o/h lost his job. and i said she could not pay rent on stables and just by there hay and feed, in exchange for the odd job. but she has stopped coming up. other than to drop passports up, i have not seen her at yard since before xmas.

I phoned her to talk about what to do with ponies suggesting selling one and giving other to experinced home to continue his education. to find out she still owes money on them. i have hopefully found a home for one, to cover the money owing, but what do i do with the nervous chap who she still owes £350 on.

I'm really struggling having the extra mouth to feed and have had to cut out most his hard feed, and he is mainly just on haylege. although not as poor as he was, he still needs the extra. i dont have the time to handle him daily, we really dont get on and see eye to eye, and his education is going backwards. how am i going to get him in the right home and get her money back, in an experinced home he is going to be a cracking pony. but he knows in nervous of anything over 12hh and we are boucing off each other. its really not fair on him.

I feel completly stuck, my friend cant pay off the money without selling him, previous owner wont take him back, said she will wait for him to be sold (dont think he would be good for him to go back anyway) but i cant carry on with things as they are. and without handling and more condition on him, i dont see how i can advertise him. if i had a space £350 i would give it to her and find him the right home. but i dont.

guess this has turned into more of a rant than anything. as i really cant see a way out of the situation
 
Tell your friend, in words of one syllable, to get her arffff up to your yard and get the poor lad sorted.

If you're able to provide him with shelter and some forage whilst she does so then that is good of you. If you can't then your friend is going to have to call the vet.

Sorry if that is blunt, but unless you've turned into a charity overnight or she is usually the bestest friend in the whole wide world and has saved your life on at least one occassion, then she has no right to put you in this predicament.
 
Tell your friend, in words of one syllable, to get her arffff up to your yard and get the poor lad sorted.

If you're able to provide him with shelter and some forage whilst she does so then that is good of you. If you can't then your friend is going to have to call the vet.

Sorry if that is blunt, but unless you've turned into a charity overnight or she is usually the bestest friend in the whole wide world and has saved your life on at least one occassion, then she has no right to put you in this predicament.

This basically.

Her O/H lost his job .. she didnt lose her legs so there is no reason she cant get up to the yard and sort out her own mess.
 
Blimey you have been dumped on. However, your friend needs to pull herself together and sort it out. Even if she can't pay the rent she can still get up and handle the pony and sort out his future and not just dump her life on you. Sure we all get in a pickle sometimes but sounds like she has just given up.

Can you drop by her house with a note of money owing to date and thrash it out with her? At the same time make a plan with the idea that she (not you) gets the pony moved on within one month?

Alternatively, give her the number of the local hunt to have pony pts, because you cannot afford to subsidise her horse habit any longer. (I wouldn't put pony to sleep btw :)) - might just drag her head out of the sand. Years ago, I turned up on someone's doorstep with stickers in my hand. When invited in I went round stickering her possessions to the value of the money owed (it was for tack she said she would pay me for) - miraculously I got my tack back.

Good luck, it isn't good enough that she has cut and run on you.
 
At a guess her otherhalf is home now & thats why shes not coming up, you may find hes putting pressure on her not to go to the yard......speaking from experience here. Also the longer she leaves it between visits the harder she will find it to come up. Is there also a chance the partner doesnt know she owns them maybe?
Your best bet is to call round & see her, lay your cards on the table & try & come up with a compromise that suits you both. Obviously both ponies need to be sold, to pay you back & pay the previous owner, she needs to come & sort them out, its in her interests to do it.
 
I had a pony abandoned with me, which ended up costing me an arm and a leg in vets bills. In the end, I served an abandonment notice on them (look them up on BHS website) giving them fourteen days to collect the pony and pay me the money owed, before I sold him to recoup my costs, or had him put down.

After nearly two years of not hearing from them, I finally got a phone call! They paid me what was owed and the pony now has a lovely home in a riding school.

If you serve an abandonment notice, and are in posession of the passport, if the owners don't respond within the fourteen day period, the pony is legally yours to do with what you will.

Good luck, it's a horrid situation to be in.
 
If they're not paid for, and you're worrying about selling them, contact the old owner and see if they will take them back - if your "friend" loses money, tough luck, she shouldn't bury her head in the sand and she should think a bit more next time.
 
IMHO she doesn't sound like much of a friend to me, passing on a debt to you and leaving you to it.
An abandonment notice (as above) might make her realise her responsibilities, if not they they are your ponies to do with as you wish - if you sell the 'ready to go' one would that give you a little cash to look after the other one and maybe get some help to get him to a 'saleable' condition?
The debt that she owes is her problem to deal with and not yours - I certainly wouldn't be selling them for her and handing over all the cash - at the very least I'd take out what is owed to you and sufficient to feed the second one
 
Poor you. I agree that maybe your friends OH doesn't know much/anything about them, and anyway he would not be in favour of spending any money on them. You have got to go and see her and just put it as above.

Sadly, ponies at a recent market were fetching £10 each. That is what the market is like with expensive food, wet weather and everyone cautious about spending.

Other than that - the kennels? Sad but maybe necessary.
 
Tell your friend, in words of one syllable, to get her arffff up to your yard and get the poor lad sorted.

If you're able to provide him with shelter and some forage whilst she does so then that is good of you. If you can't then your friend is going to have to call the vet.

Sorry if that is blunt, but unless you've turned into a charity overnight or she is usually the bestest friend in the whole wide world and has saved your life on at least one occassion, then she has no right to put you in this predicament.

Well put.
 
thank you all for your advice, have spoken to her again today, and apparently cant come to the yard as have taken there car off the road.
I am going to advertise him to hopefully get the £350 not worried about covering my costs. just need him in the right home (think i'm too soft) as soon as possible for mine and his benifit. just hoping someone will want a project and willing to have him as he is. he is going to go far in the right hands showing/dressage pony. just to big for me to handle (well he is big to me he is only 13.2hh-14hh)
 
thank you all for your advice, have spoken to her again today, and apparently cant come to the yard as have taken there car off the road.
I am going to advertise him to hopefully get the £350 not worried about covering my costs. just need him in the right home (think i'm too soft) as soon as possible for mine and his benifit. just hoping someone will want a project and willing to have him as he is. he is going to go far in the right hands showing/dressage pony. just to big for me to handle (well he is big to me he is only 13.2hh-14hh)

Isn't it a bit risky selling him when you don't own him and haven't informed his owner - wether that be your friend or the person she owes money to, also where is his passport ?

I would follow the abandonment notice as advised by another poster before advertising him.
 
i have his passport, i have disscussed with owner and previous owner and both are happy with this. previous owner not worried as long as she gets her £350, she doesnt care what or where he goes. owner has said she is happy for me to sell him on her behalf. so no different to something being sent away on sales livery.
 
i have his passport, i have disscussed with owner and previous owner and both are happy with this. previous owner not worried as long as she gets her £350, she doesnt care what or where he goes. owner has said she is happy for me to sell him on her behalf. so no different to something being sent away on sales livery.

Might be worth getting in writing just incase , if her oh has lost his job money might be tight. If they think you might have made a penny in the pony they might decided to get "what is theirs". Hope you can sell him quickly and get back to normal :)
 
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