Advice required

BASDCS

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Last year my mare was out on longterm loan. Every month, OH took his horse over and went out for a hack with loaner. Both horses were pleased and excited to see each other but after hack, went back to field/lorry quite calmly. My mare returned home after loan ended. This spring she died while OH’s horse was away for schooling.
I am not sure how horses handle death and if he knows she is dead. As I have been ill for several years, my mare went out on loan on several occasions, for various lengths of time. Both horses seemed quite happy apart but each reunion was accompanied by excitement, flirting, lots of mutual grooming etc until their normal laidback relationship resumed.
My mare was the boss mare and the other horses at the yard still stand at the gate and whinny when we return in the lorry with OH’s horse, as if they hope my mare will be there too. They all showed some disturbance of their normal behaviour for a few days after her death.
My question is: the yard my mare was at is having a fundraising Christmas show. If we go, do you think OH’s horse will expect to see my mare there and become upset?
 
I had a strong bond with my first pony. He used to whinney whenever he saw me, do tricks etc.

I sold him and went to visit 3 weeks later. He ignored me and refused to do tricks or anything...much more interested in new owner.

I do not think horses have emotions like humans. They are horses..they dont thing "oooh I wonder if neddy will be there" or "Where is dobbin"

Just go and be relaxed and calm and dont think about it, becasue I doubt she will.
 
I think a Horse:Horse relationship would be different to a Human:Horse relationship scrooge- although i cannot be completely sure because im not a horse.

In regard to whether your OH's horse would be upset, i have no idea im afraid you can but try.. but id imagine they get used to it just like everything else.
 
Horses definitely grieve for one they had a close bond with who has died. My friend is convinced that her horse still looks for and misses his field mate who died over 2 years ago. But we have to move on and so does your OH's horse. My advice would be to behave as normal and include the horse in what you are doing.
Good luck.

www.petsinmemoriam.co.uk
 
Its a horse! You think hes going to be telling all his mates in the field that next time he goes out his girl-friends coming to because they have arranged a date?
 
I dont agree with that at all- When Flint was turned out without his best pal , even though the field was full of horses- he was extremely upset and distressed, woudnt eat, screaming until the other horse joined him. I think if his pal had of died I do believe he would of been quite upset at the lack of a friend
 
Im not saying they dont grieve, but if the horse has been away for schooling and he hasnt seen her atal for a while then hes not going to care is he, he doesnt know shes dead, the other horses in the field havnt had this conversation with him.
 
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Its not like they were field companions...the horse was at a different yard!

Thankyou! Finally, someone sane who doesnt think theyre horse keeps a diary!
 
They had been apart! How can the horse realise the other one is dead? How can it miss her when its already been away from her for ages and has probably nearly forgotten about her existence anyway?
 
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Its a horse! You think hes going to be telling all his mates in the field that next time he goes out his girl-friends coming to because they have arranged a date?

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that was sensitive- pratt
 
Without doubt horses recognise people, things and places but as far as expecting something or waiting for something it is generally a learned response so something as random as a yearly event I very much doubt they will expect to see something.

When one of our youngsters broke its leg in the field our vet told us to keep the other youngsters by her side until the moment she was put to sleep when they were led away. The vet then told us to leave Poppy in the field for the others to see what had happened and say goodbye. It was areally sad day - especially to see how upset one of the youngsters was at losing Poppy but within an hour they had moved away and Poppy's body was removed. They definitely grieved but not in human response.
 
this person is obviously very worried about her horse will react.........your opinions are your opinions but please can someone show some ruddy sympathy and stop being so insensitive!

BASDCS i think your horse will be fine...........yes he might be expecting to see the other mare because if thats what he knows then he will expect it. however i think perhaps you need to stop thinking about it yourself and go out to have fun......it will probably rub off on your horse
 
BASDCS I agree with jenbleep. Your horse has probably associated this farm with the mare, and so might expect to see her when he arrives, but I don't expect it will upset him not to see her.

My friends horse can recognise the trailer of her best (horse) friend, and whinnys at it, but if the best friend isn't there, she just settles down.
 
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haha- is that because i am prettier than you are?!

No, its because you write in a very feminine way-are you gay? if u dont mind me asking?
 
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haha- is that because i am prettier than you are?!

No, its because you write in a very feminine way-are you gay? if u dont mind me asking?

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how exactly is that at all relevant?!



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Guys - you have hijacked a post and made it a personal slanging match. Someone has come on here genuinely looking for help and I would be quite upset if one of my posts ended up being used in this way.
 
No problems - we were planning to go anyway. Just wondered if anyone had been through this before.
Not convinced they don't talk to each other though. Every horse that comes to yard is OK for two days then starts spooking in school "spooky corner", having been told ghost stories by all the other horses.
 
My boy was "best friends" with a mare in his field, when he was turned out he used to gallop across the field neighing at the top of his voice until he got to her. When she moved to a different yard he ran round and round the field looking for her, neighing for a while until he realised she wasn't there. A few weeks later we moved to the same yard and thought they would be happy to see each other but they both behaved as though they had never seen each other before and even now a year later they are not "friends" again.
 
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