After losing a horse/looking for a new friend

[soulfull]

I have started looking for a new horse. Although it is still very fresh too me I cannot be without one in my life and so the search begins

However the one thing that keeps worrying me is buying a horse that look similar to the lad I lost. Is this likely to be a problem??

It is odd because before Micah I didn't 'do' chestnuts at all. Now I really like them but can't decide whether if possible it would be best to go for something completely different, as much for me as my friends and family.

I know I may not get the choice, as the right horse may be any colour, but given the choice what should I do???


Advice please

 

[AmyMay]

Your new horse might be the same colour - but it won't be the same horse.

Go for the horse that appeals to you - don't set yourself any criteria other than what function the horse must serve etc.

Good girl, though. Back in the saddle ((((( ))))

 

[seoirse]

I was there not long ago and thought about this lots, probably too much. I lost my horse of 10 years last July after months of box rest and heartache. He was my horse of a lifetime without a doubt. He was a 15hh grey full connie. I'd never really been bothered about breeding before him but after losing him I decided I wanted another connie, no bothered about colour, but mostly they are grey anyway! I looked at a couple and just didn't get 'that' feeling about them so didn't go any further. I was beginning to wonder if perhaps I needed to start looking at other types, as perhaps I was limiting myself and it wasn't that fact that G was a connie that made him so special to me. Then I had a call from an old friend to say she was moving to Oz and would I consider looking after her boy for her. As it happens he is connie x tb and also, utterly by coincedence, is G's cousin. Long story short I went to see him, love at first sight, and I've got him, I adore him and we're having a great time getting to know one another. Lots of people mistake him for G. The saddler came last night and hadn't heard that I'd lost G and then felt really bad for mistaking new boy him - poor man! Thing is, even though other people think new boy looks like G, I hardly see any resemblance, as when you know a horse so well you know all the little things about them that make them special and therefore totally and completely different from any other.

So, don't rush into getting something else, but start looking, enjoy going and seeing things (I love seeing other peoples yards and set ups too!) and don't worry if you don't really gel with anything to start with. Go and see things that appeal to you from the advert, or are recommended etc. When you meet the right horse you will know! Good luck. It is hard, I still miss G like mad and have days when I am so sad that it's not him I'm going to ride, but equally I am so grateful to have another wonderful horse to love and enjoy. xx

 

[SmartieBean09]

I'm in a similar position. Jamin was my horse of a lifetime and I still don't believe I could love another quite as much as I loved her. I still have days where I fall to pieces, but like you I need to be around horses. It's been 15 months and I miss the horses terribly. I have been offered a loan pony who seems perfect and as odd as may sound, I'm happy that it is a loan pony because in the back of my mind i know it will never be mine and therefore the last pony who was mine was Jamin. I did go through a stage where I thought I would never feel ok about getting another because there would never be another like Jamin but as time has progressed I know that I was blessed to have found Jamin and that horses are like people. We can love friends just as much as family and they all have a place in our hearts.......Jamins place is just a huge bit of mine

 

[nikicb]

Firstly I'll send hugs. Having gone through this very recently I know that it is quite an emotional rollercoaster you are going through. I lost my girl at the beginning of April and was very lucky to find another horse very quickly.

My new horse is very very different to my old girl. For me I didn't want another bay, especially not another bay mare. I don't know why really, not sure if it was because after 30 years I wanted a change, or because that way it didn't feel like replacing her but starting a new venture. I mentally skipped over any bay in the adverts I looked at. One thing I do know is that my new horse is totally the right one for me and that is all that matters really.

I do still get a bit tearful and emotional - I think it's just the massive highs and lows, but onwards and upwards. Good luck with your search. xx

 

[KVH]

Nothing useful to add, other than to say I am going through the same as you, and it is terribly hard, but the right thing to do.
Just to wish you luck in your search.

 

[wyrdsister]

I wouldn't worry too much about looks to be honest, all of mine look completely different (yellow gelding, small bay mare, huge chestnut mare and ginormous spotty filly)! I have noticed that I tend to end up with similar personality types, though. They're all ultimately sweethearts who will do anything for me, but they've all got a strong alpha/quirky streak, a bit of brattitude, and a tendency to prefer to be kept thinking. It bothered me a bit to start with - and it took me a long time to get past the fact that the orange horse isn't the little brown one, who broke my heart when she had to be retired early. But in the end I think I came to the conclusion it doesn't much matter even if they are similar in some ways. They're not 'exactly the same' and if you like something or a particular personality type seems to work for you, then it's no bad thing to stick with it.