age 60 would you stop competing bs

confusedmum

confusedmum

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just lost my horse of a lifetime after a long battle with canker and turned 60 in the same week
I don't know what to do utterly bereft desperately missing him but still contemplating carrying on why ? I have no idea i'm skint im tired my horse was incredibly labour intensive more than usual !! and im heartbroken so why the hell am I thinking of carrying on
im the oldest person ive ever seen in the ring would love to know who else is out there I have severe spinal injuries and begged to be allowed to carry on for another year that was 3 years ago !! but the thought of stopping terrifies me
I have got as far as selling lorry but still got all my tack etc and if im honest no amount of money could ever replace the horse I had he was so very honest and kind

would love to know other peoples stories
 
so sorry about your horse, hope you can continue with horses a bit further down the road, i`m sure there is lots of people older than you riding, the queen for example, and our farrier competes bs and he is over 60.

take care xx
 
I'm not the ideal person to reply to this, but your post tugged on my heartstrings.

The time to give up is surely when you stop enjoying it or don't want to do it any more. You say you are terrified at the thought of stopping. That's a curious word to use - do you know what scares you so much about the idea?
 
Definitely not, you are not old! If you still want to do it, go for it! I look at people older than me and think - I hope I'm still doing this at their age!
Round here they are still hunting and team chasing in their 70's and one old boy is 80!
So sorry about your horse, it's heartbreaking when you lose a special friend.
 
Sorry for your loss. I think you should stop when you no longer enjoy it and not a second before. You're only here once!
 
Somewhere out there is a young horse who desperately needs a kind and sensitive person . Dont let him/her down by hanging up your boots just when you are starting to know about horses .(I can say this at 61)After a life changing fall a few years ago ,I am now back jumping .(OK its only a tuesday night lesson at my local BHS riding centre . My instructor ( slightly older than myself ,was in pony club with me ) has demonstrated that I still have an awful lot to learn even after 50 odd years in the saddle. Age ,its a strange thing, we still feel 18 ,it just hurts more! The kids training there have no idea of how many top level classes she has won on quirky difficult horses that they couldn't ride one leg of. 60 is the new 40 and who gives up at 40 !
 
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You don't need to give up if it's what gives you so much pleasure. As someone else said if you no longer enjoy then give up, whatever age you are. I'm sure you must have a horse shaped hole in your life.
There are two ladies at my yard who are in their 70's, one of them still competes at dressage. I'm in my late 40's and love seeing ladies older than myself still riding, spurs me on.Go for it!
 
I'm 70 next year but didn't really start riding until I was 50 so was a very late starter. I have bought new horses at 50, 60 and my present one at 65. I don't jump these days as it hurts my back and present horse isn't keen either but we school at med, adv med level now which is the first time I've managed to reach this standard and it is so much fun! I intend to keep going for as long as I am physically capable because I enjoy it so much. Only you can balance the pleasure you get from riding against the cost etc but I'm sure there is a horse out there with your name on it if you want to start looking. Good luck, whatever you decide.
 
Magnetic Sparrow said:
I'm not the ideal person to reply to this, but your post tugged on my heartstrings.

The time to give up is surely when you stop enjoying it or don't want to do it any more. You say you are terrified at the thought of stopping. That's a curious word to use - do you know what scares you so much about the idea?
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not having horses that's what terrifies me !!
made a home made quiche and did the housework yesterday OMG what is happening to me ?? the thought of being like this forever is truly truly terrifying next thing you know ill be getting dressed up to go to sainsburys shopping on a saturday and browsing the aisles like a normal person not caked in horse poo, getting a ready meal because I haven't got time to cook like I usually do
some amazing comments on here !! really cheered me up thanks !
 
I have a friend who is in her late '70's. She has back problems and doesn't jump. All her family want her to give up keeping her little horse. Horses have been part of her life since she was a child and she has no intention of giving up and spending her days doing housework!
Give yourself some time to grieve and consider all your options before 'burning all your bridges'.
Good luck.
 
You shouldn't give up anything while you're still enjoying it, quite the opposite.

Just be aware that you won't know a new horse like you knew your previous horse and might not be as confident for a while. I'm in my 40's and that was the biggest thing I found. It's horrible when you suddenly realise that the confidence came from your partnership and you need to start on that process all over again.

Being active keeps you young so do whatever makes you happy and stick two fingers up to the people who don't think you should.
 
meleeka said:
You shouldn't give up anything while you're still enjoying it, quite the opposite.

Just be aware that you won't know a new horse like you knew your previous horse and might not be as confident for a while. I'm in my 40's and that was the biggest thing I found. It's horrible when you suddenly realise that the confidence came from your partnership and you need to start on that process all over again.

Being active keeps you young so do whatever makes you happy and stick two fingers up to the people who don't think you should.
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That's exactly the problem we had such an awesome bond he got me out of trouble so many times I know it would take a long time to get that with another horse.I trusted him completely to a fence off whatever stride or turn ,!! I` ve been so incredibly lucky to have him but I feel so torn about what to do I'm not sure if it's fair on anyone including poor cash strapped food deprived hubby to try and replace him but just don't know if I can give up I am such am idiot my head tells Me to be grateful for what I've had and stop there is life outside the ring but my heart is screaming to jump again I'm not an easy person to live with at the moment !!!
 
I have just started riding at the beginning of the year and have just turned 63 this month...The body is not as flexible as it used to be but I'll keep going as long as I am able . It is the best thing I have done as not only is it good for the body it does the mind a world of good too.. Keep doing what you love and give yourself time to grieve the loss of your wonderful horse.

Shirl
 
I am pushing 68 years old. I ride very day, I have to with youngsters to bring on. I haven't jumped for years but now have the courage to jump our Shagya stallion, who is a pussy cat, point and shoot, close your eyes if you want!! not more than 85cm.

I do share your pain, my first horse was pts aged 36 I had owned him for 20 years. It is hard to get over a loss like this but I would not give up.
 
i am 71 and lost my horse in september last year and decided to give up and live a normal life, i lasted 2 weeks, my house was spotless, dog had lots of long walks, car was cleaned and garden done.....i decided i couldnt have a meaningful life without a horse, so i took on a loan horse who is 19 and i hack out every day and feel much more settled. everything else takes a back seat apart from the dogs and i am happy again even though i still miss my nutty horse...you sound like you are not ready to give horses up yet, so listen to your heart...
 
confusedmum said:
That's exactly the problem we had such an awesome bond he got me out of trouble so many times I know it would take a long time to get that with another horse.I trusted him completely to a fence off whatever stride or turn ,!! I` ve been so incredibly lucky to have him but I feel so torn about what to do I'm not sure if it's fair on anyone including poor cash strapped food deprived hubby to try and replace him but just don't know if I can give up I am such am idiot my head tells Me to be grateful for what I've had and stop there is life outside the ring but my heart is screaming to jump again I'm not an easy person to live with at the moment !!!
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Then maybe lower your expectations. Aim for coming out of the ring having had a lovely day and not expect anything more. There's only one way to find out if it's not going to work out.
 
My dad's 65 and still competing BS. A friend's YO is still competing in her 70s.

If it's not fun any more, take a step back and reevaluate. There's nothing to say that you can't come back.
 
There's a whole lot of potential 'giving up's here - giving up competing, giving up having a horse of your own, giving up being involved with horses. You've just lost your horse of a lifetime so it is very early to start thinking about anything. Give yourself time to grieve - and don't dismiss the quiche making! I took up baking after loss of a pet and it helped me get through. Then think about what you miss, whether it is the smell of horse poo or having your own horse wicker at you or the adrenaline buzz of jumping or the thrill of competition. Whatever you do it is not going to be the same as with your old horse, but there are loads of options. if you want to carry on competing BS hell why not! but lots of other ways of avoiding housework that involve horses!!!
 
confusedmum said:
not having horses that's what terrifies me !!
made a home made quiche and did the housework yesterday OMG what is happening to me ?? the thought of being like this forever is truly truly terrifying next thing you know ill be getting dressed up to go to sainsburys shopping on a saturday and browsing the aisles like a normal person not caked in horse poo, getting a ready meal because I haven't got time to cook like I usually do
some amazing comments on here !! really cheered me up thanks !
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Doing housework? That really is terrifying.
60 isn't old these days. How old was Nick Skelton when he won gold in Rio?
 
My friend is 61 and has just bought herself her first lorry. Do it as long as you love it.

I specialise in working with older adults in ED, and we look at reablement. I see people in their 60s who have a much lower quality of life because they've decided they are old, then I see 90 year olds walking the dog and volunteering for charity. They tell me it keeps them young.

What I'm trying to say is do it for as long as you can while you still love it
 
I'm coming 60 in November and still competing BS on a spooky quirky warmblood. Sometimes i wonder if i should give it up and perhaps do dressage. But i love jumping,
the buzz when it all goes right is great. My hips ache but i can put up with that just for the jump. The only thing i struggle with is the early morning starts........
 
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