always had geldings, how will I like a mare?

[neddynesbitt]

Having always had boys I am going to view a mare and am worried by all the horror stories I've heard about mares. I like character and all my boys have been affectionate. Some have been quite cheeky but accepted being told off BUT I've been led to believe you have to treat mares differently and ask a mare and not tell her?

any help and advice welcome, thank you

 

[Pigeon]

I find I get on easier with geldings, and have always had geldings - only met one or two mares I've liked but they have been really special.

I guess in a way they are entire, like a stallion, where a gelding is not. And we all know girls are more intelligent!

 

[Spring Feather]

No horror stories here. I adore my mares, always have; in fact the only horses I've ever loved in my life have all been mares. Yes I'm very fond of my geldings but they're not the same, nothing comes close to the relationship I have with my mares. My mares would move mountains for me, and I for them. I have utter faith in my mares, they trust me totally, and the relationship we have is something that can't be explained; a bit like trying to describe how it feels to be a mother to a lady who's never had children I suspect. Mares need more and give more imo. Geldings are just happy with their lot regardless of their life; mares need nurturing and then once you have them, you'll have them forever.

Good luck :smile3:

 

[ivandenisovich10]

I was put off by a mare I had years ago I swore I would never have another. But about 4 weeks ago a mare came for sale on the yard where I am, I sat on her once and bought her there and then. In those 4 weeks to say our relationship is strong is an understatement, she is the most fantastic Horse I have keep come across and the bond between us already is amazing. I don't think there is anything we couldn't do together. My gelding is lovely but there is something really special about this mare we clicked and I've never been so excited about the future.

 

[Arniebear]

I think if you click with a mare then you are a force to be reckoned with, they an be truly amazing but if you dont click then it wont work! My last mare was full of attitude my sj instructor used to call her a b!tch cuz if you brought her in on a perfect stride she would say no, bring her in wrong and she would fly!! I had massive ups and downs with her, she reacted to me all the time so if i was in a bad mood she would be too and we would never get anything done, i loved her to piecec but was getting fed up of the inconsistency in competing if she felt like it she would win but if she didnt you may aswell have boxed up and gone home!! this time round i wanted an easier life and brought a gelding!!

 

[babymare]

No horror stories from me either. my Baby was a real sweetheart. not mareish at all. Just an amazing little mare

 

[Mahoganybay]

My daughter and I have always had mares, like other people have said once you click with a mare the bond is quite amazing. Daughters first pony was a mare, daughter was 8 years old and we had trouble with a capital T right from the start, attitude, naughtiness, stubbornness, then one day about a year in something clicked and from then on, my word what a team. Daughters second horse was a Arab mare, the most loving horse I have ever met.

My first horse, again a mare, school mistress, not very affectionate but taught us both to ride, never Mareish, just knew her job, my second horse, a mare was probably the most Mareish, difficult horse I have ever owned.

We bought the one & only gelding we have owned when my daughter changed from the Arab mare, she wanted something ready to compete, our boy came along and he has been the most chilled out lad, very lazy, a definite case of 'tell a gelding', he gives as much as you demand of him. My daughter loves him to bits but he frustrates her, poor lad.

However, she is now at Uni and he is my riding horse, perfect for me. He will stay with me forever and when my daughter is lucky enough to be in the position to afford her own horse, I know exactly what she will buy, a mare lol

 

[Polonaise]

I've just made the switch the other way, always had mares just got a gelding. Whilst they're all different in general I would say I have a partnership with my mares whereas I am in charge with the gelding. Not sure which is better, the gelding is far more reliant on me, cuddly and likes to know where I am, schooling is a far quicker process when the horses instinct is to obey rather then question. But I miss the partnership in some ways, the mares take responsibility for themselves, they have far more say in everything, if they want to go round that course and win they will regardless of what sort of form I'm on, if not god help me! My mare could either arrange a trip to A&E if I annoy her or save me from one if I miss a stride xc.
As for seasons, some don't even show, some turn into the devil and some become sweet as, I've got 1 mare who is much more effectionate and cooperative when in season.
So, if you like her go for it, you have to love them but they'll pay you back tenfold if you pick the right one.

 

[FireFly29]

I've had 3 mares, and 2 of them were also chestnut, and they've all been really sweet, genuine horses.
I've also known some pretty unpleasant geldings that would try and kick you with one end and tear chunks out of you at the other end!
I think you have to just try and view them with an open mind!

 

[Bobbly]

I've just bought a baby mare after many years of geldings, I fell for her photo and I'm glad I did. She is so trusting and is trying really hard for me and she's growing on me more and more.

 

[weebarney]

I've had both and I have to say my next horse will have to be a mare. my geldings are clingy, they don't like leaving home alone and they don't like being left on their own neither, my mares however, couldn't care less.

 

[Nudibranch]

I've owned both and seen examples of all kinds of behaviour in both! I really think it is about the individual not the gender. My horse of a lifetime was a mare and although grumpy and very much a one person horse, she would do anything for me.

Then again I had another mare who just loved everyone, a real people horse. Another mare was aloof and only wanted equine company. My current gelding is a bit daft and clumsy but loves attention. You can leave him on his own for hours and he'll just graze quite happily. My current mare is incredibly clingy and screams the place down when left on her own, but will hack out alone all day long.

I never have a preference - a bit like colour - it's the horse that counts, not the sex or coat genetics!

 

[Madam Min]

We've had 3 mares, the 2 we have now are very different, Chloe is a diva but if you get her on side she will try her very best for you, she's quite a one person horse. Amber is a total sweetheart, very willing, not at all mareish and quite submissive. My OH's old eventer Joyce was a fab horse, taught me so much after a 4 year break from riding but could be a horror when in season, sometimes when going in the stable, she try and pin you to the wall and wrap her head and neck round you, our current 2 show no major difference in behaviour when in season.

 

[SadKen]

I posted this very same thing about a month ago! I bought my mare after having a bad experience with the last one 20 years ago. This one is looooovely! She's a real doll, so cuddly and sweet, she calls to me when I go and see her (I think cos she wants food, but who cares, SHE CALLS TO ME!) and she's very easy to be around and to work with. She reminds me of my mum.

 

[Bernster]

I've owned both and seen examples of all kinds of behaviour in both! I really think it is about the individual not the gender.

I'd agree with this. Only a small sample in terms of the horses I've come across but I've seen a range of behaviours across mares and geldings, although there probably are some things that are seen more in mares than geldings and vice versa.

I've generally had geldings and they have been pretty straightforward, do as they are told types. I've now got a mare and she does have bags of personality, and I've really bonded with her in a way I hadn't with other horses.

Most people seem to think you get less and more from a mare, and mine has been the same. You know when she's not happy (not in a bad way, she just shows more emotion) and you know when she's enjoying herself. She's cuddlier and likes a fuss, which I love as haven't had that before.

But overall, if you click, then I'd go for it whatever the sex! Equal opps and all that

 

[Capriole]

I've always preferred my boys. But that's me. I don't really 'get' this sort of question. It's an individual animal you're talking about, you might like her, you might not. But that's not really anything to do with her sex really, it's about the animal and her character and whether you get on or not, not some silly preconceived sexist ideas about what other people think is better.

 

[pickwickayr]

Up until 5 years ago I always had geldings. Went thru pony club etc on geldings and so always looked for one if buying a new horse. However my first mare I bought cheap as a 2 year old to bring on and sell as a backed 4 year old. I stil have her and kept her as she is amazing! We have such a good bond, far more than any gelding I've had in the past, she is very intelligent, affectionate but also adores me and is not so keen on anyone else! She would jump anything I asked her too, she trusts me and I trust her I have 2 other mares as well now and they are both the same. Very friendly and affectionate and just seem really grateful for love and attention geldings I had previously resented the bathing, plaiting and endless grooming when competing but all my mares love the attention! All horses are different of course and you either seem to click or you don't. I do think personalities have a lot to do with it. Perhaps more quiet, sensitive people get on better with mares it is very true though that you don't tell a mare what to do, you ask her politely until she decides its a good idea!!

 

[Pipkin]

In theory I only buy mares (i have a colt but thats a different story lol) I don't and have never ever got on with geldings, I'm not a fan. OH bought a gelding and I can't gel with him, he's boring and has zero character, same for the majority geldings I've encountered.
All my girls have bags of character, full of affection and only one out of four is mareish.
Create a bond with a mare and she will go to the moon and back for you

 

[neddynesbitt]

Wow thank you for all the replies. We have 3 mares at our yard. One is no different in season but the other 2 are VERY marish when in season hence my question. Thanks again I will update once I've seen her x

 

[khalswitz]

I would say I'm generally a gelding person, but if it was a nice mare who ticked my boxes otherwise I'd got for it. Somehow, though, I see myself with a mare as a second horse rather than my only horse...

Agree with the comment about telling a gelding and asking a mare though... although you get exceptions, my gelding is definitely one to ask whereas my sister's mare was a teller!!

 

[Pebbles]

No horror stories here. I adore my mares, always have; in fact the only horses I've ever loved in my life have all been mares. Yes I'm very fond of my geldings but they're not the same, nothing comes close to the relationship I have with my mares. My mares would move mountains for me, and I for them. I have utter faith in my mares, they trust me totally, and the relationship we have is something that can't be explained; a bit like trying to describe how it feels to be a mother to a lady who's never had children I suspect. Mares need more and give more imo. Geldings are just happy with their lot regardless of their life; mares need nurturing and then once you have them, you'll have them forever.

Good luck :smile3:

^^ That^^

I have always loved the many mares in my life the best. The bond can be hard won as they tend to be far more aloof, IMO, which I actually respect!! Obviously you do want to check as far as you can that they aren't overly mareish but for most you learn to live with the odd fluctuations and I would highly recommond a mare - you certainly cannot beat a good one Happy hunting!! (Of course also good you have an excellent vet to hand to assist when the choice is made ;-)

 

[neddynesbitt]

^^ That^^

I have always loved the many mares in my life the best. The bond can be hard won as they tend to be far more aloof, IMO, which I actually respect!! Obviously you do want to check as far as you can that they aren't overly mareish but for most you learn to live with the odd fluctuations and I would highly recommond a mare - you certainly cannot beat a good one Happy hunting!! (Of course also good you have an excellent vet to hand to assist when the choice is made ;-)

Thank you Pebbles, I went and tried her today and she is just LOVELY I had a bit of a wobble re my riding ability as she went beautifully for her owner but didn't look like the same horse with me on board I'm going back on Sunday for a lesson on her which will be the decider. She's very sweet and I'm sure she has the right temperament but I want to make sure I will be good enough for her. The vet will be on hand to check her out thoroughly as after my latest experience I just CANNOT cope with anymore lameness My boy was reassessed today and is as lame now as he was when he first went lame at the beginning of August The vet has concluded that even if he were to come sound, it's unlikely that he will stand up to what I want to do and is better off to have the winter off and reassess. If he's sound then he could be a happy hacker as he's 100% safe and such a wonderful pony bless him. I feel so sad as he really is the perfect pony and the poor mare (if I get her) will have a lot to live upto xx

 

[Pebbles]

Ah, tough time but I'm sure you will follow your instincts and make the right decisions on both fronts. The lesson will be a great opportunity to see what you can achieve potentially, and as you well know takes a while to feel right together but all sounds very promising. Yes, she will have a very hard act to follow but onwards and upwards is the only way forward and fingers crossed for a less bumpy road this time!!! x

 

[Gazen]

They can be extremely grumpy but as had been said before, but the bond you develop with them as they become part of your herd is incredible. I think that with mares they like to be 'lead /top mare' and you have to earn their respect and trust so that she sees you as 'lead mare'.

 

[MiniMilton]

I personally don't like mares. The only horses that i've ridden that have tried to buck me off were mares! And they were usually quite successful at it.
I had one mare that was very quiet and non mareish, not at all spooky. But about twice a year she would have an absolute major broncing session for no apparent reason. I sold her and kept my little gelding who spooks a good bit but I know he'll never intentionally plant me.

Thats just my experience though. My friend has a chestnut mare that was a 2 star eventer but would also tolerate beginners. She never put a foot wrong all her life apart from giving a few grumpy looks

 

[Megibo]

Definitely a mare person... we have 4 now..

Mare number 4 we actually got from a dealer friend, went to see a gelding and came home with her instead lol :biggrin3:
My favourite mare will hopefully be going in foal next year, I'll be disappointed if she has a colt!

 

[wyrdsister]

Thank you Pebbles, I went and tried her today and she is just LOVELY I had a bit of a wobble re my riding ability as she went beautifully for her owner but didn't look like the same horse with me on board I'm going back on Sunday for a lesson on her which will be the decider. She's very sweet and I'm sure she has the right temperament but I want to make sure I will be good enough for her.

I *love* mares, have 3 at present, and the only gelding I really clicked with was an ex-stud stallion who still thought he was entire! (Had 16 years with him and no other gelding has compared!). Mine are a cheerful, willing, affectionate and quirky bunch. I even quite enjoy the random moody moments! So, yes, glad you went to see your potential mare and just remember: you've ridden her once, she won't instantly look the same as she did with her owner, who has presumably had her for months if not years! Hope your lesson goes well

 

[9tails]

I worship the ground my mare walks on, she's the most amazing and fun loving horse I've ever met. I believe she'll do pretty much anything for me, others not so much...

 

[joulsey]

Well Im definitely a mare person...normally the more neurotic the better! I agree with the other who have said once you get the bond its an exceptional one. All the geldings I have dealt with have been lovely...affectionate and friendly, but I have never felt a one on one bond like I have done with mares. My once in a life time horse was a chestnut TB who would do nothing for anybody bar me....and this is when I was 8 years old and she was 6.The same bond carried through till she died at 18. Even when she had her foal I was the only one allowed within 10 feet of them! Infact I remember they tried selling her at one point and they had to ask me to move away from the school cos she was trying to rear up each time she had to go past me. Still think about her everyday and Im 24 now!

 

[mynutmeg]

No horror stories here. I adore my mares, always have; in fact the only horses I've ever loved in my life have all been mares. Yes I'm very fond of my geldings but they're not the same, nothing comes close to the relationship I have with my mares. My mares would move mountains for me, and I for them. I have utter faith in my mares, they trust me totally, and the relationship we have is something that can't be explained; a bit like trying to describe how it feels to be a mother to a lady who's never had children I suspect. Mares need more and give more imo. Geldings are just happy with their lot regardless of their life; mares need nurturing and then once you have them, you'll have them forever.

Good luck :smile3:

Agree completely although I don't have as much experience. Have always got on ok with gleding but never truely clicked with one. Have has my mare for 5 years now and we would do anything for each other. She's very careful to look after me (whilst still challanging me) and is incredibly sweet with me - she can be grumpy to people she doesn't know or like tho. When she was ill last year I couldn't leave her stable as she got very upset, didn't matter if someone else was in there, I couldn't go. I think a lot of mares are one-person horses and you have to click and have a relationship with them but get one you do click with and they'll do anything for you.