Am i a bad owner or just have terrible luck?

Phoenix24

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Hi Everyone,
I'm new to the forum so if i have posted in the wrong place i'm sorry and please forgive some of the spelling mistakes. I'm desperate for advice as i have had an awful time since August 2014. I have had my friesian mare Phoenix since she was 6 months old, she has just turned nine and is simply amazing! I'm so proud of her. I brought a ex riding school horse called Hercules 7 years ago as a companion for her. He was the most kindest, wise horse you could wish for. He developed allergies to straw and hay which with careful management with the vets we kept it under control. Summer was the worse time for him but he was doing so well. In August 2014 i went down in the morning to give them their morning feed (they come in every night and go out in the day) and sadly found him dead in his stable, he was 20yrs. The vets thought it could of been an anurism. Devestated doesn't begin to discribe how i felt. Phoenix was suffering and missing him terribly, i had to make the difficult choice to find her a companion, i couldn't bare the thought of another horse in a way replacing him and seeing them in Herc's stable but in another way i couldn't bare Phoenix suffering and i couldn't let her down. We rescued a ex racehorse who suffers from abscesses but touchwood now hasn't had another since christmas and is looking really good and settled in fantastic, he is an amazing horse in his own right. Just after Christmas we went down again to do our normal routine about 8.30 am and found our beautiful little miniture shetland Marmite dead in his stable on his back by the door. He had banks but as fellow horse owners know by the door is almost impossible to keep banks up. He was such a big character in a tiny ponies body! He always showed off infront of Phoenix trying to get her attention. His mum holly is 23yrs and when we got them they we're rescue ponies who had been mistreated. We noticed Holly didn't walk properly and after a blood test found she has chrushings. She is one daily medication which controls it for her and she is such a calming spirit who i could cuddle for hours! Holly like Phoenix was suffering without Marmite and looked so lonely. We we're worried it may make her health worse and decided to find her a companion and found Marmalade. He was beautiful inside and out. My health hasn't been good and i've struggled with depression because of it. I'm 23 and have been told i may loose the use/feeling in my leg. I was struggling to get through the days and started spending loads of time with Marmalade, I would sit with him and he would graze around me and nudge my legs to make sure i was ok. He became my best friend and suddenly i didn't feel so lonely. Ever since loosing Herc's i find it hard to sleep, i check them all and give them a carrot before i go bed and check out my window all night if i hear anything. Last night i went down to check them and Marmalade didn't seem himself. He ate a piece of carrot but was spitting some out. I gave him some bute and i thought maybe it was his teeth so would get someone out in the morning to check but other then that he showed no symtoms. Mum went down early this morning and he was shaking and sweating, we got the vets out asap but he had to be put to sleep, he had colic. Saying i'm heartbroken doesn't begin to discribe the pain, i feel like it's all my fault. I dedicate my life to them and try to give them the best life possible but i feel like i've let them down and people will judge me for it. The vet said there has been so many cases and there is nothing we could of done but the horror of seeing my best friends, who i owe so much to so lifeless is haunting and i don't know what to do.
 
I feel for you, I also lost my pony 2 months ago to colic, would eat carrots and some hay but nothing else. :(

First of all, I think you need to slow down, by the sounds of it you have two now, the Ex-Racehorse and Phoenix? Make your life easier and stay with those two.. Next I would be checking the quality of my hay just incase - giving it a good smell and throwing any bales out that are at all mouldy..

Then, PLEASE go and see your doctor for stress and sleeping problems, by being tired you are going to get even more stressed about little things. xx

P.S - Who is Holly? Is that the Ex-Racer? And yes, this is the right section.. and you're not a bad owners - just bad luck!
 
A serious case of bad luck, found our girl at 22 dead but she never suffered and she was with her herd. The sunset on her and rose without her. We will never forget Emerald but we are blessed with 5 ponies each special in their own way. Agree doctor for stress. Sorry re the colic, it's a nightmare disease. Thoughts with you.
 
Thank you so much for your kind words, it means so much to me to hear someone say i'm not a bad owner as i feel like i have let them down. They are my world and keep me going. I'm so sorry for your loss, its such a shock and is truly heartbreaking to loose them. Holly is Marmite's mum, our other little miniture shetland who we rescued along with Marmite. They we're left in a field and never saw a vet or a farrier. Holly had a foal at 22 yrs just before we rescued them. She is a little fighter, the calmest, sweetest little girl who looks like a teddy bear! We keep control on her crushings with daily precend. Touch wood she is doing ok but after Marmalade was pts she went out into the paddock calling and looking for him, i feel awful for her. Dinarelli is our ex racehorse (i call him Dean for short) He has settled really well with us, i get lots of kisses from him and he has come on leaps and bounds. I've never seen any of our furry family put to sleep before, it was horrendous but in another way i relieved he was out of pain and not suffering anymore. It felt he had been here all our lives. To loose one is horrendous but three seems unbearable.
 
Thank you so much for your kind words, it means so much to me to hear someone say i'm not a bad owner as i feel like i have let them down. They are my world and keep me going. I'm so sorry for your loss, its such a shock and is truly heartbreaking to loose them. Holly is Marmite's mum, our other little miniture shetland who we rescued along with Marmite. They we're left in a field and never saw a vet or a farrier. Holly had a foal at 22 yrs just before we rescued them. She is a little fighter, the calmest, sweetest little girl who looks like a teddy bear! We keep control on her crushings with daily precend. Touch wood she is doing ok but after Marmalade was pts she went out into the paddock calling and looking for him, i feel awful for her. Dinarelli is our ex racehorse (i call him Dean for short) He has settled really well with us, i get lots of kisses from him and he has come on leaps and bounds. I've never seen any of our furry family put to sleep before, it was horrendous but in another way i relieved he was out of pain and not suffering anymore. It felt he had been here all our lives. To loose one is horrendous but three seems unbearable.

Okay so you have three, do you ride any of them? Do you have a friend / OH / sprog who could help you out on some days so you could have a rest? I agree, losing three is horrendous and I feel for you every step of the way. :(
 
oh my goodness, I am so sorry. You are definitely not a bad owner. I think often if you rescue these dear souls they are a little bit more likely to go suddenly, you don't know what physical and health stresses their early experiences have given them.

Sending you lots of hugs and hope you can get a decent night's sleep. x x
 
I use to ride Phoenix but unfortunatly i was told i can't continue to ride due to slipping 3 discs in my back and one is pressing on a nerve so waiting to be referred for an operation :-( I tried a spinal injection but it didn't work and continued to get worse. I tend to spend lots of time brushing them instead and sitting with them :-) My mum has been a huge help, the ponies are really my mum's and Phoenix and Dean are mine but we just treat them all like equal members of our family and feel so lucky to have the support of my mum. I drive myself mad with fear of losing them. Most of our animals are fairly elderly now. My dog Phoebe i've had since i was 12, she is now 11 and has had cancer but luckily i caught it early and she is like a puppy again! My cat sammy is now 13 and just after marmite died she was attacked by a fox, we rushed her to the vets and had stitches and now luckily has made a full recovery. I feel on the edge of my seat worrying about them all as their all i have.
I'm sorry i also meant to say about our hay - we had a bad batch a few years ago which we just chucked away as it was unusable (our normal supplier had run out so saw an advert in the local paper) Since then we get a small batch of hay in (normally the second cut so it's better for Holly who is prone to laminitis) which we get every 3 weeks and it's always really fresh and not at all dusty.
I wish i could figure out how to upload photos so i could show you them all!
 
It's just horses. They're very hard to take care of sometimes and you can do everything in your power but sometimes they just find ways to go without you. I feel like a bad owner sometimes if I think over all my horses but I know I'm not im just being down on myself and I suspect this is the case here too. Hope you feel better soon x
 
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