am i being unreasonable?

[Guinness]

just a bit of a vent really-i have just moved my horse to a friends yard (just a few stables at her house with me and her there) its GREAT i love it there BUT i feel a bit like im taking responsability for her horse too! im sure she doesnt mean it, shes just a bit dizzy but i dont know how to say anything to her without upsetting her?
her horse is on box rest at the mo, recovering from laminitis amongst other things but she keeps forgetting to call the vet to make arrangements to come and check her etc and i feel like if i dont do it then it will just get left (the vet has even taken to calling me instead of her as im the one who is always around!) i offer to muck out etc when at shes working which i dont mind doing at all, but her bed is a mess and she just keeps "forgetting" to buy new shavings for her, im tempted to buy some myself, but think she might take offence. it seems to me like her horse isnt her priority at the moment, but maybe im just being over-sensitive?

 

[the watcher]

Are you paying livery to her? It might be easier to just buy what is needed, keep a record and then deduct it from your bill at the end of the month instead of getting annoyed about it.

If you are not paying anything then it would not be unreasonable to expect you to do a certain amount of work around the yard in recompense, but if this is the case it should have been discussed.

 

[Guinness]

yes i am paying livery, it doesnt really annoy me doing the work (i actually quite enjoy it) im just worried that if i wasnt around then stuff wouldnt get done!

 

[Toby_Zaphod]

I think you have 2 issues here. One is the fact that you are needing to pay for things i.e. shavings for her horse which should be paid for & ordered by her. The other & move concerning point is that she has an ill horse & 'forgets' to call the vet out to check her.

You've said that she's 'dizzy'.....but being dizzy cannot be an excuse for failing to call the vet & to find that the vet is calling you instead of the owner says something in itself. I think that you certainly need to speak to her about the issues....the lack of shavings is a minor matter & easily resolved.....but the vet issue is important & she needs to take on responsibility of ownership & care more for her horse.

 

[Gentle_Warrior]

Stop offering and doing things for - I know it will be hard as the horse is the main priority, but you should not be calling the vet for her !!!!! I would NEVER expect anyone to do that for me - she is taken you for granted and sounds like the sort of person that if you do it a couple of times she will expect you to do it all the time.

xx

 

[rach1984horse]

GigglePig speaking from experience of being in this situation you need to talk to her. I own 2 ponies, pay livery for one and help out instead of paying my £10 a week for the other one. YO has 7 horses, 4 of these live in at nights.

It has got to the stage now that if I don't muck out no one does. She leaves them all week until I give in and do them. She turns them out in the morning, I usually bring them in at nights, if I haven't then she'll call to ask if I can. I even wash 3 ponies every Friday for showing on saturday, and pack her lorry.

I'm not saying your friend is purposely taking advantage like my YO is, however it may be best to have a word with her. What happens if you need to go away for a couple of days, would you be able to trust her to deal with your horse?

 

[Toby_Zaphod]

Highland Girl....you're in almost as bad a situation as Gigglepig. Would it not be better for you to pay the £10 per week for your other horse, that would actually be cheaper for you. You are doing far more that £10 of work for your YO !

 

[rach1984horse]

Toby if I could I would trust me... However YO needs the help a lot more than she needs the money. She also works full time.

Shall be all change this winter though. After 2 winters of absolute hell I am finally moving yards. Am starting a new job with a lot of shift work, so need to move somewhere where I have have assisted DIY livery just incase I need the help. Also somewhere with a school with lights so I can fit riding in around working.