Am I doing too much? Teaching youngsters manners?

[ItsJzo]

I only got my boy yesterday, he was bred by a breeder that didn't even know his real age as she breeds so many so the first part of his life wasn't great. He then went to a nice lady who I bought him from..

Today I gave him a bath and I walked him down the road and back (literally just round the corner!), but another lady that is at the yard I am at got a bit funny at the fact I refused to take his barging when I was bathing him, too begin with he was a bit scared (he is as bombproof as a 2 year old could ever be!), but then after about 5 minute he would only start barging and doing small bunnyhops if he had time too think, if he was distracted by food he would totally ignore being bathed (I had my part loaner with me as wasn't going to attempt his first bath alone!), so I knew it was him purely being naughty and I won't take it because in my eyes and my experience, when you treat them like they are constantly nervous, they get it in their head that is is okay to be naughty because we are just going to pet them and let them do it?

I know he has only been with me for one day, and its all new but he was in such a bad state, and his mane and tail were so greasy from never having a bath that he actually had wind knots and he kept getting them because the hair would stick together. So it had to be done, and he is 2 years and 2 months so not a yearling.

I said to the lady that I believe in being firm with them straight away because it stops them from developing habits that then have to be corrected, it means less work and a better understanding between horse and owner.

Am I wrong? Have I done too much too soon? He was absolutely fine when distracted, and when walked down the road he loved it! Took him just across the road where there is a big field, took him up there for a graze and to chill and see a few different things, then took him back. I don't think that is too much for a sturdy 2 year old gypsy cob?

She said she treats hers like pets, 1 is 4 years old, the other is 10 months, and they are both nice but badly mannered, they get very funny when they have food and whenever you go near them ,ears are right back!!

I don't know, guess part of me is ranting but the other part is wondering if maybe I did jump in too deep with him, he is a pet too me, and will be my lifelong best friend, but at the same time, he is a horse, has the potential too kill me, and I don't want him to realise that or develop bad habits, so I nip them in the bud before they progress!

-Edit- Just too add when telling him off, I didn't smack him, I just said No in a firm tone, and gave the leadrope a tug that was all.

 

[JFTDWS]

He's two, you gave him a bath, took him for a quick walk and demanded manners? (I'm summarising in case I've missed something in your op?)

I don't see the problem with that - and certainly I would not allow any horse to get away with being ill mannered - young, new or otherwise. Assuming you don't mean you were correcting the ill-manners by bashing him with a fence post, of course

 

[ItsJzo]

He's two, you gave him a bath, took him for a quick walk and demanded manners? (I'm summarising in case I've missed something in your op?)

I don't see the problem with that - and certainly I would not allow any horse to get away with being ill mannered - young, new or otherwise. Assuming you don't mean you were correcting the ill-manners by bashing him with a fence post, of course

You summed it up perfectly! I allowed him to fart around to begin with because at first he was nervous, and it is new surroundings, but if you take a horse too a show, you don't allow it too be naughty just because it's somewhere new do you? Manners should be an all the time thing!
The ONLY reason I eventually got a bit direct with him (Saying No and the tug on the rope) was when I knew he was not nervous, he was just being a tit!
I would NEVER punish him in any way or get angry with him if he was nervous as its common sense that this would just reinforce his reasons to be nervous.

 

[pookie]

I agree with JFTD and would add that, if it were me, I'd ignore advice on handling youngsters from someone whose own youngsters display bad manners. Your horse, you weren't abusing him just setting ground rules from the get-go...none of her damn business, frankly

 

[Gracie21]

Pffttt ignore her, stupid woman.

 

[Sophstar]

Nope not doing too much at all...friend rescued a yearling and has already bathed her making her stand still, taken her in the school and taught her to follow and not barge past, and is being led out whilst she rides her mare round the block (a good hour of walking) once or twice a week. Better to nip bad manners in the bud before they get any bigger or more dangerous!

 

[ItsJzo]

I agree with JFTD and would add that, if it were me, I'd ignore advice on handling youngsters from someone whose own youngsters display bad manners. Your horse, you weren't abusing him just setting ground rules from the get-go...none of her damn business, frankly

This is what I have basically said, I don't want him to begin to get away with bad manners because once youngsters learn these, they become nearly impossible to correct, I want him to learn his space and my space and basic ground manners before he gets any bigger and more to the point, stronger...

I just felt a bit guilty like maybe telling him off when it was his first ever bath was bad of me...I don't know!

 

[JFTDWS]

I'd ignore advice on handling youngsters from someone whose own youngsters display bad manners.

This too

I might even say next time she says anything "I'm just cracking down on it now - I would hate for him to end up like your ill-mannered pony"

 

[ItsJzo]

This too

I might even say next time she says anything "I'm just cracking down on it now - I would hate for him to end up like your ill-mannered pony"

Lol I don't think I would have the heart too say that, I did try too stand up for myself but I knew it was getting me nowhere.

I will never bring him too harm, but he really did need this bath and I wanted it over and done with, I couldn't stand seeing him in such a state anymore...

 

[kerrieberry2]

mine will be 2yrs and 2 months in about a week and he's had all that done to him! he was bath just with a bucket and sponge, which he wasn't too keen on but he always goes out for walks, has met lots of different scary things, so I don't think you are doing too much too soon, or if you are, then so am I! but my boy gets bored, he doesn't have any other youngesters to play with so he tries to play with my poor 27yr old, who just kicks him so he needs to be out doing something to keep his mind active!

I am proud of him as I have now managed to get him trotting in hand the last couple of days, until now, he just looked at me like I was a weirdo trying to run away from him!

 

[ItsJzo]

mine will be 2yrs and 2 months in about a week and he's had all that done to him! he was bath just with a bucket and sponge, which he wasn't too keen on but he always goes out for walks, has met lots of different scary things, so I don't think you are doing too much too soon, or if you are, then so am I! but my boy gets bored, he doesn't have any other youngesters to play with so he tries to play with my poor 27yr old, who just kicks him so he needs to be out doing something to keep his mind active!

I am proud of him as I have now managed to get him trotting in hand the last couple of days, until now, he just looked at me like I was a weirdo trying to run away from him!

I must have got lucky because Oreo absolutely love trotting in hand! If I could workout how to post a video up of him today I would, he even threw in a little buck, he gets very excited! Hes so much happier in himself now he is out keeping his mind active, I have only had him a day but I can see such a difference in him!

The lady that had him before was lovely, she did the best she could for him, she pretty much rescued him, she didn't have the space so he had to be kept on his own at her friends house, so he is really needy and he is enjoying the horsey company he has now..

 

[kerrieberry2]

I must have got lucky because Oreo absolutely love trotting in hand! If I could workout how to post a video up of him today I would, he even threw in a little buck, he gets very excited! Hes so much happier in himself now he is out keeping his mind active, I have only had him a day but I can see such a difference in him!

The lady that had him before was lovely, she did the best she could for him, she pretty much rescued him, she didn't have the space so he had to be kept on his own at her friends house, so he is really needy and he is enjoying the horsey company he has now..

Oh you are very lucky, I've had him since Feb and yesterday was the first time I managed to get him to trot in hand on my own! done it once before with my friend but he just looked confused the rest of the time haha! Was a night mare when he had an abscess and I needed to trot him up for the farrier! just didn't happen!

Sounds like you have got yourself a right little superstar, you will have to post some pics up soon!

Have you decided what you're going to do with him yet?

 

[LittleBlackMule]

Manners should be taught from day one, never mind waiting till they're two!

Sounds like you are being a very sensible mum

 

[Littlelegs]

I don't think its too much for a 2yr old at all. But if I'm entirely honest if he hadn't been handled much I would have left out the bathing for a few days at least. That said, its not up to someone else to pass unasked for comment on, especially if their own are bad mannered. I don't except bad manners at all but I do like to pick my battles & avoid conflict if there's an easier way. But I don't think that anyone who does it differently is wrong. But I agree allowing bad manners is wrong!

 

[ItsJzo]

Oh you are very lucky, I've had him since Feb and yesterday was the first time I managed to get him to trot in hand on my own! done it once before with my friend but he just looked confused the rest of the time haha! Was a night mare when he had an abscess and I needed to trot him up for the farrier! just didn't happen!

Sounds like you have got yourself a right little superstar, you will have to post some pics up soon!

Have you decided what you're going to do with him yet?

I want to do some jumping with him, bus his paces are surprisingly dressagey..(if that is a word!!)
He really is a superstar, I honestly honestly cannot fault him in any way other than general ground manners, he is as bombproof as a youngster could ever be, he is so perfect, if he is scared of anything rather than run away from it, he will investigate it, and that's it! After that he doesn't care! Main roads are the absolute least of his worries as I found out the yesterday when loading him!

Manners should be taught from day one, never mind waiting till they're two!

Sounds like you are being a very sensible mum

Thank you, I am trying to do the best I can...

I don't think its too much for a 2yr old at all. But if I'm entirely honest if he hadn't been handled much I would have left out the bathing for a few days at least. That said, its not up to someone else to pass unasked for comment on, especially if their own are bad mannered. I don't except bad manners at all but I do like to pick my battles & avoid conflict if there's an easier way. But I don't think that anyone who does it differently is wrong. But I agree allowing bad manners is wrong!

He has been handled but hasn't had anything actually done with him? He had been handled quite alot by the lady I bought him from but mainly for cuddles and the like rather than any learning if that makes sense, being lead wasn't in any way new too him, neither was being tied up...
I normally would have left it, but honestly it just annoyed me way too much, the fact that he kept getting windknots despite me keep pulling them apart, because his mane was so greasy. I took it slow and was very reassuring to him, I gave him a haylage net, a likit, treats and fresh watermelon (which he seems to love!!), I just wanted to get it over and done with because I also used fly repellant shampoo as the flies are REALLY bad where we are, and they were really bothering him (we are right by the river), so wanted to put something on him that had more substance than spray, as the spray didn't seem to have any effect.....

But I completely appreciate your point

 

[SusieT]

nope definitely right-hae him behaving the way you want to from the start.

 

[Feathered]

I completely agree, lay down boundaries from day one and you will both know where you stand.

Good luck he sounds like a lovely chap.

 

[ItsJzo]

Thanks everyone, at first I did think I was doing the right thing but then after I left I felt guilty so thought I may have overstepped the mark but I just want us to have as problem free relationship as we can because I really do love him more than anything already and it's only been a day!

Hes going to be a little superstar!

 

[dafthoss]

He's two, you gave him a bath, took him for a quick walk and demanded manners? (I'm summarising in case I've missed something in your op?)

I don't see the problem with that - and certainly I would not allow any horse to get away with being ill mannered - young, new or otherwise. Assuming you don't mean you were correcting the ill-manners by bashing him with a fence post, of course

Nope thats my job to do to you on sunday

OP nope I think its fine what you did, genuine fear I dont mind and have loads of time to deal with, rudeness has to stop there and then no discussion. Next time I'd just explain that you would rather he learned to be polite now than have him as a great big 4yo still trying to push you arround.

 

[Bikerchickone]

Better to straighten him out now than struggle when he's a hand or two taller and stronger! My youngster was 14.1 when I got her as a yearling and trying to teach her to pick her feet up would've been an awful lot easier if it had been done when she was younger and smaller!

I think you dealt with the situation perfectly well as it goes.

 

[staceyn]

I have a 10month old I take him on walks over motorway bridge twice a week and bath him ect . Ignore her there is nothing wrong with that. It gets your horse prepared for the future

 

[staceyn]

Oh and I used to take my 7month old on walks he used to love them got so excited doing him little trot in his tiny rug.

 

[Cortez]

FOALS should have manners, never mind 2 year olds. What's with the "poodle-ising" of horses nowadays? (poodles should have manners too)

 

[ItsJzo]

Well thats just it, he doesn't pick his feet up either, and too me for him to be 2 years and 2 months and still not pick up his feet without trying to job everywhere is a pain!
I can understand some of it is balance as he is young but my last youngster was picking up her feet at 11 months old, it's just something else I will work with.

And yes genuine fear I will never push or punish them, but what started as genuine fear after about 5 minutes turned too naughtiness!

I will do the best I can with him, he is not bargy in the sense of leading, you can lead him anywhere and he never overtakes or tries to take off (unless he is really excited as we found out today) but that wasn't him trying to take off, it was a little throw the head around with a bunny hop, but you can bring him back without any fighting atall, which I love about him.

I guess I just took it a bit too heart!

 

[Cortez]

Here's what I ask foals to do: lead, pick up all four feet, tie. Yearlings: lead, trot in hand, pick up feet, tie. Two year olds: lead, trot, feet, tie, load in trailer. Three year olds: all of the above + wear tack and lunge a teeny bit, rider to lean over and maybe sit up for 5 mins. Etc. It all heads to the end product of a mannerly, polite, safe, well broken and happy horse = happy owner, happy horse: home for life.

 

[Kallibear]

Insisting a 2yr old behaves themselves is only sensible. However I do think you pushed your luck althought you got away with it. You could have had a real battle on your hands and one you wouldn't win. Then you'd have ended up with a frightened, stressed youngster who you'd made bathing a 'issue' for.

Whilst you can't let them away with naughtiness you need to set him up for sucess and choose battles carefully. The day after he arrived, knows nothing about you (and doesn't know you well enough to trust you) and being made to do something he could potentially have found really frightened was a foolish thing to do.

Just to add when telling him off, I didn't smack him, I just said No in a firm tone, and gave the leadrope a tug that was all.

That is my absolulte pet hate for horse handling!!! What exactly do you hope to acheive by yanking down their headcollar? How does it fit in with anything they have learnt?! Most horses are trained to move when pressure is applied to their headcollar so you are punishing and hurting them for doing what they have been asked to do. If you want to punish him, slap him on the shoulder or chest, not his face!

 

[AengusOg]

The ONLY reason I eventually got a bit direct with him (Saying No and the tug on the rope) was when I knew he was not nervous, he was just being a tit!
.

Would you explain how you know that?

 

[ItsJzo]

Would you explain how you know that?

Because when he is nervous, as previous owner explained, and as I noticed straight away he goes rigid like most horses do and he is not interested in feed/treats etc, whereas after 5 minutes of just introducing the sponge to him and not soaking him with it, he settled, started munching and lazing, but every now and then if he stopped eating for a second (due to noise or the like), he would start prancing around....

And yes I can agree that when he didn't trust me yet, bathing him was a risk, and I see that now, but at the same time it can take a LONG time to gain trust, and he needed this bath, and I was careful enough in the sense that I didn't make any sudden movement or just throw the water at him, the bath took nearly an hour in total just to put the shampoo on as I took it very slow...

And as for the tug, it was an automatic reaction because he was bunnyhopping and I guess old habits stick because when I had lessons once upon a time, if a horse was to start acting a prat on the ground, a short sharp tug (Well timed) would tell them whatever it was they were doing was something bad, and they would think twice before doing it again.
I believe some of the Parelli trainers use the same methods (but much harsher, and no I am not sitting here saying I am a massive Parelli fan!)

I would NEVER hurt him ,and I didn't vigourously shake the lead rope at him I literally just tugged it and said no...

But I can understand where your coming from and will think more next time.

 

[Pale Rider]

Horses are full faculty learners from birth, they like lots of other species have to be. If they cannot gallop for a distance within an hour or so of birth they wouldn't last long.

They should be taught what you want them to know as soon as possible.

Ours stand to have a head collar on and off, can be tied, lead, give up their feet, bathed, wormed, whatever. Bought in foals at weaning, we have found a lot of bought in ones are not touched from birth! Home breds prior to weaning.

Leaving them, is I feel, plain irresponsible, asking for trouble and putting them at risk.

 

[ItsJzo]

Horses are full faculty learners from birth, they like lots of other species have to be. If they cannot gallop for a distance within an hour or so of birth they wouldn't last long.

They should be taught what you want them to know as soon as possible.

Ours stand to have a head collar on and off, can be tied, lead, give up their feet, bathed, wormed, whatever. Bought in foals at weaning, we have found a lot of bought in ones are not touched from birth! Home breds prior to weaning.

Leaving them, is I feel, plain irresponsible, asking for trouble and putting them at risk.

I totally agree with you there...especially since we choose to domesticate them, they need to be taught the basics just too survive otherwise people give up on them and they get sold from pillar to post...