Amusing things you hear on the yard

[Kellys Heroes]

Got me thinking the other day when I was on the yard. One of the girls had taken her dad down with her (a self confessed novice).
As she began to pick pony's feet out her dad says "have you got another of those (hoofpicks) I'll do his other ones"
Just had to laugh!!!

Give us your stories!
K x

 

[Cedars]

LOL! Thats hysterical!

 

[mulledwhine]

LOL, that is funny, and I cant beat that, although my dad did say today when we were buying stuff..

I thought horses lived outside and just ate grass if they can get it !!!!

I replied that is why my sister and I have horses and you dont, he is right, but if only it was that simple and cheap

 

[Kellys Heroes]

Oh yeah! we can dream...!!
I think he realised what he'd said after she patiently explained horses can't stand on two feet....xD
I've also seen people coming down to turn out their OH's horses - and putting the headcollar on upside down, so the 'attachy bit' (??? LOL talk about novices...!) is on their noses.. and the buckle is fastened under their chin!
K x

ETA in no way poking fun at novices....we all have to learn and all made mistakes - a fave of mine was forgetting to do the girth, and coming back onto the yard, clinging onto ponys neck as pony trotted along probably thinking "what the **** is she doing, get her off me!" - its just that once we've explained whatever it is, we do have a giggle about it

 

[*Spider*]

My horse frequently rests one his hinds while I pick out a front. Farrier finds it most annoying also, when he loses his balance (on two legs) and nearly falls over. Daft pony.

 

[Cedars]

I did have a girl at school ask me once how horses put their coats on when it rained....

 

[unicornleather]

lol

 

[Kellys Heroes]

I did have a girl at school ask me once how horses put their coats on when it rained....

Lmao brilliant. Then again wouldn't put it past Kelly. She manages to get her rugs off fully fastened alright!!
K x

 

[Kellys Heroes]

*bump*

 

[skint1]

Well not as funny as yours but just yesterday I was having lunch with my dad and he asked what my daughter was doing and I said

"Oh she's having a riding lesson then doing blahh blah"

He says "Riding lesson?! If she doesnn't know how to ride a horse after all these years she should get another hobby"

 

[*Spider*]

My Dad refers to Obie's rugs as jackets/macs.
My Mum also came with me to look around the local saddlery and said I should be buying so many fancy shoes for Obie to wear?!?!?

 

[NicoleS_007]

I work at a RS and must admit i have accidently sent out ponys with no sturrips or girths a couple of times Very embarrassing lol ... Theres also someone who keeps putting one of the horses rugs on inside out!! How the heck can they not notice its the wrong way!! ... When my horse got pts because of a severely fractured pasturn my mother said "Is he ok surely they can fix him!!" hmmmm no mother!! She is a bit of a numty when it comes to animals, bless her. Oh and my wee sister once told a friend that if she touched the inside of her horses ear it would die!!! Friend believed her lol i kindly informed her it was not true ... after much laughter

 

[elsiex]

Lol my other half does come out with some gems.

Refers to rugs as cloaks, and haynets as "balls of hay". Also has a habit of watching me ride going "how are you getting her to go faster, you aren't doing anything!!".

Also assumed that when walking a SJ course, you memorised it, then taught it to the horse!! If only!!

 

[jokadoka]

Having had horses for more years than i care to remember, my husband still asks me when I'm tacking up "When are you going to put his "chair" on".......

 

[Achinghips]

"What a lovely Tb you have. I do like the chestnuts, she would be perfect for my 12 year old"

 

[hannah87]

I was away for a night in the Autumn and left my OH to check on my mare. She needed her rug on at night and off during the day - I told him this and to tie her up to the string on the gate whilst he does it. I got a text saying " Bramble has her rain coat on, she kept wandering off so I tied her to the fence with a double knot, oh and she doesnt like the hay" - he had given her straw and tied her straight to the wire fence (OMG!!) but managed to put her rug on perfect!

 

[ClobellsandBaubles]

used to help with kids lessons at RS few years back still remember some of the claasics for example:
have any of these ponies laid any eggs?
have any of these ponies been into space?
or i want the orange one!
also explaining the difference between male and female ponies and then onto gelding got quite interesting thems were the days lol
have also seen 2 kids try and pick out a ponies feet at the same time poor little pony got a bit confused but did try bless him

 

[dafthoss]

my mum calls rugs blankets In the tack shop yesterday she asked what the big flap on that was then I told her it was a stud girth and explained it but then I had to show her what studs were as well.

 

[Topstripe]

I work as an Equine Underwriter and was in meeting with our Insurers quite a few years ago and the guy that was supposedly doing an audit on my scheme said to me

"OOOOO I am so worried about this scheme - I think it has been underwritten completely wrong - most of the policies I have reviewed I have had to pull up because the horses don't live at the postal address - we can't be having horses living somewhere different to the Proposer!!!!"

WTF - I was so shocked I just stood there like a goldfish until I burst out into laughter
I then asked him how many horses does he normally see in peoples back gardens LOL LOL LOL eating the flowers!
I explained about people keeping horses in livery and he then understood but i must admit I did wonder how they can audit the scheme without any idea of horses.

Luckily over the years it has changed!!!

 

[Chestnut mare]

Well not as funny as yours but just yesterday I was having lunch with my dad and he asked what my daughter was doing and I said

"Oh she's having a riding lesson then doing blahh blah"

He says "Riding lesson?! If she doesnn't know how to ride a horse after all these years she should get another hobby"

My OH says the same thing when I want a lesson lol he said I ride everyday I must kno how to do it by now!

 

[mik]

We had a lady come to ride at the school, all new gear on, and we asked politely if she had any experience, thinking new gear, novice. She said yes she was very experienced, then we politely helped her put her chaps on the right legs and gently persuaded her she didn't need long (upside down) dressage spurs, on the horse she was riding today, needless to say we learn't how to go into wallk, stop and turn that day.....

 

[MrsMozart]

We had a lady come to ride at the school, all new gear on, and we asked politely if she had any experience, thinking new gear, novice. She said yes she was very experienced, then we politely helped her put her chaps on the right legs and gently persuaded her she didn't need long (upside down) dressage spurs, on the horse she was riding today, needless to say we learn't how to go into wallk, stop and turn that day.....

That made me giggle

Well done on being so gentle with her

 

[caitlineloise]

We had a lady come to ride at the school, all new gear on, and we asked politely if she had any experience, thinking new gear, novice. She said yes she was very experienced, then we politely helped her put her chaps on the right legs and gently persuaded her she didn't need long (upside down) dressage spurs, on the horse she was riding today, needless to say we learn't how to go into wallk, stop and turn that day.....

Must admit I once went to a riding lesson with my chaps on the wrong legs! But I can ride (In a fashion)

I absolutely p'eed myself when I realised, as did my mother. This was after the lesson was over and was at home however, whoops!!

 

[Bettyboo222]

When I very first started looking after B, I had to get someone to show me how to do a rug up

The RS ponies arn't rugged .....

 

[3~2~1]

"do you think she'll be ok to ride out on, her front shoes have fallen off but she's got both backs on so should be balanced" !!!!!!! dohhh and this person really wasn't having a laugh ................

 

[wildwoman666]

I took other half to help me as had to do my friends horse . Got them in and was brushing my friends and other half was doing my horse. He says to me there is a hard dirty spot that wont come off on my girls inside legs ( chestnut) as he walks over to me and my friends horse and says he has them to. I say its there chestnuts not mud. He then looks at horse and says ,but he aint chestnut.....pmsl my horse is..

 

[mhorses]

yeah well one dad at the yard tacked up hisd daughters pony and the saddle was put on back to front and she only realised when her foot was in the stirrup ready to mount and then she took a fit and yelled abuse at him!! lol

 

[Vikki89]

Lmao brilliant. Then again wouldn't put it past Kelly. She manages to get her rugs off fully fastened alright!!
K x

I know of two horses who manage to get their rugs off un-ripped and all done up still, I still haven't really figured out how.

Many people I know who don't know about horses call rugs coats and they often ask me why I have/need lessons as I surely know how to ride so know everything.

 

[SonnysHumanSlave]

Yesterday I yard owners dad said "Them two grey horses look happy together."

Then realised 2 grey horses is Mare and gelding, that have broken fence to get in together, and normally we only turnout horses on their own. :s

 

[Ginge Crosby]

in trying to save me some money and save him from mowing his football pitch, my OH's dad said to me just last night:

"if i parked your horsebox on the pitch (he owns by their pub) you could move him up here and he could use the horsebox as his stable....."

i had to explain to him that my horse doesnt like going on the horsebox at the best of times, and would probably prefer to shiver his little TB socks off outside in the rain than venture up the steep ramp of my box on his own. Plus i dont think his football club would appreciate breaking ankles on the divots from his hoof prints. and i think he's under the impression that the horse would dig himself a latrine in the corner of the field and keep the rest clear of droppings.... he also cant get his head around the fact that my horse will need some form of company as he hates being on his own.

my OH refers to haylage as straw. He calls my horses stable rugs pajamas, and his outdoor rugs his macintosh. my shavings fork is known as the s*it stick.


oh, and my personal favourite, jodphurs are called 'droppers'