Another confidence post

[Jenna1406]

Hey,

I am looking for ideas on how to build up my confidence properly again.

About 3 years ago, my horse chucked me off resulting in a broken wrist, cracked ribs and wrecked confidence, I think what made it worse was I was at the yard on my own, had to take her back round and untack etc....anyway, the whole "always get back on the horse" is so true because this was the only time I was physically unable to.

Well, since then me and my mare have had a very up and down relationship, one minute we are ok and the next we fall out almost.

But recently, things (i think) have been going great BUT I havent found my confidence to canter her much. She is generally a strong horse in a snaffle but the more you pull, the more she pulls and you end up in a fight that you are not going to win.

I tried cantering her in the jumping paddock but I just panic myself thinking she is going to do something wrong (I should know she wont now, as ive seen her go xc etc) and then the canter ends up horrible.

Help me, try and build up the confidence that I used to have. Any suggestions would be very much appreciated.

Thanks
Jenna

 

[Miss L Toe]

You need to find a senior instructor who will assist both you and mare, I let mine ride most of the time, and he is now pretty calm in himself, we were previously getting in to a nervous/anxiety state, [both of us] due to my sudden lack of confidence [my leg problems]
Start from scratch and go through all the basics, do not try to start where you left off.
Three years is a long time to lose confidence, if you are not enjoying riding her you may need to find another.
P.S. do you know how to bridge the reins and set reins on neck, so she has to pull against her self and not directly through your arms?

 

[Jenna1406]

You need to find a senior instructor who will assist both you and mare, I let mine ride most of the time, and he is now pretty calm in himself, we were previously getting in to a nervous/anxiety state, [both of us] due to my sudden lack of confidence [my leg problems]
Start from scratch and go through all the basics, do not try to start where you left off.
Three years is a long time to lose confidence, if you are not enjoying riding her you may need to find another.
P.S. do you know how to bridge the reins and set reins on neck, so she has to pull against her self and not directly through your arms?

Thanks, Ive started getting lessons twice a month (or what the bank balance allows) I did have someone senior riding her but because they were riding her I took a back seat and didnt progress this year. She has been back to basics a few times and I enjoy riding her in the school - I can ask for canter there but I feel that the arena is slightly too small for helping her balance (with not cantering properly in a while with me) - so hense wanting to try the jumping paddock as its bigger and more space for her to get her balance.

Bridging, is that when you have both sides in both hands almost?? Not a very good description lol

I know she can do it, ive done it before myself but its almost like "self doubt" now that I am trying to work past.

 

[rodeo12]

Lessons are definitely the way forward. Finding somebody you trust makes a huge difference because then you know they aren't going to push you out of your capabilities but are going to push you enough. Also lessons on other horses are really useful. I broke my arm and never wanted to ride my horse again. Same as you - I couldn't get back on straight away, but I still wanted to ride. So I had lessons on another horse on the lunge and just did lots of no stirrup/rein work. Worked on getting my seat/position better giving me the confidence. Then we worked on taking what I had learnt on the other horse onto my horse so that there wasn't a huge jump.

Everything was done slowly. I felt sick at the sight of a pole so we walked over it, then when it came to planks - we just put it on the ground and again walked over it. Then when I was ready we had a go at putting a pole to a raised pole etc.

I think as well, you need to accept small steps is ok - so if you don't feel happy cantering around the field, then why not just walk/trot it each time. Have a schooling session out there. Then if you get happier on your own, try 5 strides of canter rather than trying the whole field. If you then have lessons you can do the cantering around the whole field when they are there as I think having someone there to 'help'/'watch' makes you feel so much more at ease. I always make my mum come with me when I have to ride a certain horse as I then think she's there if anything happens and can talk to me/distract me. Also allows me to have someone to rationalise my fear too.

 

[be positive]

I have been working with a lady that lacks confidence cantering, her horse was very unbalanced and fast which did not help and because of that she did hardly any cantering. In her lessons we worked on transitions, walk and trot, then trot to canter a very short canter then trotting again before losing balance, we did dozens of transitions cantering only about halfway round the school then trotting and cantering again.
Once the transitions got better, the downward ones he now does to the voice, she has gained her confidence, the horse is less excited as he is doing more cantering so not such a big deal, they now canter all the way round and are doing pole work and very small jumps happily.
She also found that going into 2 point position helped her relax so she was not trying to sit and getting tense which made him rush even more, sitting gradually became easier as they both relaxed.

 

[Jenna1406]

Lessons are definitely the way forward. Finding somebody you trust makes a huge difference because then you know they aren't going to push you out of your capabilities but are going to push you enough. Also lessons on other horses are really useful. I broke my arm and never wanted to ride my horse again. Same as you - I couldn't get back on straight away, but I still wanted to ride. So I had lessons on another horse on the lunge and just did lots of no stirrup/rein work. Worked on getting my seat/position better giving me the confidence. Then we worked on taking what I had learnt on the other horse onto my horse so that there wasn't a huge jump.

Everything was done slowly. I felt sick at the sight of a pole so we walked over it, then when it came to planks - we just put it on the ground and again walked over it. Then when I was ready we had a go at putting a pole to a raised pole etc.

I think as well, you need to accept small steps is ok - so if you don't feel happy cantering around the field, then why not just walk/trot it each time. Have a schooling session out there. Then if you get happier on your own, try 5 strides of canter rather than trying the whole field. If you then have lessons you can do the cantering around the whole field when they are there as I think having someone there to 'help'/'watch' makes you feel so much more at ease. I always make my mum come with me when I have to ride a certain horse as I then think she's there if anything happens and can talk to me/distract me. Also allows me to have someone to rationalise my fear too.

Thanks.

I got to the point two years ago that I couldnt even look at my horse because our relationship was really bad, so I had to put her out on loan but when I got her back i said "I am going to do this" its taking ages to get there but I think I will.....eventually.

My friend comes to the yard alot with me and I just get her to shout things every so often so that I am not concentrating to hard on the horse, as I think that makes it alot worse.

I sometimes ride my friends horse and he is great, only 15hh TB type, so always feel there isnt anything there but he is touch button, just sit and he is in canter. So that helps me slightly lol.

I have been working with a lady that lacks confidence cantering, her horse was very unbalanced and fast which did not help and because of that she did hardly any cantering. In her lessons we worked on transitions, walk and trot, then trot to canter a very short canter then trotting again before losing balance, we did dozens of transitions cantering only about halfway round the school then trotting and cantering again.
Once the transitions got better, the downward ones he now does to the voice, she has gained her confidence, the horse is less excited as he is doing more cantering so not such a big deal, they now canter all the way round and are doing pole work and very small jumps happily.
She also found that going into 2 point position helped her relax so she was not trying to sit and getting tense which made him rush even more, sitting gradually became easier as they both relaxed.

I think that might be a good idea, doing lots of transitions to canter and back to trot as my mare gets very excitable when cantering and she gets stressy - who can blame her when she doesnt do it often when someone on her back, so if I do canter, I have to finish the schooling session doing something completely different to relax her.

Well, I think I might actually find the 2 point position easier as well as I think because she isnt balanced, my balance isnt great either.

Would riding in the 2 point position not go against what everyone says??

 

[be positive]

Thanks.




I think that might be a good idea, doing lots of transitions to canter and back to trot as my mare gets very excitable when cantering and she gets stressy - who can blame her when she doesnt do it often when someone on her back, so if I do canter, I have to finish the schooling session doing something completely different to relax her.

Well, I think I might actually find the 2 point position easier as well as I think because she isnt balanced, my balance isnt great either.

Would riding in the 2 point position not go against what everyone says??

You would think so but by staying just off the back you can relax and so can the horse, the little horse I described above will now drop back to trot while the rider stays forward and says whoa, there is no tensing or sitting into his back, no pulling on the reins, it may not be correct as such but the rider is not planning on doing any competing she just wants to enjoy hacking and pleasure rides without having her arms pulled all the time.

Riding is not just about being correct, it should be fun and safe as long as you are secure on top your position can be adaptable to help with circumstances, not everyone can sit deep in the saddle and if the horse is tense it can be even more difficult.

 

[Jenna1406]

You would think so but by staying just off the back you can relax and so can the horse, the little horse I described above will now drop back to trot while the rider stays forward and says whoa, there is no tensing or sitting into his back, no pulling on the reins, it may not be correct as such but the rider is not planning on doing any competing she just wants to enjoy hacking and pleasure rides without having her arms pulled all the time.

Riding is not just about being correct, it should be fun and safe as long as you are secure on top your position can be adaptable to help with circumstances, not everyone can sit deep in the saddle and if the horse is tense it can be even more difficult.

I think I will give that a go as I really need to develop her canter and go forward myself and try and get back to where I was............walk, trot, canter and jumping and just plain having fun

My seat is been worked on at the moment by my instructor and trot is getting there but I can tense up in the canter. So, maybe it will be a good idea to go light back so she can work without my weight on her as well.

Need to try get my confidence up as I have a very important lesson next year, if it goes ahead and want to get as much out of it as possible