Another rant from me!

TuscanBunnyGirl said:
My friends mum did this even though my friend had all the money saved up (inc livery etc) and still said she couldn't have a horse (she's 20 now) but she went and got one and keeps it with mine on free grass livery at my house...her mum is still none the wiser but just has a happier daughter ;) Really hope you get this situation sorted OP it sounds very unfair on you :(
Are you earning enough to cover costs?
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LOL! :D Does she still not know??? :eek::eek:
Yes, I even got a second job to get there - tbh I just can't believe she keeps changing her mind. It doesn't matter - the way I see it is, if it's fate, somehow we'll be paired up if not, we won't :p xx
 
ChestnutTinker said:
LOL! :D Does she still not know??? :eek::eek:
Yes, I even got a second job to get there - tbh I just can't believe she keeps changing her mind. It doesn't matter - the way I see it is, if it's fate, somehow we'll be paired up if not, we won't :p xx
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Nope she doesnt :p: Well if you have the money saved you could always buy him off your own back.
I agree! :D Everything happens for a reason! :D Best of luck, I really hope you're able to sort something. Do you have plenty of riding? xx
 
Bexx said:
This is exactly what I'm doing, working loads, saving up but still able to pay for lessons and things. Will be moving out as soon as I've finished my degree :D
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Yeah I am just going to save up and see what fate brings :)

TuscanBunnyGirl said:
Nope she doesnt :p: Well if you have the money saved you could always buy him off your own back.
I agree! :D Everything happens for a reason! :D Best of luck, I really hope you're able to sort something. Do you have plenty of riding? xx
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:eek::eek: That's actually amazing.
I would love to do something like that but I am a naff liar :p I don't, I just ride when somebody offers :p but i'll sit patient and wait for my companion to find me :) xx
 
Hello ChestnutTinker, I remember your other post about your mum not letting you buy a horse. That was a good call BTW, you've landed on your feet with some gorgeous small ones to play with - they'll teach you an awful lot. :)

With this one.. Hmm. 3 year olds can be difficult, and you can make some huge mistakes with them if you don't have the experience or experienced people around you. Tread carefully, they cost as much to keep as a 10 year old and it'll be a long road before you can do all the things you want to. However, on the other side you're obviously - and clearly one of the most dedicated young women I've come across. Very admirable quality. Don't let your heart rule your head. Really think about what you want as I remember the car thing cropping up, and now you're talking about moving out. These things take an awfully large chunk of anyone disposable income. And probably won't leave any room for horses. :(

Re your mum, reading between the lines a bit, my little brain tells me she secretly wants a horse? You said she used to ride? I think she still loves the idea, but has her practical head on and probably is concerned about the cost - and that parts winning.

I say all sorts of things I want to do, mostly I'm musing... Mums are funny things, we all want to give our children what we never had, or had but really had to fight to get. I want the moon on a stick for mine - doesn't mean they get it. A very good call not to fib either. ;)

It will all work out. You're a tenacious girl, I'm sure you'll make it hapen. ;)
 
shmoo said:
Hello ChestnutTinker, I remember your other post about your mum not letting you buy a horse. That was a good call BTW, you've landed on your feet with some gorgeous small ones to play with - they'll teach you an awful lot. :)

With this one.. Hmm. 3 year olds can be difficult, and you can make some huge mistakes with them if you don't have the experience or experienced people around you. Tread carefully, they cost as much to keep as a 10 year old and it'll be a long road before you can do all the things you want to. However, on the other side you're obviously - and clearly one of the most dedicated young women I've come across. Very admirable quality. Don't let your heart rule your head. Really think about what you want as I remember the car thing cropping up, and now you're talking about moving out. These things take an awfully large chunk of anyone disposable income. And probably won't leave any room for horses. :(
(I haven't lied at all, so not sure what you meant by the fibbing bit, although i'm sure it's innocent) :o
Re your mum, reading between the lines a bit, my little brain tells me she secretly wants a horse? You said she used to ride? I think she still loves the idea, but has her practical head on and probably is concerned about the cost - and that parts winning.

I say all sorts of things I want to do, mostly I'm musing... Mums are funny things, we all want to give our children what we never had, or had but really had to fight to get. I want the moon on a stick for mine - doesn't mean they get it. A very good call not to fib either. ;)

It will all work out. You're a tenacious girl, I'm sure you'll make it hapen. ;)
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Hello :)

I know, money is a huge factor in life and I haven't got my priorities straight but I have decided against getting a horse - you're right, I have the ponies and they're amazing little poppets :D But i'll admit, I do miss riding :p

I completely understand people's worries when I mentioned him being a three year old - needs a strong, understanding handler one who essentially knows what they're doing, which in this case isn't me :o A lot of me wanting to move out is due to the arguments with mum, they flare up and then settle down so I have 'I want to move out' and 'I'm happy here' moments if that makes sense :p And realistically I can't afford a car and i'm looking at getting a moped, which will take a lot of my money which obviously leaves me with not enough for a horse :cool: So even I know, I have to sort my priorities out :p

I don't know about my mum - she did used to ride, infact she had 2 horses on loan and used to do local shows but I don't know if she wants a horse, I think she's just getting a reaction out of me :p

I have no idea what tenacious means :o but I'm hoping it's nothing bad - may have to google that :p

Thank you for your reply :) xx
 
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ChestnutTinker said:
Hello :)

So even I know, I have to sort my priorities out :p

I have no idea what tenacious means :o but I'm hoping it's nothing bad - may have to google that :p

Thank you for your reply :) xx
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I'd say you're there already - you know what you need, no more sorting to do!

We're all allowed to dream, no harm in that. :D

Is it Paddy who was the hunky cob we saw you on? Is he on holiday? When does he come back or did he go for good? :confused:
 
shmoo said:
I'd say you're there already - you know what you need, no more sorting to do!

We're all allowed to dream, no harm in that. :D

Is it Paddy who was the hunky cob we saw you on? Is he on holiday? When does he come back or did he go for good? :confused:
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Paddy has permanently moved to Scotland and sadly isn't coming back :( xx
 
sounds like she is just scared, play her along and say that your friend has said you can have the horse but keep it going for a few days and see how she reacts, before letting her down and saying you have changed your mind and looking for another horse with more whatever you decide. Then see if she suddenly comes out of the woods and helps or starts to ask questions positively.
 
Terri's advice is bang on. Like her, I didn't have my own horse until I was in my early 30s but I must have ridden thousands. I was offered a horse I was very fond of for meat money when I was 21 but I knew then that I couldn't really afford to keep it as I wanted to leave home. I worked weekends with horses for years and years ( riding school, thoroughbred stud breaking and yard work, doing hunters etc) before I got my old lad on loan. Lost him to colic after 16 years, had three years of riding other people's and at the age of 49 finally bought my own. Sometimes the best thing is to wait, even though it's hard.
You will get there - tenacious is like a terrier with a bone. I wish you good luck and you will know when the time is right.
 
moleskinsmum said:
Terri's advice is bang on. Like her, I didn't have my own horse until I was in my early 30s but I must have ridden thousands. I was offered a horse I was very fond of for meat money when I was 21 but I knew then that I couldn't really afford to keep it as I wanted to leave home. I worked weekends with horses for years and years ( riding school, thoroughbred stud breaking and yard work, doing hunters etc) before I got my old lad on loan. Lost him to colic after 16 years, had three years of riding other people's and at the age of 49 finally bought my own. Sometimes the best thing is to wait, even though it's hard.
You will get there - tenacious is like a terrier with a bone. I wish you good luck and you will know when the time is right.
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Sounds like a plan, i'll just wait :) I'll find my horse sometime :p
Ps: Haven't heard the term up t'dale in a while :p
 
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putasocinit said:
sounds like she is just scared, play her along and say that your friend has said you can have the horse but keep it going for a few days and see how she reacts, before letting her down and saying you have changed your mind and looking for another horse with more whatever you decide. Then see if she suddenly comes out of the woods and helps or starts to ask questions positively.
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Hahahhaa :D
This may or may not work :p
 
You sound a very level headed person, you will get what you want, but sometimes it takes time. You'll get there. I know this might sound a bit strange, but have a toddle over to mumsnet and read about narcissistic parents, see if any is familiar. I might be way off, but if there is a possibility it might give you a bit of an insight and help you deal with your mum.

Good luck. Shame I am not a bit nearer (only preston) you could come for a hack!
 
Gleeful Imp said:
You sound a very level headed person, you will get what you want, but sometimes it takes time. You'll get there. I know this might sound a bit strange, but have a toddle over to mumsnet and read about narcissistic parents, see if any is familiar. I might be way off, but if there is a possibility it might give you a bit of an insight and help you deal with your mum.

Good luck. Shame I am not a bit nearer (only preston) you could come for a hack!
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Aw, I appreciate the offer thank you so much lovely! xx
I may have to look that up! xx
 
Aww! This must be making you feel awful, being up one minute and down the next. :mad: I really want my own too but I'm thinking that I'll try and get lots of experience and money now and it will be my ambition for when I'm a bit older.

I think maybe you'd feel better if you'd worked towards getting your own horse and then the only person you'd have to rely on is yourself :) Then it wouldn't matter what your Mum thinks, you wont have to get your hopes up only for them to be ruined by someone else a bit later. Just think, there's no rush, you've got plenty of time for riding now with no really difficult commitments but every shift you do is a little bit extra. (I fell over at work today and felt a complete idiot but at least it seems a better thinking it will be towards something :D) And then you'd hopefully be able to drive too.

I hope you can find a loan/share horse to look after and ride in the meantime :)
 
PleaseVenus said:
Aww! This must be making you feel awful, being up one minute and down the next. :mad: I really want my own too but I'm thinking that I'll try and get lots of experience and money now and it will be my ambition for when I'm a bit older.

I think maybe you'd feel better if you'd worked towards getting your own horse and then the only person you'd have to rely on is yourself :) Then it wouldn't matter what your Mum thinks, you wont have to get your hopes up only for them to be ruined by someone else a bit later. Just think, there's no rush, you've got plenty of time for riding now with no really difficult commitments but every shift you do is a little bit extra. (I fell over at work today and felt a complete idiot but at least it seems a better thinking it will be towards something :D) And then you'd hopefully be able to drive too.

I hope you can find a loan/share horse to look after and ride in the meantime :)
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Oh no! I hope you're ok?
I will do, i've still got the ponies thankfully but just taking each payday as it comes and waiting until I can afford my own :p
 
CT you come across alot like Abbie (Tessybear)...mature and level headed. I wanted the same at your age and a year later got what I wanted...only to dicover that I had neither the finances or knowledge I thought I had and after a month I had to send the horse back :o
It was a lesson well learned. I then lost touch with my riding for a few years and got my own horse again a couple of years ago (Im now 32). Its hard for me as I have to kerp mine as simply and cheaply as possible without compromising their welfare due to having a disabled child to care for meaning I cannot work full time. Life is a juggling act but it can be done. Keep saving and get as many riding experiences as possible. You sound like a very lovely and determined young lady so I KNOW you will get there :) xx
 
SatansLittleHelper said:
CT you come across alot like Abbie (Tessybear)...mature and level headed. I wanted the same at your age and a year later got what I wanted...only to dicover that I had neither the finances or knowledge I thought I had and after a month I had to send the horse back :o
It was a lesson well learned. I then lost touch with my riding for a few years and got my own horse again a couple of years ago (Im now 32). Its hard for me as I have to kerp mine as simply and cheaply as possible without compromising their welfare due to having a disabled child to care for meaning I cannot work full time. Life is a juggling act but it can be done. Keep saving and get as many riding experiences as possible. You sound like a very lovely and determined young lady so I KNOW you will get there :) xx
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To be compared to Abbie has put a smile on my face as she is one of the most amazing people i've ever met! So thank you for that! I'm so sorry you had to send your first horse back, I can't imagine the heartbreak you must have felt - the way I see it, i'm going with the whole 'fate' theory. If it's meant to be, it'll all work out and mum will settle down and be happy, if not, it won't. I'll just take it as a life lesson and wait until it happens by itself. I'm lucky there's so many amazing people on here who are always there to listen to my rants. So thank you everyone xxx
 
Hehe I'm fine, I just felt like a complete idiot.

Keep saving :) I'm doing the same on payday hehe. It's good that you've got the ponies! Just think if you wait for a bit until you can drive and have more money then it'll be so much easier and you can spoil your horse rather than have to struggle to afford little things on your own.

It'll happen in the end :D
 
PleaseVenus said:
Hehe I'm fine, I just felt like a complete idiot.

Keep saving :) I'm doing the same on payday hehe. It's good that you've got the ponies! Just think if you wait for a bit until you can drive and have more money then it'll be so much easier and you can spoil your horse rather than have to struggle to afford little things on your own.

It'll happen in the end :D
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Sure hope so :D:D xx
 
I'm in a similar(ish) position CT, apart from the fact I'm starting a degree in breeding and stud management in September.

My mum was actively encouraging me to get a horse to take with me to uni, but now that I'm going to view one on Tuesday, she's denying everything.

We've spoken, and I've worked out costs (insurance, feet, wormers, everything!) and it will all be manageable AND I'll be able to feed myself if she's happy to continue my current allowance. My maintenance loan covers my accommodation (including 10 meals per week), so she's agreed that we'll discuss this further once I've met the filly and decided whether I want to take the plunge or not.

Think you've got a fantastic attitude to all this, and I really hope it works out for you!! X
 
Jinx94 said:
I'm in a similar(ish) position CT, apart from the fact I'm starting a degree in breeding and stud management in September.

My mum was actively encouraging me to get a horse to take with me to uni, but now that I'm going to view one on Tuesday, she's denying everything.

We've spoken, and I've worked out costs (insurance, feet, wormers, everything!) and it will all be manageable AND I'll be able to feed myself if she's happy to continue my current allowance. My maintenance loan covers my accommodation (including 10 meals per week), so she's agreed that we'll discuss this further once I've met the filly and decided whether I want to take the plunge or not.

Think you've got a fantastic attitude to all this, and I really hope it works out for you!! X
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Thank you so much - I'm just frustrated that I would give a horse everything and more and there's people out there who get one given and aren't interested :p Oh well, it'll be a much loved, very spoilt horse when I buy one :)

Hope everything works out for you to my dear xxx :)
 
CT what are you doing for school/career plans at the moment?

The reason I ask is that you sound like you'd make an excellent working pupil. At the right yard it can be an amazing experience and you'll learn loads.
 
MizzPurpleKitten said:
CT I know Skipton is a bit of a travel away but......Can you get to Batley? I may have a proposition for you if you can! XxX
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I'm down at Gildersome more than I am Batley, Not sure if there's a bus there from Gildersome or not :o xxx

Patterdale said:
CT what are you doing for school/career plans at the moment?

The reason I ask is that you sound like you'd make an excellent working pupil. At the right yard it can be an amazing experience and you'll learn loads.
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I'm just working at the moment - don't go to college as I found the classroom experience didn't work for me, I just got frustrated and couldn't settle :o
 
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Why don't you seriously consider the working pupil route then?

You'll meet great horsey people, learn loads and get lots of riding. You also get paid in the majority of places, and if you want a career with horses it'll be a great start.

It'll get you away from home too ;)

I went to be a working pupil at 16 and loved it. I got my horse of a lifetime from the yard I went to aswell so who knows what could happen?
 
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