Any words of wisdom/kick up the bum

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dreambigpony

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All being well tomorrow I would like to hack out on my own. I haven't ridden for about a week...I tend do ride regularly for a few weeks and then not often for a few weeks...I get so nervous and put riding off...I don't even know why but I am a lot better now. Any tips or encouragement. I really love hacking but I get incredibly anxious and my mare is only a youngster so I know I need to be feeling confident so she feels it too
 
I'm a nervous hacker! I went for 2.5 hours the other day and discovered madam doesn't like it at the back... But as I'd had 3 kalms an hour before I rode none of it mattered and now I feel like a hero! Kalms work for me. It will be so worth it, do it do it!
 
hey lovely girl, you are now 18 and can conquer the world! get the music on and throw that horrid little confidence zapping monster behind you, i remember the first time i ventured out into the wilderness here as a novice rider , boy was i scared but i just kept singing ' i can do this . i can do this , lalalalala and i realised i could and the more i did it , the more me and my horse relaxed. xxx
 
Shady said:
hey lovely girl, you are now 18 and can conquer the world! get the music on and throw that horrid little confidence zapping monster behind you, i remember the first time i ventured out into the wilderness here as a novice rider , boy was i scared but i just kept singing ' i can do this . i can do this , lalalalala and i realised i could and the more i did it , the more me and my horse relaxed. xxx
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Bless, thanks for such a positive reply. It is so frustrating as when I first bought her I was unbreakable, cantering out on hacks, out on my own, jumping and all sorts.
 
Mine is young too and sometimes I try to talk myself out of riding- no idea why! I have bags of confidence and then I decide I don't! I just take the leap and tell myself if I look after her , she will look after me.i also find that staying in my comfort zone initially really helps make me realise everything is and will be fine. I have also become v confident and firm in my signals to drivers, I think this gives my horse confidence in me taking hold of the situation- sounds daft but works for me!
 
This may or may not help, but when my hacking nerves get the better of me I make up daft scenarios in my head to distract myself. Like 'oh no, young Billy has got his head stuck in the railings, I must ride for help' and 'there's a tree down on the line, I have to warn the station master before it's too late'. I know, ridiculous Victorian high drama, I'm sure everyone else can think of better emergencies but it amuses me and takes my mind off feeling wobbly.
 
I am always a little nervous before riding - me and the toilet are good friends! lol. I find though that once I'm on, I'm fine. I am then in charge and my mare looks to me for confidence, especially out hacking alone. knowing that she is relying on me to 'get her through it' gives me confidence as I don't want to let her down. :) I also talk complete nonsense to her the whole way round. I'm sure she's pleased to get home to give her ears a break! :D

hacking in company, cantering in particular, is giving me a few collywobbles at the moment, but i'll get there. the people on this forum are great at giving advice and boosting confidence.
 
gala said:
This may or may not help, but when my hacking nerves get the better of me I make up daft scenarios in my head to distract myself. Like 'oh no, young Billy has got his head stuck in the railings, I must ride for help' and 'there's a tree down on the line, I have to warn the station master before it's too late'. I know, ridiculous Victorian high drama, I'm sure everyone else can think of better emergencies but it amuses me and takes my mind off feeling wobbly.
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This is a great idea! When I'm schooling I pretend I'm John Whitaker... Would John Whitaker be scared? No, he'd sit up and shorten his reins so he would! Works for me!
 
So today was the day...
I did it!! Only a very short hack as the roads were very icy but I did it. My mare wasn't in the best of moods either... She heard another horse whinny and so she spun round and was reversing but I kept my calm and felt in control still :D
 
whoo hoo Dream girl!!!!! well done you, i am very pleased to hear you kicked the monsters a** to day, it's a damn awful thing losing your confidence but i hate , hate hate ANYTHING beating me, iv'e fallen off, been dragged, nearly fell off a cliff once and every time i get home from a ride i think thank god i'm still alive and in one piece but i love my mad adventures on my horse and every time i go out it gets a little easier and i think up yours to all those people who said i would have to get rid of my beautiful Shadow after my stroke. you keep getting out there sweetie , you'll get there again soon.xxxx
 
SadKen said:
This is a great idea! When I'm schooling I pretend I'm John Whitaker... Would John Whitaker be scared? No, he'd sit up and shorten his reins so he would! Works for me!
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Ha ha, one of my other riding confidence fantasy thingys is to imagine I've got Kelly Marks or Monty Roberts there telling me what to do! Works doesn't it? Well done OP your successful hack today, hope you have many more good ones to come.
 
Awesome...it's get easier each time you do it. I sing and talk to myself but when I feel that mines getting on her toes I will school....walk, halt, walk trot transitions and if the road is clear I'll try and do some lateral work. It takes my mind off what could happen and back on the positive. I also plan how I am going to handle situations...knowing where I can get off the road and what I will do when she looks at dragons in the hedge (leg yield, normally).
 
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