Anyone succeeded in converting a non horsey other half???

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melv1lle

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The question says it all really! I have been with my boyfriend for four years and have spent much of it trying to convince him of the merits of horses and riding. I have managed to get him to the stables three times although the last two he refused to get out of the car in case he got muddy shoes (he is a bit of a Londoner
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). On holidays I have managed to get him up on a horse three or four times (generally involves alot of emotional blackmail or post watershed bribery
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) and the daft thing is he is a very good natural rider. We went riding in Bali and they put him on quite a flighty thing - and even though this was only his third time on a horse he spent the entire time galloping (mainly because he said it meant he could get to the end quicker!). So as my attempts are clearly not working at all I just wondered if anyone else had been any more successful??
 
Nope. I've been with my OH 3 1/2 years now, and at first he would come to the shows and watch me. But now i can't even get him to the stables any more than once about every 2 months. He won't come to the shows because either i get up too early or my horsebox is too much of a heap.
 
Why on earth would you want to?! I am quite happy having my own time with my horse plodding about doing what I like thank you!
 
Yes, my husband was a competitive body builder, who lived in a city before I met him, but he started having riding lessons and now has his own horse.
 
I have been with mine 17 years and although he will an emergency clean out and feed. He doesn't have anything to do with them. He helps haymaking and muckspreading but won't ride. He tells me when the are fitted with decent brakes and a steering whell he might.

I'd personally just give up and live with the fact that he's not horsey.
 
I've converted him as much as I really want to. He now loves Ronnie and likes to come and see him (infrequently, but then he does work very long hours). I haven't yet got him on a horse though came very close, and he is keen to have a go. He reckons he'll be willing to come to shows, particularly if I'm jumping, and I could do with the help and will really appreciate it if he does.

It would be fun for him to have a horse too (obviously following riding lessons etc), but he doesn't have the time to look after it or ride that often, so that would fall to me, and I don't really have the time for 2.
 
Yip, have done it twice!!!!! ex boyfriend though loved horses just had never ridden. the way I did it, was the same for both. Got tickets to olympia, booked plush hotel in kensington and went for 4 days to london, had a show booked as well. we did olympia one night, show on one of the other nights, dinner in really nice restaurants etc.Just the typical london weekend break just one of the things we did was olympia.

After the olympia experience, I introduced eventing - did the same thing for badminton - nice hotel, cross country, nice meal afterwards. After that they started suggesting maybe trying riding lessons and that was it!

Its like training anything, get them to associate it with a nice experience and then they will go for it.
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Just remember if you do plan something like that, if it rains/snows/hails your plans go up in smoke and more damage is done!

Good luck!!!!!
 
I have the same problem! Although being an outdoor type, the excuse i'd that horses are too slow - even a racehorse would be "too slow" at 30mph! In a way, I've made my own problems after I dragged on a trek/ride in NZ and we got to swim on the horses. So the other excuse is "it won't be as good as NZ", to which there really is no answer!
My YM has offered to take him for a "fast" hack this year. I really hope I can get him to do it- so he enjoys it and realises it's not as easy as he thinks.
 
My OH was totally non horsey until my stable fell to pieces, he then had to come to the yard to fix it. I then had to have an op which meant no lifting or leading playful youngsters to the field so he had no choice but to get involved. He loves it now, goes out riding and can be found at the stables every day mucking out!!
 
Because all I ever get from him at the weekends is that he is a horse widow and that I love my horse more than him (well he might be right on that one ...). Don't get me wrong have no urge to mope round the yard together holding hands
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but I just find it a shame sometimes that he doesnt get my passion for riding at all. Plus it would be useful to get him along to some shows to be a free groom
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Nope, and wouldn't have it any other way. I get free rein with my horse, and he gets to watch as much football as he wants.
He will come see the horses occasionally, as long as the weather is ok. He calls every horse 'Willow' and is great at feeding treats and filling up water buckets. At a push he'll lead one to the field for me.
He came riding on a couple of gentle hacks when we first started going out, but once we were properly dating he stayed well away from the stables
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Wasn't an overly deliberate thing but when we married I was helping at a stud farm for Shire horses. Hubbs used to come and stroke them at a distance, suggested he tried a lesson and he was immediately hooked! Was competing at local level within 6 months and it went from strength to strength! He adores horses and be careful what you wish for! I am his groom now lol!!!!
He has other interests such as ice climbing etc. and I have mine as well but horses are really his thing!
 
Yep I think i have been quite successful - he was a complete londoner before me!! He wont ride but he will come down the yard with me sometimes (he certainly doesnt want to all the time lol!) and he will do them for me if i need him to which is good. He has even admitted that he enjoys doing them by himself!! My mare also really likes him which is amazing as she doesnt like many people! He will also come to shows with me although he can get in teh way a tiny bit!!
 
Yup - OH had never been within 20 foot of a horse 2 years ago - now he has taken over what was my Tb and I bought another horse for myself.

He hopes to event next year - I only wanted to get him involved so he could be my 'groom' it now looks like its going to be the other way round....
 
yep- only took a couple of weeks, to make him go from not wanting to go near Solo to leading him about. Fast forward to last august, and he bought his own horse!
 
I have been with my OH for 8 years. When we first met we ended up living at the stables and he was more than happy to come to shows and pat the horses. He's a real animal person which helped.
I had a break while at Uni and then when I got my old mare I gradually got him coming down more and more. He loved her and she loved him (possibly due to the sacks of carrots he fed her every time he came down). I then got him on. That was it after he had ridden a couple of times I phoned to ask him something at work and they said he was at the stables!
Be careful what you wish for though. In the end he and the horse loved each other more than me!!!! We sold her last year due to his work moving us away and I think next time I'll make him buy his own
 
When I first got my mare,he had a go at a local riding school,and rode a piebald called Dublin.......the pair had no fear at all
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......lost interest and went back to his cricket and golf.......the only responce I get now when returning from yard is 'Every thing all right!' Will come to shows and help,but not done any of those of late!
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I've been with my BF for 2 and a half years and he was more a cow man than a horse man. He loves Henry now! They constantly hug and are lovely to each other. Henry is very wary of men and has been since before I got him. He loves my boyfriend and my dad. BF even rode him once, and although Henry was a star he said he would never do it again. He once came riding with a friend and I and he says it was the story of his life!!!
 
Pick a man with a motorbike.
At least he will understand your obsession, and the huge expenditure!
Mine is ex-farmer and Harley owner, but because of the farmer bit has a rather spartan attitude towards horses, like they are cows or sheep.
However he knows I love Jack and will do most of the hard graft work for me and is brilliant at mucking out.
Has got on a horse on holiday, under duress, but I think its the man thing about having no steering, brakes or accelerator that they find boring.
I know i will never convert him.
Plus would need a Clydesdale as he is 6ft 3 and 15.5 stone!!
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That made me giggle because my other half has nicknamed my two uhu and bostic and as I am thinking of getting a companion pony, he says that is going to be referred to as pritt stick!

I have kind of semi-converted him, he will muck out, change rugs, lead etc. but only at a weekend and usually only so that we can do it quicker so we can go do something else. He refuses point blank to get on a horse though, but as much as I wish he was more horsey, I do quite like the fact we have separate interests, so whilst he may "help" and rush me along on a Saturday morning I know that he will be off to the football in the afternoon leaving me with plenty time to be out pottering around the stables.
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My husband positively disliked horses when I met him. For the first few years I think he had no idea how keen I had been as a child and teenager. Then after we'd been together for some 13 years he was chatting to our neighbour who had horses and she said she'd got a problem and he told her that I liked horses and would help her out. After not riding for 25 years I ended up re-breaking a little cob for her and my husband discovered that horses like cuddles and that actually he did like them. Fast forward 6 years and he now supports me and six of them and will happily muck out, do waters and hays and feeds. He is keen to lead them to the fields and that helped with his rehabilitation after a bad accident. Asking him to do physio didn't work. Claiming that I couldn't manage to lead two ponies a third of a mile to the field got him walking properly as he lead a very gentle sensible and reliable pony. Changing him to leading a slightly more awkward one improved his speed and balance! He is now keen to tackle even the youngster but I don't usually let him as he isn't really very balanced on his feet and I wouldn't want anything to go wrong. He's one of the main reasons we still have six - he loves them all and can't bear to part with them.

He goes to most of my daughter's lesson in the lorry with us and enjoys going to competitions as well - mind you I do make sure he has a decent picnic there. He helps out fence judging unaff and BE or will organise the lorry parking at the venue. Last year he joined our local PC committee. I don't think he'll ever ride, both his legs are mainly metal now and one of his arms and he has a great fear of further injury.

I couldn't do without his support and I'm really grateful to him for making it possible for me to have horses now. He even asked if I wanted a better horse to do a season's BE this year! Sadly circumstances have made that impossible but it was so generous of him to offer that level of help.

I have a husband in a million!
 
[ QUOTE ]
Pick a man with a motorbike.
At least he will understand your obsession, and the huge expenditure!


[/ QUOTE ]

I have to say that my husband's obession was motorbikes and racing - as mine was too when I gave up horses in my late teens. At the time he had his accident we had six bikes and he's always said one of the main reasons we got together was that he'd never met a girl before who didn't mind him stripping an engine on half of the kitchen table whilst she was making bread and pies on the other half - he did look carefully at quiches to check that it was pepper on top of them and not lumps of engine dirt!
 
My husband isnt horsey, and have given up trying to convert him! if i am really ill, (and i mean really ill)lol then he will do them for me, he is useful for repairing fences and stables though!
 
Converted my ex quite easily but not my current OH (been 4 years now).

My ex was great, would happily sit on my boy (had had a few lessons as a teenager) and would groom / muck out / buy the odd rug etc etc. When i moved onto DIY livery he used to do morning shifts for me
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Current OH started off OK (is too heavy to sit on my horse). Would lead horse to field, groom, put bed down for me (never got him mucking out), walk on hacks with me etc. But overtime I'm afraid he has become untrained and now moans, doesn't groom etc etc and only comes to the field under duress! He did however manage to put me together 2 stables and help me with fencing, hay stacking and shows last year (so not all bad).

I'm afraid he moans about the time / money / effort I spend on the horse (who I've had 13 years so going nowhere!). I'm hoping to look at a new horse this weekend and he's mentioning "the end" if I do. I've told him I won't finish with him for new horsey as I will need him to come help me pick it up and build it a new shelter
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I have been with my BF for 2 months, he now comes to the yard with me every day!!!

He'll muck out, do water, haynets, feed, catch her...groom her, everything! He has even ridden her a few times, which is amazing considering how difficult she can be/is. She is up for sale at the mo, and he keeps trying to persuade me to keep her! lol
 
nope, been trying for nearly 10 yrs....he's not the slightest bit interested and hates them and wudn't dream of helping with them , i.e. muck out etc !!
 
Well my son doesn't " do horses " but his longterm girlfiend has a 37 old pony who is on DIY. When they first met he wouldn't even go to her yard. When she went away for the weekend he did the lot bless him. Pony was poorly at the weekend and he took his girlfriend up the yard every couple of hours during the night. My OH is now horsey and if am honest I love the time I get with Finn when its just me and him ( which isn't that often)
 
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