anyone tried NLP for confidence?

[Nat_in_Kent]

Im trying to regain my confidence on the horse that has made me lose it lol!

he can be a bit sharp and quite spooky, and Im finding I cannot relax on him and ride defensively whilst imagining all the possible disastrous events that will occur! so much so that I pee myself off
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This of course leaves me in a vicious circle as Im "riding with the handbrake on" as my RI rightly puts it, which then makes hims tense and it goes on and on!

Ive read up about a rider detox nlp program for confidence issues and sounds just what I need but at over £500 for a day seminar its just not an option.

Does anyone have first hand experience of these rider specific nlp courses? or can recommend any reading material/books that have helped?

Hes such a fab horse, and with a relaxed confident rider he goes great and is very genuine and honest, and If I could overcome my own demons then we could start to progress! x

 

[Iceni]

Hmm I've been in a similar position to you, and for me the horse proved too much despite loving him dearly and desperately wanting it to work, I just wasn't capable of riding him and after a bad accident couldn't really relax properly, and I started to lose the pleasure of horses and riding altogether. On the reading front there's a popular book called "feel the fear and do it anyway" which I think is very good at helping perspectives of danger. Just don't push yourself too hard, be realistic about what you are trying to achieve. In other words sometimes we are right and justified to be scared and at other times just need a helping hand to get it into perspective! Wish you all the best

 

[dany]

Nat... are you FB friends with Clare Drury? if you are then look up a friend of hers called Ros Blackmore as I had an NLP seesion with her and it was really interesting. She worked on visualising good memories and replanting them on the scary ones (over simplyfing of course)
This was a few years back when the whole Wolfie thing was going on, but she may still be teaching.

At least it would give you a first hand idea of what its all about before sending out larger wads of cash x

 

[Rosie2407]

Hmm I've been in a similar position to you, and for me the horse proved too much despite loving him dearly and desperately wanting it to work, I just wasn't capable of riding him and after a bad accident couldn't really relax properly, and I started to lose the pleasure of horses and riding altogether. On the reading front there's a popular book called "feel the fear and do it anyway" which I think is very good at helping perspectives of danger. Just don't push yourself too hard, be realistic about what you are trying to achieve. In other words sometimes we are right and justified to be scared and at other times just need a helping hand to get it into perspective! Wish you all the best

What did you end up doing? have you fixed your problem? I just ask as am in a very similar way myself at the moment and not sure how to get out of it!

 

[Nat_in_Kent]

Hmm I've been in a similar position to you, and for me the horse proved too much despite loving him dearly and desperately wanting it to work, I just wasn't capable of riding him and after a bad accident couldn't really relax properly, and I started to lose the pleasure of horses and riding altogether. On the reading front there's a popular book called "feel the fear and do it anyway" which I think is very good at helping perspectives of danger. Just don't push yourself too hard, be realistic about what you are trying to achieve. In other words sometimes we are right and justified to be scared and at other times just need a helping hand to get it into perspective! Wish you all the best

yes, that sounds very similar situation to me and Finn too.

Im gong to give it till summer with lessons, confidence help etc so then if I have to admint defeat its after Ive exhausted every avenue

and cheers as ever Dany! x

 

[Cuppatea]

Bachs rescue remedy, from boots

 

[xxMozlarxx]

Hi, I had a phobia of flying so had 2 sessions with an NLP practitioner to fly on honeymoon, didnt have time for more. It worked and I would go back anytime, I did consider it as I lost my nerve after having an operation myself and having a young horse it was impacting his training but was able to overcome this. Dont pay £500 find an NLP practitioner near you and give it a trial.
PS I'm a really cynical person about this sort of thing usually but this is a common sense approach based on changing how you think.

 

[Cinnamontoast]

I know a mate who used it for riding and she is a huge fan. I might try a hypnotherapist for weight loss or NLP, dunno.

 

[Shay]

My daughter used NLP very successfully. But I would reccommend against the "rider specific" detox programmes. I'm sure they do work - but they are very over prices and play of the fact that we all have confidennce issues at some time or another.

You are far better off using a "normal" nlp practitioner. If you ask about you can probably find one who rides too - we did. But there is no need for anything "rider specific".

If you work that way books like Kelly Mark's Perfect confidennce - which is very NLP based - can also help. But some people work well trying to learn out of books and others do better face to face.

 

[MDJO]

I've had two sessions with Danielle Olding, a very experienced NLP practioner who is very good with horsey confidence problems. Been struggling (sorry battling) with my confidence for last 4 years. She's cracked it. It is about changing how you think, rather than some magic cure. Works on the principles that your brain is just another muscle and responds to what you feed it (with actions, behaviours, values, beliefs etc). The brain doesn't know that what you're feeding it might be utter tosh, so performs accordingly. An NLP practioner will work with you to identify why you currently believe you're not confident (might not be the same as the reality) and give you tools and techniques to change this. Seriously recommend it, this has not only given me confidence in my riding but has allowed me to change a lot of things in my life. Danielles website is www.sportshorsenlp.co.uk
Good luck - you can change this

 

[kizzywiz]

Yes, I have used NLP with great success for major confidence loss with show jumping. It has worked amazingly, August - fell apart & unable to join 2 50cm fences together, November - joining 2 90cm fences together with 3 level strides & jumping double clear at show last week. PM me if you want more details about who I used & what we did.