Anyone with high functioning asd??

[showaddy1]

I've been riding for over 30yrs, but only recently diagnosed (more for DD than me, I'm doing ok and knew who I was a long time ago).
Horses are my 'obsession'... And I live and breath for my equine friends... They keep me calm and balanced
Anyway, point to this post is I've recently started to have lessons again, as my confidence on the horses was at an all time and hadn't cantered for years. Instructor has done amazing, and within four half hour lessons I am cantering both reins and focusing on my transitions
Anyone have any suggestions how to stop me thinking? Over thinking is a main trait of high functioning asd, and it's affecting my riding..
Thankyou for reading x

 

[skint1]

I don't think I have asd but I do have an anxiety disorder, it has robbed me of a lot of joy over the years, including with horses, but I try not to let it beat me.

When my mind starts to run away with me I try and look around and focus on something in the here and now, or if I have a negative thought I try and balance with a positive one, or I tell myself that I will allow myself some time worry all I want later on...these things have helped but it's not perfect! Good luck!

 

[ester]

Yes but sorry no suggestions!

I'm not riding at the moment but have had some comments recently about it from my personal trainer and physio. It was gutting to hear but actually I needed to explain to them that it isn't going to happe, it isn't something I can change (having spent plenty of time trying) and actually I do need to think stuff through step by step especially when it isn't doing the right thing. . After some negotiation we got to a bit of a compromise at least! So I think you need to work with it rather than against it as much as possible.

 

[showaddy1]

Anxiety and asd go hand in hand so I can empathise well skint 1!
Ester - I would like to think that my asd allows me to have a better connection with my ride, that because of our heightened senses I can pick up everything that the horse is trying to tell me. Truth is I'm so busy thinking about all this that I forget the basic position, and find keeping focus almost impossible!

 

[ester]

see with what I am doing at the moment we are not convinced my propioception is normal, it's a toss up between that and whether I am not identifying stuff because it feels 'normal' to me. It's been a long time since I learned anything 'physical' from scratch and it has been quite telling to some extent.

I think at this point I would say you have clearly made some significant progress, you might like to make faster progress but everyone has their things that hold them back a bit. I do find once I have enough muscle memory for something I can stop thinking quite so much but it takes me quite a long time to get to that point. So as long as you are staying on it all seems good to me

 

[Equi]

I dont believe i have ASD but i do overthink thinks a lot with canter transitions. One thing i recently discovered (literally a few days ago) was that i basically forget, or don't think at all about them when i have some other goal. My goal this time was that a magpie was doing my head in squawking and being territorial in the arena over half a dead pigeon or something. I got so annoyed at it flying about and barking at me i turned and went at it, and i was in cantering without noticing. So obviously my body did the action, but my brain was not thinking about it. Another time i do this is if my horse is bolshy/napping at the gate. I turn and "make him work" so that going out the gate is not an avoidance. He MUST stand at the open gate for however long i want him to (good practice for TREC), or he gets a sharp turn and kick on. At that point im not thinking about pace or transition, im just thinking "you have to go and work boy!" Try maybe having some one at the side saying you have 5 seconds to get down the long side, so count to yourself but let your body make you get there in 5 seconds!

 

[paddy555]

really really strong focus. Forget your position and forget, say if you want to turn left, where each leg should be and each hand, and your seat and your shoulders and everything else. Focus so very strongly, hard eyes, look 3 or 4 yards in front of the horse and focus totally on where he is going not on how you are giving him aids to get there. Forget feedback you get through heightened senses, don't look for anything back from the horse just focus on what you are telling/giving the horse. Your eyes don't stray from their focus in front of the horse. When you want to turn just look slightly in the direction you want to go and keep focusing. Your body arranges itself and the horse becomes so locked in it cannot do anything else. After a while you are riding by simply "mind games" with the horse. You are concentrating so hard on focusing it doesn't let other thoughts come into it.

To try and give you an example if you were out on a hack (alone) and you started thinking, well over thinking, you would all the time be thinking what is behind the hedge, will we get past this or that, what aids should I give, when, what if he stops etc, what if, lots of what if's. By focusing strongly on a short distance ahead you become so locked in with the horse everything else disappears. You are thinking simply about getting the horse along the road rather than how. You are "doing it" rather than over thinking about it.
When you get the chance try riding in a small area with cones etc on your own and start playing focusing games with the horse. He will miss a few turns to start with but soon he will become locked in to you and you to him and then the only thing you will be thinking about is which cone are you bending around next.

 

[showaddy1]

My 'thing' is definitely the fact I hate not being in control - I'm not scared of the falling off, but the inability to stop the horse when I want scares the crap out of me!
Equi - I completely 'get' what your saying. when I am annoyed because the horse is wimping out/ shying or generally being mareish I have zero fear then. My goal is to work through, and so I forget all about the 'losing control'.

 

[showaddy1]

Paddy555 - I think that's where the problem lays. Don't get me wrong - falls/ fear and my over thinking had left me with an almost foetal position when riding... I desperately needed these lessons, and the instructors 'no messing' approach has got me riding so much better.
I guess, right now I am having (or so I think) to think every little step. I wonder if I now tried your idea with my new improved seat, whether I would slip back to my old ways and lose my position? I can only try it

 

[ester]

really really strong focus. Forget your position and forget, say if you want to turn left, where each leg should be and each hand, and your seat and your shoulders and everything else. Focus so very strongly, hard eyes, look 3 or 4 yards in front of the horse and focus totally on where he is going not on how you are giving him aids to get there. Forget feedback you get through heightened senses, don't look for anything back from the horse just focus on what you are telling/giving the horse. Your eyes don't stray from their focus in front of the horse. When you want to turn just look slightly in the direction you want to go and keep focusing. Your body arranges itself and the horse becomes so locked in it cannot do anything else. After a while you are riding by simply "mind games" with the horse. You are concentrating so hard on focusing it doesn't let other thoughts come into it.

See this is the discussion I have been having recently, because quite a lot of the time my body doesn't arrange itself correctly if I am not thinking about where it should be regardless of whether I think of the end point or not. Physio has been saying that I cannot and will not ever be able to pick up the minutiae of any movement because it is too complicated. This I agree with but I still seem to have to think of a few key points to move correctly.

I don't think I am as bad over thinking riding, but I certainly made huge strides when I found someone who fitted my learning style and was happy go with my overthinking and answer the questions rather than people just tell me not to be like that.

 

[Junebug44]

sounds like great progress in a short time!
My advice here....it sounds simple, but breathing really is your best friend here - through your nose and into your tummy, not your chest. As you breathe out, relax any part of your body that you think you tend to carry tension in.

The nose-breathing stimulates the vagus nerve which connects the reflex part of the brain with the thinking (or over thinking) part, so it's basically a very practical technique to ground you in your body rather than being too much in your head and reaching that point where your instructor has to remind you to breathe!! You'll come to find that your horse responds to you relaxing and as you begin to feel "connected" the canter transition will come much more naturally.

Having said all that....it really does sound as if you're doing brilliantly, so maybe some of the challenge is not to "overthink" your progress and let it just keep happening as it has been!! Good luck and enjoy!!

 

[Equi]

You sound incredibly like me. That is always my fear, and always held me back. No real reason for it but thats how it is. Its just got better with time, lessons and trust. If you don't trust the animal you are riding you won't win.

 

[scats]

Chatting to a friend tonight, as she is an over-thinker when it comes to things like her position. She reads things and gets herself worried if she doesn't feel she's using the correct muscles and she over thinks things to the point that she then tries too hard and ends up riding worse as a result. She then worries because she's not riding as well as usual, so she starts looking into more stuff online and then gets stuck in a rut.

My family have always believed I am on the spectrum. I teach many children with ASD now and see traits of myself in all of them. My brother nicknamed me Rain Man a long time ago! Mine manifests itself in things such as watching and reading the same things over and over again. I will happily watch the same film or TV episode several times in a row, back to back, obsessively. I like to watch the same films over and over, I watch my favourite film at least once a month and have done for 30 years. Mine is obsessions. I wonder if your over thinking is a manifestation of an obsession of getting things right? Or some form of anxiety?

 

[paddy555]

Paddy555 - I think that's where the problem lays. Don't get me wrong - falls/ fear and my over thinking had left me with an almost foetal position when riding... I desperately needed these lessons, and the instructors 'no messing' approach has got me riding so much better.
I guess, right now I am having (or so I think) to think every little step. I wonder if I now tried your idea with my new improved seat, whether I would slip back to my old ways and lose my position? I can only try it

all the hate not being in control syndrome! your instructors no messing approach gave you a focus. Not so much time to think, more a case of doing as they told you.

does it matter if you lose your position or if your aids are not perfect? the aim of riding (in your situation) is to get the horse from A to B whilst keeping yourself feeling happy and confident and "in control" and the horse happy.

Equi was talking about the "you have to go and work boy" the horse by that stage is messing around, all worry about the rider giving the correct aids or position or thinking is gone. All that there is is sheer determination and bloody mindedness. We are doing this, thought has gone, focus is strong.

When you get on the horse start focusing immediately. Get your vision in place, get the determination switched on, your body becomes taut (not rigid) and you find you are sitting up straight. There is far less chance of the foetal position and falling off as your position will instantly be a lot firmer and more adhered to the horse. You will feel stronger. Maybe act as your own instructor. Start talking out loud, firmly, tell yourself, right move off now, 4 strides then halt, another 4 strides then left turn etc. tell yourself, OK obstacle ahead, legs on, really drive him on here, no chance we are going to shy. Great, did that well. type thing,

Fill the thinking space with your forceful spoken instructions to yourself. You may not look perfect but the thing is you will be happier and more confident in yourself and the horse will do as he is asked which is all you really want ATM.

 

[hibshobby]

I'm sorry, but can I be really really ignorant and ask what is ASD ? I have ASD but in my case it stands for Atrial Septal Defect (hole in the heart) which I doubt from the sounds of it is the same thing.
You sound amazing and I wish you all the luck in world - I would just like to know more about your different type of ASD !

 

[showaddy1]

hibshobby- Autistic spectrum disorder... in my case high functioning. People like me are those you think are a little quirky - I guess yrs ago we would have been defined as eccentric. I have slightly higher intelligence... and work as a nurse, with three kids and many animals (collections). during diagnosis it was explained to me as... a person with ASD feels everything in life through every nerve ending in their body - quite often resulting in over stimulation of the senses and resulting in meltdown. Coping mechanisms can be used to keep the meltdowns to a minimum.
paddy5555 - your idea is definitely one I will use, please note - I'm not searching for perfection - but my awful position was resulting in a very confused horse so had to get it sorted for my furry friend to relax. My instructor is the type of person I wouldn't usually 'like', noisy, blunt and driven... but her no frills approach, and straight talking has worked wonders.
Junebug44 - thank you, your absolutely right, I often forget to breathe, resulting in tension all over...
Scats - I have known for many years, my niece was diagnosed young, my sister at 40 - I had all their traits and more. I highly recommend the dcos test for Asperger (online). It enlightening. Don't get me wring, I don't want to be different, I want to be 'normal'.. but I'm not. Hardest thing for me is stopping before I do too much

 

[ester]

It seems everyone else only considers the over thinking to be something to be challenged and overcome by some means? Not something that could ever be worked with instead of against? I find that a bit odd when we are talking about different neurologies. If I try to do that I get more frustrated and anxious and tense. The only reason I have written what I have is that it has made a big difference to me just to 'go with' what I have and finding people who can facilitate that.

showaddy as I said earlier if you are making progess just carry on .