Are all pony clubs full of stuck up people or is it just my local one?

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aliceeventing131

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long rant im afraid!!!!!

ages ago i accompanied a friend (well shes not a good friend, just someone i know) to a pony club rally with her pony, and the moment i got there i looked into the distance and recognized that dreaded big silver horse truck belonging to a stuck up rich girl who i know from school (i completely forgot she was at the same pony club as the person i was with) and though oh damn it!!! no way could i avoid her the whole day, so i thought i might as well be polite and get it over with. After helping the girl who i was with ( ill call her holly) unload her pony i saw the girl (lets just call her lucy) coming over, so i thought uh ohhh (at this point i hadnt got my fab loan horse who i have now, though even having a loan horse isnt good enough and apparently means i cant ride a donkey on the beach) she came over, looked me up and down and said (in the most stuck up patronizing voice ever) oohhh alice i didnt know you would be hear today (holly was with her mom and couldnt hear this) isnt it a bit of a level up from your riding school (might i add that where i learnt to ride, the horses where not run down slow ones and prove a challenge) so i just smile and say im here with hollly, then lucky for me holly comes back so lucy says oh bye then and walks off

later in the day as im watching holly and the rest of the group ride im standing with hollys mom (who is lovely and always says to me she thinks i have my own horse as she thinks i know quite a bit) lucys mom comes over (which is clearly where she gets it from) i get a look up and down from her and she goes through the whole oooh hello didnt expect you to be here today type thing, just like lucy basically -and then we all head out into the cross country course, to walk it whilst ponies rest. im with holly and a few of her pony club friends (parents at the lorry) and we talk about cross country and this girls new horse (expensive push button one) then the girl with the new horse says (and she wasnt treating me like something she'd scraped of the bottom of her shoe) why dont you bring your horse here and i say i havent got one, and boommm!!!!!!!! she starts treating me the same as lucy

ill shorten it now as your probably getting fed up of this rant, but after a few more bitchy comments from 'lucy' about how i could never ride her horse (the horse wasnt a crazed maniac!) i just felt so fed up of everyone looking down at me because i dont have my own horse, i still dont have one now but i have a lovely loan horse who is not a push button ride but we are getting there! just wanted peoples opinions and is every pony club like this!?
 
There are nasty people is every aspect of life, it is hard but try to take no notice of them. Enjoy spending time with your friends and all the horses and ignore the hateful idiots.
 
I went to Pony Club when I was younger and I used to take different riding school ponies from where I rode. No one ever talked to me as I was the only non pony owner there. The instructors were lovely and encouraging but the other pony clubbers left me out and made fun of me or the pony I was riding :( , usually because it was a non clipped native cross or coloured and they were on flashy tb type ponies. I believe different 'areas' had different sorts of people in it but in the one I was in everyone was well off. That was just my experience though ( and 15+ years ago so may be different now). It was sad because I loved going to rallies but felt very lonely.
 
I think it's a bit wrong to ask if all pony clubs are full of stuck up people when you are in-fact on about just one person. One person does not make a pony club.

The pony club my lad goes too is very nice, 99% of the people are lovely. As said above you will always get one or two in what ever you do think they are better than anybody else, or think they know better.

Enjoy your pony and take no notice of this girl, just have a little chuckle to yourself when you do better than her
 
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thanks :) i remember going to try out my lovely loan horse (shes nothing fancy on the outside, but has a heart of gold and id rather have her than any of their expensive push button mounts) and the owner said to me (who is 19 and going to uni) are you going to take her to pony club and i said no! and told her what happened, thank god she agreed with me and we both had a good long rant about how people can be so stuck up these days!
 
Alice,

Clearly here is living proof that having everything material you want, does not make you happy!

This person (like many in life) for whatever reason is not happy, and therefore expresses this by behaving the way that she does.
The need to put others down or make them feel worthless, not all do it the same way, but all can be damaging if you let it.


Enjoy your horse, be thankful that you are actually content with your horse, REGARDLESS of whether you own the animal or not, YOU are responsible for it and treat it like your own.

You, perhaps more than she ever will, will appreciate every step of progress you make, and you will learn.

Life will be full of such people, it is how we maintain our dignity and not get drawn into their need to make themselves feel better that is important.
 
sarah23 said:
I think it's a bit wrong to ask if all pony clubs are full of stuck up people when you are in-fact on about just one person. One person does not make a pony club.

The pony club my lad goes too is very nice, 99% of the people are lovely. As said above you will always get one or two in what ever you do think they are better than anybody else, or think they know better.
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yes, i just couldnt think of a right way to put it, certainly not the whole pony club is like that, it was just that group of people (it was not just that one girl and the other one i mentioned) i was just in such a fury i wrote down random stuff without bothering to check it over to see if sounded stuck up myself!
 
CHH said:
Alice,

Clearly here is living proof that having everything material you want, does not make you happy!

This person (like many in life) for whatever reason is not happy, and therefore expresses this by behaving the way that she does.
The need to put others down or make them feel worthless, not all do it the same way, but all can be damaging if you let it.


Enjoy your horse, be thankful that you are actually content with your horse, REGARDLESS of whether you own the animal or not, YOU are responsible for it and treat it like your own.

You, perhaps more than she ever will, will appreciate every step of progress you make, and you will learn.

Life will be full of such people, it is how we maintain our dignity and not get drawn into their need to make themselves feel better that is important.
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thankyou :) that really means a lot! i do have my loan horse as if it is my own and i couldnt love her more, she may not be worth as much as their horses are but its whats on the inside which counts the most, when i went looking for a pony i said to mom i dont care if its the horse with the highest jump and shiniest coat or best markings, if it dosnt feel like its possible to build a bond with the horse i wont have him
 
I'm sure there is just as many down to earth people, just laugh it off.

Who cares if you 'just have' a loan horse, you're obviously a very cabable reliable kind person where someone else is trusting you to ride and look after their horse and do a cracking job of it too, which is a compliment and a privalige all at the same time.

A horse is a horse, doesn't matter if it's your own that you've bought and paid for or a loan, they all cost the same to keep and they all take as much time and dedication to ride.
 
So, continue with pony club if that is what you want to do, as Kenzo says, there will be many down-to-earthers who have also been spoken to/treated in a similar way.
In my time here on earth - like always finds like!

I am sure not all pony clubs are like that, or everyone in one.

Personally, a parent can buy the ready-made horse all they like - still doesn't mean the child can ride it. Perhaps this girl feels under pressure.


Concentrate on enjoying the time/experience of your horse - rather than wasting your time on their comments/behaviour.
You seem a good conscientious loanee.
 
aliceeventing131 said:
thankyou :) that really means a lot! i do have my loan horse as if it is my own and i couldnt love her more, she may not be worth as much as their horses are but its whats on the inside which counts the most, when i went looking for a pony i said to mom i dont care if its the horse with the highest jump and shiniest coat or best markings, if it dosnt feel like its possible to build a bond with the horse i wont have him
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Loan horse or not, if that horse makes you happy and you have fun then stuff what everyone else thinks.

My first horse was the slowest horse you'd seen and to make it worst he was called Lightning (so i can tell you i took some ribbing) but that little horse was the most fabulous horse there was, he was safe and he taught he all i needed to know. If you horse is right for you take no notice of silly interfering people.
 
Dont take it to heart. There are people like that in every walk of life, not just PC. It sounds like they are the ones with the confidence issues. If you are a great rider with a great horse why would you need to make someone else small.

It doesnt matter whether you own or loan, whether your horse cost £50 or £50,000. There are some nice PC people however. My daughters PC was very 'posh' but she made some nice friends (along with some mortal enemies). She laughs about how at one camp they were enthralled about hearing about her school - where she came home at night, and had mixed boys and girls classes!

The important thing is for you not to allow these sort of people make you feel inferior - although thats easier said than done. As a PC mum who should know better, I often felt a little inadequate in my beaten up lorry, no designer shades and durbarry boots (whats wrong with wellies). And when I mentioned once to lady someone or other that I work full time so often found weekday rallies difficult I got some looks! Ho hum!
 
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ahhh im glad you posted this question as i was going to!!

I went to PC several years ago and it was great, the occasional bitching - but i spose that's down to large amounts of girls together "my horses is better than yours" banter.. but generally it was a lovely atmosphere and me and my old pony got on very nicely with our head down..

however recently, i have witnessed pure bullying going on at the local PC - i have neighbours who both have children that attend. The funny thing is, its not the children bullying, its the adults!!!

My neighbour (one of them) bought a stunning 14hh ISH pony 4 year old for her VERY capable 11 year old daughter.. being 4 he has the occasional blip and by all means he can be darn right awkward and annoying to have around but still, the little girl is 11 and has every right to be there!

He played up once, and the mother over heard the DC and other respectable members of the PC slagging her, her daughter and the pony off!
Its very sad and has sadly got to the point where they will slag the pony of to the little girls face and actually be quite spiteful about what's being said!

This being said, i don't think ALL pc's are like this but every social group in life has the bitchy ones and its just life unfortunately, i learnt to keep my head down and gob shut. i was everyone's friend and no ones enemy, i'd have my own opinion but i never made comment or judgement on anyone else or there pony! <-- best way to be honest!
 
I think that you get horrid/stuck up people in all walks of life.
There will always be people that think they are better than others at something or other.
My mum always used to say that it doesn't matter what you roll up in, it's what you pull off the lorry and what you can do with it.
Have fun with your horse, it doesn't sound like you need to know that sort of person anyway! :-)
 
Oh dear, just let it wash over you and brace yourself for being a parent at a primary school playground (if you have kids when your older :D). I'm reliably informed that this is the ultimate beeeatch-fest :p

I was talking to my friend's 9 year old daughter yesterday. She has riding lessons on the school ponies at our yard. They've got a couple of ponies at home but can't be fagged trucking them over for lessons every week.

She told me she takes great satisfaction when the girls who have their own ponies look down their noses at her. She bides her time and then when the conversation comes round to it she tells them that actually, she has 6 horses at home but likes to ride the school ponies :D
 
There are bound to be stuck up people in any pony club, i know our local one has some! But just ignore them, and be proud of what you have, and just get on with it, people like that aren't worth the hassle, believe me.
 
Ha ha ha sounds like my old pony club (not in Cumbria by chance are you)?! I left 8 years ago and have to say my last 2 years were hell!! Who's got the best horse who's got the best wagon who can jump higher who's won most and so on it's pathetic! What happened to the true days of pony club when you all had a laugh! Falling off in the most dramatic style was an achievement riding the local over weight riding school pony was the but if everyones very light hearted jokes! The pony club camps when you genuinly camped all week and sat round at night cleaning tack!! Those days are very sadly well gone! My last camp and the one that finished it for me was when I stuck in a group of push button horse riders and on cross country day I was more scared of the instructor who was screaming at me from across the field to jump what was a BE open class oxer than the fence itself so I just held on for dear life and jumped it! Thankfully my old girl jumps what's in front of her but there's way too much pressure to be bigger and better than everyone else these days
 
What a shame one person spoilt your day, there us absolutely nothing wrong with having a loan horse, so she is just clearly very insecure to keep commenting on the fact.

As some one else said you can't tar a whole organisation on one person that clearly has a problem with you.

Our Pc is very friendly but am u friends with every one.... No
 
No!! Ours is lovley :). I was worried about meeting people like that at pony club especally as I'm 19 and ride a native. So I did a bit of research and joined the one that I liked the reputation of and had heard good things about. My ride is full of green horses and ponies some very classy others not but we all get on well and support each other when one of us has issues (normally thankful its not us this time ;)). There are a few riders with push button horses and money coming out their ears but they are not the majority and it certantly isnt a competition.
I would suggest you do a bit of research as the closest one isnt necesarily the right one for you, I'm lucky that its not that much diffrent for me. Good luck if you continue to go try to rise above it, it dosent matter that you loan your pony its no one elses business but you and the person you loan him/her from.
 
Haven't read all the posts, but no they are not all like that (thank god!!)
We are at a very small 'working man's 'pc - as we put it!! & I must say not one is stuck up - we are in fact a bit too common lol!!!! A few of our girls (we have no boys!!) get a bit paranoid going to area events as ours always turn up in ratty trailers & end up parking next to the big posh boxes, but they have a giggle & all get on - its lovely!! Being such a small club too is fab as the girls just all hang about together. We live about 30miles from the club area but most of my daughters best friends are from pc.
That girl probably just enjoys rubbing everyone's nose in it, but I always tell our girls, its not what you pull off the box, its what you do with it that counts!! xx
 
Back when I was in the PC we had some right stuck up pushy mothers and snotty children but there were some lovely parents and children there too. It had nothing to do with money either as there were a couple of very weathly familys whos kids only joined the rallies in the holidays and they were lovely!!
It was a bit clique and there was a bit of a 'them and us' attitude with some of the parents which rubbed off on the kids and it was a shame. Saying that I had a wonderful time at the PC, I learnt a lot and my ponies were all old scruffy loan ponies! What is very satisfying is turning up in a rusty lorry, unloading a scruffy freebie pony and then beating everyone and being the 'anchor' on all the teams :p. Other members parents would turn up with their flash landrovers and have champagne picnics out of a hamper and I would have to do with squashed, warm marmite sandwiches out of my mums old leather hndbag and a drink out of the hose :p :D.

You get it everywhere as you get older you will notice it. However what I have learnt is those that shout the most usually have the least. You don't know what goes on behind closed doors, what their family go through, they may have had to morgage their house to buy a flash box and are just trying to make themseves appear to be what they are not. Also money doesnt always buiy happiness, be thankful you aren't one of those poor kids who gets bought an expensive pony and then is made to cry because their family puts them under too much pressure to win with it.

Enjoy your loan pony, make lots of friends and learn what you can, ignore those people and you will be the lucky one :)
 
I was looked down on by the PC test examiner because I a) didn't have my own pony and had to borrow my friends and b) I didn't have a hacking jacket! I turned up tidy and clean but the bitch of an examiner, out of my ear shot, had a word with my totally non horsey mum about it. Seriously I didn't realise that not having a hacking jacket made any difference to my riding or my knowledge. I was about 13 at the time and vowed never to rejoin that stuck up club again (one of the Cornish clubs - can you guess which one??).
 
I had a retired trotter for a bit a d pony club he did it all (mostly at pacing) cross country showjumping games handy hunter everything bar dressage!! BUT I was not allowed to take my C test on him coz he was a pacer but I was allowed to do it on a carriage pony in a driving bit that couldn't jump!! How's that for snobbery!!!
 
I wouldn't worry about it. People who are like that are very insecure underneath!

Our pony club is not snobby at all. There are a few kids on very expensive ponies, but I love it that the few kids that are brave enough to enter the more difficult classes are on the classic pc native ponies.

Having a loan pony is just as good as any other pony and is no reflection of your riding. Get yourself joined up next year and kick her butt!!

If all else fails, just tell her she may have been bought an expensive pony, but she hasn't been taught any manners!
 
Just be careful you're not using reverse snobbery *oh that person is rich, obviously they hav en't ever had any hardship etc etc.*
 
Sounds exactly like my old PC. All little rich biatches with too much money and several ponies at their disposal. I always got looked down on because my NF pony and then little horse were never good enough to jump the big open tracks and we didnt have enough money to buy a fancy lorry. They only bit of satisfaction I got from it was knowing I knew my stable managment and relationship with my horse was better because I actually had to look after my horse where as theirs were all on full livery and they only sat on them at the weekends to take them to rallys and shows (watching some of them trying to bandage a leg was the funniest thing I think I have ever seen).

Just ignore them and know that you are infact a much better rider as you have to ride the horses you have! Unfortunately, you will come across people like this in all walks of life! Sad but very, very true!
 
So you reckon they looked down on you for your abilities, then you do the same back to them for theirs(bandaging). How excellent...
 
I have only ridden loan ponies, as has my sister. She's about to do her B test on her loan ex-racehorse, she did the PC champs on a loan pony and has a crowd of amazing friends who don't give 2 hoots if she's riding a donkey or a 4* eventer...

This year at camp, lots of children had proper local accents (it's a distinctive one!) and rode ponies that most people would look at in a slightly alarmed way. There were also teenagers on horses who must have cost well over £10k. Didn't really matter to anyone at all because everyone got stuck in and had fun. The PC has high standards- you turn out every morning in proper riding gear with jacket, cream jods, pony and tack gleaming. Doesn't matter how old or scruffy your stuff is along as you really try to look good- they have a thriving second hand shop!

If you don't mind me asking, what PC branch was this?

Tbh, you sound you had a rough time. Why your friend didn't stick up for you, or you for yourself bemuses me though.
 
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