Are Horsy People More Rude/Bad Mannered Than General Average?

M

Mithras

Well-Known Member
Joined
18 July 2006
Messages
7,116
Location
The Brompton Road
Visit site
Not to criticise the many polite, friendly, helpful people I know through horses, but compared to the other sports I compete in (athletics, mountain biking and triathlon) and in general life, I do seem to know a lot of horsy people who are just damned rude and think everyone else is there to run around after them.

Last week for instance at a BSJA Intro Show, I witnessed a dog fight followed by a fight between the owners of the two dogs. Lovely. Later I saw the Alsation which had been involved in the fight being led around by perhaps a 10 year old girl and snarling at people trying to warm up. There were hoards of uncontrolled screaming kids running around too. Fortunately most of them went away when the classes went up to 1m. Oh, and I also saw a massive arguement in the horsebox parking - someone had driven off and left "their" space empty and then objected big time to someone else parking in it.

Yesterday at my local show I had to listen to an acquaintence criticising various riders and horses, culminating in her winning the Riding Club Horse on a her megabucks show hunter which had just finished third in the Ridden Hunter. Afterwards she criticised the other people in it and the standard of horse, and when I mildly suggested that most people didn't enter show hunters in the Riding Club Horse because it wasn't a traditional show horse "type" class and it gave the others a chance, I have recieved several ranting texts about it.

In fact so many people just looked so miserable in the hunter class, it makes you wonder why they do it!

Just cannot be bothered with people like that. I love horses but I find the way that a lot of horsy people behave quite off-putting.
 
the way that ive always seen it is that, to have horses you need to be the boss and be respected by your trusty steed so as not to be trampled over, and I think most people who can control a 1/2 tonne animal expect a certain amount of respect from everyone else..

haha I dont think this is making much sence...

what im trying to say is that to have a horse you need to be able to tell them what to do, and when lots of people meet who are used to making the rules, and then have other peoples rules to contend with.. things sometimes get a bit heated.. :D
 
There can be some rude bossy people in horse riding, but i consider myself to be polite and very well mannered, so i guess as with anything in life, there is a mixture.
 
I don't think so. Walk around town on any given weekend, and I think I'd rather be at a horse show amongst the horsey people for sure!

I think that with any hobby or any sport people can sometimes become too involved and obsessive to the point where it starts to become unhealthy and that's when those people start to seem a bit odd. I try to avoid them, but they are everywhere and not just in the equestrian world.
 
i don't think horsey people are worse but i do think BSJA people are!

i made one outing at BSJA and beat a hasty retreat back to BE where everyone is much friendlier!
 
I don't think so, I am a very polite and quiet person, and I know lots of very nice horsey people! It is the same with any person or sport. I know a fair few horrible footballers, rugby players, cyclists, rock climbers etc that are rude, and a fair few nice ones too.

Just like anything in life, just try to avoid people like that :)
 
IMO those with outside jobs have a far stronger awareness of the basic courtesy's afforded to people and those that work with horses can be a nightmare. I realise this is a sweeping generalisation but IME horse people live on another planet when it comes to things like compromise, negotiation,empathy etc and so the list goes on.
I think they have spent too long with animals and have forgotton how to relate to people. :D
 
I have to say I was expecting some snobbery at Royal Windsor yesterday and was pleasantly surprised.

We took an Andalusian stallion for the Spanish class, who was very excited and rearing and neighing alot (his 2nd EVER show-pics up soon) and were expecting looks and comments etc but everyone was genuinely lovely. We had issues getting a board to go on his stable door at first but once that was sorted it was all fine. We were stabled next to a lady competing in the same class who gave us tips and pointers and was really nice. In the ring, he was getting very frustrated and reared a few times (my friend who was riding sat very well!!) and the other competitors (and spectators) were all laughing along with her as she was asking him politely to keep all his feet on the floor!

There was no "OMG ITS A STALLION..STAY AWAY" or anything which is what we had when he won at Patchetts.

It made me completely alter my views TBH.

I completely understand Mithras, I have been places where I have had rows with people who criticised the rider and horse I was accompanying, although now I tend to just glare and make a big point of patting the horse when they leave the arena! Mainly I just go and enjoy myself now and switch off to all the snobbery or laugh inwardly at it!
 
agree with LHS, some horsey people are far better at relating and comunicating with horses than they ever are with people - with the effect that manners, friendly normal conversation etc go out the window! I wonder if because those with horses often have to give up rather alot in terms of time, relationships, socialising and £ it makes them rather centered on the horse and jealous of others who seem to have a better horse, seem to have it easier etc!
 
Frostie652 - yes, I think I know what you mean, they take on the characteristics of a lead horse, which isn't the best for dealing with humans!

So many horsy people seem to be genuine nutters though! And they seem to have so many arguements. And then you get the ones that have retreated from all this, and ignore virtually everyone and you can't even get a polite response when you wish them "good morning".

Goodness knows why equestrian sports have a reputation for attracting posh people.
 
Katie__Connie said:
Haha so true :o :D
Click to expand...

Another ditto from me.

I've had my horse trained by a BS accredited trainer and a Dressage trainer and the dressage trainer won hands down everytime when it came to basic courtesy. All the other one did was try to find out the size of my bank account and would I be up for some fun ?? So so shallow.
 
Last edited:
I think there is a pretty even balance, seems to be just as many nice horsey folk as there does rude/stuck up/better than everyone else kinda sort.

But I think my OH would disagree, he thinks there all crackers, he's obviously spent too much time hanging around the ringsides, warm up areas and sitting in the car snoozing (and bored) in the horse box area or laid out on the ramp catching a tan :D

He said its more interesting in the horse box area, you see alot of strange people doing strange/stupid/dangerous things...he used to say it kept him far more entertained than watching any of the competing. :D
 
happyhack said:
I have to say I was expecting some snobbery at Royal Windsor yesterday and was pleasantly surprised.

There was no "OMG ITS A STALLION..STAY AWAY" or anything which is what we had when he won at Patchetts.

It made me completely alter my views TBH.

I completely understand Mithras, I have been places where I have had rows with people who criticised the rider and horse I was accompanying, although now I tend to just glare and make a big point of patting the horse when they leave the arena! Mainly I just go and enjoy myself now and switch off to all the snobbery or laugh inwardly at it!
Click to expand...

Maybe its better at the bigger shows? Come to think of it, the people I'm thinking of are never seen at the bigger shows because they can't hack the competition/won't jump above 1m, etc..

I've not had rows with anyone! But I'm getting sick of being dragged into other people's petty arguements, hearing their list of bitchy criticisms, etc.. And I really don't appreciate seeing people argueing and fighting at weekends. tbh this is the only sport I've witnessed actual fights and such vicious arguments in. I spent years doing triathlon and running races, and while I'm seen disagreements, they don't usually involve screaming matches and fights! Apparantly I missed most of the bitching yesterday, and was told I must be in a sort of bubble at shows - thank goodness for that!
 
There are some horrors in the horsey world but they exist in every sphere of life. I work in retail and it never fails to amaze me how badly customers talk to the sales assistants. Rude and bad mannered people are just sad little people sufferring from inferiority complexes. Unfortunately when one of these complexes sits on 500kg of horse, it manifests itself at least 3 fold!
 
I think BSJA people at lower levels are terrible for being rude and giving dirty looks at shows and i think it's really clicky, but it gets better by like 1.05m/1.10m! i know people at the show centres i go to at home so have friends to talk to etc, but if i didn't i reckon it could be quite intimidating!
i think it depends what area too. i'm from south london and most people i seem to encounter seem not very nice at first, but then become nicer when they know you more/see you at shows more often. whereas other areas i've been to the people have been really friendly. any show i've been to near my uni everyone has been so nice and came over and spoken to me/asked about my horse!

as for just general horsey people.. we're all a bit weird!
 
This just made me laugh out loud!

From what I've been told, kids' footie takes some beating for rudeness with the aggressive sideline Dad's. Personally, I rate badminton as a sport that attracts normal, well-balanced people. :D

We've just spent the weekend at a 3-day event (OH came 4th woo-hoo!). I got quite chummy with a Dutch girls who commented that the people at 3-day events were generally much more helpful and friendly than at dressage/jumping comps. I tend to agree but I think it's down to the fact that everyone shares the same field for 2 nights and you generally see the same faces time after time – you have to get on really.

Obviously, you do always encounter the «*delightful*» exceptions.........................

- kids on mini quads
- idiot blowing the horn on his truck each time the electricity died
- people who let their dogs poo everywhere and wander onto other peoples' trucks/tents

I think my favourite place for competition rage is the warm-up ring. I hate having to adjust the jumps – it is just a recipe for confrontation. :mad:
 
Having read all the comments, I think the moral of this is to keep yourself to yourself and ignore people at shows (or wherever) if they upset you. Now, hunting folk are very cliquey, but also bizarely, very friendly. All sports attract different types of people. Most horsey folk i know are very hardworking and just get on with it.
 
millitiger said:
i don't think horsey people are worse but i do think BSJA people are!
Click to expand...
How rude :p Not all BSJA peeps are unfriendly and not all BE peeps are friendly. ;)
I have a foot in both camps and the only run in I've had at a comp (in 46 years) was with an 'eventer' :D

Generally though I think equine people are friendly bunch but much like their horses, require a little tact and bond building before a good relationship is established. ;)
 
What winds me up is i do a lot of driving in my job with a lot of it being in the country. I have horses and ride myself, but more often than not when I see a rider on the road, and I slow down , pull over or stop and wait for them, most never even bother to thank you or even acknowledge your existance. Riders then get on forums saying how rude car drivers are because they never slow down or stop. A little bit of courtesy goes a long way. I have taken to saying a sarcastic "thank you" to riders who cannot be bothered to thank people for slowing down.
 
Depends! In think in general it isn't the most friendly welcoming of worlds however, IME when I have persisted with being nice, polite, chatty etc even when people are rude back, if you persist long enough / prove yourself worthy to be there then they soften up and become much friendlier. Due to having this experience I always go out of my way to welcome new riders onto our yard as its hard to fit in at first!
Saying this, I have met some of the nicest, most wonderful friends through horseriding and first impressions havent always stuck with me.
I think in any sport/discipline you have nice people and friendly people and mix in a bit of competition and its a recipe for rudeness!
Im happy just plodding along and getting on with my own thing, I have learnt not to let what other people say/do bother me as its mostly just not worth it, and a lot of the time its down their own insecurities
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top