ARGH! So unreliable!

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peanut0611

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Sorry, but I have to rant.

Every few months or so, I go to see my family in a different country. This time I'm going for 2 weeks over Christmas, and arranged for a friend of mine to take care of my horse for me all the way back in September. I did this because I have very bad experiences with people cancelling on me last minute and wanted to ensure everything was planned beforehand.

I went on a weekend away with my OH for our anniversary in November and gave this friend a trial period with my horse. Everything seemed just fine, horse seemed happy and stable was nice enough (obviously it's never going to be as nice as when you do it yourself, haha).

I'm leaving this Friday and in the past two weeks I asked this friend 4 times whether she's still okay to do my horse. Even on Christmas day? Yes. Even on New Year's Day? Yes. Even though you may have to drive through the snow? Yes. Excellent, I thought.

The dreaded text comes in last night - "sorry cant do your horse find someone else". What?, I ask. "cant do your horse not worth it unfair for me to do over christmas and snow will b problem".

Suppressing my well-known temper I texted back "Look, I'll see you tomorrow morning at the yard anyway. Shall we discuss it then rather than over text?" to which I got the reply "dont b sh**ty with me i havnt done anything ok its just not fair and its not my fault". I left it at that.

When am I ever going to find someone who is reliable and doesn't charge a horrendous amount to look after a well-behaved, extremely tidy, easy mare who has an owner that is (yes, even if I do say so myself) meticulously organised and makes sure the horse has enough feed, my things are all laid out neatly, she has enough rugs and will definitely pay up at the end of it?!

Why do I feel like the only ones I can trust in this world are my animals??!
 
She's at a college and the students take care of full livery... Which just says it all really. Last time I did that (and it really WAS the last time) the poor girl was forgotten about for 2 days! Literally! So I'm not doing that again.
 
I'm really sorry that you've been let down & I can understand why you're angry as how she's done this does sound very *****ty!
Were you paying your friend? If not I do think she has a bit of a point....although she could've told you sooner!

Even when on a livery yard I've never asked a friend to do my horses over Christmas if I've gone away. It's just asking too much of them.
I use a local freelance groom. The bill is always pretty eye watering (especially with 3!) but it's just one of those things. At least I know that they are reliable, professional & giving my horses the exact care I want.
 
What about firms like Animal Aunts. I know they do provide people to care for horses as well as everything else. OK so it isn't as cheap as an arrangement with a freind who might turn out not to be - but it has to be worth it for peace of mind.
 
I'm quite picky with people taking care of my horse. I need to know them and trust them before I let them do her... Even though she's good as gold, an absolute angel, it just puts my mind at ease when I'm halfway across the world.

I was paying my friend, quite a bit actually! I knew it was a lot to ask, which is why I kept checking. I would have totally understood if she said "Could you ask for a member of staff to do her on these days XYZ", but she never did.

I spoke to a member of staff that I trust and like who said she can do her for 1 week, but isn't here the next, so I'd have to organise 2 different members of staff. Luckily I know them all quite well and they should be capable enough. It's not impossible, and I don't mind paying a bit more if it means my girl is looked after well, but it's just so frustrating! Happens every time :(
 
I'm looking after my friends two messy, not easy mares whilst she goes away for Christmas FREE! Isn't that what friends do? Really unreasonable of her to let you down like that :-(
 
Rough idea of county? Perhaps Badgermyers was hinting that if we knew where you were someone reading may be able to help :)
 
That is a real pain for you, I have my horses at home and have a lovely reliable lady from the farm next door who does mine, are there any local yards nearby one of there staff my be able to help! I think badgermyers may be asking where you are as someone on here may be able to help you out. Good luck with finding someone.
 
Angelz said:
I'm looking after my friends two messy, not easy mares whilst she goes away for Christmas FREE! Isn't that what friends do? Really unreasonable of her to let you down like that :-(
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Exactly my point... And the amount of times I've looked after her horse for free because she slept through her alarm again... It's called a favour!
 
Pinkvboots said:
That is a real pain for you, I have my horses at home and have a lovely reliable lady from the farm next door who does mine, are there any local yards nearby one of there staff my be able to help! I think badgermyers may be asking where you are as someone on here may be able to help you out. Good luck with finding someone.
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Thank you :) @Badgermyers thank you very much, I'm just not comfortable with that :S If I'm going to have anyone look after my horse it'll either have to be someone I know and trust, or a professional. Are Animal Aunts any good?
 
maybe she felt she should say yes as a friend but then as time got nearer thought it was a bit much? or maybe she's worried she'll have to spend ages to meet your standards and would rather just enjoy Christmas? personally I wouldn't ask anybody at xmas as I feel it's too much other than maybe share trips with a friend so that I only went once and so did they.
 
peanut0611 said:
Thank you :) @Badgermyers thank you very much, I'm just not comfortable with that :S If I'm going to have anyone look after my horse it'll either have to be someone I know and trust, or a professional. Are Animal Aunts any good?
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Fair enough I know very reliable and professional people around my college as they often look after mine. Guessing you arnt at the same place as me anyway
 
horsesatemychristmasmoney said:
maybe she felt she should say yes as a friend but then as time got nearer thought it was a bit much? or maybe she's worried she'll have to spend ages to meet your standards and would rather just enjoy Christmas? personally I wouldn't ask anybody at xmas as I feel it's too much other than maybe share trips with a friend so that I only went once and so did they.
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That's what I thought. She has a horse at the yard so she would have had to come up anyway, and I repeatedly asked her if she was 100% okay to do it. :S
 
You seem to have an extreme high standard (fair enough) and I think she got a bit daunted by it knowing time is scarce around christmas. Hope you find someone else in time so you can enjoy the 2 weeks with your family too w/o worrying about your horse's care. :)
 
I think she is being very unfair. I don't actually think I would speak to her again.

If she has a Horse up there already, then she will be up daily anyway. Even in the snow, so not sure what the "snow will be a problem" comment was about. I could understand that comment from someone who has no other reason to be at your yard though.

I wouldn't be doing her anymore favors either.
 
LaurenBay said:
I think she is being very unfair. I don't actually think I would speak to her again.

If she has a Horse up there already, then she will be up daily anyway. Even in the snow, so not sure what the "snow will be a problem" comment was about. I could understand that comment from someone who has no other reason to be at your yard though.

I wouldn't be doing her anymore favors either.
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That's what I'm thinking :S It's just frustrating as it tends to happen quite often, people will agree to take care of her, and then a few days before they actually have to put in the effort they bail out!
 
peanut0611 said:
That's what I'm thinking :S It's just frustrating as it tends to happen quite often, people will agree to take care of her, and then a few days before they actually have to put in the effort they bail out!
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I'd imagine it is very stressful too!

I have a lovely girl at the yard who I reguarly do favors for, however she does return them and never lets me down. It is a weight off my shoulders to know there is someone who could do my Horse if there is an emergancy.
 
This is why we never go away. I would never rest. There are companies who do this sort of thing but at a price and I would still not rest so we've never gone down this route.
 
She doesn't sound like much of a friend to me! 'Not worth it'?? What kind of friend demands that favours are made worth their while?

Hope you manage to find someone. My parents live abroad too and I'm spending xmas with them this year. First time I'll have ever left my girls for more than 3 days! Luckily I have an extremely reliable YO who is doing them on full livery and fantastic liveries that will keep and eye out for them.
 
Animal Aunts are excellent - we used them for about 5 years in a row for holiday cover, but just can't afford them now (charge per animal and we have expanded!!).

We always had them living in, so not quite sure how it works if your are looking for a 'groom' rather than live in house/pet sitter? I am sure they will be able to advise....
 
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