Attachment issue.....

[L&M]

I have had my 10 yr old cob gelding since a 4 yr old. He has always been an independent soul, and made sure he hacked/went to events on his own from a baby as didn't want any separation anxiety issues (been there, done it and a right pita!).

He has been kept on a small yard (6 horses), a larger yard (20+ horses), and more recently been kept as a pair with a mare. In every situation he has remained independent. He has obviously hacked out in company too, and attended numerous fun rides with friends, and extensively hunted, so exposed to a lot of different environments and well socialised.

However I recently moved in with my partner, where he was initially kept with the mare mentioned above. Sadly she sustained a tendon injury and was pts in the spring, whereby my partner bought a new horse - a 9 yr old gelding.

My cob has become very attached to this horse, to the extent he loses all common sense when separated from him - he whinnies non stop and if I hack out alone, canters sideways to get back to him. If I attend a lesson or a competition, my cob won't settle or concentrate if my partners horse goes out of sight. Equally out hunting I used to be able to go off with hounds, open gates or lead kiddies off him, but now he just acts the idiot unless his 'friend' is glued to his side making my day very frustrating.

To make issues worse, my partners horse has recently developed balance issues in the trailer and the only way to resolve this has been to remove the partition, and buy separate transport for my cob. He has always travelled really sensibly in a 3.5t, so decided to go down that route again. But now he is difficult to load, spends the whole journey screaming his head off and throwing himself around.

Ironically we have to keep them in adjacent paddocks as my partners horse bullies him, so although exercised together (we also have to ride and lead at this time of year due to limited daylight and work commitments), are not side by side when at rest. The obvious route would be too do everything on my own to get my cob used to being independent again, but that is a. not practical and b. makes us having horses and doing things as a couple untenable.

Tbh the situation is getting so bad that I am considering selling my cob, which is such a shame as up until now has been my horse of a lifetime.

Any ideas before I throttle him!?

 

[Mule]

There was a thread on here recently about using a mirror to help a horse with travelling. The poster also found leaving a mirror with her herdbound horse very helpful.

 

[L&M]

There is a mirror in my lorry, but because of his tantrums and over heating, it fogs up with condensation!!!!!

Normally he would not break sweat when travelling......

But thanks for the suggestion.

 

[be positive]

I wonder if being alone in the field is creating his anxiety, they sometimes miss out on sleep if they don't have another to look over them or the bully could be subtly threatening/ dominant even though they are apart, putting a bit more distance between them in the fields would be worth a try.
It can have the opposite effect to the one you expect because the horse that has been bullied loses self confidence and while you would think he is going to be happy to be alone his doubts creep in and he is relying more and more on the other one.

Is there any possibility of adding a 3rd into the mix, something that can go in with yours to at least see if he settles down again, I would be very reluctant to sell such a good horse without trying a few ideas first as the "problem" horse may be the other one causing the clingy behaviour, I had one that made his companion nervy, any horse that traveled with him was a pain at the competition yet the trouble maker was cool and calm, it took a while to see the pattern.

 

[L&M]

Some interesting ideas there - in the field he seems relatively relaxed, and they are often totally different ends of it with no visible stress. But as you said maybe my chap has lost his self confidence and internalising things......if only they could talk!

A lady who shares our yard has a variety of unridden small ponies, so may have a chat with her to see if one would be suitable to borrow?

I also agree that it maybe my partners horse that is the 'problem one', but can't see my partner getting rid of him either!

 

[Pinkvboots]

I also think it could be because he is in the field on his own now it's made him insecure, a lot of horses will tolerate individual turnout and seem happy when out, but the effect it can have on some can manifest in different ways, I would try and find a way to let him have some company in the field and see if he returns back to normal.

 

[Pearlsasinger]

I like the sound of the small companion, in fact I wonder if both horses would benefit from a companion, although I can imagine that you might be reluctant to try the 'bully' with one. I think like others that although you felt that you were doing the right thing separating the two horses, yours is probably upset because he is on his own. It is difficult when they don't get on.