Awful lesson

Didn't really want to post too much! It was at a riding school as I have a sudden urge to jump and I have never really had instruction - just gone on instinct. I ride a friend's horse but as she has her limits (we haven't found it but it would be unwise and unkind to push too far). I popped a few 1' poles with her yesterday - a better experience than the lesson I paid for today!
 
I used to, where I'd end up in tears. Not because we were pushed too hard or doing too much or because my instructor was awful (she was great!) but because I just couldn't do it that day. Gave up having lessons and it all seemed much easier :D
 
I've not had lessons for a while. I'm going to have some flat lessons on my friend's horse but I really don't want to push her too far with jumping. There is a RS nearer to me than the one I tried today that I avoided for stupid reasons, I think I'll give them a try next and then, if that doesn't work maybe put a hold on jumping until I can have my own again. I couldn't even get this horse into canter. The instructor was kind but I felt rubbish!
 
Ach go else where then. I had been having fab lessons with a jumping coach and then had one with my previous instructor (the last straw!) this instructor made me stay in jumping position all the way round the very small arena and keep going back to trot. My mare when excited bucks into canter. It was completely soul destroying and I was told I was sitting up too fast after the jump (opposite of new good coach!). I nearly was bucked off and I was just so hacked off afterwards I decided that was it and never went back. Jumping 90cms confidently with new coach and horse is not bucking!
 
These fences were less than a foot (ok, I accept she knew nothing about my riding) but I have no idea how this horse could have got over anything larger). I spent so much time keeping the horse moving that I couldn't think about my position - probably says more about me than the horse.

eta: I will try the RS closer to home, I was avoiding it for stupid reasons - I used to be a livery there and felt a bit odd going back without my own horse.
 
I had an awful lesson with an instructor who shouted at me constantly and lost his temper. When it finished both me and my horse were upset and going worse than before. The next time I jumped the horse she nearly fell and stood on my arm. I actually stopped having lessons for a while after that and she came back to form, but now I'm really really careful not to have lessons with shouty egotists.
 
I had a jumping lesson with a instructor a lot of friends were raving about so was persuaded to have a lesson. Can't say exactly what went wrong but they took me back to basics with my jumping position and end result, went home upset and confidence knocked with the feeling that I couldn't jump anymore.
 
It was more that I just couldn't get him going that has upset me. I consider myself experienced (if not expert). He was the 2nd horse they put me on as the 1st one was unsound when he trotted. First lad was much more forward going. Maybe that's the measure of a rider, not if they can control a keen beast but whether they can motivate a plod.
 
My last lesson ended up with me making the decision to sell my horse. Nothing against my instructor, she's seen us at our worst and our best. But she made me realise that this horse is not the horse for me, I'd been feeling that way for a while but deep down I needed someone I trusted and respected to give me their honest opinion, which she did. I don't want an instructor who constantly sugar coats criticism, or telling me i'm doing brilliantly when I'm riding like a sack of you-know-what. She tells you straight if you're doing something wrong, not in a nasty way, but just matter of factly, then explains how to correct it. Sometimes you end up feeling like you've had a bad lesson with her, but after a bit of mulling over it I can usually see where I was going wrong and learn from it.
Once horse is sold, i'm planning on getting something more suitable and continuing lessons with her, she suits my learning style, knows my goals and is helping me get where I want to go with my riding.
 
It was more that I just couldn't get him going that has upset me. I consider myself experienced (if not expert). He was the 2nd horse they put me on as the 1st one was unsound when he trotted. First lad was much more forward going. Maybe that's the measure of a rider, not if they can control a keen beast but whether they can motivate a plod.

Firstly, the first lesson in a new place is often less than brilliant - they don't know you, you don't know them, you don't feel comfortable talking to them because you don't know them, and for safety they'll always put you on the safest, ploddiest horse they own until they suss you out. A new client who phones up looking for a jumping lesson might be perfectly competent, or might be an insurer's worst nightmare - but that said, you'd think they'd suggest a flatwork or even lunge lesson first to assess you, rather than give you quite such a "safety" horse that they've now lost a client!

Secondly, I no longer believe that every ploddy horse in a riding school can necessarily be motivated, no matter how good the rider. Certainly some of them can, but a lot of them would take a lot more than sixty minutes of trying to find buttons hidden after years of ignoring mistakes by beginners! So don't feel bad - we all have bad lessons, and it doesn't mean you're a bad rider!

I'd be completely honest with the new RS - if they know you already it will make life easier, but if not ask if it's worth starting with an assessment lesson and then planning horses and lessons specifically in line with what you want to achieve.
 
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