Being there when your horse id PTS

I'd always said if possible I would stay with my mare until the end.
When It started to look like the end was coming I was really scared that I couldn't do it but, When the time did come it was very calm and afterwards I felt relief that she was no longer suffering and knew it was the right thing. I am glad I was there.
My yard owner dealt with her removal as I couldn't have done it.
I wouldn't have stayed if she had been shot.

Maybe have a friend there to support you and step in if needed.
 
Both me and my OH stayed with our boy when he was PTS earlier this year. I didn't find it frightening just very very sad but somehow peaceful. I sat with with him until the truck came ( I would have found that a bit much) and because I stayed with him and knew how he went, I don't feel any regrets and kinda felt relief. But it is a personal choice and everyone is different.

One of the hardest things for me to deal with was as I led him up the yard after the first injections, our mare who was in the stable next door whinnied after our boy. That really got me :(

Thinking of you at this very difficult time x
 
{{{{{hugs}}}}} for tomorrow.

It's a choice you'll have to make yourself.

I've had 3 horses put to sleep, I was with each one at the end, as I felt it was the least I could do, but as I said, it's a personal decisions, what is right for one, is wrong for the other.
 
Hugs to you. I have always been with mine, I found the waiting harder and upsetting. I seem to be able to cope pretty well in a crisis, Its after I find it hard.
 
When my boy was PTS in October I stayed with him while he was sedated and he was completely away with the fairies. The farmer then held him while he was PTS and I went to see him again afterwards. This worked for me.
Sorry to hear about your boy, but you have given him a lot of good years which he wouldn't have had otherwise. x
 
Thoughts r with u for tomorrow.

I was with my boy at the end, but my 2 sharers were in floods and had to hide in a stable.

He had to b sedated first as they couldn't get tge needle in for the proper drugs. We had made a lively little green space for him, but he kept in the air and landed on sum rubble!! This was far more distressing for me than tge actual deed as I know it was for the best.

I even stayed while the disposal people loaded him onto lorry, as I have seen it done with cattle, and I lifted his head and carried so it wasn't staged over rubble, I couldn't have coped with that.

I would b with them till the end if I had to do it again. Gave me closure.

But def a personal choice.

Xxx
 
My friend and I are both in our 50's, but she couldn't bear to be with Kandy when he was pts last month. She had him sedated first, then we stayed withhim until the vet arrived. She went back indoors, comforted by her husband and I held Kandy's lead rope and talked to him, just looking away at the last second - it was so quick. Don't worry about not being there, hand over to someone else who will not stress out too much.
 
i've held alot of horses for other people and a couple of my own, it was hard to do but i was able to deal with it.
with my horse now though i've already told my OH that it has to be him there as i would upset my boy too much and i don't think i could handle him falling to the floor. my OH will be there and will stay calm and will feed him tons of treats. we've got the 'agreement' with a specific vet as well that it's only him unless it's an emergency.
my kids and myself will say our goodbyes then i will possibly go back and see him after the deed is done.

thoughts will be with you tomorrow, (((hugs)))
 
Sending hugs for tomorrow. If you think he'll be calmer with you, maybe you could feed him yummy treats while he's being sedated, then when he's really sleepy hand him to whoever is with you. Not nice for you, but he won't know what's happening and won't be frightened whatever you decide to do. Thinking of you x
 
You say you are worried about how he will fall. Don't worry, your vet will deal with everything, you will not have to 'do' anything. Vets are brilliant, kind, sympathetic and considerate at this time.
 
My thoughts are with you.
You will be dreading tomorrow, but you may find once it is here, your decision becomes clearer for you and your horse.
My first horse, I couldn't bear to stay with, I was alot younger and in those days the bullet was the only option.
In March, my homebred horse of a lifetime had to be pts, unexpectedly. Both my daughter and I were on the yard. We stayed with him, but the vet had a nurse with him, who held him while he went down. This was the vet's suggestion, and with us being so distressed, we agreed. It was the right thing. He had the injection, which was very quick and peaceful, and having now experienced it, I would use it again. My boy was 16.2hh.
Hugs.
 
I left mine too.... I cried for about a week before, thought I could hold it together at the end, but couldnt.... A very good friend took him at the last minute...
My thoughts are with you, its a very sad time, you are doing whats best for your lad and from tomorrow he can be painfree... sending cwtches x
 
I haven't read any of the other replies so forgive me if this has already been said.

When I have had one of mine pts the vet always gave a sedative IV first before the actual lethal injection.

If you don't think you could be there until the end then perhaps you could stand with him while the vet sedates him and then leave sonebody else to stay until the end.

He will be well out of it after the sedative and won't really be aware if you are there or not.

So sorry you are in this situation and feel for you, hope it all goes as well as can be expected.
 
Supertrooper said:
One thing I'd like to say though, whatever you decide is ask someone to be there when his body is taken away. My friend did it for me when my girl was PTS and I did it for her girl when she was PTS.
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This. I am so very sorry to hear that you will lose your lovely boy tomorrow and I will be thinking of you. Whether (or not) you hold him is up to you and no'one will judge you either way. Please, though, get someone you trust to be with your boy when the knackerman (or whoever) loads him and takes him away - it's not something you want to see and it may help you to know that someone was there to be his "advocate" on his final journey.

Big hugs.

P
 
Gingersmum said:
You say you are worried about how he will fall. Don't worry, your vet will deal with everything, you will not have to 'do' anything. Vets are brilliant, kind, sympathetic and considerate at this time.
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Where is the "like" button . . . OP, I hope this give you some small amount of peace for tomorrow.

P
 
Sorry to hear you have got to have your boy PTS but is sounds like you are doing the best and the kindest thing for him.

Me and my mum were both with my mum's old boy when he was PTS a couple of years ago now. This wasn't planned i advance though, the time just came naturally so we didn't really have time to think about it too much and were in a state of shock. Mum help him in her lap and he went really peacefully. Was lovely to be there with him at the end and have the chance to say goodbye to him properly although very upsetting. I don't regret it though, and if possible I will want to be with my other horse's when they go too.

It really is personal opinion though, and if you feel you really can't cope with it, then don't put yourself through it. Have you got a friend/someone at your yard who would be willing to be with him maybe?

Well done again though for making this very tough decision - you are doing the right thing and are very brave - it's the decision everyone fears having to make and a lot are selfish and can't bring themselves to make this decision because of how much it will upset them, even though it is the best thing for the horse.

Good luck with it all, and feel free to inbox me if you want to talk. :)
 
I don't have any advice but just wanted to say that I'll be thinking of you tomorrow, a horrible decision but you're doing what's kindest for him xxxx
 
Oh no, how horrid, poor baby :(

Every one is different, I could not be there fir my boy, I was in bits , so thought it not fair.

I said my good byes, and a friend ( poor man was beside himself as well ) offered to stay with him.

It is a hard thing to do , do what you feel is right xxxxxx
 
Ps forgot to say, I had to have him shot as vet could not come out, he was already down , so if the vet could have come, perhaps I could gave stayed, but could not do it with my dog. Sounds to me like you already know what you want to do (((( hugs )))))
 
Thinking of you tomorrow. It was right for me and my lad for me not to be there, and I have only really known people who knew the horse but weren't the owner handle them for pts. Having done it for a friend's cat when she couldn't I think I would do it for someone else's horse but am still unsure about if it were mine. Everyone says don't watch him being loaded though, and I think that is good advice
 
So sorry to hear about your boy. I was with my little TB mare a few years ago when she was PTS although it all happened very suddenly so didn't really have time to think about it.

See how you feel tomorrow. ((((hugs)))) for you and your boy.
 
Sad news, I really feel for you. Can't advise, as have never been in this situation . I do agree with those who say don't be there when he is removed though. Will be thinking of you tomorrow, and your boy xxx
 
spottydottypony said:
I want to hold him when he is being put to sleep but i dont think i can physically do it, i cant stop crying and i am an emotional wreck. I really dont know what to do as he only knows me and feels safe with me but i dont want him to sense any sadness or stress. Has anyone else had to deal with these emotions and what did you end up doing.
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I'm sorry to hear your news... :(

All I can say is you're really not alone in worrying about being able to stay calm for him... I'm a 'holder' and am always there for my own and quite often, for other people's be it their animal being pts or kids being reassembled at A&E after an injury... I'm ultra practical (some would say 'cold') but it's just I can switch off and 'do' rather than get over run with emotions... Others can't and sometimes need someone else to step in - there's no shame or anything wrong in being wired to have a more emotional response...

If you think your lad will be distressed by your own distress then have the good moments that you can with him and let someone else step in to keep him company... At the end of the day, the important thing is the decision and you have stepped up to the plate and put his interests first...

Take care...
 
I agree that the lead up is almost worse than the event itself.

I was a mess holding my boy but held it together enough to be there with him til the very end. I had a very good friend of mine there with me which helped (just knowing I wasn't on my own).

It doesn't make it any easier but just know this is the kindest gift you could give to your beautiful boy (bloody hell I am in tears writing this!).

Thinking of you and sending cyber hugs and strength.
 
Thinking of you today. You will know what to do when the moment comes. I was determined to be with mine but couldn't do it when the moment came as couldn't stop shaking and crying so just quietly said goodbye and walked around the corner. Man who did it was lovely and horse was calm and went off quickly and without stress. Don't feel bad if you can't be there. Hugs xxxx
 
Bless you. Thinking of you and your boy today. I stayed with my old lad, hardest thing I ever did, but I wanted to be with him, I managed , just, to keep it together. It was lovely and peaceful, and he looked just like he was asleep. But if you feel you can't, don't feel guilty, not everyone can do it. He knows you love him anyway. Lots of hugs to you, do what feels right for you. xx
 
spottydottypony said:
I am getting my 9 year old boy who i have had since the age of 9 months PTS tomorrow morning. He is badly lame due to joint deformities, i have never rode him and i rescued him from the meat man many years ago. It really breaks my heart to put him to sleep but i have been advised by my vet its the kindest thing to do because he is suffering. I want to hold him when he is being put to sleep but i dont think i can physically do it, i cant stop crying and i am an emotional wreck. I really dont know what to do as he only knows me and feels safe with me but i dont want him to sense any sadness or stress. Has anyone else had to deal with these emotions and what did you end up doing.
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I really feel for you :( Is he being injected??? if he is I must say I would be there EVERYTIME IT was so peaceful them passing in my arms. I would have found it more stressful not being there. The did not stress panic or anything . I would urge you to comfort them.

I was balling at the time but my mare remained fine

Hope it goes smoothly RIP boy run free over the Rainbow Bridge

I was there till the end I checked the truck to make sure it was clean. then went into house/ common room when they were pulled into truck , then I watched the truck drive slowly away.




I would NEVER watch them hauled in
 
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Thank you for all you kind thoughts he has been PTS this morning. It was heartbreaking but it had to be done as he was in pain and loosing quality of life. He was spoilt before the vet came with treats, sugar beet all feed he wasnot allowed due to lami. After he was sedated which wasnot pleasant because he doesnot like needles he was very sleepy. I was with him when he went and my OH held his head. When he was gone i hugged him and told him to go and find my other horses who had passed and go and play with them. I told him how much i loved him. Its going to be hard going to the yard tomorrow but i have two oldies and a baby to look after so i have to go x Thank you everyone it has helped my get through this by reading you thoughts and comments He was injected x
 
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