Being there when your horse id PTS

Have been thinking of you today, I'm glad you found the strength to be with your boy to the end. Take comfort in knowing you have done right by him, and from your oldies and youngster, x
 
well done for making the decision for him and im pleased that it went as well as poss for you.. lots of hugs......time is a great healer.....
 
spottydottypony said:
Thank you for all you kind thoughts he has been PTS this morning. It was heartbreaking but it had to be done as he was in pain and loosing quality of life. He was spoilt before the vet came with treats, sugar beet all feed he wasnot allowed due to lami. After he was sedated which wasnot pleasant because he doesnot like needles he was very sleepy. I was with him when he went and my OH held his head. When he was gone i hugged him and told him to go and find my other horses who had passed and go and play with them. I told him how much i loved him. Its going to be hard going to the yard tomorrow but i have two oldies and a baby to look after so i have to go x Thank you everyone it has helped my get through this by reading you thoughts and comments He was injected x
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This thread has made me well up. It really is an awful thing to have to do but Im so pleased it went well for you and him. You made the right decision for him and to put that infront of your own emotional attatchment makes you- in my opinion and amazing horsewoman......i hope you feel better soon and remember the good times ;) xx
 
spottydottypony said:
Thank you for all you kind thoughts he has been PTS this morning. It was heartbreaking but it had to be done as he was in pain and loosing quality of life. He was spoilt before the vet came with treats, sugar beet all feed he wasnot allowed due to lami. After he was sedated which wasnot pleasant because he doesnot like needles he was very sleepy. I was with him when he went and my OH held his head. When he was gone i hugged him and told him to go and find my other horses who had passed and go and play with them. I told him how much i loved him. Its going to be hard going to the yard tomorrow but i have two oldies and a baby to look after so i have to go x Thank you everyone it has helped my get through this by reading you thoughts and comments He was injected x
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((((hugs)))))
 
Thank you everyone, it has been very painful but i have done the right thing. I miss him and cant stop crying all i want is him back but i cant do that. Thank you for all your kind words it has helped me through by reading them xx
 
My horse broke his leg in the field somehow (no kick wound) and after surgery and months of box rest and walking and confined small paddock turn out when at a check up with lip hook horse hospital they found another break which they expected was there from the first place.

The day this happened I was on the other side of the country at corinors court as I was unlucky enough to watch 2 people crash into a lorry.

As a result I could not be there and they decided that it was the best for him to be put to sleep, at only 3. It broke my heart as there was no chance for me to say goodbye. I wish more than anything I had been stubborn and tell them to hold off until I got back but I did not want him to suffer anymore.

If you have the opportunity to even say goodbye and walk off before they do it as I cannot explain how much it hurts to live with that I did not say goodbye to my beautiful boy. All the best, it's a long road before you'll get over it but it's for the best.

Sympathys x
 
I always wanted to be there when they day came but I fell apart, I was literally a hysterical shaking mess and was carried off the yard by OH, he rightly said it was not fair for me to be such a mess in her last moments. Oh how I wish I could have held it together and been at my beloved girls side.
Do what you can, dont force yourself or feel guilty for whatever choice you make.
I am so sorry to hear that you are having to go through this, it is just awful, big hugs x
 
I could not watch my boy Thomas be PTS. But on Tuesday last week we had are old girl PTS she as 38 and we had her for over 20 year and i stood with my sister while it all happened.
I also seen my old girl candy be PTS and they have all been very peaceful.
It all depends how its being done. X

Thinking about you and your boy tomorrow, I will be keeping you in my thoughts . Massive hugs to you x
 
I was there when my daughters little lad was pts a month ago. I was very very upset, but once I knew that was the only option (he had broken a leg) I managed to hold it together while he went. He had had a lot of morphine anyway so wasn't fully aware of what was going on, but I held him talked to him and stroked him as he went. It was very very peaceful and calm and I'm glad I was there for him. I couldn't face it when my own pony was pts a few years ago and let a friend do it-ive always regretted it. Hugs to you and your pony x
 
I can't read the thread as I still find it upsetting, so will just pop in my experience.

My horse Catembi (in avatar) was very seriously ill, & simply wasn't going to recover. I loved him so much & it just broke my heart. My horses live at home, & I didn't want to PTS at home because I didn't want to have a mental picture of him deceased every time I looked outside.

I dropped him off at the vets on the day. He'd been dropped off there once or twice for xrays previously (unrelated to the illness) so he would probably have thought that he'd just be there for a few hours having xrays & then I'd come to get him again. I gave him a pat & walked away as if nothing was wrong, & waited til we were in the lorry driving away to cry my heart out.

I know that sounds callous on the face of it, but I didn't want him to realise that anything was wrong, & from his point of view, it was the best I could do. It was the most awful thing to have to do, but it wouldn't have helped him at the end to have me bawling my eyes out, and I got to remember him 'alive' as my showjumper.

It is a very personal decision, and you must do what is best for you.

Lots of (((((hugs))))) as it's not fun.

T x
 
I think it's very personal and can understand that some people cannot cope.
I had my first experience of having to have a horse pts years ago when my daughter's TB broke a leg in the paddock. I found that so traumatic - I was hysterical, he kept cantering about, it was just horrific and the vet took an hour to arrive. I couldn't stay whilst he was shot, it was just too much.

I had my beloved mare pts on Friday under different circumstances. I was devastated that it came to this, but the vet gave her pain relief and she had a n hour at grass with the sun shining on her back and a mega grooming session by me whilst she grazed. I had time to say my goodbye and see my mare painfree and at peace, happy in the paddock that she grazed when I first got her. She managed 2 packets of polos and carrots - all those elusive things she was disallowed for 3 months. It seemed an appropriate place for her to end her life and when the time came the end was extremely peaceful and quick.

RIP Crystal and gallop free over Rainbow Bridge xx
 
Mrs B said:
I am sorry to read that. :(

I've always been there and all I can tell you is that the waiting for it is (for me) much, much worse than the doing. If you know in your heart (as you obviously do) that you're making the right decision for your boy, then once the vet arrives it all ticks on from there and adrenaline kicks in: it actually helps me stay calm and cope.

If you feel a sense of relief with the grief, followed by guilt that you felt it, that, for me, is also normal.

And a third time I say, this is just MY experience and everyone's different, but I would always want to be there as the person my horse trusts, right until the end.

I wish you strength for tomorrow and am sorry it has turned out like this.
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Yes you are so right, its your very last duty you can do for them, so chin up think positive it will be over in a second, surely is that too much to ask in its hour of need !
 
Haven't held a horse yet but was there for my Chloedog.

I was in tears and upset, the vets were absolutely perfect-he explained to me in a really calm voice what the injection would do, that she would feel no pain, and then the bits you don't know about til it happens-that she might twitch, she might wet herself, her eyes might stay open. I was prepared for it and it was really peaceful-she did have a few twitches (and she did wet herself) but Chlo had already gone by then-it was just her body left.

The vets then left as I stayed with her for a few minutes more, telling her that she was my baby and I was so grateful for her. I told her that I loved her, and that I didn't want her to be in pain anymore. After a few minutes, the vet nurses brought our puppy in to say goodbye to her-he sniffed her, kicked her and then lay down on her chest. We stayed like that for a bit and then the lovely nurse came in and led me and Bracken out-they removed Chloe once I was gone.

I was really pleased that I stayed with my girl and that I had those last few minutes with her-to say all I needed her to hear. But my OH didn't stay-he waited in the waiting room-and that was fine, too, he hasn't regretted not being there.

She knew how much he loved her-she was a proper daddy's girl on their walks and fun times-him holding her wouldn't have made much of a difference to him-or her.

Gosh, I'm bawling now! I'm not sure that any decision you make could be the wrong one-what matters is that your horse no longer suffers. I also don't think that you shouldn't be there if you're crying-perhaps if you're hysterically shrieking or something.... But I was crying with Chlo, but she knew that she was loved and the room was full of love not sorrow and I think that's different.

Hope you're sleeping well, Chlobear xx
 
The problem is with horses you have known for a long time is they know YOU! my boy always knows when somethings not quite right with me and therefore i think he would pick up on my vibes however calm i appeared outwardly and so i would probably get someone else to do it, the YO is very helpful in these circumstances and as he turns most of the horses out at some or another they do not think there is anything unusual in him leading them in/out of the stable, he always picks a quiet spot and he is calm. It sounds like this happens every week but its quite a large yard and he has a lot of horses there over the years! Personal decision - but whatever you decide must be best for the horse so dont beat yourself up over whatever you do decide - it will be the right thing for both of you - and he will be safe and pain free.
Thinking of you X
 
So sorry for your loss but you've done the right thing no matter how hard it felt. I also had two other horses needing me to pull it together enough to go back to the yard the next day - I don't think I'd have been able to otherwise. I still miss him (he went at the end of May).

I stayed with my old boy to the end. I've cried into his mane so many times in the past that I don't think that me crying really bothered him. And we actually had a lovely couple of hours beforehand in the field with him being characteristically cheeky and making us laugh. The vet was fantastic though - said all the right things and was very supportive.

I think the memory of them lying there dead does stick for a few days but then you forget it again and just remember them from before. And my boy just looked like he was asleep really.
 
I remember reading the "10 horse commandments" that somebody shared on here and this one stuck with me:

- Go with me on the last journey. Never say "I can't bear to watch or Let it happen in my absence." Everything is easier for me if you are there

Makes my heart break, but I think your boy would want you to be there, I think you would regret it if you couldn't comfort him 'til the end. Good luck x
 
RubyFrench said:
I remember reading the "10 horse commandments" that somebody shared on here and this one stuck with me:

- Go with me on the last journey. Never say "I can't bear to watch or Let it happen in my absence." Everything is easier for me if you are there

Makes my heart break, but I think your boy would want you to be there, I think you would regret it if you couldn't comfort him 'til the end. Good luck x
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Whilst I agree that that's a nice sentiment...it wasn't written by a horse. Everyone is different and I can fully understand why some people couldn't be there at the end either because of the emotional trauma or because they just couldn't be there. I believe that the important thing is that everything is done to ensure that the horse's final hours, minutes and seconds are as calm and stress-free as possible and that if the horse is suffering, there is no delay to that being ended, even if it means that the owner can't be there.
 
I've stayed with two of mine that were pts, the first had broken his leg, and having it done felt more like relief than anything as he was in a lot of pain.

The second I'd spent a year trying to get right after a road accident, but he never came sound. The hardest part was having to plan it..day, time etc. I felt awful. But on the day I held it together, and stood with him, I was so so upset after but seeing his body after helped me a lot as once he'd gone down he didn't look like him anymore, no expression, nothing in his eyes, not hurting any more!

Give yourself options, have someone there that can hold him for you if you decide you can't on the day, its a very personal thing that everyone handles differently.

As said above, I wouldn't stay to watch him be moved.

Hugs x
 
NooNoo59 said:
that has choked me up, can you remember the rest?
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Ten Commandments for Horses
* 1. My life is likely to last 20 or more years. Any separation from you will be painful for me. Remember that before you take me home.
* 2. Give me time to understand what you want from me.
* 3. Place your trust in me. It is crucial to my well being.
* 4. Don't be angry with me for long. Don't lock me up as punishment. You have your work, your entertainment and your friends. I have only you...
* 5. Talk to me sometimes. Even if I don't understand your words, I do understand your voice when it is speaking to me.
* 6. Be aware that however you treat me, I'll never forget it.
* 7. Remember before you hit me that I am powerful enough to hurt you, but choose not to.
* 8. Before you scold me for being uncooperative, obstinate, or lazy, ask yourself if something might be bothering me. Perhaps I have a problem that you are not yet aware of.
* 9. Take care of me when I am old. You too will be old one day.
* 10. Go with me on the last journey. Never say "I can't bear to watch or Let it happen in my absence." Everything is easier for me if you are there...
 
I had my two best pals there for support. The vet held my boy when he was injected and my pals just hugged me while he went down. Once he was gone I went back to him. I think the vet had him for safety reasons so she could see which way he was going to go. It's difficult but you are doing the right thing and as you know the horse from a youngster I'd be there to reassure them. Hope it goes ok and be strong xx
 
Have someone there as back up. See how you feel on the day & dont feel pressured. Its a terrible thing to have to do but remember you will in time feel better knowing that he's no suffering. Best wishes, hope everything goes smoothly for u x
 
And ps. That 10 commandments is very sweet but also sloy of made up crap. Dont be made to feel guilty by that rubbish.....that's all it did for me :(
 
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