Bit despondant - words of encouragement please!

arwenplusone

arwenplusone

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Joined
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I am just SICK of falling off.
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The saga with my mare continues. Sometimes she is an angel & when jumping she will fly anything I put her at (even ditches/big drops) - she makes it so easy.

However, she is sooo difficult at the moment it is untrue. A few weeks ago she was napping really badly, but I worked through it pretty well and she has realised that she can't get away with it. But now, she is just using 'spooking' as a form of evasion. She is really sharp and can be going the opposite way flat out & broncing within a nanosecond. Sometimes I can stick to her like a limpet but other times I have no choice but to bail. Like this AM. Usually I bounce, but today after her fourth big spook I landed funny and hurt my hip
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I got back on but she spooked twice more & I ran out of time! so I only had time to do about 3 good strides of trot before I had to stop.

So, can I have some hugs please! I am persevering with this because she is an awesome horse and I am pretty sure I can work through it (she is only a baby). I have a new instructor coming out on Sunday so hopefully she can help me.

But I have been off her 12 times in the last month.
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today it has got to me a bit
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Oops - bit of a long post! Gin if you got this far....
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PS - before anyone says anything she has had everything checked and is on regumate - I think she has ADHD
 
Oh naughty naughty pony!!!!
((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))
stick with it and u will come through the other side!!!!
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((((((((((hugs))))))))))

TWELVE TIMES IN A MONTH
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Even for a baby that is excessive. Good God Arwen, something is very not right - it is only a matter of time before you get properly injured honey
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OK, if she was mine (apart from hitting the bottle) I would send her to someone for evaluation to discover whether she ever is really going to be consistently rideable - and then work together to discover whether she is ever be consistently rideable by you. I am not saying you are not capable, I am fully sure you are more than capable, however, something isn't right and you may just not be compatible together.

I do hope you get to the bottom of it all - she is a lovely looking and moving animal and I know you have great plans for her, but please take care of yourself x
 
Ouch
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((((hugs))))) Hope you're not too stiff later.

It's a bit early for gin for me, so I'll stick with my tea
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She's a beautiful girlie, and I'm sure it'll be worth it in the end. She must be running out of evasions to try by now...
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OMG you poor thing, really hope you are OK!!

I really admire you for carrying on and hopefully sometime soon you will both click together. If its any consolation I fell off my boy in walk
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dont ask
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but for people who didnt see it I said he put in a massive spook and I had no chance
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Youve prob tried this but do you lunge before you ride to get some heat out of her etc? Soz prob teaching you to suck eggs
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Oh dear, poor you and your poor body parts!
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I think part of your mares problem is that she knows how to get away with things, therefor if she starts broncing, she knows she'll get you off and the more she gets you off the more she'll do it
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I can hear my trainer shouting at me, "don't let him/her get away with it, pick his/her head up, give it a kick and make the work harder, get his/her attention back". I know, I know, easier said than done but I do believe she is taking the P out of you.
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Hugs for you (((((((())))))))
 
Poor you - you must have nerves of steel though to keep getting back on so many times! I'm sure you'll work through it in the end and she will be worth it. Will you keep her for yourself or is your plan to sell her? Good luck with your new instructor - I hope your hip feels better soon {{{{hugs}}}}
 
My lad was exactly the same as a youngster - don't thinkthere was a day in the first month I didn't come off him and went to casualty 13 times that month!

He used to do it as soon as anything got difficult - like cantering a 20m circle
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all of a sudden he grew/strengthened out of it and has gone on to be competitive at Foxhunter level and Medium BD - he's 19 now and still has his moments though
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Ouch!

I agree with Weezy totally. Send her to boot camp (a decent one, a real nagsman not just one that has letters after their name and can ponce around in circles) At least then you will know whether they can iron her out or not.
Please do it before you get hurt!
 
Ditto this and Weezy's post. IF you are falling off her regularly then the most consistent lesson she's learning at the moment is that she can buck people off. And she'll keep practicing it!!!
 
In my eyes you are incredibley brave! Is it the horse in your signature? She is beautiful I can see why you are perservering.

Is it possible that as a baby she has a lot of energy and is learning that by leaping she can evade work? Have you tried lunging her to get rid of any excess energy and then getting on.

Also working them after they have been turned out as youngsters can also really help as they tend to get to tire themselves in the field.
 
crikey, 10/10 for perseverance. hope you're not too sore!
umm, right, sorry if you're doing all this already, but first things that come to mind...
have you tried a completely different saddle on her? i know you say everything's been checked, but a different saddle would have different pressure points and would feel very different to her. got to be worth a try, would be the first thing i'd do.
when she thinks a naughty thought (well, i'm assuming she tenses up before she starts, but maybe you get no warning at all?) try a really loud definite "WALK ON", i've found with some mares that can be enough to get their mind back on the job and remind them of their manners. or, sit passively and wait her out if she roots herself, waiting for your leg to give her an excuse to start bucking, just use your voice, at least for a while.
if she does start bucking, i hope you give her a real yank in the chops to get her head up. i'm sure i'll probably be accused of cruelty, but the fact is that it's not fun, you could get hurt, and she isn't allowed to express herself in that way once you're on top.
right, some people will possibly think this is really cruel, but it worked for me.
i had a gelding who was very bright and sharp, and who, unbeknownst to me, had been dropping people left right and centre (while i was away at uni). i came back, took him out for a hack (no-one fessed up to his antics due to embarrassment at their lack of stickability, it emerged later!), and halfway across the first field he started his rodeo show and dropped me on about the 5th buck. i had kept hold of the reins, and i totally lost it, and proceeded to yell at him (something along the lines of "Don't you DARE drop me, who the **** do you think you are" etc etc, and smack him with my whip on the chest and shoulders. I am not proud of this now, btw, but i will say that it seemed to teach him that his actions had consequences, and i swear that he never ever did it again, with anybody. he became the most straightforward and forgiving horse.
when schooling, we teach them that action = consequence all the time, so don't do it in the first place. this was just a more dramatic version of that i guess.
very very best of luck, i hope she matures quickly and stops all these horrible antics!
 
Take care because this could get silly over time...as siennamum says. Do you think she is bored and using her idle mind to play up? I presume she does it in the school when you are working her? It really is hard because they can turn so quickly...my lad used to do it, one minute fine and the next spooking, spinning, bucking for no reason whatsoever. I got some help from an instructor that was good at sorting naughtyness out and he has been very good ever since...not perfect but enjoyable to ride at least! My lads problem was this boredom in the school so I guess he just played up to get out of working...sometimes horses can be like that especially when they are young. Have you considered getting someone else to ride her or even going into the school and throwing so much at her that she does not have time to think...that worked for me. A change of direction, turn, transition every three strides until they were listening and totally switched on...might be worth a try but I don't know how young she is or where you are in your training wth her as to whether she is up to it.
 
(((((hugs)))))). I agree with Weezy. Get a professional to help as all she is learning at the moment is that she can get you off. She may be beautiful and talented etc, but sadly not every horse like this has the right attitude.
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Ah - thankies everyone! Feel better already
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MFH_09 & Weezy - Thank you , kind words & good advice. I have considered this and will be looking into it - trouble is I don't know of anyone up here I would trust! I *might* send her to the Yorkshire Riding Centre (Chris Bartle's) but I don't think I can get him to ride her and I would need to be really confident in whoever does!

To answer others - she is a 5 yr old (the bay in pic 2 & 4 of my siggy) She was backed, turned away to have a foal and then imported. Last year she was horrible and when I took her to the vets she had a uterine infection. After that she got better but now is worse! She has no infection/cysts and she's been on the regumate for 3 weeks. (hasn't made much of a difference)

She isn't a 'fizzy' horse as such, with excess energy, she is just a work-shy one and I think she is trying all the tricks in the book. Each time I get over one she comes up with another - too many brain cells.

Just makes me feel like I can't ride!
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Kerilli - thanks for the reply.
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I did try the yelling (believe me I can yell at her quite a bit when she dumps me) It's so frustrating. But I'm not sure it works for me when I am on the ground.
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Yelling/growling when I am on board does work sometimes though...
 
Hi hun,

First thing I would do if you want to persevere yourself is cut out all her hard feed COMPLETELY and turn her out 24/7. Particularly if you're riding in the mornings when she's been stood in all night and feeling fresh! You might find it just takes the edge off her. My stupid 5 year old was 200% better when he was living out.

However if she was mine I would send her away for a while. In fact I'd probably have done it long before now, I'm in awe of your guts to keep getting back on time after time!! I do agree with those who say she's probably learning that she can get you off, and yes she might grow out of it, but equally she might not and it would be such a shame to have a beautiful talented horse that you can't ride! I can give you a couple of names of people you could try at YRC, both advanced instructors and good jockeys - I'll PM you if you like?
 
You could try someone like Peter Richmond or Tony Walker, they're both up your way and would give you an honest answer too as well as being very hard for her to shift! Another place to get recommendations from could be your local Hunt Secretary; most of them will know decent nagsmen. Some of them may not be BHS approved style but they do get decent results and if they can sort her out to be a decent riding horse for you does it really matter what they look like?
Another thought, is she just like this in the school or also while hacking? If it's just in the school I'd give it a miss and let her work while she's hacking, might be another thing to try. She is still young, she's been in a field for the best part of her life with nobody to tell her what to do; it's bound to be hard for her to adapt if all she sees are four sides of a school. (not getting at you just putting things from her point of view!)

Good luck because nobody can say you aren't trying your best with her.
 
ah, the fact that she's had a foal is very telling. i've known mares in the past who got very big for their boots after having a foal when fairly young, kind of "i've been a mother, i've done all that on my own, so how DARE you try to tell me what to do" kind of thing.
i think she needs taking down a peg or two to be brutally honest, she is not cleverer than you and needs the notion that she's bigger and stronger dispelling from her mind... she is an absolutely cracking sort, and i'm sure she'll be amazing when she knuckles down. unfortunately all that athleticism and power used against you is not fun at all, when it's channelled, it'll be amazing.
have you thought of trying Nupafeed? i'm about to start my mare on it after a friend had spectacular results with her horse on it, i'd have a chat with them, they're very helpful. got to be worth it not to hit the deck again! it's a magnesium compound that rebalances their system, settles their nerves etc. got to be worth a look.
*big hugs* best of luck.
 
Who trains you Arwen?

Is there no chance you can send her away for some schooling for a couple of months and get her assessed really really well?

12 times in 12 months would honestly start making me question things a little bit. Its all well and good saying that you usually bounce but what happens when you dont?
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ah, the fact that she's had a foal is very telling. i've known mares in the past who got very big for their boots after having a foal when fairly young, kind of "i've been a mother, i've done all that on my own, so how DARE you try to tell me what to do" kind of thing.
i think she needs taking down a peg or two to be brutally honest, she is not cleverer than you and needs the notion that she's bigger and stronger dispelling from her mind... she is an absolutely cracking sort, and i'm sure she'll be amazing when she knuckles down. unfortunately all that athleticism and power used against you is not fun at all, when it's channelled, it'll be amazing.
have you thought of trying Nupafeed? i'm about to start my mare on it after a friend had spectacular results with her horse on it, i'd have a chat with them, they're very helpful. got to be worth it not to hit the deck again! it's a magnesium compound that rebalances their system, settles their nerves etc. got to be worth a look.
*big hugs* best of luck.

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On the positive side, the difficult ones like this are always the cracking ones, once you sort them out. I agree with Kerilli - often mares become much more independent after having a foal young, and 'need' you less...my old TB was the same.
I'd agree - cut out any hard feed, give her only forages such as hay, haylage, maybe unmolassed sugar beet and chaff. Turn her out 24/7 and don't rug her too well...let her burn off a bit of energy keeping herself warm in the field. If you can put her in with a bossy mare, and some youngsters it would be ideal
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Change the tack...even if you think it fits.
Make sure you have a good neckstrap (a breastplate will do), hat, back protector, and no clothes that could catch on the way down (stating the obvious, I know
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) And be prepared...when my mare was rearing me off...I thought 'ok, I may come off, but I'm going to be smacking at you all the way to the ground'...
Lunging her may be a good move, when she bucks, send her strongly forward with your lunge whip...generally I've found it is better to send buckers on into gallop if necessary, rather than let them stop and arch their back for more 'twang'
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If you feel it is getting too much for you, then find a trainer to send her to...it'll be worth the expense in the long run.
Alternatively, you could just play NH games with her for a couple of years, then advertise her on Project Horse....
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Alternatively, you could just play NH games with her for a couple of years, then advertise her on Project Horse....
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Sorry but PMSL, that sounds like about 3 people on my yard at the moment!!
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Seriously though I think Shilasdair's advice is very sensible...
 
Someone else mentioned riding after shes been turned out rather than before. I used to have to do this with my gelding else he was a little sh*t :P

Interestingly, mine responds much better to being yelled at than he does to being smacked (and he CAN be really really bad). Mine uses spooking as a way to evade work when hes feeling sharp and he goes from quiet to full on gallop and bronching in a split second. I had a lot of comments about it this winter as the livery im on hadnt seen that side of him. They'd all ooh'd at the work he IS capable of but hadnt seen his more unpleasant side.

Smacking my horse does nothing but makes him rise to a fight. Jack firmly believes that no one should hit him and hes well prepared to face upto you if you do. I was always taught by my trainer in the UK to avoid confrontations with him because he was always walking a fine line between naughty and downright dangerous.

Its really hard with the horses that give very little warning... i know :*(

Luckily, mine settled down of his own accord over winter and im 99% sure he'll be better as soon as he's moved and can go out more.

If its any consolation at all, when hes working with me, his work is astounding because the same streak that gives him his naughtyness gives him quite amazing presence.
 
I have a very very similar situation with my 5 year old who has had me off a lot and goes from safe as houses donkey to crazy demented bronking loon in 0.5 seconds. I kept getting back on and persevering but now I have a broken shoulder thanks to him he is with the professionals for 6 weeks. Has destroyed my bank balance but hopefully it will be worth it as he is gorgeous and I love him and when he works well he is amazing and so talented but not easy and I too am pretty depressed so sympathise with you x
 
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