Bloody Sharers!!!

Well you could try paying someone to turn your horse out like hundreds of others on livery yards do..... :rolleyes:

It is posts like this that mean that this particular very good sharer will never share a horse again and will continue riding at a riding school until she finds a horse of her own. Too many people expect it to be a complete one way street with sharers, are quick to moan and critisise and fail to recognise what the sharer does for them.
 
sorry if i am missunderstanding but surely before you let her share your horse, it should have been your responsibility as an owner to make sure of her capabilities as a rider to make sure that no harm was going to come of your horse while ridden, unfortunately it does not sound like that is the case, so therefore it is technically your problem that the horse is now not jumping, if you never done the proper capability test, i bet everyone else with a sharer checks to see if the person who wants to share their horse can actually ride and care for the horse
 
FullThrottle said:
Queenbee I suggest you take your offensive opinion elsewhere, the ONLY reason he stopped was her awful riding, and I now have the knowledge that another livery saw her trying to jump him and she has said how shockingly badly my sharer was riding, I cannot give her the boot until I find another sharer as I will not have my pony standing in all day on the days I work late! Hence my reason for having a sharer in the first place! If the person is to a standard where they can ride well then they will be allowed. To jump etc, the reason she is not allowed to is because she is not capable.
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Ok if she wasn't supposed to jump, she wasn't supposed to jump. But why on earth did you allow anyone who rides "shockingly badly" to share your horse in the first place?? I think abit more time spent vetting your next sharer and actually picking someone who will suit your horse will save some heart ache all round.
 
FullThrottle said:
Queenbee I suggest you take your offensive opinion elsewhere, the ONLY reason he stopped was her awful riding, and I now have the knowledge that another livery saw her trying to jump him and she has said how shockingly badly my sharer was riding, I cannot give her the boot until I find another sharer as I will not have my pony standing in all day on the days I work late! Hence my reason for having a sharer in the first place! If the person is to a standard where they can ride well then they will be allowed. To jump etc, the reason she is not allowed to is because she is not capable.
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So if her riding is that shocking, why do you allow her to ride him? Sorry but to then say you can't boot her out till you find someone else is awful, if she is that unreliable then surely your pony is left in some days. If I can't do my horses for whatever reason then I pay a responsible professional to do them for me. Perhaps you should consider this option rather than some sort of free labour, most decent riders would expect to be paid.
 
Grr this makes me angry!

I'm a sharer and a good one at that. I wouldn't do anything her onwer wouldnt want me to do, but then again if there are any problems she lets me know as soon as she can. She does not leave it be, slag me off and bitch about her on a public forum!

Grow up woman and get a new sharer who you prefer and she can find a good enough person to share with
 
FullThrottle said:
Sorry for confusion she was returning the money I lent her last week for lunch rather than paying for sharing, she has yet again let me down for today and tomorrow although this time has given me notice, u am on the look out for another sharer now and as soon as one is found, (although at this time of year not as easy as in summer) my current sharer will be told she can no longer share Pluto.
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I am looking for a share,people are out there.
I would not,however,do anything other then run a mile from someone who rants about their sharer on a forum instead of talking,calmly to them about issues.


FullThrottle said:
Queenbee I suggest you take your offensive opinion elsewhere, the ONLY reason he stopped was her awful riding, and I now have the knowledge that another livery saw her trying to jump him and she has said how shockingly badly my sharer was riding, I cannot give her the boot until I find another sharer as I will not have my pony standing in all day on the days I work late! Hence my reason for having a sharer in the first place! If the person is to a standard where they can ride well then they will be allowed. To jump etc, the reason she is not allowed to is because she is not capable.
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A share is NOT the owner doing the sharer a favor,and a good sharer does not need to put up with that short of shite.
If it is going to work,then the agrement must work for both and it sounds like you need a sharer more then the sharer needs you-so a little kindness would not go amis;)

If you intend to end the share do it NOW and pay your YO to tun your horse out like anyone else would.
Or,if your attitude has not prevented you making any,ask a friend at the yard to turn your horse out for you.
 
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Sounds like she was never the right sharer for your horse. Why did you take her on in the first place? I've done a couple of shares and there has always been a trial in place to make sure everyone is happy. Maybe you should pay someone to turn out or excercise and then you wouldn't have a problem. If the sharer is so much of a liability why do you not get rid and pay someone....

I share because I can not commit to a horse full time. The owner is aware of this and is able to do the horse 24/7 if need be. We work round the days I can do and I expect her to come to me if she has a problem with the way I handle the horse/ ride her etc. Likewise if horse is being a bit odd (she's very sensitive) for example pulling back when saddle goes on i will tell the owner and we will sort it out together. No blame is put on anyone. Horses are horses there behaviour can change due to the slightest thing!

I guess what I am trying to say is trust works both ways. I would hope that the owner would NEVER b*tch behind my back but say whatever she has to say to my face. I would expect the owner to understand the situation I am in as well as vice versa.

I would love to hear this story from the sharers point of view.
 
so to sum up.

a. all sharers are 'blo*dy sharers'
b. Sharer is not to ride my horse like a novice, though I know sharer is a novice.
c. will allow horses hooves to grow long so cant be comfortably jumped, but if horse stops at jump its not horses fault or mine but bl*ody sharers.
d. will continue to use bl*ody sharer as free horse carer even though she doesnt do it properly and is unreliable, as it is convenient for me.
e. will continue to let novice blo*dy sharer to ride my horse and look after it until better blo*dy sharer comes along when I will unceremoniously dispense of novice bl*ody sharer.
f. whilst looking for new shiny sharer, will publicly slate current bl*ody sharer online and hope someone new will jump at the chance to ride my horse as Im such a nice person to share with.

??????????????????

The moral of this story? VET your blooming sharer!!! Make sure sharer is competant enough to ride your horse as you would. Make sure it is someone reliable and experienced. Watch sharer ride. Theres no way I would share my pony with anyone I didnt 110% trust. No way.
Oh, and make it someone you actually like too. It helps.
 
Hey speak for yourself - not all sharers are bad!

i know for one when im sharing a horse i have the up most respect for the owner of the horse who is giving me the oppertunity to have a horse to ride.

plus, i wouldnt go and share a horse that wasn't meant to do something i obviously wanted to do!
 
artysteph said:
so to sum up.

a. all sharers are 'blo*dy sharers'
b. Sharer is not to ride my horse like a novice, though I know sharer is a novice.
c. will allow horses hooves to grow long so cant be comfortably jumped, but if horse stops at jump its not horses fault or mine but bl*ody sharers.
d. will continue to use bl*ody sharer as free horse carer even though she doesnt do it properly and is unreliable, as it is convenient for me.
e. will continue to let novice blo*dy sharer to ride my horse and look after it until better blo*dy sharer comes along when I will unceremoniously dispense of novice bl*ody sharer.
f. whilst looking for new shiny sharer, will publicly slate current bl*ody sharer online and hope someone new will jump at the chance to ride my horse as Im such a nice person to share with.

??????????????????

The moral of this story? VET your blooming sharer!!! Make sure sharer is competant enough to ride your horse as you would. Make sure it is someone reliable and experienced. Watch sharer ride. Theres no way I would share my pony with anyone I didnt 110% trust. No way.
Oh, and make it someone you actually like too. It helps.
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:D:D:D

As a novice bl*ody sharer, this thread makes me realise how lucky I am ...
 
FullThrottle said:
Queenbee I suggest you take your offensive opinion elsewhere, the ONLY reason he stopped was her awful riding, and I now have the knowledge that another livery saw her trying to jump him and she has said how shockingly badly my sharer was riding, I cannot give her the boot until I find another sharer as I will not have my pony standing in all day on the days I work late! Hence my reason for having a sharer in the first place! If the person is to a standard where they can ride well then they will be allowed. To jump etc, the reason she is not allowed to is because she is not capable.
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I totally agree with your reasoning to let a numpty incompetent sharer share your horse for the time being because you haven't got time to take care of it. How clever and responsible of you to let it continue! How very responsible to have never watched your sharer ride before and have to be told by another that she couldn't ride, surely a responsible owner would have fully tested her sharer before letting her NEAR HER HORSE!

As far as I can see you are just as incompetent and irresponsible for allowing it to go on, regardless of "why". No circumstances would make me put my horse in the care of a numpty once I knew how bad they were, end of! Pay someone to care for your horse, ask if you can pay another livery to do it. If you are happy to let it go on, stop moaning, what do you expect people to do, pat you on the back and say 'there, there?!' Turn your flipping pony out to grass if you can, there are always ways,

Choice 1: continue to let pony to be messed up
Choice 2: Be responsible and find someone else to help in interim (how about YO)

If you continue with choice 1 then you are to blame for you pony being ruined because you knowingly let an idiot who is incompetent continue to handle your horse. so you have no right to moan.

I have no sympathy for you or your sharer in this one: just your pony
 
Yunalesca said:
I am looking for a share,people are out there.
I would not,however,do anything other then run a mile from someone who rants about their sharer on a forum instead of talking,calmly to them about issues.




A share is NOT the owner doing the sharer a favor,and a good sharer does not need to put up with that short of shite.
If it is going to work,then the agrement must work for both and it sounds like you need a sharer more then the sharer needs you-so a little kindness would not go amis;)

If you intend to end the share do it NOW and pay your YO to tun your horse out like anyone else would.
Or,if your attitude has not prevented you making any,ask a friend at the yard to turn your horse out for you.
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Methinks FULLTHROTTLE has just made herself look a stark raving large big plum!

*snorts on keyboard and trundles off for ciggy*
 
artysteph said:
so to sum up.

a. all sharers are 'blo*dy sharers'
b. Sharer is not to ride my horse like a novice, though I know sharer is a novice.
c. will allow horses hooves to grow long so cant be comfortably jumped, but if horse stops at jump its not horses fault or mine but bl*ody sharers.
d. will continue to use bl*ody sharer as free horse carer even though she doesnt do it properly and is unreliable, as it is convenient for me.
e. will continue to let novice blo*dy sharer to ride my horse and look after it until better blo*dy sharer comes along when I will unceremoniously dispense of novice bl*ody sharer.
f. whilst looking for new shiny sharer, will publicly slate current bl*ody sharer online and hope someone new will jump at the chance to ride my horse as Im such a nice person to share with.

??????????????????

The moral of this story? VET your blooming sharer!!! Make sure sharer is competant enough to ride your horse as you would. Make sure it is someone reliable and experienced. Watch sharer ride. Theres no way I would share my pony with anyone I didnt 110% trust. No way.
Oh, and make it someone you actually like too. It helps.
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And all sharers be sure to VET your horse owners to be sure they haven't had a lobotomy ;)
 
queenbee said:
And all sharers be sure to VET your horse owners to be sure they haven't had a lobotomy ;)
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Lol :D There should be a standardised quiz for this that trips up even the cleverest owner who hides the loony well. Then 2 months into the share they don't flip out and turn on the crazy at the poor bloody sharer :p

(Jokes, not all owners are loony. Just most)
 
TBF QB,the OP does not say anywhere how old sharer is or that she is a prat-the word used is novice.
A novice will make mistakes and do silly things,part of the learning process-once again though,tis up to OP to make sure things are done to her liking.....

FWIW,my first concern would be is the share learning to do things properly with an owner who clearly gives no suppport :o
 
I cannot give her the boot until I find another sharer as I will not have my pony standing in all day on the days I work late!

The way i read this bit is that you are ''using'' your sharer!!
Damned sure if i found out i was being ''used'' i would not be amused.
 
OP - I was at one point thinking of taking on a sharer, but I know I would be so particular with my girl that I'm not sure how it would pan out.

I'd much rather have my pony standing all day (can she not be turned out?) than have someone ride her who is not experienced enough to handle her and therefore going to undo all of the hard work that I have done.

To keep a sharer on, when you are actively looking for another one, and yet not having the courtesy to tell her what you are doing, is wrong IMHO. Surely it would be best to have a quiet word with her, let her know what your concerns are, and see if you can sort something out? If she is as unreliable as she sounds, then you would be better to tell her that it is not working out as your horse needs someone more experienced.

What was her reaction when you told her that she shouldn't be jumping him anyway?
 
Mishaspey, don't let this post put you off getting a sharer. It may not be easy to track down experienced sharers but they are out there.

A girl who has lessons in the same group as me at the riding school used to share with a girl who worked at the yard. The sharer was actually more experienced than the owner and improved the horse's jumping no end, and took him to competitions too. Later she started riding the owner's youngster for her as well.

My instructor commented when my last share ended that it was a shame because he had come on so much while I was riding him.

I'm not trying to blow my own trumpet at all, but I'm not a numpty and have been a sharer. I know of other similar people who have shared or are currently sharing. Lots of people can't have their own horse despite being capable experienced riders, maybe because of their work or family comitments, often they would love a decent share as it would give them a better experience than a riding school.

The thing is that a more experienced sharer may have higher expectations of the share. They may be less willing to pay and they may not be very flexible on time.

If a rider is good enough to school your horse and improve it they are unlikely to be willing to pay to do so! They are also more likely to want to school, jump and compete rather then just bumble round the local bridle paths.

Put the word out that you are looking and ask for recommendations from trusted people, you might just drop lucky!
 
sprytzer said:
I cannot give her the boot until I find another sharer as I will not have my pony standing in all day on the days I work late!

The way i read this bit is that you are ''using'' your sharer!!
Damned sure if i found out i was being ''used'' i would not be amused.
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That's a little OTT. Most people have sharers because they don't have the time avaliable, or sometimes even the funds and need help. So yes, they use a sharer in that respect. It is not a negative thing that she has taken on a sharer because she does not have the time, esp as she isn't even charging! Although, of course, she absolutely should have vetted the girl properly and has gone entirely the wrong way about all of this.
Lesson learnt? Hopefully.
 
Sorry but I am just ROTFL at this thread! how ridiculous! OP you are as much if not more at fault for this whole situation... poor bl**dy novice sharer!

I for one would rather have my horse stood in / out than have someone incapable of handling it to my liking or as reliable as a chocolate teapot dealing with him in my absence.. not only for my horse's wellbeing but the sharer's too...
 
Pluto can not be turned out as we have no winter turnout, we have no YO as she passed away in the summer and the yard is now run by her daughters, all have full time jobs just like the rest of us, the yard is DIY therefore no livery, novice sharer is perfectly safe and happy to walk and trot safely by herself, the first time I had left her to her own devices is when she attempted to jump!! FYI I have now told her that she is no longer required to share.
 
stargirl88 said:
That's a little OTT. Most people have sharers because they don't have the time avaliable, or sometimes even the funds and need help. So yes, they use a sharer in that respect. It is not a negative thing that she has taken on a sharer because she does not have the time, esp as she isn't even charging! Although, of course, she absolutely should have vetted the girl properly and has gone entirely the wrong way about all of this.
Lesson learnt? Hopefully.
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Many may decide to get a sharer because they lack time/could use osme extra help with costs and that is,ofc perfectly fine.
The OP however,is keeping her sharer on without notice untill her replacement is found,at which point current novice sharer will be dumped.
That is not fair...

To my mind,whatever the resons for an owner wanting to share their horse,once there are sharing it the argrment needs to work for everyone.
Yes,the sharer gets to ride without the commitment of buying but the owner also gets help with their horses care that they would otherwise have to pay for-in essence,a sharer does what a freelance groom/part livery arangement would but pays the horses owner instead of it costing.
Both get something out of the deal and it is good for everyone.
I apriciate that sharers are lucky to be able to share horses,it's a very different experiance to the local RS or begged/borrowed rides here and there,but that does not mean they should be treated like something that belongs on the muck heap ;)
 
oh dear... OP its really difficult sharing a horse with someone- believe me i know! its very easy to get annoyed with them and how they do things or indeed how they don't do things... however, i do think that in this instance you are being totally unreasonable- if you think your sharer is that useless then just get rid of her! if you care about your horse half as much as you say you do then how is it doing him a favour to keep her on???
 
I am more of a lurker here, but could'nt help but read this one in depth!! my first thought was that the op was having a laugh:eek: i have 2 horses and have a sharer for one of them, i would'nt cope without her, i try and support everything she wants to do, it works both ways, you op seem to me to be one of those opinionated people that has to have everything their way or no way and i don't even know you, and utterly irresponsible in letting your horses feet get too long that you're worried about it jumping, you should come with a warning to any potential sharers, a forum is not the place, speak to her in person.:mad:
 
Technically you are using her and complaining about her then? Do you just want the benefits of not having to muck out etc and expect the horse to be the same when ridden by two different riding styles? Understandable if she gets it wrong sometimes but maybe a bit of guidance would help in stable management etc. Sharers offer their time and help though, appreciation comes to mind here.

I hope people don't think all owners have this attitude to sharing! I for one may not be asking for financial contributions when I get a sharer but I wouldn't complain if something wasn't done right, I'd show them how I do it and explain politely why I prefer it that way! Horse's aren't machines, sometimes it can take an experience before to cause the horse to do something the next time, maybe it wasn't the sharer's fault?
 
FullThrottle said:
Yes we have a contract drawn up and she knows exactly what she is and isn't allowed to do, and I have said all this to her face as well, she does not contribute financially and is a complete piss taker often not letting me know until late evening that she hasn't bothered to go up and do him, drives me insane,
There is no physical reason he is choosing not to jump, just being a little **** as she has allowed him to get away with it, just as she taught him to knap!
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Get rid of her then!
 
having been a sharer and given lots of consideration to the owner and their horses and been very grateful for the experience it is hard work for the sharer when an owner is experienced with there horses and may take the piss with the sharer if they arnt quite as familar with the horses.

If i was your sharer I would be very hurt by this. It sounds like your attitude wont change with who ever it is. And unless the horse was advertised as a light hack only Id be bloody pissed off if all I was allowed to do was walk and trot.

oh and I think its quite hard to teach a horse to nap. letting the horse get away with napping is different to teaching to nap.
 
Right, so you have a sharer that doesnt pay you, in your words is ruining your horse, has taught it to nap and to refuse to jump, but yet for your convienence you're keeping her til you find someone else??????? Great horse owner right here...
 
I had 3 sharers at various times, two were great, I could not fault them and one of them was a novice, however, one not so (a teenage girl)!

I had expressley requested that she not jump my pony until she had had a jumping lesson from my RI/YO. Yes, you guessed it, she tried to jump him on her own and tore his suspensory ligament! Not happy, six weeks box rest, year off work, large vet bill and no offer to help with funds or care, he never jumped again, end of sharer!

IMO the owner knows the horses capabilities and sharers should listen and act accordingly, as I said my other two sharers were fab so I agree that not all sharers are 'bloody'!
 
Yunalesca said:
TBF QB,the OP does not say anywhere how old sharer is or that she is a prat-the word used is novice.
A novice will make mistakes and do silly things,part of the learning process-once again though,tis up to OP to make sure things are done to her liking.....

FWIW,my first concern would be is the share learning to do things properly with an owner who clearly gives no suppport :o
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TBF yunalesca i don't see where I have mentioned sharers age or called her a 'prat' I have just called it how I see it.

I have no problem with novice sharers no matter what their age, but they should be properly supported by the owner.I do however have problems with whingers (when they take no necesarry and immediate action) and users (op should make other arrangements). If op is happy to let it go on she should not winge about any damage done to her horse

If I have mentioned age and 'prat' please point it out to me and send me the web address of specsavers LOL :D because I can't see that in my posts, but I only scanned them so I may be wrong
 
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