bullys and no it alls... experiences please

hi all,
I did speak to my YO today, there was only me and her down and i happened to be filling my nets at the same time :) she is being great. the way our yard is set out the liveries are all in a big american barn and there's a separate yard near to the house which YO horses and horses for sale are. she has offered to have a move around and make room for mine with hers :) so relieved to say the least. it may not stop them sticking there nose in when Daniel is down to ride but it keeps me away from it all so i can get on with my horses in peace. Probably wont go down too well with the other liveries as they are miles better stables and its much quieter round there but i really don't care. I wouldn't of had to do this if they had all just kept out of my business.
 
What a great YO and what a great relief for you. Who cares what the others think! also wonder if you might be nearish me as there is a new dressage rider set up near us, called Daniel.. not saying anymore in case you were choosing to keep your location private.

And good luck with the baby!
 
I'm male, so can't feel what you do, but...

I'd be saying to them, as a group, that you choose to do what you do with your horses, and your decisions are based on your plans for when you are enjoying your pregnancy and your baby, and regarding the education of your youngster.

It is possible to be assertive without causing offense, but if anyone takes it the wrong way they are only letting themself down.
 
Toby_Zaphod said:
We were at a yard & experienced similar things said that you are getting. This is normally orchestrated by a ring leader, the 'Queen Bee' of the yard. The one that has probably been there the longest, thinks she runs the yard, has a horse but rarely rides it & uses the yard as a 'social club' for drinking coffee & bad mouthing anyone that actually rides, schools or competes their horse. They are invariably female & consider anyone who grooms, rides & spends plenty of time enjoying their horse & stays out of her little gang of coffee drinkers as 'Obsessive'.
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^^^This
 
Your hormones are all over the place when you are pregnant. People at the yard really got to me too when I was expecting, even though there were only a handful of people there was one lady who was always saying nasty things about my horse but was always quick to 'help' (ie, take over) when my loaner was there... She ended up telling me not to come up -between her and my loaner my horse didn't need me, he was fine... til he got laminitis!
Be very careful with yourself, as after the birth of my son I ended up with post-natal depression, and the bitchiness at the yard and my horse's illness were all factors in this. You need to do something about it now before baby is born and you are functioning on 4 hours broken sleep! You will find it very hard to keep your mouth shut and feelings in check. Nobody understood even though this woman was a mother herself! Once baby was born I felt like I was getting tutted at when baby was at the yard, or if he cried, or if I came up later than usual as we'd had a bad night... My horse was on box rest and so needed me every day. Thank goodness my farrier is an absolute superstar and a father of young children, and so he realised how upset I was, he found me a lovely new yard where the people are really nice. Since moving there I have had no problems at all, I had to sacrifice some facilities but it was worth it for the peace of mind.
 
Sounds like you have a fab OH, fab YO, fab horses and fab trainer....plus a lil baby on the way...whats not to be jealous of..?!?! Just ignore them...nice to see you have an understanding YO. Hopefully you can now relax :D Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and new baby :) :) :)
 
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