Queenbee
Well-Known Member
Well hello all,
As most of you will know, Its been a year of extremes for me and ben, the lowest point was the loss of Ebony on June 16th this year. To me, she was my soul mate, my go to whenever I was lost, just one look in her eyes and I found myself again, one cuddle and my troubled mind and heart would once again be peaceful and steady. For ben she was everything and more, I didn't quite realise how much more until the day we said goodbye to her. Imagine knowing only your dam for the first six months of your life, then being ripped away from her and stuck in a barn with 6 other horses for a week. You are then plonked uncerimoniously in a field with another strange horse, far away from home and the people and horses you know and trust. She was his teacher, his defender, his mother and his boss, his constant for a further 2 and a half years.
I believed that when I said goodbye to her I would not be able to bond with him, because, to be blunt, he wasn't her, no other horse could ever mean what she meant to me, I can't put it into words, one look and it really was like she could see into my soul. So how can you replace that feeling? Well, the answer is you can't and you don't. What you do is develop something different but equally compelling with your new horse, which is exactly what has happened. No one, could have watched ben come out of the stable the day I had ebony put down and not broken their heart on his behalf, a strapping big bolshy horse, looking smaller than a mouse, more frightened than a deer being hunted, and more fragile than... well, anything I have ever seen. Resent or reject him? Not a chance, my only feeling was of overwhelming love and fierce protection for this little man who had also lost the most precious of friends, In that instant my only focus became his wellbeing, that was her final legacy to us both... in that instant our bond was created.
Many of you on here have already followed bens progress since then, but I have been lax in my updates, I suppose that I wanted to have a bit more to write home about. He stayed with me for 3 weeks after ebony was put to sleep, during which time he mourned her, he despised going out to the field to be all alone even though he could see other horse over the hedge, he far prefered the security of his stable. I had his wolf teeth taken out and then after some lay off time whilst they healed, he went to a trainer for 3 weeks, returning to me freshly backed and having been ridden on for 10 days. He had walked out on his own, done a bit of trot, and one canter, all his work had been done from day one on his own, he only had one ride in company during the time he was there... the day that I went to ride him before I bought him home.
Due to a couple of issues, we had a change of yard. I really didn't want him to go back to the yard he was at, only two other horses, no sandschool (only a schooling paddock), all the memories, his pining for her, and also that the YO wanted to cut back on 'work' and didn't want youngsters at his yard any more. Anyway the yard we went to was ace, xc, floodlit sandschool, lots of other youngsters, knowledgable really nice people and a fantastic YO, moving has been the absolute best for us both and ben settled right in basking in the multitudes of praise for 'such a well behaved horse for a 3yr old, and ooh look he even ties up!' I am so very proud!
So, it has officially been a month now since ben came home from his trainers and moved to aunty G's yard, and what a fantastic month it has been... the only lows have been, a few tears at night missing my old girl, but Ben has been fantastic tonic, consistantly throwing highs my way! His first day was obviously a day off... travelling is a fairly new concept to him so this was more than enough for one day, obviously its always horse dependent but I tend not to hold with the 'give them a week to settle in', he's not going to have that luxury when competing and showing, so day 2 was a 20 min hack during which we encountered cars, cars and trailers, bycicles, road signs and white lines, vans, parasols
and (my personal favourite) wheelie bins
he was a bit spooky at these but nothing to write home about. Incidently this was his first ride out on the road. By day three, everything on this ride was a total non-event, no looking, no jumping the lines and total chillaxed monster. He had a week off at one point due to my laziness, and was fine to ride out... slightly joggy to begin with but fine.
We have done lots of hacking, adding new routes and working on our schooling whilst out and about. We mainly hack alone but I do go out in company too. I think our longest ride is about 40 mins, but he loves it, and we always keep it low key and not to mentally taxing. If we don't go out he positively strops. YO loves him, she often brings him in in the morning with only a rope around his neck Hes had some lovely baths, made new friends, and everyone comments on what a good boy he is. They keep saying what a credit he is to me, but its all down to him, how can I take credit for a horse that doesn't put a foot wrong? We had one or two issues at the mounting block, but we sorted those out, he was just bursting with enthusiasm to see what new places he was about to explore. We also had a photo shoot with twizzle, some fantastic photos as ever and there will be more to come in the future.
To date he has been in the school (ridden) three times, the first time he was tense, but listening (or trying so hard to listen
) He put in a wee buck, and bolted (again, pitiful) away from the hedge when someone on the other side of it slammed a car door
. Ride 2, he was great, totally relaxed and ignored all goings on around him. Ride 3 was yesterday.... we had our first lesson, and I love the YO/Instructor... she is just so down to earth with horses and really knows her youngsters, we kept it very basic, 20meter circles, repetition is the key, repeat until he does it right 2 or 3 times then move on, aim for perfection right from the start and do not reprimand. I really like her style. When he tries to go side ways... make him go sideways if he wants! We did a few halts, changes of rein and transitions up and down to trot... he was a bit resistant and put in a few pitiful bucks into trot so we just continued until he transitioned well and with impulsion. Lastly we stumbled over 3 coloured poles... and repeated until we didn't stumble in walk and then trot She also has me halt at totally random times, just to keep him listening. He was really really good, no, he was great!
After the lesson we decided he has slimlined a bit and after the lesson I dropped a gullet size. We had a lovely 40 min hack today and I am so proud, we met our first tractors out today (alone) Again saint ben sauntered past tractors and trailers like a total pro, and we had someone slow down to comment how lovely he was I did a lot of trot to walk transitions and a bit of lateral work, pushing him into the hedge then back into the middle of the lane, the gullet change has just lifted the saddle a bit, and he is much less resistant and more rounded in trot, improving his head carriage dramatically. Now for the cherry on top of the icing onto of the cake... during our transitions on the way home, I asked for trot (which I got for 2 strides) we then broke into a lovely steady canter (Imagine a jumping for joy smiley here-> ). Of course I pulled him up after a few strides because we were on tarmac but my god I was so full of praise, our very first canter together a month to the day that he came home to me. So tomorrow, we are actually going to go for it, I have found the perfect uphill canter path, we are going to have our first PLANNED canter, Im so excited I absolutely cant wait.
I am learning everyday, being at this yard and having the YO who is the GOD of youngsters, is fantastic. Her approaches are brilliant, and yes its obviously great for ben, but I feel like Im really learning lots, its great! She is pushing me to want to achieve, to have ambition for ben and I, we probably wouldnt have really shown that much for a couple of years but already we are aiming for winter dressage and a few small jumping rounds towards the end of the indoor season. She also pulls a mean tail and I can pay her to do it for me *whispers* I haven't pulled a tail in 11 yrs and i think if she saw me with clippers or a rake near a tail she'd flatten me . I have however pulled a mane, although I last used a thinning comb... which she spotted So now its longer, she keeps saying 'that horse needs its mane pulled... this is on my to do list... along with buying a box of plasters for my fingers
Anyway... some of you probably won't have read this far in my post, but for those of you who have, thank you, I am sitting here looking at my last photo of ebs and myself. I thank her, without her loss, I wouldn't have this bond with ben, he can't see into my soul like she could, but I saw into his... I saw his grief and pain and loss, and I knew exactly how he felt, and just like I knew it was time to let her go, I knew I loved him and would do anything to make his world right again... and it is so right, he is happy and I feel alive and proud and brimming with love whenever Im with him. So, thats my update, its been a month, and the monster... well, he doesn't really warrant the name anymore, because he is every kind of perfect. Thank you all for your support with both of my 2 this year, Its meant everything to me.
Emily & Ben
As most of you will know, Its been a year of extremes for me and ben, the lowest point was the loss of Ebony on June 16th this year. To me, she was my soul mate, my go to whenever I was lost, just one look in her eyes and I found myself again, one cuddle and my troubled mind and heart would once again be peaceful and steady. For ben she was everything and more, I didn't quite realise how much more until the day we said goodbye to her. Imagine knowing only your dam for the first six months of your life, then being ripped away from her and stuck in a barn with 6 other horses for a week. You are then plonked uncerimoniously in a field with another strange horse, far away from home and the people and horses you know and trust. She was his teacher, his defender, his mother and his boss, his constant for a further 2 and a half years.
I believed that when I said goodbye to her I would not be able to bond with him, because, to be blunt, he wasn't her, no other horse could ever mean what she meant to me, I can't put it into words, one look and it really was like she could see into my soul. So how can you replace that feeling? Well, the answer is you can't and you don't. What you do is develop something different but equally compelling with your new horse, which is exactly what has happened. No one, could have watched ben come out of the stable the day I had ebony put down and not broken their heart on his behalf, a strapping big bolshy horse, looking smaller than a mouse, more frightened than a deer being hunted, and more fragile than... well, anything I have ever seen. Resent or reject him? Not a chance, my only feeling was of overwhelming love and fierce protection for this little man who had also lost the most precious of friends, In that instant my only focus became his wellbeing, that was her final legacy to us both... in that instant our bond was created.
Many of you on here have already followed bens progress since then, but I have been lax in my updates, I suppose that I wanted to have a bit more to write home about. He stayed with me for 3 weeks after ebony was put to sleep, during which time he mourned her, he despised going out to the field to be all alone even though he could see other horse over the hedge, he far prefered the security of his stable. I had his wolf teeth taken out and then after some lay off time whilst they healed, he went to a trainer for 3 weeks, returning to me freshly backed and having been ridden on for 10 days. He had walked out on his own, done a bit of trot, and one canter, all his work had been done from day one on his own, he only had one ride in company during the time he was there... the day that I went to ride him before I bought him home.
Due to a couple of issues, we had a change of yard. I really didn't want him to go back to the yard he was at, only two other horses, no sandschool (only a schooling paddock), all the memories, his pining for her, and also that the YO wanted to cut back on 'work' and didn't want youngsters at his yard any more. Anyway the yard we went to was ace, xc, floodlit sandschool, lots of other youngsters, knowledgable really nice people and a fantastic YO, moving has been the absolute best for us both and ben settled right in basking in the multitudes of praise for 'such a well behaved horse for a 3yr old, and ooh look he even ties up!' I am so very proud!
So, it has officially been a month now since ben came home from his trainers and moved to aunty G's yard, and what a fantastic month it has been... the only lows have been, a few tears at night missing my old girl, but Ben has been fantastic tonic, consistantly throwing highs my way! His first day was obviously a day off... travelling is a fairly new concept to him so this was more than enough for one day, obviously its always horse dependent but I tend not to hold with the 'give them a week to settle in', he's not going to have that luxury when competing and showing, so day 2 was a 20 min hack during which we encountered cars, cars and trailers, bycicles, road signs and white lines, vans, parasols
and (my personal favourite) wheelie bins he was a bit spooky at these but nothing to write home about. Incidently this was his first ride out on the road. By day three, everything on this ride was a total non-event, no looking, no jumping the lines and total chillaxed monster. He had a week off at one point due to my laziness, and was fine to ride out... slightly joggy to begin with but fine.We have done lots of hacking, adding new routes and working on our schooling whilst out and about. We mainly hack alone but I do go out in company too. I think our longest ride is about 40 mins, but he loves it, and we always keep it low key and not to mentally taxing. If we don't go out he positively strops. YO loves him, she often brings him in in the morning with only a rope around his neck
Hes had some lovely baths, made new friends, and everyone comments on what a good boy he is. They keep saying what a credit he is to me, but its all down to him, how can I take credit for a horse that doesn't put a foot wrong? We had one or two issues at the mounting block, but we sorted those out, he was just bursting with enthusiasm to see what new places he was about to explore. We also had a photo shoot with twizzle, some fantastic photos as ever and there will be more to come in the future.To date he has been in the school (ridden) three times, the first time he was tense, but listening (or trying so hard to listen
) He put in a wee buck, and bolted (again, pitiful) away from the hedge when someone on the other side of it slammed a car door. Ride 2, he was great, totally relaxed and ignored all goings on around him. Ride 3 was yesterday.... we had our first lesson, and I love the YO/Instructor... she is just so down to earth with horses and really knows her youngsters, we kept it very basic, 20meter circles, repetition is the key, repeat until he does it right 2 or 3 times then move on, aim for perfection right from the start and do not reprimand. I really like her style. When he tries to go side ways... make him go sideways if he wants! We did a few halts, changes of rein and transitions up and down to trot... he was a bit resistant and put in a few pitiful bucks into trot so we just continued until he transitioned well and with impulsion. Lastly we stumbled over 3 coloured poles... and repeated until we didn't stumble in walk and then trot She also has me halt at totally random times, just to keep him listening. He was really really good, no, he was great! After the lesson we decided he has slimlined a bit and after the lesson I dropped a gullet size. We had a lovely 40 min hack today and I am so proud, we met our first tractors out today (alone
) Again saint ben sauntered past tractors and trailers like a total pro, and we had someone slow down to comment how lovely he was I did a lot of trot to walk transitions and a bit of lateral work, pushing him into the hedge then back into the middle of the lane, the gullet change has just lifted the saddle a bit, and he is much less resistant and more rounded in trot, improving his head carriage dramatically. Now for the cherry on top of the icing onto of the cake... during our transitions on the way home, I asked for trot (which I got for 2 strides) we then broke into a lovely steady canter (Imagine a jumping for joy smiley here-> ). Of course I pulled him up after a few strides because we were on tarmac but my god I was so full of praise, our very first canter together a month to the day that he came home to me. So tomorrow, we are actually going to go for it, I have found the perfect uphill canter path, we are going to have our first PLANNED canter, Im so excited I absolutely cant wait.I am learning everyday, being at this yard and having the YO who is the GOD of youngsters, is fantastic. Her approaches are brilliant, and yes its obviously great for ben, but I feel like Im really learning lots, its great! She is pushing me to want to achieve, to have ambition for ben and I, we probably wouldnt have really shown that much for a couple of years but already we are aiming for winter dressage and a few small jumping rounds towards the end of the indoor season. She also pulls a mean tail and I can pay her to do it for me
*whispers* I haven't pulled a tail in 11 yrs and i think if she saw me with clippers or a rake near a tail she'd flatten me . I have however pulled a mane, although I last used a thinning comb... which she spotted So now its longer, she keeps saying 'that horse needs its mane pulled... this is on my to do list... along with buying a box of plasters for my fingersAnyway... some of you probably won't have read this far in my post, but for those of you who have, thank you, I am sitting here looking at my last photo of ebs and myself. I thank her, without her loss, I wouldn't have this bond with ben, he can't see into my soul like she could, but I saw into his... I saw his grief and pain and loss, and I knew exactly how he felt, and just like I knew it was time to let her go, I knew I loved him and would do anything to make his world right again... and it is so right, he is happy and I feel alive and proud and brimming with love whenever Im with him. So, thats my update, its been a month, and the monster... well, he doesn't really warrant the name anymore, because he is every kind of perfect. Thank you all for your support with both of my 2 this year, Its meant everything to me.
Emily & Ben
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