Can a horse take an instant dislike to someone?!

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GG80

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Hi Guys, I've recently bought my own horse and things are going really really well, I couldn't have hoped for him to settle any better than he is in the week he has been with me. Good as gold in all respects thus far and has a a temperament to die for, apart from with my husband! He just does not seem to like him, goes to bite him, walks up to him with his ears back and barges him out of the way! Not a gentle, loving nudge, a proper 'get out of my way barge'! can horses take an instant dislike to someone?! He is on his own yard where my in laws live and he is fine and gentle with them and me (I had been to see him a few times before I bought him to make sure we were right for each other, so he knew me already, but he didn't know my in laws). They are all around more than me to be honest as in laws are there all day most days, and my husband works from there all day every day, I am only able to go up there from work of an evening and spend my time with him then, on my own. My husband does nothing to him apart from try to say hello and build a relationship with him as at some point when he is more settled with me, he would like to ride him out to... doesn't seem as though it is going to be possible if he continues being this way towards him. Is there anything we can do to help build some trust with my husband? Primarily it is only really important for me to have the bond with him, but the idea was that we could both ride.. not just me.
Sorry for the long post, but any tips would be great :)
 
Yes I believe they can, for many reasons, including past memories and experience, body language, mood at the time etc. We had one horse on the yard, that use to shake with fear if you went near it even slightly angry at something else going on in your life (abused in previous home), and another that if you tried to demand being boss, it would have you- and it showed up many people who didn't earn its respect! Another horse loves most people, but begrudingly puts up with kids fussing near it- it is written all over its face, no matter who they are and whether they are new or regulars around the yard.

One of two things here IMO (others may have other ideas). Horse has had past bad experiences with men and has taken a defensive survival approach ie 'I am boss and in charge' or 'I will get you before you get me'. Second is (and not saying your OH is/is not experienced), horse knows what boundaries he can push with your OH, and so does. He may also be testing the waters of his new home (he already knows you, so knows rules), and needs a chance to settle. As horse is new, I would be inclined to take a softly approach first, and build on small steps with horse and OH. Ground work is an excellent way of introducing boundaries and building a relationships in both scenarios.

I think it is safe to say too that some of the best relationships are ones where they take time to build- so who knows- their relationship could end up blossoming one day!
 
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Absolutely, it may be that he reminds your horse of someone unpleasant in his past. Take things slowly and I am sure he will come round in time once he realises your husband isn't bad. You don't say whether your hubby is horsey, if not, the horse may be picking up on nerves or uncertainty.
 
My mare didn't like men. When I bought her aged 6 she was good as gold to handle and whilst not a straightforward ride, looked after me (and I was a novice). She really never got on with my OH to handle or ride and would push all his buttons. The difference in her was quite marked. She wasn't a one person horse either as would be good for friends to ride. I think it was the fact that all the vets, farriers and dentists she'd had (and she was terrible with the farrier) were men and something had happened before I bought her. She got better over time but eventually I agreed with her re the OH and got rid!
 
Yes in my experience they can. I had had my gelding for a few months. He was 3 and was very gentle with people. One day a livery walked into his stable and he flew at her. ears flat back and teeth bared and he grabbed her coat. I couldn't believe it . She was not hurt but a bit shocked. The only contributory factor I can think of was that the lady was wearing very strong perfume. Maybe the smell reminded him of someone or maybe he really doesn't like that perfume! He is 8 now and has never shown aggression to anyone else.
 
Oh dear! I knew a horse likes this, he didn't like men for some unknown reason. He was a homebred and had been at the same place all his life so the owner knew he hadn't had a bad experience. He was sweet and gentle with women or even male OAP's but with a middle aged man or younger he was terrible and if a guy tried to catch him in the stable he would pin his ears and swing his bum. And if a man tried to ride he certainly wouldn't go nicely at all and would have a few tantrums. When said owner got a boyfriend who was interested in horses and happy to come and help muck out she got him to feed the horse every evening, she would get him out of the field/stable tie him up on the yard and boyfriend would give the horse his bucket. At first the horse would pin his ears at the sight of him, try biting, pawing and generally seem pretty peeved. Boyfriend wouldn't give the horse his dinner though until he'd calmed down and was standing nicely. Over time the horse grew to tolerate him and I think said boyfriend now hacks him out from time to time with my friend riding her second horse.

Try and get your horse to associate your husband with something he likes although steer clear from giving him treats as he could just get worse and try to nip him/invade husbands space. Otherwise I haven't got any other advice, sorry! I hope it goes well!
 
I had a horse who had been in a riding school environment on a working livery type agreement so was very used to people around and although wasn't the sweetest tempered horse all he'd do was pull a face whilst being groomed or whatever. Until a friend came to take me up on my offer of a hack on my new super quiet horse- as she entered his stable he started rearing and striking out at her. It was really weird and he was really upset. Needless to say I didn't let her get on him, not that she even wanted to by then!
 
OP, how do other animals react to your husband? Is this horse the only one to have taken issue with him?

Maybe a bit of tangent, but an old friend of mine was absolutely loathed by almost all animals, of any species. She's a lovely person and great with kids -she's now a primary school teacher, and doing brilliantly at it in a challenging school - but animals would run a mile. She did like animals, though not an 'animal person' if you know what I mean. When we were about 12, she was bitten by my grandmother's dog, the most docile creature imaginable who loved any kind of attention and was extremely unbothered about people in his personal space. We don't know what exactly happened as nobody witnessed it (she and the dog were just outside the door, everybody else in the kitchen). I always took careful note of how she was around animals after that, and I must say, there was definitley something in her approach - I wouldn't even say body language, more subtle than that - that I could see made animals bothered. She wasn't shouty or anything, it was something else.

Hope you can get it sorted OP!
 
I definitely believe so!
My horse is usually very calm and loving. I advertised for a sharer once and this woman came to try her out. My horse has never ever been like that before or since. My horse literally hated this woman. Whilst in the stable she wouldn't let me tack her up and she kept on pacing. She then wouldn't let this woman get on and then when we managed to help her mount, my mare was constantly bucking, trying to bomb off, shaking her head about and doing everything she could to tell this woman she didn't like her! As soon as this woman left, she was fine. It was so unbelievably strange.
 
I've got an old retired horse who is a complete character and definitely either likes you or doesn't - it doesn't seem to matter male/female/novice/experienced either.

He isn't nasty with people he doesn't like, but is a complete brat and acts as if he has never been taught any manners.
 
Mines a complete sweetheart with everyone - except my friend. Doesn't do anything bad just makes a point that she does NOT like her which is odd as friend has been nothing but nice to her, most recent being said friend went to give her a polo and she knocked it out of her hand. I thought 'thats a bit odd', she tried again and the same thing happened so I tried and she gobbled it right up.
 
Regarding smell, which can be very powerful as another poster stated. Try having him use your soaps, wear your deoderant and perfume (if you wear one) one day. See if it makes any difference. I always rub my hands over another persons before introducing them to my companion type animals (dogs, horses).
 
Absolutely! Z's sister's retired horse (a lovely connie cross) HATES Z - always has, always will . . . flattens his ears at her, tries to bite her (and succeeds at times), but is lovely with her sister and in all the time I handled him, I never had a problem with him. Oh, and Z used to ride him too . . . Z's lovely, so it's not that she has ever been mean or unkind to him . . . he just hates her.

P
 
I second the comments about smell - it may be that your husband somehow smells like someone your horse knew before who wasn't nice to him, or could just be some male product that upsets the horse. Could hubby wear your smelliest stable clothes to see if this makes any difference? Otherwise the wssociation with nice things sounds a really good idea. Hope you can sort it out!
 
My mare took an instant dislike to a guy at our old yard. No reason, all the other horses loved him but she just instantly made his life difficult :p
 
My old horse had an irrational hatred of my friend. He used to chase her in the field, lunge at her over the stable door etc - he was an absolute doll for everyone else!! And she's lovely too, horses usually respond very well to her. They are strange beasts!!
 
Thank you for all the advice :-) hopefully it is just a case of getting to know each other! He is absolutely fine with my father in law and two male farriers so don't think it's a 'man' issue though it did cross my mind as he has come from a predominately female home, but did have a few men round him. Maybe it's because husband wasn't around much last week when he arrived! I've watched what he does and he is a completely different horse when my husband goes near him, is better towards him when I'm around too though. Husband is horsey, knows what he is doing etc so don't think it is a case of him picking up on nerves etc. I'll get him to do some groundwork with him and as advised get him to associate nice things with him and hopefully that'll cure it in time! :-)
 
happyclappy said:
YES. I recently had an intruder in my field. Turned out she was high on rugs. Every one of my friendly animals, who normally adore people, ran mile.
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High on rugs? Not sure if typo or refers to that common affliction of Rug Addiction....hmmm...



My old horse disliked on sight every boyfriend I introduced to him, right up until the current OH, who I kept. Horse hadn't had any bad experiences with men, I knew his entire life story as I'd had him for all of it. He was just picky :p He was a good judge though. Good horse that. Mind you I've got one now who thinks my OH is a moron, but I take no notice as that's her default position on most people.
 
What an interesting thread. Can't say I've seen horses do this myself, but my guess is OH reminds him of something bad, but hope OH doesn't take it personally.

When I go to tack up a horse I've not met before, I never assume I'll be to their liking although so far we've all got on well!

Slight tangent but I love how sensitive they are: I used to ride a grumpy, opinionated chap (lovely in his way!) who wasn't cuddly at all. The day we had to sell my beloved Connemara I was in pieces. The old boy came up to me and just stood with his head on my shoulder as I wept.
 
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I had a 13hh cobby type gelding , I bought him from bad situation and my OH and I cleaned and nursed him . He hated my OH . If he stood near the fence line he would comeover and teeth bared try and grab him, he had a horse etc but they just never got on . Sadly I lost him but still kept OH (26 years now !!) do still suspect he was a better judge of character than me :)
 
Its not always that they dislike someone. My mare took 4 months to come to the girl who came to ride her she was good to be ridden but I had to catch her and get her ready for the first few days then I had to catch her but the girl could tack her up it took the full 4 months for the girl to be able to catch her now they are the best of friends and adore each other so much so I gave the mare to the girl as they obviously loved each other
 
a horse I had many years ago was wary of men due to past poor experiences. He was fine with some men but not others, I remember once being very embarrassed, he was being shown in a hunter class and wouldn't let the ride judge (a large man with a bowler hat) near him. He did lots of showing and he didn't ever mind any of the other male judges.
 
My gelding doesn't like my OH. He is the most easy going pony for everyone else. Comes to the gate when we get him in and is always gentle and very sweet natured. Will let anyone ride him and loves children. That is until my OH turns up to help. He runs away from him when we go to get him and the other one in. Will not go near and has his ears back. When OH leads him into the stable he turns his back to him and starts to reverse. OH gets out of the way very quickly. The other gelding has no problem with OH at all. The naughty one has done this all time we have had him with my OH and no amount of being nice has caused him to change.
 
happyclappy said:
YES. I recently had an intruder in my field. Turned out she was high on rugs. Every one of my friendly animals, who normally adore people, ran mile.
Click to expand...

High on rugs cracked me up!

As for OP's question, yes I believe it's entirely possible. H is cautious with certain men. He was great with my now ex and the farrier but couldn't stand our old saddler and a couple of my male friends have got short thrift from him when trying to say hi.
 
I believe so! I also have an impression that horses plot things together... but that's a different story lol!

When i first worked/helped at a riding school there was a moody mare that was in a stall. I was told to go and get her for the next ride, off i skipped and came back out with her.
They all looked at me with jaws on the floor... i then found out she was a 'moody mare' and hated people in her stall and would kick, bite ect...
I never had a problem with her. She just liked quiet people i think :) but maybe that was because i skipped in thinking nothing would happen!

There were a few at the riding school who you could tell didn't like certain people, and who was who's favorite (from the horses view)

H was a big dun (VERY pretty and think 17+hh) with all of us 'kids' that helped out on the yard he was a saint. A new girl turned up to help and she got her free ride on him but had never handled him and requested him.
I will never forget it, she was ready at the mounting block and they bought H over she got on, about two mill seconds later he threw himself on the floor! she went flying, and jumped up to try again but he was just not having it and kept throwing himself to the floor. (someone else got on him and he was fine) Was very strange and when she tried to lead him he pulled away from her and walked off to his stable...

But i would agree to making you OH giving horse dinner ect then he will think of him as food man :)
 
They are strange creatures, my OH had an ex racer, I had daily care of all the horses and if this horse could bite me, he would, OH appears and this horse would put his head over my OH's shoulder and nod off, I am calm and quiet around animals and my other horses are fine with me, my first horse however, is jealous of the other horses when I'm around and will chase them off, he is also jealous of my OH, putting his ears flat back and pulls faces when my OH and I hold hands when hacking together, he didn't do it when I repeated the senario with my daughter, I now make a concious effort not to give in to his demands for attention
 
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