Can my kids have a go at driving your boat?

[Patterdale]

Inspired by the car thread.

Hi, I know you vaguely from work/sports/friend of my mum. My kids have always wanted to learn to drive a boat. I noticed that you have a boat and wondered if you could take them out please?
They/we don’t know anything about boats but it looks easy enough. They don’t have any of the specialist boat gear needed so you will need to provide that too please. Also, they/we know absolutely nothing about water safety so you will need to be responsible for that too.
It will take at least half of your day, and you will therefore need to forgo your own boating fun for that day, sorry. Also there’s a good chance that one of the kids (who is highly strung) will suddenly scream and refuse to go on the boat, so patience will be required.
If so, the children are willing to do some basic boat maintenance in return, which should help you out loads and loads.

Rinse and repeat FOREVER

 

[Spotherisk]

Sounds like hell.

I learnt to sail when I was about nine I suppose, small yacht with a tiller. Made it very interesting when I very first steered a car as you push a tiller the opposite way to the way you want to go.

 

[Prancerpoos]

I am assuming this is a thinly veiled reference to getting a free horse ride?

 

[Patterdale]

I am assuming this is a thinly veiled reference to getting a free horse ride?

Yes!

 

[catkin]

A reply could go a bit like this:

Me: "I'm afraid my pony is a one-person pony so it wouldn't be possible for anyone else to ride him, or fair to the pony"

(Potentially them: "...oh but he/she/me is very experienced so we'd be fine..")

Follow up if needed: "As you are experienced you know what a one-person pony is and why you can't ride him"

Doesn't always work but it does enough of the time.........

 

[maya2008]

I’m sorry but my ‘boat’ is not suitable for children and I do not have insurance for anyone else to drive it. I would hate to put your children in danger. Can I suggest a local company that provides this service for a fee?

 

[stangs]

Dear person that's pretty much a stranger,

What a coincidence! I currently have a vacancy for utter novices to drive my boat since the last one was sent to hospital. Something about brain damage after my boat got a little worried about having a screaming child on deck. That's boats for you, ey?

Judging by your message, there's not much brain there to damage so I think you and your children would be the perfect fit.

Let me know what you decide,
stangs

 

[humblepie]

A friend of my partner’s asked if his wife’s grown up daughter could ride my horse whilst she was staying with them. Now my horse is a chilled chap but he is a well schooled ex racehorse very responsive to the aids but back then still capable of a quick spin if not forward. Felt in difficult position about it and stressed that he was like a Ferrari not a Ford. Anyway she ride him, he was a dude and she sent me lovely box of chocolates. Result all round.

 

[Caol Ila]

Haha. My uncle is bringing his two kids (5 and 9) across for our wedding in June and he asked me if his kids could have a ride on my horses. Apparently they have both ridden before….all of once.

I said that one horse is green, the other is nuts, and neither have experience with children. But for £20, my yard will do ‘lead outs’ on bombproof school ponies who are used to kids (basically a staff member leads kid around the gallop track on a pony). If his kids really want to ride when they’re here, that’s a good option.

He emailed back, “Got it.” I think he was angling for the free pony rides.

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

Just tell them it bucks like hell

 

[blitznbobs]

Sorry my boat bites

 

[TinseLeneHorse]

Ok, but the last kid who had a shot of my boat fell overboard when it got a bit choppy and was never seen again

 

[teapot]

I once actually said to a set of parents with kids who sailed, when looking for their first pony, that they were indeed not shopping for a boat, and if they were to find a suitable pony for the kids to share (one could stay on in all three paces, one couldn't), they needed to be aware of the risk of both kids drowning and the subsequent rust, unless they reduced their expectations of what a first purchase actually looked like.

Not sure they ever forgave me, but however annoying the brats were, neither were drowning on my watch.

 

[sunnyone]

Yes please we can always do with a hand our insurance covers guests on board.
One of us will stand behind them to help them steer, but when not steering they will be expected to: jump ashore to help get the canal locks open, tie off lines, pull them in and tidy them, plus sundry other chores like cleaning fenders.
BUT they will need to wear children's life jackets the whole time they are on board. We don't have these so they will have to be purchased in advance at around £40 a child. If space in your return vehicle is at a premium you could leave the jackets on board for us to use as we see fit.

 

[scruffyponies]

I usually recommend that novice sailors come along as we're casting off. Many won't actually approach the gangplank, and mum needs to see that their child doesn't have quite the same enthusiasm for sailing that they do. They also need to understand that they will have to go get the boat, learn the ropes and fix their own sails.
I am fortunate to have very seaworthy little boats, equipped with their own navigation systems. If no input is received from the new sailor, the boat quietly joins the rest of the flotilla and keep them afloat until they get the hang of it. They weigh anchor immediately if we have a man overboard.

Clever little boats!

 

[Titchy Reindeer]

I once offered to a mother who could no longer afford boating classes for her kid to bring kid along for a bit of maintenance and an accompanied steady sail around the pond in my high powered speedboat. Mum was highly offended, her kid knows how to sail solo and in the sea! I've known the mum a long time, not much point bringing her attention to the difference between a speedboat and a rowing boat!

 

[Nasicus]

I always feel a bit bad for my boats, I've always put people off when they ask for their kids to have a go by telling them that the boats ca be a bit unpredictable and difficult to control, and then point them towards the nearest local boating school.
They're good boats really!

 

[fidleyspromise]

I usually recommend that novice sailors come along as we're casting off. Many won't actually approach the gangplank, and mum needs to see that their child doesn't have quite the same enthusiasm for sailing that they do. They also need to understand that they will have to go get the boat, learn the ropes and fix their own sails.
I am fortunate to have very seaworthy little boats, equipped with their own navigation systems. If no input is received from the new sailor, the boat quietly joins the rest of the flotilla and keep them afloat until they get the hang of it. They weigh anchor immediately if we have a man overboard.

Clever little boats!

I got nearly to the end before realising you were not in fact talking about boats and I was in awe of your technology

I've had so many acquaintances and child hood friends ask for their children to have a shot.
Sorry, but your child would head out to sea never to be seen again.

 

[Supercalifragilistic]

Deliberately missing the point of this thread but many years ago a lady asked my dad if she could borrow his boat (a real boat) and in return would his little girl (me) like a ride on a pony (a real pony!). Turned out she owned a riding school
I suspect it turned out to be the most expensive borrowing of a boat in history, as one (free) ride turned into multiple (no longer free) rides, then own ponies, then horses etc…..

Moral of this story is that even if it’s a real boat, don’t let anyone borrow it, it works out expensive in the long run!!

 

[Annagain]

I didn't mind inviting the odd child to have a sit on Archie because I knew I could trust him but I had to know the child first, to know they would do as they were told and not get scared and scream (and they were small enough for me to lift them on as he was 16.3. My friend's son who would have given Augustus Gloop a run for his money was unfortunately a no). I also had to know the parent well enough to be able to tell them of the risk and know they wouldn't sue if an accident happened. If anyone asked though, the answer was always no.