Can you get a stronger deeper bond with a mare?

MerrySherryRider said:
I find mares fascinating, they gradually let you in if you prove worthy of respect.
Click to expand...

completely agree with this. my gelding just does what i say without asking, except for occasional grumpiness! my mare you have to ask nicely, not tell! also any one can handle my boy, he is perfect, my mare can be quirky. although i think some of this is down to their history, as there is great variation among any horse, but sure sex plays a part. mares are more challenging, as a whole, but more rewarding.
 
Had two mare and two geldings. I work hard at getting a bond with my horses and believe groundwork contributes a lot but my two mares were/ are just part of me. My tB gelding and I understood each other and enjoyed our riding together. My other gelding was just safe. My late mare and namesake wasn't straightforward but had self respect and although challenged me and my sister she gave us 110% back when we asked correctly. My horse, Samba, is just amazing, I can read her like a book, I know what she won't like and I know how to tackle it. She is very expressionate and everyone on the yard says there is no mistaking she is mine.

I also find mares very loyal. Samba and Toffee if ridden by someone else just stand there and won't give them much even when told properly. A friend took samba for a hack while I was on the yard and soon as she left my sight all I could hear was neighing and neighing and neighing. She went for my friend and didn't nap but neighed for the whole hack apparently. She hasn't done that with me for 2 years, when she got back and I went over to her she was whinnying and then pressed her head against me, friend said "guess your just her mum and probably her world".
 
I've never bonded with any mare I have had, the closest I came was with Eowyn even Meggy who I had for a lot longer I just never connected fully with.

Kia my gelding on the other hand is like having a horsey extension of myself, he and I just click and we are both on the same wavelength and he really looks after me as much as I look after him.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
All the mares I have liked to ride have been quite grumpy or quirky, and very few people I know got on with them lol

Always on the whole preferred geldings, and my late gelding was amazing. I now own a mare, but too early to say about the bond.
 
I think mares take time to "crack". Taken Samba three years and Toffee only really became a horse that was never to be parted with after 2 years and my sister riding her.

Friend has a mare I occasionally ride and I don't really enjoy her but for me friend she is amazing but will say the same as me above.
 
I've been riding since I was 7, had my own pony at 13........then onto horses. Have always had "boys", simply because I never knew why, but always found mares would be very "mareish" and/or difficult when I rode them, even though they'd go perfectly OK for other people! I just figured that it had to do with me, my riding, my attitude to mares, and that was it; and that if buying a horse I'd never consider a mare!

Then I unexpectedly had a mare on loan; the first time I rode her solo it was blowing a hooley and she was well on her toes. The second time I rode her she was so mega spooky I nearly rang up her owner to come and collect her!!! The third time, she shied so violently that I nearly came off and ended up half way up her neck.

Then I took her out one day and misjudged the time; it was a winter's afternoon and the dusk started to fall. It was just after we'd had a lot of rain, and we came back via a road we've done a lot, down in the valley, and it was like a river!!!! The water came up to nearly over the mare's knees, but, bless her, she just poddled on through it, swoosh, swoosh, and seemed to be picking a path quite carefully, but she was on her way back to base and nothing was stopping her!!!

A few days later I rode that way again. I was horrified: the water-line was clearly visible in the hedge; it was DEEP. And the road.......... just wasn't. The tarmac had all been scuffled up in ridges by the floods - if you imagine the way a ploughed field looks, this "road" was exactly like this, the tarmac was all scuffled up like waves basically. It was totally impassable, even a tractor would have struggled. But my lovely little mare dealt with all that like it was a stroll in the park, and picked her way through it, through water round her knees, bless her little heart, as light as a ballerina.

Yes she can be quirky, and a madam when she feels like it, but I know that she'd look after me to the very best of her ability if push came to shove. For instance, we've just put a youngster out with her and traddie boy, to teach youngster some manners basically (she's the ideal schoolmistress!). Normally she's quite OK if I'm out there faffing around, but just now she's always, without fail, made sure that if I am out there, she'll move herself so that she's between the new herd member and myself. Ditto traddie boy, the great lummox would love to bond with the youngster but no she's having none of that and when they're in the field, she always seems to choreograph herself so that she's between youngster and traddie boy. Wow, that's some intelligence ain't it???? Such a lovely girl.

So whilst it did take us a while to bond initially, I think that we've achieved it now. And its a different sort of "bonding" to the one between me and traddie-boy; his is more of an acquiescence for his own convenience (namely food: first, second & third:)), whereas with her it has more of a "spiritual" dimension, if that makes sense; I get the distinct impression that she regards me as her foal more than anything else - and she's certainly taught me how to ride her (then I hop onto traddie boy and he thinks OMG, she's been riding mare again, oh nooooo :)).
 
Last edited:
I've had 3 gelding, then my mare who I lost back in the summer and now a gelding again. I certainly had a different bond with my mare than I did/do with the geldings.

She was definitely more loyal, there were 'extra' things she would do for me that she wouldn't for other people. If you build a trusting relationship with a mare there's nothing better.
 
I dont think it matters whether its a mare or gelding, it depends on the individual horse.
My old horse was a gelding and I'll never have a bond with another horse llike I did with him. He was my "horse soulmate"
My current boy is a lovely character, very loveable, would be happy to have cuddles all day.
I prefer male dogs as well.
If I was looking for another horse I would look for a gelding, although I have had good relationships with mares in the past.
Basically, I have enough problems with my own hormones, I dont need to put up with moodiness from my animals as well.
Kx
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top