Career Vs Horses - Help please!!

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zoeshiloh

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Ok, sorry but this is probably going to be long!

I had a meeting with my boss last week, and the outcome was very exciting. Basically the company would like me to take on more responsibility, leading to overseas work and more time spent away from home. Having already decided that I would have to concentrate more on work before this meeting, I advertised two of my broodmares for loan. Despite one being a very well decorated county winner, and having a £100 service voucher for this season, I have had no enquiries - perhaps my ad put people off, but I wanted to weed out the timewasters.

Now I really need to make a decisions - do I step it up a gear at work, take on the overseas projects and concentrate on my career for the next few years, or do I decide to keep my horses and continue the way I am at the moment...

Now, throw this into the mix - my OH has a very successful business, and has plans to 'retire' from the front line (ie bring in managers etc) within the next five years. He has said that we will be buying a farm and and moving to Devon within the next five years. Over christmas we looked at some property in Devon, and he now wants to move within 2 years.

Do I throw myself into work for the next couple of years, knowing that soon I will have all the time in the world to 'play' with my horses, or do I continue muddling along as I am, knowing that any effort put into my career wont benefit me in the long run?

Personally I feel like I want to really concentrate on work, scale down the number of horses I have at home (by loaning the broodies out) and lavish what time I do have at the moment on my two lads - I could even put them on full livery if I just had the two to provide for, giving me more time to enjoy them, and less time having to worry about getting in/turning out, getting hold of feed, bedding, farriers etc.

What would other people do in this situation?
 
Career, without a shadow of a doubt for me.

I gave up owning and loaning horses earlier this year and found an easygoing share so I can concentrate on my A levels then go on to uni without horses as such a tiring distraction. I have promised myself a horse but it has to come after a good job and a home.
 
In a condensed answer and if it was me I'd concentrate on the career, you seem to put a lot of store by OH's plans and as we know whats good today may not be tomorrow.

Just MO though, I like to look after myself and anything anyone else brings to the table is a bonus.
 
[ QUOTE ]
you seem to put a lot of store by OH's plans and as we know whats good today may not be tomorrow.

Just MO though, I like to look after myself and anything anyone else brings to the table is a bonus.

[/ QUOTE ]

I completely agree with this. Obviously I don't want to think anything would happen between me and OH, but as you say, you never know. This is one reason I think it is more sensible to concentrate on my career - I have no idea when I would get an opportunity like this again.
 
By the sound of it you've already made the decision, you want to scale down. Presumably it will also give you more time to spend with your other horses so you won't be giving up horses completely.
 
I think it sounds like you would like to focus on your career, as you say, you can always enjoy your horses but just may need a bit of help when you are abroad. You will also have another source of interest as it sounds like you enjoy your job, and hopefully some cash to do more with them. Good luck.
 
Just to add another perspective - I work for a european company, UK based so have to travel a lot. I'm knackered, fed up & longing for time at home with OH & my mare (only have 1 horse so slightly easier than your position)
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Being so career focused for the last 5 years has made me realise it doesn't make me happy or fulfilled (or even that much wealthier than if I'd stayed pottering along in my old job). Feel like I've wasted far too much of my life on the Eurostar.

Obv I'm not saying this'll be the same for you! Just my experience with choosing career over horses / personal life. Good luck with whichever route you choose
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Really you have made up your mind haven't you? Go for your career if thats what you want.Worry about what will happen in a couple of years IN a couple of years, but its your life and you have rights too you know.
 
The only advice i can give you is get the balance right.
I have been guilty of giving everything to work - at the expense of friends, family and OH. I have climbed the career ladder at high speed and get paid v well for it.
BUT at the end of the day you are only an employee to the company. The fact you have given up X, Y and Z will account for nothing in the long run to them.
Money, travel etc is great don't get me wrong but trust me after a while it loses its appeal. As my Dad always says once you go over a certain salary the company has bought the rights to your soul - unfortunately my experience is thats right.
If that works for you then go for it - all i would say is how much money you have, or what your job title is doesn't define who you are so do whats right for you.
 
Me too! I did exactly the same and really did love my job for the first 18 months (I'm an events manager).

Now, overseas travel = knackering, long, dull journeys, on my own, working the whole time. Events = 18-20 hour days, bleeding feet, heavy lifting, whining clients, loads of stress - certainly not glam in any way. More money but no time to enjoy it.

I miss my OH, and my dog, and my friends, and my horse. My job doesn't fulfil me like being placed on my mare does, for example, or walks on the beach with OH (even in winter!)

I'm not being idealistic - no job is perfect, wherever it is. My only advice would be to go into whatever you choose with your eyes fully open, think about the actual realities - and then decide
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I think if you can downscale and juggle the horses you keep along with a great career, then go for it. I am in a similar position but only have one horse and my choice is horse or career as I have no one to help me with my horse long term, if I decide to take on the long hours required for the new job.
A sharer isnt really an option for me.
 
Can't you get a groom? Surely would'nt cost that much more than keeping 2 horses on full livery and with livery you still have to travel to where the horses are, whereas at present it sounds as if you keep them at home.

It also sounds like you would feel very frustrated if you didn't go for your career just now - you sound really motivated about it and it would be a shame to waste all that motivation. After all, you can always review it after a couple of years and see if you still feel the same. But at least you will know you tried it. I always think I don't want to look back when I'm 70 and wish I'd done more with my life.
 
I think given the time frame of moving to Devon, and knowing you will be going back to the horses in a couple of years, I would go for the career. A couple of years will probably be enjoyable (after that you might start to resent it like I did!)
 
I agree, I have a time consuming and well paid job that takes me away from home a lot. Don't get me wrong I love my work but I have to enjoy my work otherwise the time it takes me away from other things wouldn't be worth it.

For me building my career has been worthwhile and I wouldn't change anything but I have had a number of friends drop out as they have not felt the pressure and hours sustainable with family life. By the way I am divorced so you can see the possible consequences but everything I have is paid for by me so it is not all bad and I love being totally independant especially as I had to fight hard for this.

The only other thing I would is that whilst you maybe travelling a lot you will see mainly hotels, airports and offices, very little of the actual country itself unless you plan to stay longer than work requires then you will miss out even more on family.
 
I would loan out the broodies, put the other two on Full Livery and concerntrate on my job!!
I really want a horse now, but have decided I need to sort my job (get a better one!!), pay off debts, so that in a few years time I can afford to have one on Full Livery, therefore spend more time playing and less time working!!
 
I have had the high flying round the world career at the cost of relationship, horse and ultimatley my health. I took voluntary redundancy last year - as i was sick of being out of the country week after week after week - and trust me if you have to travel to places like Turkey and have your time extened indefinatly (i went for 10 days and ended up there for 3 months) having to have body guards to take you out on a weekend and being on a prison camp hotel block with guard dogs patroling the compound you finally decide that enough is enough!

I now have a much lower paid job BUT have huge amounts of time to spend with my horses... yes i miss the money but i do not miss the airports - the fact that you get back into the office after travelling until 10pm at night to be made fun of "about your holiday".

However, i have today been offered a similar position to my previous one and on paper the offer is far too good to turn down BUT i dont know what to do as i love my horses and love being at home to much!
 
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