Checklist for buying a horse

[pennyturner]

Mmmm some of these lists make me laugh - not sure that it's the intention but good luck guys but I'm a similar vein I'd be looking for

6 to 8 year old
Irish or Dutch
A horse who's not hot to handle but jumps a be 100
Dressage to inter 1 with scope
Mare but not mare ish
No vices
No funny habits
Must be 100% in traffic
Never ever spooks
Mucks itself out and does poo picking for fun
Never rolls and keeps itself clean
Plaits itself and enjoys having its mane pulled

I've got a budget of £250

Do you know what, Bitznbobs, somewhere out there is a thoroughly over-horsed well-meaning owner, who has turned this horse into something she daren't go near, and is offering it for sale at near to meat money. Once they work out that you know what you're doing, they'll likely give you the horse for nothing, and you can spend the £250 on a nice new saddle for it once you've trained it not to barge you across the paddock / mug you for the contents of your pocket, or pull away from you in terror ... which IME rarely takes longer than a week.

*perhaps not the self-plaiting and poo picking.