Choose between horse or husband???

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jaynedoc

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A quick question, does anyone else have husband that is less than understanding about our passion with horses. I am looking to buy my own horse in the next few weeks (after my loan horse goes back) with my husbands consent he said that full diy is taking up too much time and I can only have my own horse if I have part livery. So off I trot (no pun intended)to arriange part livery. I have great firends at the yard and one has agreed that I will pay her for full livery 3 days a week. You would be right for thinking that I had filled my part of the deal with hubby!! oh no now he is changing his mind agian and saying that part livery will still take up to much time!! and only full livery will do. And he has thrown in the holiday moan saying what happens when we are away! So does anyone have space for 1 moody husband (gelded)! will box if pushed! great to shoe, not good with traffic if the mare is driving! Will deliver! any home will do!
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Mine is gorgeous, looks fab in jods and does my neddies when I'm at work, not that I like to sing his praises, oh and forgot to mention he fully backed me and helped out with finances to help me achieve my dream of breeding from my beloved mare.
But he does snore like a monster!!!
 
I can send mine over to yours for a good old whining session about females liking stinking expensive horses and they can have a male bitchfest all together
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!

Mine used to whinge and wine all the time - they soon get over it when they realise they can go golfing, running, to the gym etc etc and not have you moaning at them for that
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Mind you, saying that, if my OH insisted I went full livery - I would kiss him (
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) - I think!!?? LOL
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That would be sheer heaven (livery not kissing btw)
 
DONT do it! They joy of having a horse is doing them in the day! It makes your connection so much stronger. As for the holidays reason, you can get horse sitters, friends or in your situation, use your friend with the livery yard just for when you are away. It will be the horse' holiday too.
 
Go part livery and share cost of 'household livery' wiht OH as in someone to do the housework chores, so you keep as much quality time togther,
 
I feel smug - my new OH happily mucked out all 9 of my stables at the weekend without moaning
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He was even getting the idea about useful things like scrubbing out water buckets and clean straw and this was the first time I let him on to my stable yard! He even said that he thinks my horses are beautiful and cant wait to come and support me at some comps
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I might keep this one around for a while
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I'm smug too - my OH is horsey and happily does his share as well as mending the lorry, building mounting blockas, fitting kitchens and bathrooms as well as a full time job
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Only downside is I can't go to saddlers and buy some nice Pikeur jods and say "oh but they were only £20" cos he knows damn well how much everything is
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If he wnted to take up a new hobby would you start telling him when he could do it and how often????? I'd choose the horse!
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My ex used to whinge about the horses all the time....hence he's the EX!!
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Any man that tries to force you into choosing between the horse/hobby you love and him, isn't worth having. I try as much as possible to spend time with my OH whilst working full-time, having two horses on DIY and running a household. Try setting time aside for you and your OH to spend together as a couple.
 
my husband refuses to even acknowledge my horse, let alone take any interest in how he's kept...... don't even think he knows his name !!! Good job I pay no attention to anything his says !!! Should have seen his eyes light up when I got pregnant, they soon dimmed when i refused to sell him and i still have to date 2 years later.....

You will never win with them, its all to do with jealousy, they don't like the fact that theres other love interests in your life...

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Melissa
 
My ex told me I didn't have enough time for him and my horse (no surprise considering I was juggling a university degree, a part time job and two horses on DIY!)... I agreed and dumped him. Got plenty of time for my horse now thanks!
 
My OH used to be rather less than understanding about my passion for horses. When we first met, some 20+ years ago, a horse was 'dangerous at either end, and uncomfortable in the middle'! Coming form a non-rider, I found this difficult to equate with.
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However, I stuck with it
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and now, since we moved overseas some 4 years ago, complete with his dog and my coblet, things have changed somewhat (for the better!!
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). He's been know to offer
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to go to the yard, bring said coblet in from the field, feed and pick feet out,when my work commitments get in the way. He will even help with harnessing, and preparing the vehicle when we go driving
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My, oh my!! How this leopard has changed his spots........... He won't ride, though. He prefers his 120hp motorbike to proper horsepower. On the other hand, I won't get on his bike - far more dangerous than neddy riding.
 
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You will never win with them, its all to do with jealousy, they don't like the fact that theres other love interests in your life...

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Melissa

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Bang on - to quote him " you get all the bloody affection you need from that sodiing horse"
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Green eyed monster
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My ex thought I'd cut down horse time when we got hitched but he didn't intend to stop his hobby of target / clay-pigeon shooting, etc & he also wanted me to sell my dream car I'd skrimped & scraped to buy (I know it would have had to go as expensive to run but I'd had it less than a year & ONLY I WOULD DECIDE WHEN IT WENT !!). That's why he's an EX !!
My idea was if you change me I won't be the person you fell in love with !! haha. Still got the horses though !
 
I get the usual from mine
"Oh you decided to come home then"
"You spend more time with those horses then you do me"
"Oh I do still have a girlfriend then"
"How come you can afford 6 sacks of feed today but can't afford to go out for a chinese?"
"We are supposed to meet my friends at 8pm, it's 7:45pm & you stink, how can grooming a horse make you this late?"

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But when it comes down to it, we have the balance right. He knew my lifestyle from day one. He know's they are my passion & will help me (very badly sometimes) whenever I ask. Even though he is non-horsey he will always help me out in other ways. He spent 2 weeks in a tent with me when my mare was due to foal & will go and collect feed or meet the farrier when i'm working. He will spend all day at a show with me cheering me on even if it bores him to tears, but then I will spend the day watching him catch fish 'yawn'! It's all about compramise. He's knows that if it came down to it, I would sell my car before I sold my horses.
I've got friends who's OH complains but that's only coz they don't have hobbies of their own.
 
can't complain oh voluntarily mucks out whilst I ride even if I tell him not to and have a rest lol does buckets feed whatever he can, carries my tack for me when I've finished (god he sounds like a groom!) gets me hay and straw when I ask for it - anything really. He understands how much the horses mean to me and if it makes me happy, he's happy apparently. Been like it from day one
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That's the problem i have, my hubby dosen't have his own hobbies, other than, whining on to me all the time about how long the horses take to do, how much they cost, they get more attention then him, i could go on!!

He's not really tooooo bad though as i have two children and he always has them twice a day so i can go and do the g's, and as long as i give him about a month's notice! he is ok about me going to shows and longer rides, i just think you need to find the right balance for everything.
 
My horse would win every time!
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My OH really good though help's me when i run out of money and has been and sorted her out when i've been ill.And he's a good camera man!
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My husband isnt horsey, although he will do them if im ill, and i mean really ill! lol. We have a good understanding, i do my horses, he goes to footie or for a pint, and i dont mind, it just adds up more brownie points for my time! My family obviously come first, but i would NEVER sacrifice my hobby for someone, i have been the same from the day i met him, yes it has caused aguments, but after 13years we know each other pretty well.
 
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