Chosen not to have a children?

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Bex7

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Inspired by another post in NL and also my nephews first birthday party I was wondering how many women on here have chosen not to have children and if horses has been a big factor.

I understand this is a very nosey question so if too personal don't answer:p
 
I dont want kids til Im a lot older (Im 22) Yeuch I just cannot stand them, Im not maternal at all although they do look somewhate cutein timberland boots and little jackets!
Nah kids dont do it for me, they are just bloodsuckers!
 
At the moment I really do not want Children!

I love my own life to much!! I want to do well in my job and earn loads of money! not have kids to take it all away from me lol !!

I would rather have Animals than kids!

Who knows though I have been with my bloke for 8 years now, I am 25 and not getting that feeling at the moment!
 
Yuck.
Plus, I dont think I could share my BF either - i want all the attention
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plus I dont *think* I should have kids until Ive had a really good life myself, then I'll be ready to give it all away to them.....shudders...they dont DO anything they cant have a good convo til their like 18! and by that time they HATE you anyway, all they do up to that age is whine and cry and sh*t their pants...
 
I do want kids, but it will probably timed around the horse. I know once Chex retires I'll have the option to get another horse, or think of kids in the future. That'll be some decision! I wouldn't sell a horse just so I could have kids though.
 
I am 30 and just managed this year to earn enough to realise a life long dream of owning a horse after loaning and borrowing for years. I have so many ambitions but would also like children. I don't know if the two go hand in hand, it is quite tricky, but I find my life with horses so fulfilling.
 
I waited 12 adult years to afford my own horse again and I would see children as hampering that enjoyment somewhat. I am also not maternal at all and do not really enjoy being around children tbh. So I know for a fact we won't be having them and I am mature enough now to know my mind. My oh does not want them either so it suits us both...anyway, I find my horse commitment enough thank you!
 
It is very interesting to see all these responses. I am in exactly the same position as Torryvald in that i am 30 (this yr) and have only just got my first horse but find it so fulfilling that I really do not think I want children. I also have quite a stressfull job and although it drives me mad at times I am also quite career minded.

My husband can take or leave kids, with the preference being on leave and I know that he would be a handsoff dad.
The thing is I am one of four girls and my sisters are trying or having babies and at times i feel like the mad cat lady aunt, and people can be so patronising when they hear you do not want children. I get a range of responses such as, you will change your mind when you get older! (excuse me I am an adult!) and also the pitying looks. The one I hate the most is " didn't think you would you are not very maternal" this actually bothers me as I used to work in a childrens nursery as a volunteer, am hands on with my 1 yr old nephew and have always got on well with children or done volunteer work with them!
 
I have friends with children who never get to ride their horse! I have one or two who have very supportive hubbies who look after the kids while they ride in the dark!!! Unfortunately most men dont take on the role. Of course if you are rich enough you can get a nanny!!!! Or you could put the child in a box while you are riding!!!! The Japanese had a harness at one time that you could put the child in and hang him/her on the wall!!!
I have never been maternal and never had kids. Part of me regrets it and I think I might be lonely when I am old but when I see what friends have to put up with I think I made the right decision!!

As for people badgering you about when you are going to have children, the best thing to say is you'd love them but sadly you cant have them. Youve spent loads of money on trying but you just cant. You were turned down by the adoption agency because you were too old/short/tall/fat/thin/blonde/dark - whatever. If you own a dog say that was the reason!! ( Friends of mine were told they had to get rid of their dog and husband had to sell his motorbike in order to adopt!!)Then they go away in embarassment, feeling sorry for you and leave you alone!!!
If you change your mind and have children you can say it was a chance in a million and a miracle and everyone will be really pleased for you!!!!
 
i too used to be in childcare which is the primary reason i don't want them now! lucky that hubby feels the same. i agree with the the response that you can't have children, have used it several times myself with interfering strangers when i don't want a whole big debate! anyone else fed up with being looked at like your made because you don't want to give up a life you've worked hard for?? if someone really wants to have children, that's great for them but i do get fed up being made to feel like a less worthy person because it's not something i chose to do with my life. gosh sorry, rant over!
 
I don't know if I am allowed to post here because I do have a little boy.
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However I didn't have him until I was 32.

I never wanted kids and then when I hit thirty I thought "Hmmm, the choice could be taken away from me in a few years depending on my biological clock". It was at that point I decided I would take the plunge.
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Me and Hubby had had lots of chats about how we would cope. He is a very hands on Dad which allows me to enjoy my horses as much if not more than I used to (I really appreciate my time with them now).
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I always felt having children was the end of life. As so many of my friends made children do that to them as did my own mother.
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However, H has not done that at all. I do as much as I used to and as I said I appreciate "Me" time so much more.

I fully respect someone who chooses not to have children. I think that society is very unfair on women who choose "not" to have babies.
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I have no inclination to have kids, but then again, I AM single... I can't imagine wanting them any time soon either, and the clock is ticking so soon the choice might not even be mine to make. However, if I somehow DID get pregnant
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it wouldn't be the end of the world.
 
We chose not to have kids and have never regretted that decision. In fact I got my horse on loan because her owner was pregnant. Four months after baby was born I bought her
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i'm 27 and have 1. so can't really vote, but i've chosen to finish with 1. tried for over a year to have a 2nd and just didn't happen. now with my daughter going to school full time in september, the world is my oyster so to speak. if i had another baby now it'd be a 6ish year wait again. and i've decided that that's too long. will be nice to have the time to go back to a full time job, or just to enjoy a full day of peace
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No kids, don't want them, don't like them.
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Nowadays the respect aspect is out of the window, i don't want to be party to it.
Anyway my animals come first. Pecking order in our house hold is
Dogs
Horses
Husband, so no room for kids.
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Jo
Edited to say, i wouldn't be able to buy as many rugs!!
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I didn't choose to have children at all. I was only 16 when I had my first (he'll be 19 this year).

Somehow I managed to end up with four though. Is it too late to send them back and claim a refund?
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Married 15 years and neither of us have ever wanted a family.
Quite happy with each other and the horses and of course doing them together.
 
I had my little boy when i was 17,i started working part time when he was a few mths old,i then got a better job and was able to go from loaning a horse to buying one.I now work 30 hrs a wk,I do my horse everyday,compete when i can and join in with my little boys social life and sometimes mine! To be honest i thought it was the end of the world when i found out i was pregnant,i went on to achieve my National Diploma when he was 3mths old and get some BHS stages alongside this,i am surprised how i managed it really but with support from my family i've achieved more than i could of imagined.I've now set up my own dog walking business and am doing a degree in canine physcology and behaviour,i'm hoping to buy horse no.2 soon and i still manage to spend time with my son and do all i can to make sure he has a great life.Hope this inspires some of you to rethink ruling children out as the ups far out weigh the downs.
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