clingy mare,companion advice needed please

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Vicki1986

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i have 2 mares, one 3 and one 18.

The 18 yr old is out most weekends for lesson/comp/hacking etc, the 3 yr old is no problems being left alone - and makes no fuss when we return.

It is time the 3 yr old started going out on little trips, which would mean leaving the 18 yr old home alone.

18yr old calls constantly when i take 3 yr old for inhand walks just for 5 mins. So i think she is going to become distressed if i load 3yr old up and take her out to shows etc.

3yr old will be going away in the summer for breaking, and dont think older pony will cope being alone.

So logically, i was going to get a small companion mare to be the '3rd wheel' so to speak.

However, it has been suggested to me that I get a gelding instead as it may help with the clingyness
confused.gif

I've always been a single sex turnout advocate, my older mare has been turned out with a gedling before that she knows very well and was fine - she is in season every few weeks at the moment and is totally in love with her girlfriend (the 3yr old) (im going to get her scanned / look into having her seasons issues sorted which may help calm her down, but she has always been the same to be honest)

We did have a 3rd mare companion but there was a pecking order drama and they squabbled so badly it did not work out, my 2 now are extremely well settled so im nervous about rocking the boat, but i know my old mare, she wont be alone very well (she scoured constantly at my first yard because she was in the field alone/in an unsteady routine)

Any thoughts on this please?

(sorry thats a bit long but wanted to explain it as much as poss!)
 
We have/had a similar situation to you recently, we have a 15 year old tb, and a 6 year old hunter, until recently they have been on a livery yard turned out with other mares so one was never on their own, we could taken one to compete leaving the other turned out with other mares.

But other liveries left the yard, leaving 3 mares and that mare then left too, in the meantime our tb had been kicked and had to go for surgery for a chipped cannon bone, leaving big hunter by herself. I was scared she wouldnt cope but she was amazing and lived out 24 hrs on her own for 3 months!
Tb wont cope on her own so we havent been able to take big horse away for lessons like I do every week etc as tb runs herself into the ground, shouting and sceaming and ends up a sweaty mess etc etc.
So my sister has bought a house with land and the girls have moved there but she has also bought a 1.5yr old ID filly to go with them. We cant leave tb in field alone, but are making sure that we can leave filly by herself and from day 1 have been doing this and she doesnt fuss. Tb now back in work so big horse and tb will ride out of yard together and filly is fine with it, Shouts once and eats grass.

Big horse will be alone from past winter so hopefully we will be able to cary on like that but I agree its so difficult. We would never consider a gelding it always turns our mares into horrors being out with boys. We will still have the issue of leaving tb on her own if we want to take big mare and filly away when she gets older tho but have a few years to practice with tb now.
 
This is such a common problem. If I were you I would get a companion,and by that i mean TRUE companion. Usually consists of tiny thelwell or similar....more interested in eating than companionship! Shetland or similar.....maybe retired etc.

In your circumstance I would get a mare only,do not consider a gelding as could really upset balance.

First port of call would be a local sanctury.....they've always got oldies for rehoming (and you could hand back when no longer needed). Also keep an ear out in local papers etc,but try and avoid the weedy tb,arab,type where owner wants it in at night and basically kept in a padded stable! This is just not practical!

I got a companion 2 yrs ago within 24hrs of asking around. Dear little Delilah is now 28,lives out 24/7 no probs,will happily wait patiently whilst others are out and as an added bonus,I am able to chuck the cub saddle on her and have started sitting my 2 yr old son on her.

Hassle free!! Thats whats you want......a companion,not another horse you need to do lots of work with!
 
Hate to say it but we have a mare like this - couldn't take my gelding up the lane without major issues - to the point of colicking herself on day

She is virtually as bad now we have 2 more, filly foals, if we take them to the field first she stresses in the stable, if we turn biggies out first she stresses and shrieks in teh field till they arrive.

Only have to walk past with a headcollar in hand when they are all stabled to start her off! In our experience it makes not the blindest bit of difference - she is getting slightly better - no colics but still winds up
 
They say three is a crowd, but I think it is the magic number, if you can get another pony, it would be great for her, that way she will never feel lonely, put Yourself in her hooves! LOL
 
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