Daughter losing interest/moaning about cold-am I pushing too hard?

[Goldenstar]

It’s my opinion children should not get ponies until they are weeping and begging for one .
You might just have got one a bit too soon .
I would stop until Easter then start again get her in the pony club if it’s at all possible .
Give it the summer if it’s not working out after that get the pony sold .

 

[honetpot]

I taught both my daughters to ride from about 5, and they did it until they were about 16, when other things took over.
Its supposed to be something that is a pleasure that you do together. I never took them out when it was cold. wet, windy or in the summer to hot. They did not ride from October to the end of March unless it was a nice day at the weekend.
I am I was lucky the pony was at the back of the house, we used to ride to the shops for sweets, or go to the pub for coke and drink, or just ride round the village for half an hour. The temptation is to make everything about doing things properly instead about having fun. If you have a PC that does mini's that another fun thing they can do. They didn't do jobs, but could tack up in a fashion from the age of 6 and did that while I did jobs. It didn't matter if it took them half an hour as long as there was an attempt, I then checked tack.
As they go older they did more, and I have many happy memories of us hacking out in a crocodile, but also there was a lot of squabbling. My youngest daughter fell off at 6&7 and broke her arm twice, which made her a very nervous rider, but she loved her pony and even though I said we would never sell him, she continued to ride and even went hunting as teenager.

 

[AnShanDan]

Also think you should look into nearest pony club branch. We have loads of 4-7 year olds coming to our branch and they LOVE it!! They do ride at night as well (indoors atm) doing rallies and games practices, usually try to get the littlest ones finished for 7.30/8pm so they can get home to bed, but it def. doesn't stop them coming. They get to know each other and they forget about being cold/tired whatever when they are with their friends. I was at a dismounted stable management session last Friday night and there were 2 groups of little kids all running about in a big barn learning about dressage arena markers

 

[pippixox]

MY friend has had her own horse and a pony for her daughters since they were toddlers. But they were often more as a companion and occasionally sat on at the weekend if the girls wanted to.
Her now nearly 9 year old enjoys coming to the farm and has had lessons on and off over the years too. But she never got the ‘bug’ for riding! Her nearly 6 year old is obsessed and always wants to ride the pony. Did lead reign shows last year. But even she doesn’t do after school in the winter.

 

[MissFliss]

Thanks everyone for the advice and reality check. I’ve emailed the local PC this morning so will see what they have to offer and will back off until the weather is less shitty.

 

[Tarragon]

I have three daughters, now aged 16, 18 & 20 and none of them ride despite the fact I own and ride two ponies so already have something suitable :-(
If any of them had wanted to take it up I would have jumped at the chance but they never had that certain something in them!
One of them had riding lessons but very much a fair weather rider and never that serious.
I must admit that to start with I didn't encourage it as it was "my time" if you know what I mean so it might have been different if I had pushed it.
Instead, my older pony has started off the horsey careers of five different local girls over the years who were horsey mad but had non horsey parents, which has been very rewarding!

 

[numptynovice]

One very small tip I got from this forum to help keep them warm - “hot hands” in their boots when it’s really cold. Has kept mine (6 & 8) enjoying their lessons through the winter.

 

[StrawberryCob]

My 8yo seems to get absolutely freezing, have got her some fleece lined chaps, thermal leggings for under jods and thermal gloves and she’s a bit better. It does take the fun out of it a bit when you’re chilly.

 

[MissFliss]

Any recommendations warm gloves for tiny hands would be great. She wears 2 pair currently-a normal woolly and then a pimple palm pair over the top, but doesn’t seem to be warm enough

 

[Fiona]

Any recommendations warm gloves for tiny hands would be great. She wears 2 pair currently-a normal woolly and then a pimple palm pair over the top, but doesn’t seem to be warm enough

Toggi do great small children's gloves, and they do winter fleece lined ones. As do decathlon. Mountain warehouse do small silk glove liners and also ski gloves with leather palms which would probably work for riding..

Does your little girl feel cold as a rule?

Fiona

 

[mums the groom]

I feel for you, bought a pony mad daughter a pony when she was 8 loved it till her 1st fall off on him then has never really rode since she is now 11 and her pony has been hardly worked and has been off work all winter. during that time and various vet bills I haven't pushed her into riding she goes once a month to the riding school for a lesson to keep her hand in but does go down to the yard every night as both our horses on DIY. its hard over the winter with cold days and short daylight hours, only now as the days are getting lighter and her friends are starting to hack out again is she beginning to take an interest (hope we get the all clear from the vet in April). just resign yourself the pony is your pet now or sell it before you get too attached.

 

[KillarneyISH]

My daughter (6yo) has been riding weekly for the past 1.5yrs at a riding school and a few weeks ago took the plunge to buy her a pony. We’ve bought a been there done that FYFR type, but obv still a little bit less steady than the ancient riding school pony she’s been learning on. She was enthusiastic prior to us getting her the pony but since we’ve got her there’s only been a handful of times when I could hand on heart say she’s really enjoyed riding her. The rest of the time shes moaned about being too cold/tired after around 10-15mins, or the pony has jigged a little or looked at a noise. She’s still just about in the lead rein/lunge so still very safe and not doing too much too soon.
It feels like I’m being a pushy mum getting her to ride, but equally she’s only rides at the weekend and once during the week due to my work shifts so not sure I’m asking too much. I don’t know if I should lower my expectations and perhaps drop the ride after school so she’s not as tired or just push through until it gets warmer in spring. I’m gutted as I thought she loved it, I want her to love riding/owning a horse like I do and am just finding the balance hard between not pushing too hard but equall feeling like she needs to realise she has some responsibility now. What do other people with little kids do? Do I have unrealistic expectations?

 

[KillarneyISH]

My daughter bailed out of riding at about that age - I always wanted to be a Pony Club mom and braid manes at 5 am for shows, but it was not meant to be. Riding with friends and doing pony camps in the summer might make it more attractive. Have you thought about letting her off the lunge line, even it it is on a school pony?

 

[huskydamage]

It’s my opinion children should not get ponies until they are weeping and begging for one .
You might just have got one a bit too soon .
I would stop until Easter then start again get her in the pony club if it’s at all possible .
Give it the summer if it’s not working out after that get the pony sold .

This^^ I had riding lessons at age 6 but was not allowed my own until I could look after it myself and prove I was committed to it as my mum didn't want to get stuck doing it. I remember to start with I wasn't that interested, certainly not in helping my mum look after her horse, I would rather stay in and play. At around 10 I got really into it and wanted my own pony but had to beg and show I was serious about it, been obsessed ever since! Got 2 now in my 30s

 

[Northern]

It’s my opinion children should not get ponies until they are weeping and begging for one .
You might just have got one a bit too soon .
I would stop until Easter then start again get her in the pony club if it’s at all possible .
Give it the summer if it’s not working out after that get the pony sold .

Even weeping and begging for one I had to wait until 19 until I could afford to keep and buy my own. I have ridden continuously from the age of 6! In hindsight, I am thankful to my parents for not caving in to me. Looking at the privileged kids these days (who have had a never ending line of ponies bought for them) stay inside on technology and only touch the ponies when they ride them, I feel I can truly appreciate what I have learnt finding my own way in the horse world.

To the OP, if your daughter doesn't change her attitude over summer and the better weather then I am inclined to agree with Goldenstar and recommend selling on. She can always pick up more lessons later if she really wants to get back to riding.

 

[Moscovite]

Definitely pony club, to make friends and make it social. You'll also pick up some ideas of fun things. Private lessons can work with the right instructor - my 3 yo daughter has the occasional 30 minute private lesson. At home if we go in the school it's stuff like Simon says, traffic lights, grandmothers footsteps, round the world ect. We also take her on her pony when we go for walks - especially popular if grandparents or friends are with us. We also will let her ride to places where her imaginary animals are 'shall we go for a ride to the log where your baby woodchicks live, you can get off and play with them, then ride back home.' Having a friend round to ride with her is always popular. With my slightly autistic 9yo son we now just do pony club and hacking and the occasional session in the school when the weather is rubbish or we are short of time, which will still have some games thrown in. He doesn't want to compete, hunt or have pushy private lessons and that is fine cos it's more money and time for me to do those things! I never thought my 13yo was going to be very keen or much of a rider but he has spent the last few seasons hunting every Saturday with my mother who puts no pressure on him and he has turned into a really nice and very competent rider who has finally learned to love cross country but again he doesn't want to compete. It's all about finding a way to do it on their terms. Having said all that if anyone knows a way to get three ponies and three kids ready for pony club without wanting to kill the children, ponies and myself I'd love to hear from them!

 

[Fiona]

Moscovite - I take my hat off to you, getting one ready is bad enough (plus my pony if we are going to a show together)

Getting three would drive me to drink

Fiona

 

[maya2008]

My little ones like hacking but not so much doing anything in the school. My deal is that everyone has to go hacking (to walk dog/ponies) so they can either ride or walk. Aged 3, my daughter sometimes chose to walk, got tired quickly and got back on. Now, they both know which is the easier option!

 

[Honey08]

At that age we used to just do little hacks and mess around. i kept the pony fit by doing ride and lead off my mare and my friend's 11 year old used to ride the pony twice a week.. We did pc in summer.