Depression?(Long-sorry)

PinkFairy

PinkFairy

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Hi all, I'm usually quite chirpy etc its unlike me to be miserable but lately I've found myself feeling really down and unhappy behind closed doors. When I'm with people I cover it up and have a big smile on my face and join in with conversations but deep down i really cannot be bothered. I am fine with studies, but I miss home, I know I'm not homesick as i suffered with that when i first moved to college, but at the minute I'm finding it hard to sleep at night then i literally have to roll out of bed in the morning as i would rather stay isolated in bed all day. I'm just wondering if i am making a big deal out of nothing...but it also feels as though nothing goes right, I can't do anything right or say anything right and everythings my fault or just not good enough. I also sometimes find myself in tears for no good reason, just curling up and having a good cry. I miss the way i used to be, i hate the fact that i know i am just plain miserable all the time now when i never used to be. My last relationship ended after five months (not long i know but it was enough for me to really like the guy) and he was pretty nasty about it, and since then hasn't spoken a word to me (not that i have texted or phoned him) and now everyone i know is gushing about their long term relationships and i'm feeling pretty alone at the moment. I've just turned 17 (please don't say i'm just growing up) I have been to counselling before when I was 9 years old for...lets say, my state of mind and i do suffer re-lapses (ok i sound like a nutter don't i?) but I honestly can't figure out why i'm so miserable and crying and tired all the time. My friends talk to me all the time but i really sometimes feel alone!
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sorry this is so long, have a virtual slab of cake!
 
how long have you been feeling like this ? if its more than 2 weeks consistantly feeling low, tearful, no energy, poor sleep,appetite, loss of interest, irritable etc you may be depressed and should go and see your gp or college counsellor so that you can talk to someone and get the help you need. i work in mental health, try and find someone to confide in either a friend or family dont just struggle on pretending youre ok. take care.
 
Erm for a good two months! I have spoken to a counsellor outside of college but it feels like nobody really wants to sit there and listen to me natter on about problems that are huge to me or feel massive to me, but to them, my problems are so tiny! If that makes sense?
 
Probably worth a trip to the GP - it's what they're there for.

Aside from that, how is your diet? I have certain "trigger" foods that can set me off and i have to avoid like the plague. Lots of fresh fruit (i know it sounds stupid, but trust me), helps to make you feel better (bananas particularly btw).

Exercise is another key element for many people (and me!) I have to exercise... it doesnt matter how much i dont feel like it, Ive got to do it. Missing so much as a day makes my moods change extremely quickly and once im down, dragging myself back up is near impossible.

If you want to talk about it anymore (and i do understand what you're going through), just shoot me a pm. But honestly, go and see your GP. They can help you.
 
I'm sorry that I cant be of any real help and offer words of advice but just to let you know that I'm thinking of you and sending you loads of good vibes.
I think everyone feels down at somtime and they cant put their finger on why or pick one reason or incident that caused it.
Is there anyone in college that you can talk to about how you feel.
It is an old cliche but "a problem shared . . . . ."
Michelle
 
you definatley need to see your gp and may need to try anti depressant medication i would also talk to him/her about alternatives to counselling especially if youve tried that and not helped. cognitive behaviour therapy helps you change the way you think or it may be that if you had problems when you were younger they have not been resolved if you tend to have relapses. have you noticed what sort of things cause these relapses.
 
cor, i'm tearful reading my post! It's not what i eat, i love eating what i like as i dont put on weight and i am actually quite a healthy eater! Excersise also isn't a problem, i walk everywhere, talk a lot, and i am quite fit and healthy. College isn't really a problem, i have noticed that the past month i have changed a lot and my friends have noticed it and told me but i snap at them or get upset and tell them im the same old me but i KNOW i'm not. I just can't help feeling like a worthless sack of poop sometimes! But the thing that bugs me is it's not sometimes now...its all the time! I don't really like to share problems like this with friends or people at college, due to something i shared a while ago being twisted and spread round as a rumour! So now i prefer to talk to the lovlies of HHO! I just feel like I'm on the edge of a breakdown, waiting for one more thing to go wrong and i'll just snap and fall apart! I'm struggling to hold myself together somedays but i feel that nobody wants to know (they usually say its typical teenage part of life!) and that nobody will understand. Like theres no point at all to anything and i just cannot be bothered to move somedays
 
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I ditto michb52.....there is not much I can say to help really but just to let you know that we ARE listening and hope you are feeling better soon


<<<<<hugs>>>>

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thanks
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im sorry i feel like a pest bothering you all with my rubbish
 
It is true that the teenage years are difficult and can bring on a lot of 'strange' thoughts and moods. However I think you sound like you need to go and mention your feelings to your GP. Even if he doesn't feel medication is the route to go I am sure that he will be able to help in some other way. Struggling on by yourself is not the way to go so please make yourself and appointment asap and see what he says.
 
The one thing i am hesitant about is the GP in our local surgery near college..I don't find him helpful at all and i dread seeing him for all the useless help he gives me. I was hoping there could be something else i could try. But whenever i talk to people about my problems i end up in floods of tears before i've even started.
 
I really think that you should go and talk to your GP as they will be able to arrange for you to see someone who can help. Just repeat what you have said on the forum. Its no good people saying you should snap out of it, you cant!

Just as an aside, a very good friend of mine has suffered from depression and she swears by St Johns Wort which is well know as a totally natural herbal remedy for depression. If you dont feel you can seek help (and I really think you should!) then maybe give it a try. (Just try Googling St Johns Wort). Good luck and I'm really thinking of you.
 
I will have a look in the local pharmacy to see what they have to offer. Thank you for all your kind replies, i am sorry if i sound ungrateful i'm really glad to have found a lovely bunch who don't mind listening to me nattering on about the woes of my life but i can only handle so much before i am about to snap.
 
I will do. I am currently having a natter with someone from HHO on MSN which is helping a bit, but i'm worried that i will just slide back downhill. I know what i am capable of, i have done it before (dont worry its not a threat) i am just worried it will happen again which is why i chose to reveal all to you before it does happen as i know i need some help
 
Go to the library & borrow some books on depression. Everyone's different and everyone gets depressed for different reasons, so some of the suggestions in the books will make you think ???? but hopefully a few of them will click.

I had it pretty badly between the ages of 10 and 25 & I really wish I'd researched it a lot sooner.

I will PM you some of the tricks I've learnt to ward it off. For me, the whole thing was like stopping biting my nails - very hard work & an uphill struggle to start with, then after a while it got to be second nature.

Don't give up!!

T x
 
can you go to a different GP? Wouldn't recommend private counsellors for this as they are not medically trained and if you are depressed you need to go to a doctor.

NHS counselling - I have heard - is better than private, but that is a generalisation.

I hope you feel better soon (((((hugs))))) x
 
Firstly hug huges. I know exactly what you are going through as been there myself.

Sorry if I repeat what anyone else has already mentioned but here are a few things that helped me.

Try speaking to your doctor. Mine was never really helpful and I hated going to him. However when I went about feeling depressed, he was very sympathetic. Not saying yours will be, but you never know unless you try. If GP still not helpful, could you ask to see another one?

Does your college have a counceller? They are more likey to have experience of depression etc as quite alot of students feel like that. Again I did not think a counceller would help,but they did and are able to offer tips and advice.

Would a new hobby help? I took up jiujitsu when I went to uni and meeting new people, learning something completly different and was great stress relif!.

Finally, I can recommed the website selfesteem4women.com. They offer lots of advice for depression, self esteem etc.
 
Hi Pinkrider. You sound like you are depressed. I have been feeling exactly as you have described and have been on anti-depressants for the last 4 weeks. I have at least now stopped crying at the drop of a hat! You really need to see a GP and they should also run some blood tests to check everything else is ok. You should not feel ashamed for feeling this way - many people suffer from this illness at some point in their lives. Take care and remember - you are NOT alone.
 
You are not a nutter ok nor going mad!!
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We all go through bad times, really bad times but believe you me you would be well advised to see your GP, even if you took antidepressants for a while and had some more counselling, there are different types of counselling that you can have. It sounds like you need to get some things off your chest to someone who can help. Normallly there are some issues that you do not realise are making your feel down. A good counsellor will put you back, maybe help you with some form of behaviour therapy. Please go and get help. Like the others said ensure your diet is good. Take care of yourself because you have your whole life ahead of you and life can be great fun you know!!!
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So sorry you are feeling so low - but you have been brave enough to talk about your depression here, and found that there are some really supportive and kind people who really, really don't think that you are a pest! I know that when you are feeling very down its difficult to do anything like change GP etc, but it sounds to me as though this is the first step - is there another doctor in the same practice who you could ask to see or would your counsellor be able to recommend a different GP? I think its really important that you find a sympathetic doctor who will spend time listening to you, and will prescribe the right anti-depressants for short-term help. Longer term, I agree that CBT might well be helpful - I have a colleague who is a therapist, and would be able to recommend someone if you want to PM me for a contact name. Also if you are feeling very desperate in the middle of the night, which is often the most grim time, don't forget that you can phone the Samaritans who are always there to talk for as long as you need to.
In the meantime, BIG HUGS, and don't forget that there's lots of people out here for you!
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hiSorry to hear you're feeling so down but it does sound like depression.I've skim read this at speed so don't know if anyone has asked this but are you on the pill at all?
In addition to the issues you've obviously already faced hormonal fluctuations can cause merry havoc with mind and mood.
As everyone has suggested if you could maybe find a new GP perhaps they could run some bloods and / or suggest some alternatives.
You're not alone out there and there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.
Hugs to you.
 
Hi, i'm back, thanks for your advice, i have changed doctors twice and am still not happy with the "help" they give me so i would prefer to see a counsellor at college. I will have a chat with my tutor to see what she recommends though. You're a fabulous forum!! Love to you all xx
 
Ooo, no, sorry but couldn't disagree more! Ex-OH went to a cognitive counsellor (member of the British Psychological Society or whatever it is called, so he knew she was legit) and she was BRILLIANT! Really helped with his PTSD etc.

I tried an NHS counsellor when second marriage broke down, he was awful. Complete waste of time, and NHS would only offer me 6 sessions - you can't achieve much if anything in such a short time!

PinkRider - really hope you feel better soon, have been feeling low myself since marriage break-up last October and it ain't much fun so I know where you are coming from
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Big hugs for you!
 
Well, i think another thing making me anxious is the upcoming BHS stage 1 exam in march! I'm petrified i'll fail obviously as i feel i am a failure anyway so its getting hard! Although have just pushed myself to successfully complete an assignment and have just handed it in
 
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