Dilemma :(

Hi Jess, I take it this is T?
She is a lovely horse and personally, I'd buy her. At 15, its a difficult age to find someone to take her on.
Uni and horses can be done - you could keep other sharer, I just see Kelly when I come home, or alternatively, could you not take her with you?
I think though you need to talk to your mum about uni too though :(
I hope you get it sorted out xx
 
Going back 20 years, I sold my horse to go to uni - I never wanted to go, I went because my mother wanted me to go. I wanted to work with animals and train to be a veterinary nurse, but she insisted that I went - to do bloody music - I didn't want to teach, so I couldn't see the point in it. So I sold my horse, moved to the other end of the country to uni and after about 8 weeks, I left, and returned home. My horse had gone, and the relationship between myself and my mother is still strained to this day. She never makes me feel good enough - my two sisters went to uni - although one of them became a breeding machine, meaning that her university degree has been a complete waste of time and never used. I have a good job - I dont' earn a fortune, but enough to enable me to keep two horses and have an ok lifestyle. Rather than think about the horse, think about where you want your life to go. I've never regretted dropping out of university for one minute. In the four years the course would have taken me, I got a job, had no debt and I have probably got a better job than I would have had, had I done the stupid degree. You need to tackle the issue about why you don't want to go and then deal with the issue. Good luck!
 
Wagtail said:
Yes, definitely buy the horse. She is 15 years old and who knows where she will end up? .
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This wouldn't be a sensible reason to buy I'm affraid, yes its a sad situation, but I take it you are quite young (sorry didn't want to assume) I've been in your situation when I was younger with a few horses, all of which I loved and wanted to buy...luckily I had very grounded parents!! With regards to uni I never went, but always wondered if I missed out, say you didn't go and you bought the horse....would you regret your decision in years to come...have a chat with your parents but personnally 15 is quite old!!! Sorry, good luck in whatever you decide to do though!!
 
Uni with a horse will be hard work. You are going to have to find a compromise between horse/grades/social life, and at least one of those things is going to suffer.

A number of people have talked about having horses thorugh Uni and that it can be done, but I would doubt that for many of them it was their most fulfilling horsey time in their life due to the other pressures.
OTOH, a very good number of people (myself included) would probably count uni as the most fulfilling social time in their life, or the most useful educationally, so I would think really hard before compromising that. Although you are unsure if you want to go, it would be really silly to agree to go without committing properly to getting everything you can out of the experience. Either go and do it "properly", or don't do it at all.

I completely understand why people who already own horses keep them on and take them to uni, or could even see someone who had a horse of a lifetime in your position taking it on now and making the compromise through uni for the benefits afterwards. With the particular horse however, whilst 15 is not written off old, she will be 18 by the time you finish uni, and is likely to be starting to look for a slower lifestyle, rather than an increase in work. Also, the first couple of years of your professional career after uni are likely to be even more challenging with a horse than uni itself. There is a good chance you will have to be willing to relocate to find the right job, and then work stupidly long hours to establish yourself within the company, possibly with further moves at relatively short notice. All that could easily leave you with a 21 year old horse before you really have time to settle down and enjoy it.
Plus, with her being an older girl already, if you decide at any point during uni that you don't have time for her, you are going to find it pretty difficult to sell her on again, particularly if the market doesnt pick up. At that age you also need to start considering that the chances of her continuing a long and healthy life for the foreseeable future are lower than they would otherwise be, and consider whether you would be in a position to pay for any long term vet care/supplements that she may need, and whether emotionally you could cope with the pressure of dealing with emerging problems or making difficult decisions whilst perhaps studying for important exams or working to project deadlines.

I wouldn't say absolutely dont do it if you really think this one is your horse of a lifetime, but it definitely doesnt seem to be an adviseable course of action. I would expect it will take some time for the owner to sell the horse, particularly if she isnt trying til later in the summer, so it might be that you can contiunue to share the horse for your first term anyway, and that might give you better information as to how well you could manage it.
 
you care for this horse, don't give up on things you care about, she suits you and it could be one reason why you don't want to do your degree.

if i was you i would keep my horse, i would also seriously consider how lucky i was to be able to do the degree and take this opportunity while i was so young, it may not come again, and look on it as an experience not to be missed, in that it will enable you to make a better life long term, its only a short period of your life, and i am sure your mom would be pleased to help with the horse.

think in the long term, at the moment you are confused, when you make positive decisions everything will take care of itself, on some level sacrifices have to be made, but if you have help time spent with the horse will refresh you and inspire you to keep going, and think of the sense of achievement.

learn now that a lot of things that are not easy but will help you to grow.
 
I agree with everyone who says you need to address the university issue first.

This may be the biggest decision of your life so far and you need to strip it all down and discover what you really want in your life. What's your dream position in five, ten, fifteen years time? Do you get excited or cringe at the idea of three years immersed in your chosen subject? To get a good portfolio/first/cv you need to love it - if you do you'll shine and if you don't uni won't have greatly helped you.

Then you need to think about whether the sacrifices involved outweigh your love for your share horse.

Good luck!!
 
KellysHeroes said:
Hi Jess, I take it this is T?
She is a lovely horse and personally, I'd buy her. At 15, its a difficult age to find someone to take her on.
Uni and horses can be done - you could keep other sharer, I just see Kelly when I come home, or alternatively, could you not take her with you?
I think though you need to talk to your mum about uni too though :(
I hope you get it sorted out xx
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yes it is tilly! :( i just hate the thought of her being passed around because she's not the easiest horse ever and i know she just would not suit some people at all as she can be such a sod at times!
im staying in manchester for uni and at home so .. arghhh i dont know. the thought of uni is just really making this difficult :( im gonna give it a go and if i dont like it i can quit.

i just dont see the point in me going to uni to do geography cos i dont want to be a teacher and i dont see what other career it could lead me into :confused:

think i will take all your advice and sit down with the mother and discuss it properly :) she doesn't know (yet) that im on the fence about buying her!
 
Several points to consider IMO.
Don't let the fees issue come into the equation - it won't actually make any difference to the amount of money taken out of your salary each month (unless it lowers it compared to the current arrangements).
There are other jobs you can do with a geography degree - you should explore those before making a definite decision. Have you any particular career ambitions? What would you need to do to achieve those?
15 is not old for a horse these days - many are still working into their 30s.
This horse is available now, or in the near future, for a very reasonable price. Would you be able to buy something similar after a Uni course was finished?
Uni will not take up as much time as a full-time job, so if you can't manage the horse at Uni, you won't be able to manage it when you leave.
If the other sharer doesn't want to help to buy the horse, would she be willing to continue to share?
You know and like this horse and have already built up a relationship with her.
(I bet you can tell what I would do!)
 
Don't go to uni if you don't want to to go. What a waste of money!!

Don't buy a horse just because it's cheap. What a waste of money!!

Take a huge deep breath and perhaps a holiday/break from everything. Have a good long think about what you want to do and where you want to go with your life.

It sounds like you really shoudn't go to uni or buy this horse to be honest.

Wake up, smell the coffee and make some decisions.
 
DipseyDeb said:
This wouldn't be a sensible reason to buy I'm affraid, yes its a sad situation, but I take it you are quite young (sorry didn't want to assume) I've been in your situation when I was younger with a few horses, all of which I loved and wanted to buy...luckily I had very grounded parents!! With regards to uni I never went, but always wondered if I missed out, say you didn't go and you bought the horse....would you regret your decision in years to come...have a chat with your parents but personnally 15 is quite old!!! Sorry, good luck in whatever you decide to do though!!
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Welham won the Hickstead Derby at age 21! So 15 is not old at all. And I think the welfare of a horse is a VERY good reason to by it, especially if you love the animal as the OP appears to do. I so wish I had been in the position to buy my childhood favourite horse when I was a teen. Instead, he went off to be shot at age 16 just bcause that was the age when the owner sent all her horses to the hunt regardless of fitness.
 
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