does anyone else own a horse they hate?

rowan666

rowan666

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I love all of my lot of coarse but im finding it increasingly difficult to like the big fella at this moment in time, its a bloody long story with him but to cut it short, hes so completely destructive to himself and everything else around him its unreal to the point that some days I actually think I hate him! Does anyone else ever feel like this or am I just the worlds worst owner?
 
No. They drive me to distraction at times, but I couldn't do it if I didn't love and adore them underneath the minor irritations.
 
Yup! Got one or two that I would quite happily bop on the head with a shovel from time to time! But they are tolerated because they don't actually do me any harm they just annoy me!

There are a couple at work that I would quite happily leave under buses though!
 
I do love him and only want the best for him but he makes it absolutely impossiblemy others are pretty perfect tbf but with him theres one thing after another and its waaay beyond a minor irritation now and all I ever wanted to do was take care of him :( I am a terrible owner I knew it!
 
EKW said:
Yup! Got one or two that I would quite happily bop on the head with a shovel from time to time! But they are tolerated because they don't actually do me any harm they just annoy me!

There are a couple at work that I would quite happily leave under buses though!
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Hahaha thats made me feel better lol
 
Hate is such a powerful and consuming emotion, I am generally far too idle to bother myself with it.

I have only ever hated one horse because he killed one of mine, OK, not hate, I just couldn't stand the sight of him, and even that is illogical because I know that he was only being a horse, he was actually quite sweet, I didn't want to hurt him, I just can't get past what he did, it was probably 10 years ago now, he is still around, and unfortunately I still hear about him on FB.

If I didn't like any of mine I would sell them without a minutes hesitation, and I admit to having done so in the past, hopefully they went to better suited owners.

Liveries on the other hand, I can't sell them :( There are a couple that I absolutely loathe (I avoid handling them more than I have to) again it isn't really their faults, I just hate what they are, they complicate my life and are unpleasant and dangerous to handle. Rude and ignorant, they will quite happily walk through me or jump on top of me. Nuture, not nature though, some silly person in their past has gone

"Ah. They are babies, let them be horses"

"No! Don't!"

What is 10 minutes a day to teach the poor things to walk nicely, stand when told, pick their feet up, don't barge etc when they are babies, not when they weigh over a ton and are 6' tall :/

I would still happily see them go out of the gate and never give them another thought. I would happily kick their past soppy, ineffective handlers up the backside too!
 
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Ive had ones that routinely terrified me for fun and I think its fair to say I didn't like them much. I also know horses that would frustrate me to death if they were mine.
 
Yes sadly I've started to loath my current pony. He's rude, pushy and constantly tries to trample me. Wont load and plays up with the farrier. He's a nightmare to ride unless another horse is with him. The final staw was when he reared and went over with me a few weeks ago. I've decided today he has to go as I'm not enjoying owning him. I just want something safe to be around that doesn't require steel toecaps at all times!
 
Maybe hate is a bit strong haha he isnt saleable nor would I if he was hes just at times so intensely frustrating I feel like pulling my hair out! Hes old and ive tried my damdest to give him a good life after all hes bin through with previous owners but he just makes it bloody impossible! Horses ey who'd have em! Lol
 
I have a homebred who I love dearly, and couldn't imagine selling, but much of the time I don't like him. He's so big, I'm small and I'm below his eye level, so apparently I don't exist.

There's no malice in him, but he can be a thug. My friend says it's because he's 100% gelding and I'm more a mare person.
 
Unless you are a pro, your horses are supposed to be your pleasure. A bit of frustration is one thing, sometimes driving you up the wall is normal, but from what little you say it sounds like this one horse is not only not fun for you to deal with, it is also spoiling your time with your other horses.

I am not even going to ask if he is saleable. If he does not belong in your stable then he does not belong. You do "owe" him something and that (to me at least) is to be honourable. That may be selling, one of mine I sold for £1 to a friend who adores him (they are off to the Festivals I have just heard by email :-) ), or indeed it may mean PTS if he would not have a role in anyone else's life either.

I always do the best I can for my horses, but they have to give something back. Our Charlie horse had all but retired for 5 years, but he still gave us a lot of fun just by being Charlie and having the occasional ride out, or babysitting babies. Charlie did not need to "work" to give something back, he was great to have just to have. Not all horses are like that. The horse I soled for £1 would not have been a pleasure for me to have any more, but gives loads to a new owner.

So, if I were you I would decide if the deal you have currently with this horse is a fair and honourable one, from both sides. It has to be fair and honourable to you as well as to the horse.
 
Red-1 said:
Unless you are a pro, your horses are supposed to be your pleasure. A bit of frustration is one thing, sometimes driving you up the wall is normal, but from what little you say it sounds like this one horse is not only not fun for you to deal with, it is also spoiling your time with your other horses.

I am not even going to ask if he is saleable. If he does not belong in your stable then he does not belong. You do "owe" him something and that (to me at least) is to be honourable. That may be selling, one of mine I sold for £1 to a friend who adores him (they are off to the Festivals I have just heard by email :-) ), or indeed it may mean PTS if he would not have a role in anyone else's life either.

I always do the best I can for my horses, but they have to give something back. Our Charlie horse had all but retired for 5 years, but he still gave us a lot of fun just by being Charlie and having the occasional ride out, or babysitting babies. Charlie did not need to "work" to give something back, he was great to have just to have. Not all horses are like that. The horse I soled for £1 would not have been a pleasure for me to have any more, but gives loads to a new owner.

So, if I were you I would decide if the deal you have currently with this horse is a fair and honourable one, from both sides. It has to be fair and honourable to you as well as to the horse.
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I wouldnt sell him, hes old ex riding school ans has a very crappy exsistance before I took him on, he has a heart of gold truely and I owe it to him and want to give him a happy life but he makes things impossible for himself, he has had his last chance unfortunately PTS is now looking like the only option, ive litterally exausted every avenue with him now, im devastated and feel like ive failed him but in reality I know I couldn't possibly do any more
 
rowan666 said:
I wouldnt sell him, hes old ex riding school ans has a very crappy exsistance before I took him on, he has a heart of gold truely and I owe it to him and want to give him a happy life but he makes things impossible for himself, he has had his last chance unfortunately PTS is now looking like the only option, ive litterally exausted every avenue with him now, im devastated and feel like ive failed him but in reality I know I couldn't possibly do any more
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If you've tried and he's not saleable, just have him put down. It really isn't worth the angst.
 
rowan666 said:
I wouldnt sell him, hes old ex riding school ans has a very crappy exsistance before I took him on, he has a heart of gold truely and I owe it to him and want to give him a happy life but he makes things impossible for himself, he has had his last chance unfortunately PTS is now looking like the only option, ive litterally exausted every avenue with him now, im devastated and feel like ive failed him but in reality I know I couldn't possibly do any more
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If you, the owner who has done so much for him, believe that PTS is the only option then it probably is. You say it yourself, you have exhausted every avenue with him.

I too would feel devastated, the death of a horse is horrible. But, I would not feel like you have failed him. In your own words, you could not possibly have done any more.

Sending famous HHO (((((((HUGS)))))))) and good vibes. X
 
Hate is a strong emotion and proves you have feelings for your horse. Hate is so powerful that you're motivated to try anything you can to improve things. If you're indifferent, like I was for the last months with the mare I had in my teens, you just stop trying and shut down. It benefits nobody. I am still shocked at how little I felt for that mare, no other animal has left me so cold before or since.

Red 1s post was bob on I think. It sounds like you have tried all you can, so the emotions you have felt have not been wasted.
 
Ive had difficult times with my current riding mare and at times ive just not wanted to be near her (which im sure she was able to sense). Initially she was a rat bag when i moved her home from livery, bolshy, rude, generally just horrible and difficult (bit me a couple of times) - caused in part by me being in cast (right leg) and being generally useless around her. We got over that. Then she turned into rodeo horse - long story short - saddle issues which we dealt with and got over that. The most difficult thing recently though was being left to consider whether she was responsible for my older mares broken leg in the field (she was PTS) - i dont know (i wasnt there when it happended) and i appreciate horses play or squabble and its the nature of animals but i found it very hard not to humanise what might have happened. But she has always been a very good riding horse - sensible, calm, never napped or misbehaved (saddle issues apart, which were basically two v big explosions!), not spooky, very self contained (and i love hacking her, she is so easy in that respect) so ive always had that to balance the grump she can be and now she is also mannerly to lead (she can still have the odd moment loose in the field and im careful not to treat her in the field or loose) i really feel like we'll be a solid partnership and that she is basically (now) made for me. I now look forward so much to seeing her face in the morning (grumpy or happy) but its not been a straightforward path to that.

I suppose depsite my doubts i always had something positive too and now the positives are outweighing the negatives by far. If i wasnt at that point now i suspect i would have looked to find someone who could feel that way about her.
 
I have one that, while I don't hate him, in fact I love him dearly frustrates the hell out of me. At the same time I pity him as life in general is so scary for him, if that makes sense?

He's a total over reactor panic merchant. It's not even as if its the same triggers every or even most of the time - whats fine one day can bring on a total meltdown the next and then be fine again the following day. The real problem is that when he goes he is lethal and becomes blind to anything around him. He WILL go through or over anything that is in his way with no thought even for his own safety. If he's put under any pressure under saddle he WILL go up and often over. Like I said - lethal. If he has even a minor 'bad experience' of something ie farrier it will take up to a year for him to calm down with the farrier again. He's had more vet checks, exams and tests that you can throw a stick at - to the extent that a vet offered Ritalin, effectively permanent sedation to see if that would help. My very experienced, no nonsense equine vet still shakes his head at him and says that he's never seen the like. Natural horsemanship people (look, I was desperate :) ) say that they can't help - this was over a year. Same for various other professionals - just when you think that you're getting somewhere, it all goes t*ts up again.

In his defence, when calm he is a sweetheart - loving and affectionate to the very few people he trusts. Rock solid with traffic (that doesn't mean that he won't spook into the path of a truck though if a leaf looks dodgy), dogs and even pigs! After 17 years I know some of his triggers but there are still new ones thrown in, often with little or no warning and a disproportionate reaction to minor things - daffodils one spring brought on near hysterics, the next year they were fine! Some squirrels are horse killers, others in the same tree are cute to his silly little brain. I've owned him since weaning so take full responsibility for his behaviour but in my defence I have owned and handled many horses in my 40 years of riding and never had such a failure...he destroyed my confidence in the saddle over the years. It's not just that he could easily kill me, it's the fear that he will kill or seriously injure somebody else - it's a real possibility because his panic is so extreme at times.

As a result, there are only 2 other people who are allowed touch him. Anyway, nobody else can catch him. At my previous yard I had to put in writing that nobody was allowed to take him out of the field for any reason after some idiot tried to get him in (he had a small cut on his leg, I *think* they were trying to be helpful or maybe trying to prove a point?) but they let him go and couldn't catch so I had to get back from work 2 hours away to get him. He'd been loose on the main road at one point. One of the reasons he's not there any more...


At 18 he's retired now and has been for about 5 years. He seems happy and as chilled as he's ever been being a semi feral horse, living out with minimal handling. I freely accept that I must have been part of his problems but rehoming him was never a real option as despite being shared/loaned with full disclosure of his issues on a couple of occasions he was a nightmare, it never lasted more than a few weeks but took months for him to get over the stress.

I love him but I hate his behaviour and my inability to sort it.
 
I hated my horse with a passion when i first got him. In my case most of his issues came from me...i got him so wrong. Id waited 30 years for a horse and i felt he had ruined my lifelong dream. I gave up riding him ( after four trips to a and e it seemed like the sensible thing to do) ive had him 6 years now and eventually got him going...and now i love him to bits.
 
Love and hate are different sides of the same coin. I like love my horses but sometimes they do something and for a bit I could hate them, it's tied up with the passion for them. Sometimes feel the same way about my partner, it's life.
 
I've never hated a horse.
I have however owned 2 that I didn't particularly like much, both of whom were sold (eventually!)
 
I couldn't hate Kali if I tried . . . I hate some of the things he does (like pacing/freaking out when he's alone), but HIM I love - and always will.

That said, I've met some horses I didn't like very much, mostly because they were very, very rude.

P
 
I have never hated a horse, but I have disliked a couple. The first I was going to send to the sales I was so fed up, but I decided that since I had owned horses for years, why should this one defeat me. In the end this horse taught me an awful lot, and I was a lot more sympathetic to others since, and she set me on a journey I am pleased I went on. The breakthrough was when I was riding her around an indoor school with no bridle and only a rope around her neck and she just obeyed everything.

The second wasn't mine, but the owner couldn't get on with it and neither could I. He was looking for something to frighten all the time and would whip round and run if something did frighten him - not a bolt, he would pull up. He never seemed to learn. He was just as difficult to get into an indoor school at the local competition venue the third time as he had been the first. It was a shame because he was a very nice type of pony and good to handle. After a lot more schooling he eventually went to a good home with other horses to ride out with and has been fine.
 
I don't think I've ever hated a horse.... Especially not mine! I wouldn't own them if I did; my welsh pony can be a massive pain sometimes but I've never hated him or even disliked him, just heaved a weary sigh....
 
Quite frankly I cannot imagine 'hating' any animal, i own dogs that have killed other animals, this has got to be a huge reason to hate them right? I did at the time but dont now. It was an instinct that they carried out.
In my opinion its just ridiculous to hate an animal, and to intensely dislike an animal, i think you have to somewhat expect that you will not be able to train or even tolerate there behaviour, therefore you are probably biased against the horse anyway.
My suggestion, if at all possible, is to really look at this from an unbiased angle and maybe not let the horse in question get to you so much. Maybe take a step back from horses and concentrate on something else. After all if he has to live in a field doing sod all so what, its a horse at the end of the day and they very much have wild instincts still intact even though domesticated and I think a lot of people forget this. Pts of course is a more humane option in such circumstances but I can't help but feel for your horse.
 
rowan666 said:
I wouldnt sell him, hes old ex riding school ans has a very crappy exsistance before I took him on, he has a heart of gold truely and I owe it to him and want to give him a happy life but he makes things impossible for himself, he has had his last chance unfortunately PTS is now looking like the only option, ive litterally exausted every avenue with him now, im devastated and feel like ive failed him but in reality I know I couldn't possibly do any more
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You have not failed him, you have done everything you can to give him better times. Sometimes life is so hard and everything is not enough.

If the answer is pts, then it is an act of love and courage so he does not ever suffer again or fall into the hands of a bad owner.

Sending hugs and vibes to you, hope you can sort things out for not only your sake but the horse as well.
 
rowan666 said:
I wouldnt sell him, hes old ex riding school ans has a very crappy exsistance before I took him on, he has a heart of gold truely and I owe it to him and want to give him a happy life but he makes things impossible for himself, he has had his last chance unfortunately PTS is now looking like the only option, ive litterally exausted every avenue with him now, im devastated and feel like ive failed him but in reality I know I couldn't possibly do any more
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I think its very brave of you to be so honest about your feelings. Many times on here people have said horses are expensive and time consuming and if you are not enjoying a part of it then don't feel guilty change something....perhaps its time your big fella moves on?
 
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