Does everyone have someone like this?

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jodiew

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Right i have been at my current yard for about 3 years, and after my old cob getting a tendon injury three months ago i got a new horse.

Now most people on my yard are very willing to help with any problems, but for the last few weeks there is on girl (who is younger then me) who seems to have serious attitude every time i ask her anything, and it is really doing my head in.

Yes she is a very talented rider and has been riding for many more years then me, but she seems to think that she is the best end of!!!

I think that you shold always respect people who are older then you and try to be pleasant, i have decided that if it happens again this weekend i am going to speak to the yard owner (who is a very good friend of mine) as i pay good money to keep my boy there and dont need this [****] for a younger person who is alos a member of staff!!!


Sorry rant over
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Jodie xx
 
Where I go wrong, and maybe you have too, is I ask peoples opinion but don't necessarily listen to their advice. It can be more of a conversation maker than anything, but they then seem to think that you think they are God! Drives me nuts!!
 
simple, don't ask her opinion on anything, then she has no reason to be funny with you.
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ask YO instead. Just speak to this girl when need be, and the rest of the time ignore her. She'll soon come down to earth with a bump when she realises she isnt the best. Every yard has one...
 
I think every yard who had at least one person who thinks they are wonderful and knows best
A person at the yard where mine are kept who kinda runs the places likes to moan and whinge . over xmas when i was home from uni she would say something negative about my horses every time she spoke to me. i was biting my tongue not to snap back!
 
yeah i dont want to snap back as dont really want to make an atmosphere, just really really pissed me off on Sunday.

Sometimes i think it is becuase i have got my own horse and she loans one from the YO, but the YO has a massive say on what she can and cant do on him.

An i think it annoys me more as she is alot younger then me as a little respect can go along way iin my books
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If most of the other people are willing to help you I wouldn't bother asking this girl. You obviously don't value her opinion much so I would steer clear and ask the people who you get on with.
 
at my yard there isnt really one but i do understand about the hole respect for elders thing tho! the yo daughter is 4 yrs younger than me and is rude so i just walk off lol x
 
Our yard doesn't have anyone like that at all, everyone is really nice and friendly, we all get on well and help each other out.
There's one girl there with 3 horses that's a bit wierd but she's not up there very much, but she keeps herself to herself anyway.

Sam x
 
do you think she has any idea that the way she speaks is causing you offence? Maybe she is a bit off because she is more confident with horses than people, maybe she really does know a lot, but isn't old enough to have learned tact and diplomacy.

Rather than complain to the YO I would tackle her next time she says something negative..along the lines of..you are very critical about X, is there anything about the horse/my riding/state of my stable that you think is good... and give her a chance to redeem herself..if she is still unpleasant then the position is clear.

It doesn't have to be a confrontation, pretty much anything can be softened with a smile
 
I was always brought up & taught that you earn respect. You don't just deserve it because you are older. No this doesn't mean that you can be rude. But it is just one of my gripes that people believe that age (no matter what deserves respect) I have alot of respect for few people that are younger than me.
Sorry abit off what you are going on about but just had to say it!
 
I did have one at my last yard. I left. I had a horse who had had problem after problem. Scoliosis of the spine, ringbone, bone spavin in one hock then went onto the other hock, spent 2 years trying to tackle all the problems, went to hospital, had injections, went to Harptury college for 6 months to have physio, treadmill treatment remedial shoes cost over £160 each time etc etc... eventually vet said enough... his front end was fantastic but rear end no muscle, he was not happy. I had to decide to put him down. One person at the yard called the RSPCA on the morning I had him put down. People can be very cruel. They do not know the whole story but believe they know best... there are many people out there believe me.... a couple of weeks after the event I had the courage to tell her what I thought.. .and the majority of the yard too!!! I left when I got my new horse. Apparently she did soon after because people were sick of her and never stood up to her until I did!
 
OMG, why phone the RSPCA when you are doing the BEST for the horse!! UGH!
There is no one like that at my yard, although I do get bossy and a bit arsy, but only when the place is a tip cos no one can be bothered keeping it clean!!
I do have opinions on things, but thats just what they are! But If I do know someting, and I am asked, I try and get the info across as painlessly as possible, unfortunately not always easy, like when a teenager is determined to GALLOP over slimy grass and u just know ur horse is going to follow theirs (born hunter!) and you are tryiung to explain as fast as possible why its not a good Idea as even in trot he has almost kissed dirt! Apparently I sounded like some babying mummy, but it was that or a broken leg, and they galloped anyway (and yes we survived!) And I did give her a bit of a lecture about it though, but only after I asked if she knew why it was a bad idea to canter on slippy/boggy/stony ground and she replied "no, why?"
 
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but for the last few weeks there is on girl (who is younger then me) who seems to have serious attitude every time i ask her anything

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Just don't ask her anything then - it's quite simple.
 
we used to have a girl like that at our yard.She would offer her advice and experience to all whether asked for or not.We all just smiled sweetly and ignored what she had said.She has now left to go and work for a dressage rider.She regularly phones up and says she has done this and that but noone is sure whether to believe her or not as she is such a know it all but we are glad that she is getting on well in her new job as it means she isn't here to give us advice anymore.
 
It sounds to me that you have a good yard and helpful people. I would bypass this girl and not ask anything of her. She maybe thinks she pays her money, does her own horse and thats that, she may resent being asked for favours.

Some people want to pitch in and others dont, you soon find out if they dont by their actions and comments. I think I would just leave her be and get on with the others. It may cause more trouble by speaking the the yo and getting her back up, which could cause an atmosphere etc.

As for her manner in speaking to you, I would just shrug it off, if she is not offensive and outwardly rude, but just abrupt/bosy etc then thats the way she has choosen and it will only distance her from others.
 
If she is a member of staff, speak to the YO and just say that you think she can come over a bit abrupt or something, then hopefully it won't get blown up into a big deal.

I think most yards have some of this going on. I can get abrupt with some people I think, but only because 1/2 people I know are ALWAYS asking advice (which I don't mind at all, don't get me wrong!), and they don't take it (which also doesn't annoy me particularly, I couldn't really care a less, it's their horse) but what REALLY annoys me is that they are constantly asking the SAME question, like they think if they ask often enough I'll change my mind and say what they want to hear!!! GRRR!!!!! And what makes it worse is that I know they ask other people I know the same questions and get the same answers and do the same to them! It's very annoying! So I probably sound a bit abrupt with them sometimes!! LOL!
 
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