Dressage Stories

[jnb]

In the vein of the Showing Stories:

I took my grey show cob to a local indoor venue - the judges' box was one of those built into the wall jobbies so the judge peered through their little window when you approached and said "Good Morning, xxxxx on xxxx" before starting your lap of the arena.
My cob was one of those horses that walked into a place and everyone looked - he knew exactly when to turn it on! He strutted round the arena, did the test without incident and up the centre line his party piece was to nod his head to he judge just after I saluted! I swear if he could have he'd have winked at them.

We won the class from about 20ish which I was gobsmacked about as plenty WBs and flash dressage types (local affiliated dressae venue but this was unaff)

As I got back on to do my second test, the judges' box door flew open (it was change of judge for the next class), the judge flew out and she raced over to me and started with " I MUST know where you got your beautiful big grey from!.....Oh....." He was 15.1hh.
She then said " I could have sworn he was 17hh" ! Cob had swelled out his chest and strode round she thought he was a HW hunter!

Then (different venue) the test we were smashing when we were dive-bombed by pigeons going up the centre line

Same venue - a CAT wandered across the A to K corner as we cantered a circle at A miaouwing at the top of its voice!

Luckily both times my cob couldn't care less (although we won't mention the time we did an uncalled-for 5m loop as someone had wee'd on the track

 

[Sealine]

Proceed down the centre line in trot and turn left at A jump the 5 bar gate out of the arena.

At this point in our (short lived) dressage career I realised my horse was trying to tell me that dressage was boring and he wanted me to know how good he was at jumping.

I actually blame myself entirely for the mis-communication as I was concentrating so hard on keeping straight and focusing on a point in the distance my horse thought that's where I wanted to go. He was just trying to do the right thing.

 

[eahotson]

 

[SEL]

Well I nearly ran over the judge and her writer. It was too hot for them to be in a car so they'd set up little seats in front of it. Halt at X turned into a head snaking, embarrassing brake failure moment and they both scrambled out the way.

Very nicely told me to carry on and she was sure he would settle. He didn't. We showed our unasked for flying changes, refused to walk and I'm pretty sure they were braced for another rapid exit every time I approached. "Kept smiling" she wrote. I think it was a fixed grimace actually

 

[Maddie Moo]

I did a cracking free canter on a long rein across a diagonal once! That particular horse had a bit of a sense of humour and decided to liven up the prelim test ?

Once at a RS on one of the RS ponies, she refused to go near the judges box. The same one she’d seen every day for the previous 5 years ? She’d even seen it with people in before but she was having none of it. I got a ‘tactfully ridden’ comment as she most of the time cutting the corners near the box or trying to cart me back to the gate. We didn’t even come last ? She was a brilliant pony, I adored riding her.

 

[thefarsideofthefield]

Comments from judges on my test sheets include -
Enthusiastic Fell for her halt/immobility/salute at her first Prelim scored 3 and " Piaffe not required at this level "
Unenthusiastic Highland being an uncooperative sh*t scored 5's for everything except his final halt/immobility/salute for which he got a 9 and the observation " Your pony is very good at standing still " .
Spooky Highland " Your pony would gain more points by remaining inside the arena " .
Competing my Clydesdale in an affiliated Elementary test , which he won , at the bottom of the sheet was written " I gotta get me one of these ! " .
I had taken a couple of my native ponies to a BD competition and was working the Highland in in the indoor warm up arena . A woman came in on a huge horse who took one look at my hairy pony and started snorting and prancing with it's eyes on stalks . Being the nice person that I am I took myself off to one end of the arena to work in whilst the woman on the huge hyper sensitive equine snowflake huffed and puffed and tutted about " Other People " upsetting their ' proper ' dressage horse . And then there I was trotting a circle at one end , she trotting a circle at the other and as we came across the school we suddenly found ourselves trotting towards each other , albeit about 15 meters apart ! Face to face no less ! Oh My God ! Her horse was horrified ! It stopped dead , leapt in the air , did a 180 degree turn and took off in the other direction . She eventually hauled it to a stop , turned to face me with a face like thunder and screamed " It's the f***ing feathers ! " .
I am not often lost for words but just as I was groping around in my brain for a response I heard Mr Farside 's calm and measured tones coming from the dark depths of the viewing gallery .
" If you think that's got f***ing feathers , love , " he said amiably " wait 'til you see the f***ing Fell " .

 

[millikins]

We took our Eriskay to an evening dressage. She'd more or less retired but we thought she'd like a little jolly. She warmed up beautifully, calm and obedient then went in for the test, most of which she proceeded to do sideways, a little unnecessary in a prelim. She also refused point blank to go near one corner and gave the judge's car a very wide berth, but she did the whole test with ears pricked, big black eyes sparkling and was obviously just having the best time. By the end my daughter couldn't stop laughing, nor could the judge and she didn't even come last.

 

[Dave's Mam]

My first ever dressage away from home. It was so scary for Dave. His best mate left him all alone in the warm up where SJ warm up was also taking place. It was awful he said.
Friend came out of indoor & he had to go somewhere he'd never been before.
Spook at A so badly my saddle slipped.
Continue to be a Drama Queen all through Intro C.
I gave up trying to be serious & just laughed as he spooked at the caller, the advertising & only NOT spooking at the judges car.
We stayed together by some miracle with 34% "Lateral steps not required at this level" & a 6th place rosette, as there were only 6 in the class.