Eleven years ago today...

[_MizElz_]

...I lost my beloved boy Mickey. He was truly my best friend, and I loved him like I had never loved any horse before. He'd been badly beaten by his previous owner before being abandoned completely, and when he came to us, it took me many weeks to earn his trust. But as the months went on, he began to realise that not all humans were bad, and that all I wanted was for him to be happy.

The night he died, I felt like my whole world was caving in, but one of the small things that got me though was knowing that he WAS happy, and that his last few months had been the best of his life. A close friend came over that night to check that we were all ok, and brought with her a big bunch of red peonies to lay upon his body; when he was later buried, we placed them on top of his grave. And today, one solitary peony has just opened in our garden.

I always find this day hard every year. I'm twenty three now, and you'd think that the memories would have paled over the years, but instead, I think I become just that little bit more reflective every time the 21st comes around. Mickey changed my life in so many ways, both in life and in death; I have a lot to thank him for. I'm just glad I was able to be with him at the end.

I drag it up every year, but it's the only photo of him that I have:

A big hug to anyone else who is remembering a friend at the moment xx

 

[misst]

(((hugs))) a lovely picture too x

 

[_MizElz_]

(((hugs))) a lovely picture too x

Thank you xx I wish I had more of him. Unfortunately no one had digicams or mobiles back in 1999! I think that's why I've become almost obsessive about taking photos of Ellie now - every day is a memory x

 

[mymare]

A close friend came over that night to check that we were all ok, and brought with her a big bunch of red peonies to lay upon his body; when he was later buried, we placed them on top of his grave. And today, one solitary peony has just opened in our garden.

Hi MisElz,

I'm so sorry about your boy. This is the really crap part about keeping animals. When my mare was pts last year I picked the one Peony that was in our garden and put it on her grave. She was buried with a red rose laid on her neck, and ridiculous as it sounds, her Chaskit rug and her Weatherbeeta completely covering her so she didn't get dirt in her eyes and mouth, or anywhere on her body.

When does it get better? Almost a year later it still hurts like hell. I miss her so so much.

((((hugs)))) xxxxx

 

[_MizElz_]

Hi MisElz,

I'm so sorry about your boy. This is the really crap part about keeping animals. When my mare was pts last year I picked the one Peony that was in our garden and put it on her grave. She was buried with a red rose laid on her neck, and ridiculous as it sounds, her Chaskit rug and her Weatherbeeta completely covering her so she didn't get dirt in her eyes and mouth, or anywhere on her body.

When does it get better? Almost a year later it still hurts like hell. I miss her so so much.

((((hugs)))) xxxxx

mymare,

It gets easier; I'm not sure it ever truly gets better. If I'm honest, I don't think a day goes by without me thinking of him, if even just in the sense of being thankful that I have had so many special years so far with Ellie, for without Mickey, I'd never have found her.

I was the same with Mickey when he was buried - he went wearing his lovely green Jumpers rug, and his headcollar with its little brass nameplate. We also buried him with my watch; I'd been up at the bottom of the Downs there a couple of weeks before with a friend and had lost it; when they dug the hole to bury Mickey, they found my watch right there, so it seemed only right to send it with him.

I found some solace in my writing; I shut myself away for weeks on end and just wrote about him, about my feelings, about anything really. It helped, but what really got me through was finding Ellie, although that wasn't until several months later.

Hugs to you xxx You're so right, it really is the worst thing about owning any animal xxx