embarrassing moments

I managed to fall off before I actually got on the horse. I was standing on the mounting block and put my foot in the stirrup - or so I thought - went to hop on and promptly fell off the mounting block landing between my horse and the block on my knees. Thankfully my horse - who is normally a spooky so and so - just looked at me rather curiously.
 
Oh yes another one, our first sponsored ride, my ID jumps a small jump bi like 3 ft clear, cam through the water river, over a tiny jump to finish in front of people and photographer. Mare leapt over and shot to the right a bit, I though OH OH this is going wrong, landing on my bum still holding onto reins mare runs back pulling be along the grass but still holding reins. Friend thought ooops photographer is taking pictures and she put her horse in front of me. why??? well my jodhpurs were half way down my bum
 
I forgot to take my foot out of the stirrup when dismounting and ended up with a concussion! The horse didn't move a muscle!
I also got on my horse from a gate out on a hack but didn't realise the gate wasn't latched properly. As I sprang up the gate opened and I sailed right over the top of a very bemused Barny and ended up on the floor. Thank goodness for body protectors. My friend nearly fell off her own horse she was laughing so much 😂
 
Slipped off the mounting block and managed to fall under my horse, who was a saint and just looked at me with a wtf expression.
Reminds me of another one (terrible autobiographical memory!). I'd had a few lessons at a classical equitation yard not far from me and was very wowed by all the canter piris and piaffes (proper ones) going on, so was thrilled to be asked if I wanted to get some riding in exchange for help. First time I did this it was a foul winter day and the two pro riders were taking no prisoners in the little school so I just tried to keep out of the way while doing something useful on my horse. I was then asked to swap on to a different horse. Went to swing leg over to dismount. It was a very deep dressage saddle with an insanely high cantle. Got leg stuck. Other leg was out of stirrup and on the way down (never did learn the keeping one foot in the iron as you step over). In front of agog audience of trainer and two perfect 20-something riders I did the splits very ungracefully under the belly of the very patient school horse and just managed to cling on to something long enough to free the errant leg and not end up sitting in soggy sand/rubber. Fiery embarrassment. However I did survive that and spent several years there until I had to stop riding, and learnt so much in the process.
 
Once when I was at the beach with a group of friends and our horses, I asked a man to help me up my 16.3hh, bareback gelding. As he did so, I clocked the poor man in the head with my boot...

Another time I was mounting said gelding, this time saddled, from the rather high mounting block in an indoor arena. For some reason I did it so energetically that I immediately fell off his other side and landed on my bum in the sand...right in front of a very posh and sophisticated fellow livery.
 
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