Equestrian Dating and Friendships

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NicolaJoslin

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Is it just me or does it seem to be impossible to find a partner that is just as horsey mad as yourself...or even friends...
I would love to have someone to share my interests with horses and would enjoy spending every day life with horses ?
I’d love to have all the responsibilities of horses and share that with someone, someone that would also be happy to teach me what I don’t know instead of bragging about being better than me and making me feel belittled!! Do these people even exist, or more so where are the single ones ??
 

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Hmmm. I have a horsey OH (farrier) and being able to chew things over with him and having someone that can step in if I need help is great. I don't think I'd want to be in each others pockets all day every day with it though. He has his hobbies and I have mine, most of the time we do our own things. He doesn't ride any more and prefers to be playing with tractors :p But having someone who understands the huge commitment (time and financial) and is supportive of that is brilliant.
 
Yeah I wouldn’t want someone to be literally joint at the hip with me, I do like my breathing space ? But to have a choice and have someone there to share the same hobbies and interests with would be great ??
 
Be careful what you wish for...............

When my husband and I met he had never ridden a horse. He was a top sportsperson already and added riding to his skill set. He quickly overtook me in skill level.

We competed together pre-children and then post-children he stayed home looking after the twins and our horses. Once the children were at school he reskilled as a coach, then a trainer and worked only school hours only with horses and clients. (And still cooked amazing dinners and did homework every night as well as coaching the kids two football teams).

Its great having someone share my passion but gosh does he spend money on his horses!!!!! The biggest argument we have ever had was over his surprise purchase of a young horse.
 
Bonnie Allie said:
Be careful what you wish for...............

When my husband and I met he had never ridden a horse. He was a top sportsperson already and added riding to his skill set. He quickly overtook me in skill level.

We competed together pre-children and then post-children he stayed home looking after the twins and our horses. Once the children were at school he reskilled as a coach, then a trainer and worked only school hours only with horses and clients. (And still cooked amazing dinners and did homework every night as well as coaching the kids two football teams).

Its great having someone share my passion but gosh does he spend money on his horses!!!!! The biggest argument we have ever had was over his surprise purchase of a young horse.
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wow yeah I see what you mean...? perhaps it’s just a no way either way then. Single it is ??? Just stick to friends...I’m bi so thought might have better luck with women in this field but I don’t think it would make any difference ?
 
My OH isn’t ‘in to’ horses which is fine, we have our own interests and meet in the middle if I need something like my Haybar mounted or a new bridle hook in my locker and he is amazing at giving my trailer a thorough clean in spring. I think he quite likes it when I disappear to the stables on the weekend (because he asks “are you going to the stables” if I haven’t left by my usual time). Saying that though, he will have to step up with trailer loading as my mare won’t load without someone in the trailer and daughter is off to Uni so will need to be ‘replaced’?
 
Bonnie Allie said:
Be careful what you wish for...............

When my husband and I met he had never ridden a horse. He was a top sportsperson already and added riding to his skill set. He quickly overtook me in skill level.

We competed together pre-children and then post-children he stayed home looking after the twins and our horses. Once the children were at school he reskilled as a coach, then a trainer and worked only school hours only with horses and clients. (And still cooked amazing dinners and did homework every night as well as coaching the kids two football teams).

Its great having someone share my passion but gosh does he spend money on his horses!!!!! The biggest argument we have ever had was over his surprise purchase of a young horse.
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I feel like I might be writing this in a couple of years! Husband had never been on a horse, we got a standy for him to learn on and for company for my pony..He has ridden her less than 10 times. Already rising to her (very large) trot and cantering.. and just bought her a (completely unnecessary) $500 bridle.. !
 
My OH agreed to go on a riding trip in the Madrid mountains while we were on holiday. Despite witnessing a huge chestnut spanish mare sock a groom in the chest (he suffered a collapsed lung!), he caught the bug, started riding lessons and last year we bought our own horse. It does bring it's challenges, mainly that we bought a project horse that I could bring on and school until he was ready to ride, but of course he insists on riding her anyway which has caused a bit of tension. And it is hard when both of you want to do a clinic and only one horse!
Pros are he splits costs with me, is very good at lunging and longreining her, is always there to do yard duties if I need a night off and its really nice to celebrate achievements together.
 
I have a horsey best mate, unfortunately not as horse obsessed as me - If I’m not around horses I want to talk about them - where as they want to talk about relationships etc as well which bores me. Hence why I’m happily single and have very few friends!
 
Find yourself a sailor.

Sailing is an expensive hobby, so they don't complain about the money you spend.
Sailing is quite time intensive, so they don't complain about the time you take.

Mine also begrudgingly comes to help and in return I begrudgingly go do some of the regattas with him.
 
FlyingCircus said:
Find yourself a sailor.

Sailing is an expensive hobby, so they don't complain about the money you spend.
Sailing is quite time intensive, so they don't complain about the time you take.

Mine also begrudgingly comes to help and in return I begrudgingly go do some of the regattas with him.
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I've managed to get it very wrong and am both a sailor AND a horsey type. (Thankfully, a tall ship sailor, so it's more a case of taking a month away once a year, rather than an every-weekend deal.)
 
Mr Red knew nothing about horses when we met. he was not keen on horses; he was keen on me.

He started by holding them, then sweeping, then mucking out. Then he liked the idea of driving a big box so he learned to drive a Class 2 LGV. Then, well he became much more useful!

He bought my olde venter off me, did some pleasure rides, some dressage and even a clear round jumping at a show. He hired a XC course with me and did a coupe of logs. Best of all he came to see lessons, he was a good rugby player so a sportsman, and he was a great coach, so when he watched my lessons he got it. He was then my trainer.

Now, he s not bothered about riding, but he can do everything else (except plaiting and studs). He can take the horse by box to the farrier, muck out, turn out, bring in... I can't remember the last time mucked out. he harrows the school, builds post and rail fencing... He was even my 3 day groom when I was eventing.

You don't need to find a ready horseman, you just need the great raw material to help one discover your passion.
 
Like Millie I bagged a farrier!
he also no longer rides,but he can help if daughter and I ever need (rarely).
also, he NEVER moans about the time I spend at the yard or with the horses, as he completely understands.
 
FlyingCircus said:
Find yourself a sailor.

Sailing is an expensive hobby, so they don't complain about the money you spend.
Sailing is quite time intensive, so they don't complain about the time you take.
Click to expand...
Shooting works well too, game especially as that's very expensive and takes all day (tho clays can be quite time consuming too)
 
I'm single and find it easier that way. I can walk to the beat of my own drum and not worry about what anyone else is doing ????
I think a supportive partner is probably great but not one under foot all the bloody time ????
 
Mines a farmer (my family also farm), although he sometimes moans about the time (less so in the summer as long as i bring tractor teas), he is good with them and helps out if i need it. He is capable of doing pretty much all day to day stuff, will quite often feed them if i'm going to the shop on the way home from work. He has also been very handy with fencing etc.

He tried riding once but his balance is awful then thinking he was clever he hopped up bareback on my old pony with just a head collar, his leg slid back and she though go so popped into a canter and a couple of small humps had him on the floor with a bruised bottom, never again.

Don't think i could cope with someone who wanted to be as involved.
 
My husband isn’t horsey but he does all the maintenance around the yard, he will poo pick if I’m late home or tired, he can change rugs etc but he would rather not. He bought me a trailer and tow truck and happily maintains this. If I need something and I haven’t got enough cash, he will help me out. He Never moans about time or money spent on ponies, but equally I never moan about his time and money spent on his interests. I’m happy with this and I wouldn’t like a partner who was really into horses because it’s ‘my thing’!
 
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