Experiences of sharing

Burnttoast

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Hello all :)
I'm writing a short article promoting sharing and would love to hear your experiences, both owners and sharers. In particular, has sharing had a positive impact for you in terms of, eg, support from like-minded people, friendship, benefits for the horses and humans involved and so on? PM me if preferred. Thanks!
Sarah
 

Llee94

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I think it works well if the person you are sharing with pulls their weight. If the right agreement is in place then it is a massive help to both people involved and takes the pressure off the owner trying to do it all themselves. However, if the other person takes advantage of your good will like you so often hear, then it is more hassle than it is worth in my opinion.
 

Cazolime

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Just a warning this will be long!

I started sharing a mare in September 2014 after I put an ad up on the internet, her owner texted with some info and we arranged to meet up so I could ride the horse. Went to the yard on a Monday after work to find owner and partner there will both children, very small yard (only 2 horses), owner had had a C section 2 days beforehand and mare had been out of proper work for about 18 months but for some reason (why??) I hopped on and had a go in the school. Horse was ridden in a market harborough and dutch gag at the time. They wanted £65 a month towards costs but days and chores were up to me, I agreed to go away and think about it and let them know by the end of the week.

Despite being the opposite of what I was looking for (I wanted a big, not grey gelding, got a 14.1 grey mare!) I let them know that I wanted to share by the Wednesday of that week and we agreed to meet the following Monday where I could take her for a short hack, I was working as an apprentice at the time so we negotiated the money down to £50 a month. This time was just the owner at the yard and she described a roughly half an hour circular route and off I went! I'd been told the horse was road safe and happy to go out alone. This was tested when on the way back to the yard when I was being followed by 2 tractors and a combine down a narrow road! Pulled into a gate to let them past, mare got impatient and up she went, so we ended up trotting back to the yard with a tail of 1 tractor and about 20 cars (cue apologetic me!)

We agreed to 3 days a week, just riding and all I would have to do would be turn both horses out and make up a feed for the next morning. I used to text her on a Saturday with my plan for the following week and this ran smoothly for about a month before I got a text to say the other horse was moving off the yard and it was no longer going to be a livery. I suggested another local yard where friends had horses and luckily there was a space, I hacked the mare there as owner still couldn't ride and again the arrangement settled into what it was before. Then over the winter I gradually started offering to do more, if I was there in a morning i'd muck out, I was happy to tack clean etc. Come the summer the mare was moved into the herd and due to yard politics owner came in for quite a bit of stick about poo picking. At this point i'd moved to working part time so I agreed to do our share but asked (rather cheekily) whether my monthly fee could be reduced as I was now doing 6 days a week (we did either the morning or afternoon each) and all the poo picking and it dropped to £35 a month, I was now riding up to 5 days a week, including having lessons.

Earlier this year I was allowed to take the mare on holiday to the beach, we've been out to various clinics and done our first show together. I now only pay for her shoes and trim as she's only shod on the front, I can ride whenever I like, and the owner is happy for me to swap days etc on short notice as she only lives locally, she rides on a Sunday (or Saturday if there's an event I want to go to) and lets me know if she wants to ride during the week. I've looked after her while they've been away and vice versa if I go away her owner picks up the slack.

Mare is no longer ridden in a market harborough and I only use a martingale for fast work, she still has the dutch gag but I either ride on the snaffle ring or with roundings (and we can now safely stop to let traffic past!). Owner even bought a new saddle as her old was rubbing at the back as it wasn't big enough for me.

This has become a match made in heaven, despite only seeing each other a handful of times each year we get on and the horse is the main priority. I know her limitations, as she's nearing 20 she's getting a bit stiff, and i'm happy to chip in and help if owner struggles. At the same time if I only have time to ride and not muck out I know I can drop owner a text to let her know I haven't mucked out and she'll make time to do it when she goes up.

I really have got the best of both worlds and appreciate how lucky I am when I read about some horror stories. Having the chance to ride without depending on an hour a week at a riding school is priceless, my confidence has soared, i've done things I never thought i'd do and met some amazing people. I've ridden others at the yard for people and the experience I'm getting in invaluable.

For those looking for a good sharer, I promise we are out there!

Giant size chocolate cake to anyone who made it to the end!
 

Cazolime

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Won't let me edit on my phone but owner is so good when I was between jobs I gave a month's notice that I possibly couldn't pay anymore but owner said it didn't matter! Thankfully I found work a few weeks after leaving the previous job so it was never a problem.
 

Karran

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Been a sharer since 2012. First two were short term. One a summer while I was unemployed, he was a green 5 yr old NF, with a young novice (not that I'm any better!) owner Green and Green hadn't been going well and cheeky beggar had learnt to nap and pop a little buck.
Worked hard to get him to hack out, canter, leg yield and we did some basic schooling in the field - no school and too far to travel after work.

2nd pony was also green and a bit of a brat. Woman was little odd, would complain that I'd either been too stingy on mucking out, or too generous with bedding. Pony shared saddle with her cob and her other sharer so had to work around that, I didn't drive at time and would walk in winter 30 minutes down dark unlit forest lane. Woman often texted me merrily to tell me she was on same train as me and would see me at the yard and not offer me a lift from her car parked at station. She then decided to move her "its ok though I have another rider coming, she's not ridden for 4 years but I'm sure she won't be as bad."

Now I have V. I am coming up to my 4th winter with her, her owner is now a good friend, she suffers from back/hip problems and struggles to ride or find time to do V. I do my set three days a week, left to my own devices to hack, jump or pootle in school as I wish. She lives in on DIY so I muck out. Owner is struggling more these days so my 3 days have become 4 more often than not, but same money. She has taken me to small local jumping and dressage shows. I suffer from nerves and V has tested these on several times but Owner has always taken time out to help me, pop up and just lurk in the school so I am not alone at the yard when battling to rebuild the confidence.
She is flexible enough about my weekend days so I can take Mrs Spaniel Flyball and I end up feeling rather guilty when I do go away on holidays or change my weekend days as I feel I'm messing her about!
I ride in glasses and cannot see in rain, and before I could drive it would often be a 3 hour round trip to just muck out and go home, so at least I feel I've proved I'm committed!
As above I've learnt to do things I doubt I could do in a school and really appreciate the opportunity. So many people are OCD about their horses and there's some things I grit my teeth on but as long as you can humour each others whims and I guess on the owners side relax enough if things aren't done completely to your standards (but no horse welfare compromise) I think it can work really well.
 

HaleysComet

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My first pony was originally a share! She was an ex riding school pony in a private home on a lovely yard! Basicly had her 2 days a week (one weekday and one weekend) and was allowed to take her to the odd show. The other girl and I would share tack cleaning duties so one week one would clean the bridle and one week the saddle and we would have a little notebook to communicate between each other. We had to pay 1/3 of livery/shoes for the share due to the yard rule of the horses having to have 1 day off! Only snag with this was when the owner outgrew her and my ended up becoming mine!
 
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xgemmax

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I started sharing my first horse when I was 14, didn't work out however, I then started sharing my next horse 6 months later who I am still riding now (I'm 24) and really good friends with the owner :) I have my own horse too now but still help look after him and ride him once a week, so shares can work :)

On the other hand I advertised for a sharer for my own horse and only had a few numpties come forwards, but then he isn't the easiest horse to handle or ride so maybe that put people off (Did explain in his advert)
 

Lexi_

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Extremely positive! I started sharing about three years ago now - Monty was the first good ad I saw, first horse I went to try and it's been largely plain sailing ever since then! He's not always the easiest horse but he's so much fun and he's taken me on my first ever beach ride, fun ride, farm ride and over my first cross-country jumps for over 15 years. I feel so lucky and privileged to be allowed to enjoy him.

His owner is lovely and a really good friend now and so is the sharer of her other horse. Mind you, they're both pregnant and due within three weeks of each other so the next six months will be interesting...
 

Antw23uk

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I found a cracking sharer for my big lad a couple of years ago when I had him on livery. It was through a friend so word of mouth. It wasnt so much about the money but the time. She would go up 2, sometimes 3 times a week and it meant I didnt even have to think 'horses' for those days which made life at home easier (none horsey OH) and renewed my enthusiasm in riding as it didnt all feel like a chore!

Unfortunately she broke her collarbone falling off another horse and it was at a time when I was re thinking the whole horse thing so I found the most perfect loan home for the horse for a year instead which worked out really well. Horse is now back off loan but now kept at home and we are transitioning to barefoot so riding is limited but in the future there is potential for another sharer (previous one now lives too far away) or for the loanee who had him to come share him but no set plans yet.
 

Jasmin2013

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My yard owner has a sharer and tbh she is useless. Pay's £10 a week just to help with shoeing but is always late paying or not at all.
Arranges to ride but doesn't turn up, damaged a brand new £900 saddle within a week with no offer to repair it, is suppose to look after the horse totally if the owner is away, but I end up doing it or they would just be left. supposedly schools the horse couple time a week but the horse now had issues with picking up the correct lead, so I watch her schooling one day and mentioned she was on the wrong lead only to be told 'oh I didn't notice'.
Puts me off ever having a sharer.
 

shadeofshyness

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I find it really depressing that some people are put off by an experience they've had or seen with one nutter. I think a lot are put off by teenagers who take up shares without properly committing - don't want to stereotype all teens because I'm sure there are good ones out there, but most of the long-term successful sharers I know are my age (30ish). I promise there are good sharers out there, people! Like me :p

I've been a sharer for the past 10 years because of my job. I simply can't justify having a horse because I only have one weekend day and two weekday evenings free for horsey time.

I could afford to buy a horse, put it on full livery, and go to the yard 3 x a week, but it seems such a waste of money when I can do a share 3x a week for a fraction of the cost.

My share pony I have now is perfect - an absolute dream who I love to bits. Probably more importantly, I also love his owners and the yard. We have a wonderful long-term arrangement and all get along so well. I look forward to going to the yard, love chatting to the other liveries, love 'my' boy, love hacking out with his owner on her other pony, and I feel VERY lucky to have found this set up! I look after him as if he was my own and sometimes looking forward to our weekly lesson is enough to get me through an horrific day at work!! I've never missed any of my days with him - I adore our time together.

It's just a matter of finding the right owner to share with. Most of them I've had trials with, viewed, met or been on a yard with, would be enough to put anyone off ever going near a horse or a yard ever again :D
 

Shay

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It is good to hear so many positive experiences of sharing. I'm an owner - but daughter's PC pony has sharers as she is onto affiliated horses and he is far too good to be left idle and far too precious to sell or loan!

The experience of sharing when the animal in question is a competent and competitive PC pony is always going to be more complex as you are dealing mainly with children and sometimes with non horsey parents. There are magnificent sharers out there - and we have been privileged to have some. However there are also some absolute horrors.

We have had kids wanting their first experience of owning, kids wanting the opportunity to compete a good pony, kids whose own ponies are out of action, kids who have lost confidence and need something solid to build up again. Kids who needed something more reliable to do their PC tests on. Kids who just wanted their first experiences of hunting or sponsored rides to be a good one. Kids who just wanted him for camp. There is a lot to be gained.

But always against the backdrop of the more difficult ones. Always have a good contract. Be clear in expectations up front. Communicate with each other. Be prepared to meet in the middle - but never compromise the horse. Don't be afraid to walk away if it isn't working.

OP - if you are interested in more feel free to PM so I don't write an essay.
 

abbijay

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I've been on both sides of the fence: I shared before having my own. I wanted to do more than I could in riding schools but I had a long distance boyfriend so I couldn't get one of my own. Mostly they were brilliant but I had an interesting time with the one described as "4 year old, broken 6 months ago and showing maturity beyond his experience" which was actually 3 1/2, just back from 6 weeks at the professional's yard. In retrospect I was nowhere near experienced for either description but I couldn't understand why someone who was retaining possession of the horse would lie through their teeth. I was the only one riding - supposed to be 2 days a week - as the owner was about 2 give birth. When he threw me off for the third time and started napping on the roads I decided to hand him back before he got ruined or I got hurt.
Since having my kids I've had a few sharers and it's generally been a huge success. The one time it didn't end so well was with a sharer was when she'd been the only one riding while I was heavily pregnant and a new mum. When I started riding again I asked her to let me know if there were any of her days (2 per week) she'd not ridden (I was trying to work to a fairly strict fitness plan for us both) and she was so put out by this - she felt it was up to her if she rode or not on the days she was paying for, I on the other hand thought she was paying for the riding time. Turned out she was only riding once most weeks, sometimes not at all through the winter. Then I wanted to go out competing on one of "her" days - our contract stated days to be agreed weekly although she'd had control while I wasn't doing much and I also asked her not to use a particular bit for a couple of weeks - there was still the choice of 2 other bits (his normal flatwork and jumping bits) to choose from - she told me this was unreasonable. I took the bit home to stop it being used and she promptly served me notice! I can understand why she felt I was "interfering" when she had had 6 months of very little input from me but ultimately he's my horse, my choice! It did teach me a lesson in choosing which things matter enough to bring them up with a sharer and to remain consistent in my communication and expectations but being able to go to an occasional competition when I want and having the final word on tack suitable choices are both deal breakers for me.
I've had a few interesting meetings with people who were prospective sharers, "My sister and I had ponies when I was little." Actually meant, "my sister had ponies when I was younger, I went up occasionally to pat it and have a plod on it." Same person also asked if horses had to be mucked out every day and if her 10 year old daughter could help her and learn to ride on my horse (he's 18 hands and although not sharp, very responsive). Another came down to meet me and while having a ride said (not asked) she was going to get a tandem sky diving harness so her 4 year old daughter could join her on hacks on the road!
 

SEL

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I shared a horse in my late 20s when a new mortgage meant I couldn't afford to have my own. My friend kept her horse on the same yard and put the owner in touch with me. The horse had 'issues', so I never paid anything just rode 2-3 times a week gradually persuading a hot German warmblood that life could be taken at a slower pace. There were definitely frustrations on both sides. The owner felt she lost some control and I had to learn not to try and change the way she did things re: feeding, rugging etc.

About a year into the share the owner confessed that she was so desperate for me to take him on that she'd taken the day off work when I'd come to ride. She'd lunged him for an hour in the morning, cooled him off and pretended she'd just got him out the field when I turned up!
 

rascal

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We have had some great people share our horses/ponies over the years, we have also had some that didn't last long as they did something stupid.
One girl was sharing my old pony and we were driving towards the yard one evening to see the sharer in sandals and shorts, bareback on the road, not even a hat! One rule we always have is never ride our horses without a hat. Another time i found my pony shivering in the field, the girl had been out for a ride and not bothered to cool/dry the pony. That was the last straw, she didn't get another chance.

After my daughters outgrew our 12.2 section b we had a string of little jockeys for him. Most were lovely kids, with friendly helpful parents. The last lot on the other hand were a TOTAL NIGHTMARE. The child was ok but the mother! They asked if they could camp at the field for a couple of days, and it was something we often did ourselves so we said fine, but not for any longer as the bloke we rented the field from could be a bit funny. 3 weeks later we had to tell them to go home! As there were no toilets at that yard, i think they used the surrounding fields instead, in fact i know they did. I used to keep an old bucket in one of the stables for my kids, but they didn't even use that. The pony they were riding had had laminitis and was meant to have limited grazing, but have a small hole soaked haynet in his little paddock. This was explained to them. When we had gone home they would let him out of his paddock on to the really good grazing we had there. We had a large plastic water trough that was big enough to last the two ponies who were in the paddock overnight with plenty left over, they swapped it for 1 15 liter bucket. When i pointed out that this wasn't enough for one pony never mind two i was told it was all the child could carry, and not to upset her! They knew perfectly well that there was a tap with a long hose to fill it with. They had been on a tour of the yard, and knew where the taps were. Eventually we got more and more fed up with them. They fed all our horses not just the pony, and they were buying chaff and mix that were full of sugar, and ignoring the high fiber cubes and speedi beet that the vet had recommended, and was in the feed bins in one of the stables. They agreed to pay £50 per month towards the pony's keep, but there was always some excuse, we only got it once. In the end we got so fed up with them, we asked them to hand back the field keys and pony's tack and not come back. This they refused to do. We never got all the pony's tack back, and probably as some sort of payback they stole the three stable cats!!! If i had proof i would have gone to the police, but it was not until i went and asked for the rest of the pony's tack back that i knew it was her. She was a compulsive liar, and i knew she would never admit it.
Needless to say we never now have anyone sharing our horses!!
 

rowan666

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As an owner I will NEVER loan again! All (bar one) they ever want to do is jump the legs off my pony, only brush mane so it comes out in clumps, don't bother poo picking, never show any affection or compassion towards ponies atall, have no regard for expensive tack, never pay on time if atall, worst of all use whips when they think nobody is watching!! (Which i expressly forbid as is not needed) And turn up as and when they feel like it and expect me to ask their permission to ride my own pony just incase they feel like showing up that day. All of those things i specifically stress not to do at time of viewing yet the last 3 sharers have all done all of those things!!! 😠 it's begars belief how stupid some people are and how these novice numpties think it's acceptable to go against owners wishes thinking they know best because they once did an 'own a pony for a day coarse at the local riding school!! God my blood boils just thinking about what my poor ponies have been through with them.
 
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Mrs G

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I was a sharer for about 4yrs; and I will be forever grateful to her owner who became a great friend too. I learnt sooo much from helping look after that little mare. I didn't pay anything but did yard duties/jobs instead and I would go down 3 or 4 times a week, the owner would do the other days, I would cover holidays too. I had pretty much free rein (!) and I mainly hacked, or did a bit of schooling. I had never had sole responsibility for a horse before this and I always saw it as a great privilege that my friend trusted me with her beloved mare.
 
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